"You must stop this now. There is no use in it, and I will not have it," said I, resolutely.
My boy choked down for a few moments at this, and half stifled his grief; but o"ermastering him, it flowed on again as wildly as ever.
I felt impatient.
"Stop this moment, I say!" And I took hold of his arm firmly. My will is strong, and when a little excited, it often leads me beyond where I would go in moments of reflection. My boy knew this by experience. By my manner of speaking he saw that I was in earnest, and that, if he did not obey me, punishment would follow. So, with what must have been a powerful effort for one so young, he stifled the utterance of his grief. But, the storm within raged none the less violently, and I could see his little frame quiver as he strove to repress the rising sobs.
Turning away from me, he went and sat down on a low seat in a corner of the room. I saw his form in the gla.s.s as I stood before it to arrange my hair, after laying aside my bonnet; and for the first time my feelings were touched. There was an abandonment in his whole att.i.tude; an air of grief about him that affected me with pity and tenderness.
"Poor child!" I sighed. "His heart is almost broken. I ought to have said yes or no; and then all would have been settled."
"Come," said I, after a few moments, reaching my hand towards the child--"let us go down and look out for father. He will be home soon."
I spoke kindly and cheerfully. But he neither moved, looked up, nor gave the smallest sign that he heard me.
"Oh, well," said I, with some impatience in my voice--"it doesn"t matter at all. If you"d rather sit there than come down into the parlor and look out for dear father, you can please yourself."
And turning away as I spoke, I left the chamber, and went down stairs. Seating myself at the window, I looked forth and endeavored to feel unconcerned and cheerful. But, this was beyond my power. I saw nothing but the form of my grieving child, and could think of nothing but his sorrow and disappointment.
"Nancy," said I to one of my domestics, who happened to come into the parlor to ask me some question, "I wish you would run down to the toy store in the next block, and buy Neddy a wagon. His heart is almost broken about one."
The girl, always willing, when kindly spoke to, ran off to obey my wishes, and in a little while came back with the article wanted.
"Now," said I, "go up into my room and tell Neddy that I"ve got something for him. Don"t mention the wagon; I want to take him by surprise."
Nancy went bounding up the stairs, and I placed the wagon in the centre of the room where it would meet the child"s eyes on the moment of his entrance, and then sat down to await his coming, and enjoy his surprise and delight.
After the lapse of about a minute, I heard Nancy coming down slowly.
"Neddy"s asleep," said she, looking in at the door.
"Asleep!" I felt greatly disappointed.
"Yes, ma"am. He was on the floor asleep. I took him up, and laid him in your bed."
"Then he"s over his troubles," said I, attempting to find a relief for my feelings in this utterance. But no such relief came.
Taking the wagon in my hand, I went up to the chamber where he lay, and bent over him. The signs of grief were still upon his innocent face, and every now and then a faint sigh or sob gave evidence that even sleep had not yet hushed entirely, the storm which had swept over him.
"Neddy!" I spoke to him in a voice of tenderness, hoping that my words might reach his ear, "Neddy, dear, I"ve bought you a wagon."
But his senses were locked. Taking him up, I undressed him, and then, after kissing his lips, brow, and cheeks, laid him in his little bed, and placed the wagon on the pillow beside him.
Even until the late hour at which I retired on that evening, were my feelings oppressed by the incident I have described. My "May be so,"
uttered in order to avoid giving the direct answer my child wanted, had occasioned him far more pain than a positive refusal of his request could have done.
"I will be more careful in future," said I, as I lay thinking about the occurrence, "how I create false hopes. My yea shall be yea, and my nay nay. Of these cometh not evil."
In the morning when I awoke, I found Neddy in possession of his wagon. He was running with it around the room, as happy as if a tear had never been upon his cheek. I looked at him for many minutes without speaking. At last, seeing that I was awake, he bounded up to the bedside, and, kissing me, said:
"Thank you, dear mother, for buying me this wagon! You are a good mother!"
I must own to having felt some doubts on the subject of Neddy"s compliment at the time. Since this little experience, I have been more careful how I answer the pet.i.tions of my children; and avoid the "May be so," "I"ll see about it," and other such evasive answers that come so readily to the lips. The good result I have experienced in many instances.
CHAPTER XXV.
"THE POOR CHILD DIED."
MY baby, nine months old, had some fever, and seemed very unwell.
One neighbor said:
"You"d better send for the doctor."
Another suggested that it had, no doubt, eaten something that disagreed with it, and that a little antimonial wine would enable it to throw it off; another advised a few grains of calomel, and another a dose of rheubarb. But I said:
"No. I"ll wait a little while, and see if it won"t get better."
"You should give him medicine in time. Many a person dies from not taking medicine in time;" said a lady who expressed more than usual concern for the well-being of my baby. She had a very sick child herself.
"Many more die," I replied, "from taking medicine too soon. I believe that one half of the diseases in the world are produced by medicines, and that the other half are often made worse by their injudicious administration."
"You"d better send for the doctor," urged the lady.
"No. I"ll wait until the morning, and then, if he"s no better, or should be worse, I"ll call in our physician. Children often appear very sick one hour, and are comparatively well again in the next."
"It"s a great risk," said the lady, gravely. "A very great risk. I called in the doctor the moment my dear little Eddy began to droop about. And it"s well I did. He"s near death"s door as it is; and without medical aid I would certainly have lost him before this.
He"s only been sick a week, and you know yourself how low he is reduced. Where do you think he would have been without medicine? The disease has taken a terrible hold of him. Why, the doctor has bled him twice; and his little chest is raw all over from a blister. He has been cupped and leeched. We have had mustard plasters upon his arms and the calves of his legs. I don"t know how many grains of calomel he has taken; and it has salivated him dreadfully. Oh! such a sore mouth! Poor child! He suffers dreadfully. Besides, he has taken some kind of powder almost every hour. They are dreadfully nauseous; and we have to hold him, every time, and pour them down his throat. Oh, dear! It makes my heart sick. Now, with all this, the disease hangs on almost as bad as ever. Suppose we hadn"t sent for the doctor at first? Can"t you see what would have been the consequence? It is very wrong to put off calling in a physician upon the first symptoms of a disease."
"Pardon me, Mrs. Lee, for saying so," was my reply, "but I cannot help thinking that, if you had not called the doctor, your child would have been quite well to-day."
Mrs. Lee--that was the lady"s name--uttered an exclamation of surprise and disapproval of my remark.
"But, cannot you see, yourself; that it is not the disease that has reduced your child so low. The bleeding, blistering, cupping, leeching, and calomel administrations, would have done all this, had your child been perfectly well when it went into the doctor"s hands."
"But the disease would have killed him inevitably. If it requires all this to break it, don"t you see that it must have taken a most fatal hold on the poor child"s system."
"No, Mrs. Lee, I cannot see any such thing," was my reply. "The medicine probably fixed the disease, that would, if left alone, have retired of itself. What does the doctor say ails the child?"
"He does not seem to know. There seems to be a complication of diseases."
"Produced by the treatment, no doubt. If there had been scarlet fever, or small pox, or croup, active and energetic treatment would, probably, have been required, and the doctor would have known what he was about in administering his remedies. But, in a slight indisposition, like that from which your child suffered, it is, in my opinion, always better to give no medicine for a time. Drugs thrown into the tender system of a child, will always produce disease of some kind, more or less severe; and where slight disorders already exist, they are apt to give them a dangerous hold upon the body, or, uniting with them, cause a most serious, and, at times, fatal illness."
But Mrs. Lee shook her head. She thought the doctors knew best. They had great confidence in their family physician. He had doctored them through many dangerous attacks, and had always brought them through safely. As to the new-fangled notions about giving little or no medicine, she had no confidence in them. Medicine was necessary at times, and she always gave her children medicine at least two, or three times a year, whether they were sick or well. Prevention, in her eyes, was better than cure. And where there was actual sickness, she was in favor of vigorous treatment. One good dose of medicine would do more good than a hundred little ones; with much more to the same effect.
On the next morning, my dear baby, who was just as sick for a few hours as Mrs. Lee"s child was at first, was as well as ever.