"When you have made your decision, go to Mount Guan with Sonorous and play the piece "Blue-Flower Porcelain"."
The night Feng Luodi obtained Sonorous, the Grim Reaper, Phantom, suddenly appeared and told her this.
Feng Luodi had always been caught in a dilemma and had been hesitating to make a choice. Just like that, more than a month had pa.s.sed. When Qi Jianqiu had given birth without a hitch, her mother"s const.i.tution had gotten better, and those beside her no longer forced her to get married to Situ again, she made a decision.
Feng Luodi told herself: I can"t say "see you again" to Situ. I can"t let my tears fall in front of him.
But, despite walking very far into the distance, she could still feel his burning gaze on her.
Her tears were suddenly like a spring gus.h.i.+ng forth and blurred everything before her eyes.
Feng Luodi thought: If G.o.d is watching, then I would definitely be punished by G.o.d for giving up such a wonderful man, for giving up a man who loves me deeply and whom I also love deeply. I chose to return to the 21st century simply because I have to take care of my parents and settle those favours my friends had showered me with, but I have no choice but to take Situ"s feelings away. I will stay single for the rest of my life and die alone.
Feng Luodi told herself again. Before I leave, I mustn"t recall my past memories with Situ. However, memories like to pull people"s legs. The more I try to avoid everything related to Situ, the more those scenes come into view as thick as a hail of snowflakes.
The first time my heart was moved. The lingering kiss. Those pair of deep eyes. Those words of endearment.
The scene that emerged first was how Situ would climb the wall every day to look for her after giving in. He would bring different flowers and drink Autumnal Ombre"s wine every day. He would watch her play the guqin and use his inner force to create a rain of petals.
That man wanted to complete all the romantic things they could do in one month, things that could originally have been done in the future. The heart of the person drinking wine was aching and the heart of the person playing the zither was aching. Yet, the two still wanted to smile at each other and pretended as if they were having a great time and that they were very happy.
Situ was helping her to accomplish her selfish wishes. She had always used her selfish conduct as an excuse.
She would rather have Situ say that he hated her very much. She would rather Situ be the first one to bring up ending their relations.h.i.+p.
But, no matter how selfish she acted, Situ had always been very forgiving and he had always urged her to stay.
Feng Luodi didn"t know how she"d managed to find the place that Phantom had told her about.
With her hazy, teary eyes, she walked towards an open s.p.a.ce area surrounded by wildflowers and weeds. Phantom, clad in solemn black clothes, was standing there, his black eyes staring deeply at her. Everything in the surroundings was like a backdrop, incompatible with Phantom.
"You came in the end."
Rather than as an icy-cold statement, his words sounded more like a sigh.
"I"m here."
Feng Luodi wiped the tears at the corner of her eyes and smiled at Phantom, just like how she smiled when Phantom informed her about the mission and rules back then. After that, she transmigrated all the way to the Xuan Dynasty.
"Do I simply need to play a piece?" Feng Luodi hoa.r.s.ely asked, her gaze fixed on Phantom.
Phantom"s expression remained indifferent as he nodded.
Feng Luodi looked around but she didn"t see where she could place her guqin. Thus, she simply sat down and placed Sonorous on her knees with both her hands pressing on the zither strings. She didn"t move for a long time.
"You can still change your decision now."
Phantom stood about fifty meters away from Feng Luodi, his voice as chilly as the frigid wind.
However, his words helped Feng Luodi harden her heart and proceed.
The sound of the guqin was as mellifluous as it had always been in the past. Yet, it was laden with grief and lingering with the pain of not able to wait for her lover as well as an unimaginable amount of desolateness in her heart.
Is it raining and misty in Jiangnan?
Is my lover on the other side of the sh.o.r.e?
Those zither strings were like knives, cutting her hands until they were bleeding but she didn"t stop for a rest.
This was a tune she had memorised with her heart. It was the tune she brought from the 21st century and also the tune she used to gain fame in Chang"an. It was the tune that let her get acquainted with Situ and Jiang Moyin and also the tune that ended all her connections to the Xuan Kingdom.
When the piece ended, Feng Luodi lowered her head and was thinking about something while the surrounding scenery didn"t change at all.
Only after a long time did Feng Luodi come back to her senses, she was about to stand up and ask Phantom how she could return to the 21st century when Phantom beat her to it and spoke, forcefully causing Feng Luodi to sit down again.
"Sorry, Luodi. I lied to you."
"Lied to me?" Feng Luodi looked at Phantom in astonishment. "What do you mean?"
Phantom was still standing at a distance which was neither too far nor too close to Feng Luodi. His voice was still icy-cold but the words he said sounded apologetic.
"From the very beginning, you already couldn"t return to the 21st century."
"What?"
The hand Feng Luodi used to play the guqin plucked a string until it snapped, producing an ear-piercing sound.
Her thoughts were a mess. She had gone through great trouble in the last three years to find all the guqins. But, in the end, she was told that she couldn"t go back and that everything was just her own delusions? Everything she had done turned out to be a joke…
"What"s all this about?" Feng Luodi muttered.
Phantom tilted his head slightly and turned around to face Feng Luodi, speaking slowly but forcefully, "You were in a car accident in the 21st century and died on the spot. You weren"t lying in the hospital in a vegetative state while receiving treatment. It has been almost three years and your parents have also long accepted your death. They"re living very well now. You don"t have to worry about that."
"But this isn"t what you said back then."
Feng Luodi felt as if her heart was unceasingly being ripped apart, even though it had long being riddled with gaping wounds, it was still beating.
"You clearly told me that my life span had yet to end so I needed to go to another dimension to complete a mission, and once my body recovers, I would be able to go back."
Feng Luodi was unwilling to bring herself to believe this truth no matter what. She even started to cast a resentful gaze at Phantom.
"I was lying to you about that," Phantom admitted to this matter calmly.
"Only by lying to you that your life span had yet to end would you agree to come to this world and continue to live on as Feng Luodi. Only by making these ten guqins very hard to find would you spend a lot of time and form bonds in this world. Only by doing this will you be able to live a new life."
For the first time, there were fluctuations in Phantom"s expression. He was originally a grim reaper with no feelings and no desires.
"I thought that in close to three years, you would have a new family, new friends and a lover, so you would choose to stay here. You should have chosen to stay behind."
The truth didn"t appear cruel but it was able to push her into h.e.l.l.
The feeling of dropping from heaven to h.e.l.l was really unbearably painful.
Feng Luodi"s voice was already hoa.r.s.e. Despite that, she still wanted to howl loudly at Phantom. "Then why did you want to do that? Was it because this Feng Luodi"s life span had yet to end so you required a soul replace her? Or was it because I am a test subject for you grim reapers? Why was it me? Why didn"t you take me to h.e.l.l from the beginning? The feeling of hope…hope becoming despair…do you know how it feels like?!"
Feng Luodi had never forgotten herself like this, but she was just a lowly human. In the presence of such a tremendous power, she was so trivial and powerless.
"Regarding this, no matter what you think, I only wanted to inform you about this matter today. Your new life has just started. You don"t have to be this sad."
Despite fluctuating emotions flas.h.i.+ng across his eyes, Phantom"s tone was cold.
"Haha, my life has started?" Feng Luodi sneered in a deranged manner. "I gave Situ up and I wanted to return to my parents" side. Yet, you"re telling me now that all my past efforts and all my choices are make-believe, that they are all a joke…and I don"t get to be sad? I would rather return to three years ago and let you take my soul down to h.e.l.l."
Feng Luodi cried and laughed at the same time. When influenced by such strong emotions, Luo Di"s soul really had some faint signs of breaking away from her current body. Before that, Phantom ascertained that Luo Di"s soul and Feng Luodi"s body were compatible.
For a split second, Phantom panicked but when he saw a distant figure rapidly das.h.i.+ng towards them, he chose to leave instead.
"No matter what, I hope that you can accept all of this and keep on living properly here."
The instant Phantom vanished, Situ appeared at Feng Luodi"s side. She was crying and weeping in extreme despair and he attempted to help her up.
"Luodi, what"s wrong?"
Feng Luodi turned a deaf ear to it. Apart from crying and laughing, she was unable to utter a single word.
Looking at such a Feng Luodi, Situ felt as if someone was using a knife to stab his heart. At this moment, the only thing he could do was to embrace Feng Luodi tightly and gently comfort her.
A person donned in white and a person donned in black. The two people embracing each other appeared very harmonious from afar. One was crying while one was consoling and it seemed like they had blended into the world between heaven and earth.
Phantom stood at a distance and stared at this scene unfolding with his cold eyes until another grim reaper had appeared.
"You could have told her from the start." The other grim reaper was also clad in solemn black clothes but the expression on his countenance appeared more human-like than Phantom"s.
"You should have told her from the beginning that she was already dead and that you were willing to give her a chance to live again and continue living on by becoming this person. You have to know that this person"s life span is very long. Anyone would be willing to live again so she wouldn"t have rejected you. Why must you give her a mission and let her waste three years before informing her about this truth, causing her to be grieved and resent you? You even did a good deed in vain."
The other grim reaper was still expressionless but the words he spoke carried a trace of humanity.
"She wouldn"t. If I had told her at the beginning, she would have chosen death without the slightest hesitation and not live again with someone else"s ident.i.ty."
"You"re not even her so how would you know?" The other grim reaper disapproved but carefully looked at the senior he had always admired from the corner of his eye.
"I know how her temperament. She wouldn"t have done that."
Phantom still remembered that it had been an extremely frigid winter day. There was a heavy snowfall in that modernised city and he had no choice but to transform into a boy to complete a mission.
Due to his comrade"s mistake, a boy in thin clothes without a single cent had no choice but to rely on his scanty clues to search for someone and take his life away.
It was then that he got acquainted with Luo Di. At that time, Luo Di was still a third-year university student. She was a girl who clearly suffered a lot of grievances but still smiled beautifully. She was a girl who would give her friends a.s.siduous and thoughtful attention. She was a girl who would take care of her parents.
The two of them met in the streets. Without giving him any chance to speak, she bought him cotton-padded clothes, helped him warm his hands and even helped him search for the person he was looking for.
As the clues were too meagre, they spent more than a month to find that person.
After completing his mission, he vanished and without even saying a word of thanks, but Luo Di was still the same bubbly girl who liked to smile.
He didn"t know why but he"d started to follow Luo Di ever since. He watched her grow and suffer, and watched her as she grew strong and tenacious until she was involved in a car accident and her lifespan had ended.
His recollection was merely for an instant. What entered his eyes was still the two embracing one another.
Phantom glanced at that woman profoundly and then turned around to leave.
The other grim reaper called out from behind. "Senior, where are you going?"
"To complete my mission."
"But you still have to take care of twenty people before you can reincarnate…" Realisation suddenly dawned on him. "Are you going to reincarnate?"