He shook his head.
"Aren"t you going to talk to me?"
d.a.m.n. Pull it together, fool! Pull it together, fool!
"Are you mad at my uncles?"
He shook his head again. There was nothing nothing safe to say. Nothing safe to do. She was the one who needed to know. He knew everything. And if there was a way out for Jordan it was going to be in her administration-someday. If there was any hope at all. safe to say. Nothing safe to do. She was the one who needed to know. He knew everything. And if there was a way out for Jordan it was going to be in her administration-someday. If there was any hope at all.
She was silent a long time. Just waiting for him. Knowing, surely, that he was fracturing. Himself, who was thirty-four years old; and not doing well at all.
He leaned forward, elbows on knees, studied the dust between his feet, then looked up at her.
No knowledge at all of what the first Ari had done to him. Denys swore to that. And swore what he would do if he opened his mouth about it.
I won"t, he had said to Denys. he had said to Denys. G.o.d, do you think I want her into that tape? G.o.d, do you think I want her into that tape?
She hasn"t got it, Denys had a.s.sured him. Denys had a.s.sured him. And won"t get it. And won"t get it.
Yet-had been his thought.
There was nothing but worry in the look Ari gave him.
"It"s not easy," he said, "to be under suspicion-all the time. That"s the way I live, Ari. And I never did anything. I was seventeen when it happened."
"I know that," she said. "I"ll talk to Denys. I"ll make it so you can go visit when you like,"
It was everything he had hoped for. "Right now-" he said, "there"s too much going on in the world. The mess in Novgorod. The same reason they have you flying with an escort. There"s a military base right next to Planys. The airport is in between the two. Your uncle Denys is worried they might try to grab my father; or me. I"m grounded until things settle down. I can"t even talk to him on the phone. -And Grant"s never even gotten to go. Grant-was like his second son."
"d.a.m.n," she said, "I"m sorry. But you will will get to see him. Grant, too. I"ll do everything I can." get to see him. Grant, too. I"ll do everything I can."
"I"d be grateful."
"Justin, -does your father hate me?"
"No. Absolutely not."
"What does he say about me?"
"We stay off that subject," he said. "You understand-every call I make to him, every second I spend with him-there"s always somebody listening. Talking about you-could land me back in Detention."
She looked at him a long time. Shock, no. But they had not told her that, maybe. There was a mix of expressions on her face he could not sort out.
"Your father"s a Special," she said. "Yanni says you ought to be."
"Yanni says. I doubt it. And they"re not even going to allow the question-because they can"t touch my father-legally-so they don"t want me me unreachable. You understand." unreachable. You understand."
That was another answer that bothered her. Another moment of silence.
"Someday," he said, "when things are quieter, someday when you"re running Reseune-I hope you"ll take another look at my father"s case. You could do something to help him. I don"t think anyone else ever will. Just-ask him-the things you"ve asked me." But, O G.o.d, the truth . . . about that tape; about Art; the shock of that-no knowing what that will do to her. But, O G.o.d, the truth . . . about that tape; about Art; the shock of that-no knowing what that will do to her.
She"s not not like her predecessor. She"s a decent kid. like her predecessor. She"s a decent kid.
That tape"s as much a rape of her-as me.
G.o.d, G.o.d, when"s she she going to get the thing? Two more years? going to get the thing? Two more years?
When she"s seventeen?
"Maybe I will," she said. "-Justin, why why did he do it?" did he do it?"
He shook his head, violently. "n.o.body knows. n.o.body really knows. Temper. G.o.d knows they didn"t get along."
"You"re his replicate."
He lost his breath a moment. And got caught looking her straight in the eyes.
"You don"t have a temper like that," she said. "Do you?"
"I"m not like you," he said. "I"m just his twin. Physical resemblance, that"s all."
"Did he fight with a lot of people?"
He tried to think what to say; and came up with: "No. But he and Ari had a lot of professional disagreements. Things that mattered to them. Personalities, mostly."
"Yanni says you"re awfully good."
He wobbled badly on that shift of ground and knew she had seen the relief. "Yanni"s very kind."
"Yanni"s a b.i.t.c.h," she laughed. "But I like him. -He says you work deep-set stuff."
He nodded. "Experimental." He was glad to talk about his work. Anything but the subject they had been on.
"He says your designs are really good. But the computers keep spitting out Field Too Large."
"They"ve done some other tests."
"I"d like you to teach me," she said.
"Ari, that"s kind of you, but I don"t think your uncle Denys would like that. I don"t don"t think they want me around you. I don"t think that"s ever going to change." think they want me around you. I don"t think that"s ever going to change."
"I want you to teach me," she said, "what you"re doing."
He found no quick answer then. And she waited without saying a thing.
"Ari, that"s my my work. You know there is a little personal vanity involved here-" Truth, he was disturbed; cornered; and the child was innocent in it, he thought, completely. "Ari, I"ve had little enough I"ve really done in my hie; I"d at least like to do the first write-up on it, before it gets sucked up into someone else"s work. If it"s worth anything. You know there work. You know there is a little personal vanity involved here-" Truth, he was disturbed; cornered; and the child was innocent in it, he thought, completely. "Ari, I"ve had little enough I"ve really done in my hie; I"d at least like to do the first write-up on it, before it gets sucked up into someone else"s work. If it"s worth anything. You know there is is such a thing as professional jealousy. And you"ll do so much in your life. Leave me my little corner." such a thing as professional jealousy. And you"ll do so much in your life. Leave me my little corner."
She looked put off by that. A line appeared between her brows. "I wouldn"t steal from you."
He made it light, a little laugh, grim as it was. "You know what we"re doing. Arguing like the first Ari and my father. Over the same d.a.m.n thing. You"re trying to be nice. I know that-"
"I"m not trying to be nice. I"m asking you."
"Look, Ari, -"
"I won"t steal your stuff. I don"t care care who writes it up. I just want you to show me what you do and how you do it." who writes it up. I just want you to show me what you do and how you do it."
He sat back. It was a corner she backed him into, a d.a.m.ned, petulant child used to having her way in the world. "Ari, -"
"I need need it, dammit!" it, dammit!"
"You don"t get get everything you need in this world." everything you need in this world."
"You"re saying I"d steal from you!"
"I"m not saying you"d steal. I"m saying I"ve got a few rights, Ari, few as they are in this place-maybe I want my name on it. And And my father"s. If just because it"s the same last name." my father"s. If just because it"s the same last name."
That stopped her. She thought about it, staring at him.
"I can figure that," she said. "I can fix can fix that. I promise you. I won"t take anything you don"t want me to. that. I promise you. I won"t take anything you don"t want me to. I don"t lie, I don"t lie, Justin. I don"t tell lies. Not to my friends. Not in important things. I want to learn. I want you to teach me. n.o.body in the House is going to keep me from having any teacher I want. And it"s you." Justin. I don"t tell lies. Not to my friends. Not in important things. I want to learn. I want you to teach me. n.o.body in the House is going to keep me from having any teacher I want. And it"s you."
"You know-if you get me in trouble, Ari, you know what it can do."
"You"re not going to get in any trouble. I"m a wing supervisor. Even if I haven"t got a wing to work in. So I can make my own, can"t I? You. And Grant."
His heart went to long, painful beats. "I"d rather not be transferred."
She shook her head. "Not really move. move. I"ve got a Wing One office. It"s just paper stuff. It just means my staff does your paperwork. -I"m sorry." When he said nothing in her pause: "I I"ve got a Wing One office. It"s just paper stuff. It just means my staff does your paperwork. -I"m sorry." When he said nothing in her pause: "I did did it." it."
"d.a.m.n it, Ari-" it, Ari-"
"It"s just paperwork. And 1 And 1 don"t like having stuff I"m working on lying around your office. -I can change it back, if you like." don"t like having stuff I"m working on lying around your office. -I can change it back, if you like."
"I"d rather." He leaned his arms on his knees, looking her in the eye. "Ari, -I told you. I"ve got little enough in my life. I"d like to hang on to my independence. If you don"t mind."
"They"re bugging your apartment. You know that."
"I figured they might be."
"If you"re in my wing, I can re-route the Security stuff so I get it, same as uncle Denys."
"I don"t want want it, Ari." it, Ari."
She gave him a worried, slightly hurt look. "Will you teach me?"
"All right," he said. Because there was no way out of it.
"You don"t sound happy."
"I don"t know, Ari."
She reached out and squeezed his hand. "Friends. All right? Friends?"
He squeezed hers. And tried to believe it.
"They"ll probably arrest me when I get back to the House."
"No, they won"t." She drew her hand back. "Come on. We"ll all walk up together. I"ve I"ve got to get a shower before I go anywhere. But you can tell me what you"re working on." got to get a shower before I go anywhere. But you can tell me what you"re working on."
x They parted company at the quadrangle. He walked on, heart racing as he walked toward the Wing One doors, where the guard always stood, where-quite likely, the guard was getting an advis.e.m.e.nt over the pocket-corn; or sending one and getting orders back.
He had seen enough of Security"s inner rooms.
He walked through the door, looked at the guard eye to eye-offering no threat, trying without saying a thing to communicate that he was not going to be a problem: he had had enough in his life of being slammed face-about against walls.
"Good day, ser," the guard said, and his heart did a skip-beat. "Good day," he said, and walked on through the small foyer into the hall, all the way to the lift, all the time he was standing there expecting to get a sharp order from behind him, still expecting it all the way down the hall upstairs. But he got as far as his office, and Grant was there, unarrested, looking worried and frayed at the edges.
"It"s all right," he said, to relieve the worst of Grant"s fears. "Went pretty well. A lot better than it could have." He sat down, drew a breath or two. "She"s asked me to teach her."
Grant did not react overmuch. He shrugged finally. "Denys will put the quietus on that."
"No. I don"t know what what in h.e.l.l it is. She got us transferred. I," he said as Grant showed alarm, "got us transferred in h.e.l.l it is. She got us transferred. I," he said as Grant showed alarm, "got us transferred back back to Yanni"s wing. But right now-and until she gets it straight with Security-we"re not Wing One. That"s how serious it is-if she"s telling the truth; and I haven"t a reason in the world to doubt it. She to Yanni"s wing. But right now-and until she gets it straight with Security-we"re not Wing One. That"s how serious it is-if she"s telling the truth; and I haven"t a reason in the world to doubt it. She wants wants me to work with her. She"s been talking with Yanni about my work, Yanni told her-d.a.m.n him-he thinks I"m on some kind of important track, and young sera me to work with her. She"s been talking with Yanni about my work, Yanni told her-d.a.m.n him-he thinks I"m on some kind of important track, and young sera wants wants what I know, wants me to show her everything I"m working on." what I know, wants me to show her everything I"m working on."
Grant exhaled a long, slow breath.
"So, well-" Justin swung the chair around, reached for his coffee cup and got up to fill it from the pot. "That"s the story. If Security doesn"t come storming in here- You want a cup?"
"Thanks. -Sit down, let me get it."
"I"ve got it." He retrieved Grant"s cup and gave him the rest of the pot and a little of his own. "Here." He handed Grant the cup. "Anyway, she was reasonable. She was-"
Not quite the little kid anymore.
But he didn"t say that. He said: "-quite reasonable. Concerned." And then remembered with a flood of panic: We"re in her administration at the moment; if there"s monitoring going on, it"s not routed just to Denys, it"s going straight to her. My G.o.d, what have we said?
"We"ll be under her security for a little while," he said with that little Remember the eavesdroppers sign, and Grant"s eyes followed that move.
Trying to remember what he had said, too, he imagined, and to figure out how a young and very dangerous CIT could interpret it.
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