"It seems so dull without Miss Jocelyn," she said, the first evening.
"She was such a lively young lady, and made us all cheerful. Why, she would run in and out the kitchen a dozen times a day, to feed the chickens, or pet the cat, or watch me knead the bread. She and Nathaniel got on famously together, and often I have found her helping him with the books, and laughing so merrily when he made a mistake. I used to think Nathaniel did it on purpose sometimes, just for the fun of it."
Yes, we all missed Jill, and I for one loved the girl dearly. It made me quite happy one day when she wrote a long letter, telling me that she was delighted with her new governess.
"Miss Gillespie is as nice as possible," she wrote. "I already feel quite fond of her; my lessons are as interesting now as they used to be dull with Fraulein. She knows a great deal, and is not ashamed to confess when she is ignorant of anything; she says right out that she cannot answer my questions, and proposes that we should study it together. I quite enjoy our walks and talks, for she takes so much interest in all I tell her.
She is a little dull and sad sometimes, as though she were thinking of past troubles; but I like to feel that I can cheer her up and do her good. Mother and Sara are delighted with her; she plays so beautifully, and they say that she is such a gentlewoman. When we come downstairs in the evening she will not allow me to creep into a corner; she makes me join in the conversation, and coaxes me to play my pieces; and she tries to prevent mother making horrid little remarks on my awkwardness.
""It will all come right, Mrs. Garston," I heard her say one day. "It is far wiser not to notice it: young girls are so sensitive, and Jocelyn is keenly alive to her shortcomings." And mother actually nodded a.s.sent to this, and the next moment she called me up, and said how much I had improved in my playing, and that Colonel Ferguson had told her that I had been exceedingly well taught.
"By the bye, I am quite sure that Colonel Ferguson intends to be my brother-in-law: he is always here in the evening, and yesterday he sent Sara such a magnificent bouquet."
Jill"s chatty letters were always amusing. She had prepared me beforehand, so I was not surprised at receiving a voluminous letter from Aunt Philippa a few days afterwards, informing me of Sara"s engagement to Colonel Ferguson.
"Your uncle and I are delighted with the match," she wrote. "Colonel Ferguson belongs to a very good old family, and he has private property.
Your uncle says that he is a very intelligent man, and is much respected in the regiment.
"Mrs. Fullerton thinks it is a pity for Sara to marry a widower; but I call that nonsense; he is a young-looking man for his age, and every one thinks him so handsome. Sara, poor darling, is as happy as possible. I believe that they are to be married soon after Easter, as he wants to get some salmon fishing in Norway: so we shall come up to Hyde Park Gate early next week, and see about the trousseau, for there is no time to be lost."
Sara added a few words in her pretty girlish handwriting.
"I wonder if you will be very much surprised by mamma"s letter, Ursula dear. We all thought he liked Lesbia, but no, he says that was entirely a mistake on our part, he never really thought of her at all.
"Of course I am very happy. I think there is no one like Donald in the world. I cannot imagine why such a wise, clever man should fall in love with a silly little body like me. I suppose I must please him in some way, for, really, he seems dreadfully in love.
"You must come to my wedding, Ursula, and I must choose your dress for you; of course father will pay for it, but I promise you it shall be pretty, and suitable to your complexion. I mean to have eight bridesmaids. Jocelyn will be one, of course, and I shall get that tall, fair Grace Underley to act as a foil to her bigness. I shall not ask poor Lesbia to be one; it would be too trying for her, and I know you will not care about it; but you must come for a week, and see all my pretty things, and help poor mamma, for she has only Jocelyn: so remember you are to keep yourself disengaged the week after Easter."
I wrote back that same evening warm congratulations to Sara and Aunt Philippa, and promised to come when Sara wanted me. A gay wedding was not to my taste, but I knew I owed this duty to them: they had been kind to me in their own fashion and according to their lights, and I would not fail them. Easter would fall late this year,--in the middle of April: there were still three months before Sara would be married, and most likely by that time I should need a few days" rest and change.
The next morning I heard from Lesbia. It was a kind, sad little letter; she told me she was glad about Sara"s engagement, and as they were still at Hastings she and her mother had called at Warrior Square, and had found Sara and her _fiance_ together.
"I think it has improved Sara already," it went on; "she was looking exceedingly pretty, and in good spirits, and she seemed very proud of her tall, grave-looking soldier. Mother and I always liked Colonel Ferguson. He and Sara are complete contrasts; I think her brightness and good-humour, as well as her beauty, have attracted him, for he is honestly in love! I liked the quiet, deferential way in which he treated her. I am sure he will make a kind husband. Mrs. Garston looked as happy as possible. I did not see Jocelyn; she was out riding with her father.
"We are going down to dear Rutherford in March, but I have promised Sara to come up for the wedding. Don"t sigh, Ursula: it is all in the day"s work, and one has to do trying things sometimes.
"I have come to think that perhaps dear Charlie is better off where he is. He was so enthusiastic and so true that life must have disappointed him. Perhaps I should have disappointed him too; but no, I should have loved him too well to do that.
"I shall love to be at Rutherford during the spring. Everything will remind me of those sweet spring days two years ago. Oh, those walks and rides, and the evening when we listened to the nightingale and he told me that he loved me! I remember the very patch of gra.s.s where I stood. There was a little clump of alders, and I can see how he looked then. Oh, Ursula, these memories are very sad, but they are sweet, too; for Charlie is our Charlie still, is he not?"
"Poor Lesbia!" I sighed, as I folded up her letter and prepared for my day"s work. "It must be hard for her to witness Sara"s happiness, when her own life is so clouded. Her heart is still true to Charlie; but she is so young, and life is so long. I trust that better things are in store for her."
Miss Locke was recovering very slowly. Years of anxiety and hard work had overtaxed her strength sorely. Mr. Hamilton used to shake his head over her tardy progress, and tell her that she was a very unsatisfactory patient, and that he had expected to cure her long before this.
"If it were not for you and my dear Miss Garston, I should never be lying here now," she returned gratefully. "I must have died; you know that, doctor; and even now, in spite of all the good things you send me, I am so weary and fit for nothing I feel as though I should never sit up again."
"Oh, we shall have you up before long," he returned cheerfully. "You are only rather slow about it. You are not troubling about your work or anything else, I hope, because the rent is paid, and there is plenty in the cupboard for Phoebe and Kitty."
"I know you have paid the rent, and I shall never be grateful enough to you, doctor; for what should I have done, with this long illness making me behindhand with everything? I am afraid Miss Garston puts her hand in her pocket sometimes. I hope the Lord will bless you both for your goodness to two helpless women. Ay, and he will bless you, doctor!"
"I am sure I hope so," he returned, in a good-humoured tone, shaking her hand. "There! mind what your nurse says, and keep yourself easy: you will find Phoebe a different person when you see her next."
I was afraid Phoebe would find her sister much changed when they met.
Miss Locke had greatly aged since her illness; her hair was much grayer, and her face was sunken, and I doubted whether she would ever be the same woman again. Mr. Hamilton and I had already discussed the sisters"
future.
"I am afraid they will be terribly pinched," he said once. "Miss Locke is suffering now from years of overwork. She will never be able to work as hard as she has done. And she has to provide for that child Kitty, as well as for poor Phoebe."
"We must think what is to be done," I replied. "Miss Locke is a very good manager: she is careful and thrifty. A little will go a long way with her."
Mr. Hamilton said no more on the subject just then, but a few days afterwards he told me that he intended to buy the cottage. He had a good deal of house-property in Heathfield, and a cottage more or less did not matter to him.
"They shall live in it rent-free, and I will take care of the repairs.
There will be no need for Miss Locke to work so hard then. She is a good woman, and I thoroughly respect her. Of course I know she is a favourite of yours, Miss Garston, but you must not think that influences me."
"As though I should imagine such a thing!" I returned, in quite an affronted tone. But Mr. Hamilton only laughed.
"You are such an insignificant person, you see," he went on mischievously. "You are of so little use to your generation. People do not benefit by your example, or defer to your opinion. There is no St.
Ursula in the calendar." Now what did he mean by all this rigmarole? But he only laughed again in a provoking way, and went out.
I had had both the sisters on my hands. Those hours of fearful suspense had told on Phoebe, and for a week or two we were very anxious about her.
I kept the extent of her illness from Susan, and she never knew that Mr. Hamilton visited her daily. Strange to say, Phoebe gave us little trouble. She bore her bodily sufferings with surprising patience, and even made light of them; and she would thank me most gratefully when I waited on her.
I was never long in her room. There was no reading or singing now.
Nothing would induce her to keep me from Susan. She used to beg me to go back to Susan and leave her to Kitty. I never forgot Susan"s look of astonishment when I told her this.
"Somehow, it doesn"t sound like Phoebe," she said, looking at me a little wistfully. "Are you sure you understand her, Miss Garston?--that something has not put her out? She has often sulked with me like that."
"Oh, Phoebe never sulks now," I returned, smiling at this view of the case. "She is not like the same woman, Susan. She thinks of other people now." Miss Locke heard me silently, but I saw that she was still incredulous. She was not sanguine enough to hope for a miracle; and surely only a miracle could change Phoebe"s sullen and morbid nature.
The sisters were longing to meet, but the helplessness of the one and the long-protracted weakness of the other kept them long apart, though only a short flight of stairs divided them.
At last I thought we might venture to bring Susan into Phoebe"s room.
The weather was less severe, and Susan seemed a little stronger, so Kitty and I hurried ourselves in preparation for a festive tea in Phoebe"s room.
She watched us with unconcealed interest as we spread the tea-cloth, and arranged the best china, and then placed an easy-chair by her bedside.
The room really looked very bright and cosy. A little gray kitten that I had brought Kitty was asleep on the quilt; Phoebe had taken a great fancy to the pretty, playful little creature, and it was always with her; Kitty"s large wax doll was lying with its curly head on her pillow.
Susan trembled very much as she entered the room, leaning heavily on my arm. Phoebe lay quite motionless, watching her as she walked slowly towards the bed, then her face suddenly grew pitiful, and she held out her arms.
"Oh, how ill you look, my poor Susan, and so old and gray! but what does it matter, so that I have got my Susan back? If you had died, I should have died too; G.o.d never meant to punish me like that." And she stroked and kissed her face as though she were a child, and for a little while the two sisters mingled their tears together.
Susan was too weak for much emotion, so I placed her comfortably in her easy-chair, and bade her look at Phoebe without troubling to talk; but her heart was too full for silence.
"Why, my woman," she burst out, "you look real bonnie! I do believe your face has got a bit of colour in it, and you remind me of the old Phoebe; nay," as Phoebe laughed at this, "I never thought to hear you laugh again, my dearie."
"It is with the pleasure of seeing you," returned Phoebe. "If you only knew what I suffered while you lay ill! "there is no improvement," they said, and Miss Garston looked at me so pityingly; and if you had died and never spoken to me again,--and I had refused to bid you good-night,--you remember, Susan! oh, I think my heart would have broken if you had gone away and left me like that."