This was exactly the kind of thing I didn"t want to have to do.
I guess we just keep an eye out for now. That" s all we can do. You should probably take a nap, Leah.
You"ve had as much sleep as I have.
Thought you were going to do what you were told?
Right. That" s going to get old, she grumbled, and then she yawned. Well, whatever . I don" t care.
I"ll run the border , Jake. I"m not tired at all. Seth was so glad I hadn"t forced them home, he was all but prancing with excitement.
Sure, sure. I"m going to go check in with the Cullens.
Seth took off along the new path worn into the damp earth. Leah looked after him thoughtfully.
Maybe a round or two before I crash.... Hey Seth, wanna see how many times I can lap you?
NO!
Barking out a low chuckle, Leah lunged into the woods after him.
I growled uselessly. So much for peace and quiet.
Leah was trying-for Leah. She kept her jibes to a minimum as she raced around the circuit, but it was impossible not to be aware of her smug mood. I thought of the whole "two"s company" saying. It didn"t really apply, because one was plenty to my mind. But if there had to be three of us, it was hard to think of anyone that I wouldn"t trade her for.Paul? she suggested.
Maybe, I allowed.
She laughed to herself, too jittery and hyper to get offended. I wondered how long the buzz from dodging Sam"s pity would last.
That will be my goal, then-to be less annoying than Paul.
Yeah, work on that.
I changed into my other form when I was a few yards from the lawn. I hadn"t been planning to spend much time human here. But I hadn"t been planning to have Leah in my head, either. I pulled on my ragged shorts and started across the lawn.
The door opened before I got to the steps, and I was surprised to see Carlisle rather than Edward step outside to meet me-his face looked exhausted and defeated. For a second, my heart froze. I faltered to a stop, unable to speak.
"Are you all right, Jacob?" Carlisle asked.
"Is Bella?" I choked out.
"She"s... much the same as last night. Did I startle you? I"m sorry. Edward said you were coming in your human form, and I came out to greet you, as he didn"t want to leave her. She"s awake."
And Edward didn"t want to lose any time with her, because he didn"t have much time left. Carlisle didn"t say the words out loud, but he might as well have.
It had been a while since I"d slept-since before my last patrol. I could really feel that now. I took a step forward, sat down on the porch steps, and slumped against the railing.
Moving whisper-quiet as only a vampire could, Carlisle took a seat on the same step, against the other railing.
"I didn"t get a chance to thank you last night, Jacob. You don"t know how much I appreciate your... compa.s.sion. I know your goal was to protect Bella, but I owe you the safety of the rest of my family as well. Edward told me what you had to do..."
"Don"t mention it," I muttered.
"If you prefer."
We sat in silence. I could hear the others in the house. Emmett, Alice, and Jasper, speaking in low, serious voices upstairs. Esme humming tunelessly in another room.
Rosalie and Edward breathing close by-I couldn"t tell which was which, but I could hear the difference in Bella"s labored panting. I could hear her heart, too. It seemed...
uneven.It was like fate was out to make me do everything I"d ever sworn I wouldn"t in the course of twenty-four hours. Here I was, hanging around, waiting for her to die.
I didn"t want to listen anymore. Talking was better than listening.
"She"s family to you?" I asked Carlisle. It had caught my notice before, when he"d said I"d helped the rest of his family, too.
"Yes. Bella is already a daughter to me. A beloved daughter."
"But you"re going to let her die."
He was quiet long enough that I looked up. His face was very, very tired. I knew how he felt.
"I can imagine what you think of me for that," he finally said. "But I can"t ignore her will. It wouldn"t be right to make such a choice for her, to force her."
I wanted to be angry with him, but he was making it hard. It was like he was throwing my own words back at me, just scrambled up. They"d sounded right before, but they couldn"t be right now. Not with Bella dying. Still... I remembered how it felt to be broken on the ground under Sam-to have no choice but be involved in the murder of someone I loved. It wasn"t the same, though. Sam was wrong. And Bella loved things she shouldn"t.
"Do you think there"s any chance she"ll make it? I mean, as a vampire and all that. She told me about... about Esme."
"I"d say there"s an even chance at this point," he answered quietly. "I"ve seen vampire venom work miracles, but there are conditions that even venom cannot overcome. Her heart is working too hard now; if it should fail... there won"t be anything for me to do."
Bella"s heartbeat throbbed and faltered, giving an agonizing emphasis to his words.
Maybe the planet had started turning backward. Maybe that would explain how everything was the opposite of what it had been yesterday-how I could be hoping for what had once seemed like the very worst thing in the world.
"What is that thing doing to her?" I whispered. "She was so much worse last night. I saw... the tubes and all that. Through the window."
"The fetus isn"t compatible with her body. Too strong, for one thing, but she could probably endure that for a while. The bigger problem is that it won"t allow her to get the sustenance she needs. Her body is rejecting every form of nutrition. I"m trying to feed her intravenously, but she"s just not absorbing it. Everything about her condition is accelerated. I"m watching her-and not just her, but the fetus as well-starve to death by the hour. I can"t stop it and I can"t slow it down. I can"t figure out what it wants." His weary voice broke at the end. I felt the same way I had yesterday, when I"d seen the black stains across her stomach- furious, and a little crazy.
I clenched my hands into fists to control the shaking. I hated the thing that was hurting her. It wasn"t enough for the monster to beat her from the inside out. No, it was starving her, too. Probably just looking for something to sink its teeth into-a throat to suck dry.
Since it wasn"t big enough to kill anyone else yet, it settled for sucking Bella"s life from her.
I could tell them exactly what it wanted: death and blood, blood and death.
My skin was all hot and p.r.i.c.kly. I breathed slowly in and out, focusing on that to calm myself.
"I wish I could get a better idea of what exactly it is," Carlisle murmured. "The fetus is well protected. I haven"t been able to produce an ultrasonic image. I doubt there is any way to get a needle through the amniotic sac, but Rosalie won"t agree to let me try, in any case."
"A needle?" I mumbled. "What good would that do?"
"The more I know about the fetus, the better I can estimate what it will be capable of.
What I wouldn"t give for even a little amniotic fluid. If I knew even the chromosomal count ..."
"You"re losing me, Doc. Can you dumb it down?"
He chuckled once-even his laugh sounded exhausted. "Okay. How much biology have you taken? Did you study chromosomal pairs?"
"Think so. We have twenty-three, right?"
"Humans do."
I blinked. "How many do you have?"
"Twenty-five."
I frowned at my fists for a second. "What does that mean?"
"I thought it meant that our species were almost completely different. Less related than a lion and a house cat. But this new life-well, it suggests that we"re more genetically compatible than I"d thought." He sighed sadly. "I didn"t know to warn them."
I sighed, too. It had been easy to hate Edward for the same ignorance. I still hated him for it. It was just hard to feel the same way about Carlisle. Maybe because I wasn"t ten shades of jealous in Carlisle"s case. "It might help to know what the count was-whether the fetus was closer to us or to her.
To know what to expect." Then he shrugged. "And maybe it wouldn"t help anything. I guess I just wish I had something to study, anything to do."
"Wonder what my chromosomes are like," I muttered randomly. I thought of those Olympic steroids tests again. Did they run DNA scans?
Carlisle coughed self-consciously. "You have twenty-four pairs, Jacob."
I turned slowly to stare at him, raising my eyebrows.
He looked embarra.s.sed. "I was... curious. I took the liberty when I was treating you last June."
I thought about it for a second. "I guess that should p.i.s.s me off. But I don"t really care."
"I"m sorry. I should have asked."
"S"okay, Doc. You didn"t mean any harm."
"No, I promise you that I did not mean you any harm. It"s just that... I find your species fascinating. I suppose that the elements of vampiric nature have come to seem commonplace to me over the centuries. Your family"s divergence from humanity is much more interesting. Magical, almost."
"Bibbidi-Bobbidi-Boo," I mumbled. He was just like Bella with all the magic garbage.
Carlisle laughed another weary laugh.
Then we heard Edward"s voice inside the house, and we both paused to listen.
"I"ll be right back, Bella. I want to speak with Carlisle for a moment. Actually, Rosalie, would you mind accompanying me?" Edward sounded different. There was a little life in his dead voice. A spark of something. Not hope exactly, but maybe the desire to hope.
"What is it, Edward?" Bella asked hoa.r.s.ely.
"Nothing you need to worry about, love. It will just take a second. Please, Rose?"
"Esme?" Rosalie called. "Can you mind Bella for me?"
I heard the whisper of wind as Esme flitted down the stairs.
"Of course," she said.
Carlisle shifted, twisting to look expectantly at the door. Edward was through the door first, with Rosalie right on his heels. His face was, like his voice, no longer dead. He seemed intensely focused. Rosalie looked suspicious.
Edward shut the door behind her."Carlisle," he murmured.
"What is it, Edward?"
"Perhaps we"ve been going about this the wrong way. I was listening to you and Jacob just now, and when you were speaking of what the... fetus wants, Jacob had an interesting thought."
Me? What had I thought? Besides my obvious hatred for the thing? At least I wasn"t alone in that. I could tell that Edward had a difficult time using a term as mild as fetus.
"We haven"t actually addressed that angle," Edward went on. "We"ve been trying to get Bella what she needs. And her body is accepting it about as well as one of ours would.
Perhaps we should address the needs of the... fetus first. Maybe if we can satisfy it, we"ll be able to help her more effectively."
"I"m not following you, Edward," Carlisle said.
"Think about it, Carlisle. If that creature is more vampire than human, can"t you guess what it craves-what it"s not getting? Jacob did."
I did? I ran through the conversation, trying to remember what thoughts I"d kept to myself. I remembered at the same time that Carlisle understood.
"Oh," he said in a surprised tone. "You think it is... thirsty?"
Rosalie hissed under her breath. She wasn"t suspicious anymore. Her revoltingly perfect face was all lit up, her eyes wide with excitement. "Of course," she muttered. "Carlisle, we have all that type O negative laid aside for Bella. It"s a good idea," she added, not looking at me.
"Hmm." Carlisle put his hand to his chin, lost in thought. "I wonder... And then, what would be the best way to administer..."
Rosalie shook her head. "We don"t have time to be creative. I"d say we should start with the traditional way."
"Wait a minute," I whispered. "Just hold on. Are you-are you talking about making Bella drink blood?"
"It was your idea, dog," Rosalie said, scowling at me without ever quite looking at me.
I ignored her and watched Carlisle. That same ghost of hope that had been in Edward"s face was now in the doctor"s eyes. He pursed his lips, speculating.
"That"s just ..." I couldn"t find the right word.
"Monstrous?" Edward suggested. "Repulsive?"
"Pretty much.""But what if it helps her?" he whispered.
I shook my head angrily. "What are you gonna do, shove a tube down her throat?"