"Sure," he said immediately. "Name it."
"I need you to get a message to Christian Ozera."
His eagerness faltered. "What the-? You aren"t serious."
"Yes. Completely."
"Rose...I can"t talk to him. You know that."
"I thought you said you"d help. I thought you said helping "damsels" is the honorable thing to do."
"I don"t really see how honor"s involved here." I gave him the most smoldering look I could manage. He caved. "What do you want me to tell him?" "Tell him I need St. Vladimir"s books. The ones in storage. He needs to sneak them to me soon.
Tell him it"s for Lissa. And tell him...tell him I lied the night of the reception." I hesitated. "Tell him I"m sorry."
"That doesn"t make any sense."
"It doesn"t have to. Just do it. Please?" I turned on the beauty queen smile again.
With hasty a.s.surances that he"d see what he could do, he left for lunch, and I went off to practice.
Fifteen
MASON DELIVERED.
He found me the next day before school. He was carrying a box of books.
"I got them," he said. "Hurry and take them before you get in trouble for talking to me."
He handed them over, and I grunted. They were heavy. "Christian gave you these?"
"Yeah. Managed to talk to him without anyone noticing. He"s got kind of an att.i.tude, did you ever notice that?"
"Yeah, I noticed." I rewarded Mason with a smile that he ate up. "Thanks. This means a lot."
I hauled the loot up to my room, fully aware of how weird it was that someone who hated to study as much as I did was about to get buried in dusty c.r.a.p from the fourteenth century. When I opened the first book, though, I saw that these must be reprints of reprints of reprints, probably because anything that old would have long since fallen apart.
Sifting through the books, I discovered they fell into three categories: books written by people after St. Vladimir had died, books written by other people when he was still alive, and one diary of sorts written by him. What had Mason said about primary and secondary sources? Those last two groups were the ones I wanted.
Whoever had reprinted these had reworded the books enough so that I didn"t have to read Ye Olde English or anything. Or rather, Russian, I supposed. St. Vladimir had lived in the old country.
Today I healed the mother of Sava who has long since suffered from sharp pains within her stomach. Her malady is now gone, but G.o.d has not allowed me to do such a thing lightly. I am weak and dizzy, and the madness is trying to leak into my head. I thank G.o.d every day for shadow-kissed Anna, for without her, I would surely not be able to endure.
Anna again. And "shadow-kissed." He talked about her a lot, among other things. Most of the time he wrote long sermons, just like what I"d hear in church. Super boring. But other times, the book read just like a diary, recapping what he did each day. And if it really wasn"t just a load of c.r.a.p, he healed all the time. Sick people. Injured people. Even plants. He brought dead crops back to life when people were starving. Sometimes he would make flowers bloom just for the h.e.l.l of it.
Reading on, I found out that it was a good thing old Vlad had Anna around, because he was pretty messed up. The more he used his powers, the more they started to get to him. He"d get irrationally angry and sad. He blamed it on demons and stupid stuff like that, but it was obvious he suffered from depression. Once, he admitted in his diary, he tried to kill himself. Anna stopped him.
Later, browsing through the book written by the guy who knew Vladimir, I read:
And many think it miraculous too, the power the blessed Vladimir shows over others. Moroi and dhampirs flock to him and listen to his words, happy just to be near him. Some say it is madness that touches him and not spirit, but most adore him and would do anything he asked.
Such is the way G.o.d marks his favorites, and if such moments are followed by hallucinations and despair, it is a small sacrifice for the amount of good and leadership he can show among the people.
It sounded a lot like what the priest had said, but I sensed more than just a "winning personality" People adored him, would do anything he asked. Yes, Vladimir had used compulsion on his followers, I was certain. A lot of Moroi had in those days, before it was banned, but they didn"t use it on Moroi or dhampirs. They couldn"t. Only Lissa could.
I shut the book and leaned back against my bed. Vladimir healed plants and animals. He could use compulsion on a ma.s.sive scale. And by all accounts, using those sorts of powers had made him crazy and depressed.
Added into it all, making it that much weirder was that everyone kept describing his guardian as "shadow-kissed." That expression had bugged me ever since I first heard it....
"You"re shadow-kissed! You have to take care of her!"
Ms. Karp had shouted those words at me, her hands clenching my shirt and jerking me toward her. It had happened on a night two years ago when I"d been inside the main part of the upper school to return a book. It was nearly past curfew, and the halls were empty. I"d heard a loud commotion, and then Ms. Karp had come tearing around the corner, looking frantic and wild- eyed.
She shoved me into a wall, still gripping me. "Do you understand?"
I knew enough self-defense that I could have probably pushed her away, but my shock kept me frozen. "No."
"They"re coming for me. They"ll come for her."
"Who?"
"Lissa. You have to protect her. The more she uses it, the worse it"ll get. Stop her, Rose. Stop her before they notice, before they notice and take her away too. Get her out of here."
"I...what do you mean? Get her out of...you mean the Academy?" "Yes! You have to leave. You"re bound. It"s up to you. Take her away from this place."
Her words were crazy. No one left the Academy. Yet as she held me there and stared into my eyes, I began to feel strange. A fuzzy feeling clouded my mind. What she said suddenly sounded very reasonable, like the most reasonable thing in the world. Yes. I needed to take Lissa away, take her- Feet pounded in the hallway, and a group of guardians rounded the corner. I didn"t recognize them; they weren"t from the school. They pried her off of me, restraining her wild thrashing.
Someone asked me if I was okay, but I could only keep staring at Ms. Karp.
"Don"t let her use the power!" she screamed. "Save her. Save her from herself!"
The guardians had later explained to me that she wasn"t well and had been taken to a place where she could recover. She would be safe and cared for, they a.s.sured me. She would recover.
Only she hadn"t.
Back in the present, I stared at the books and tried to put it all together. Lissa. Ms. Karp. St.
Vladimir.
What was I supposed to do?
Someone rapped at my door, and I jerked out of my memories. No one had visited me, not even staff, since my suspension. When I opened the door, I saw Mason in the hall.
"Twice in one day?" I asked. "And how"d you even get up here?"
He flashed his easy smile. "Someone put a lit match in one of the bathroom"s garbage cans.
d.a.m.n shame. The staff"s kind of busy. Come on, I"m springing you."
I shook my head. Setting fires was apparently a new sign of affection. Christian had done it and now Mason. "Sorry, no saving me tonight. If I get caught-" "Lissa"s orders."
I shut up and let him smuggle me out of the building. He took me over to the Moroi dorm and miraculously got me in and up to her room unseen. I wondered if there was a distracting bathroom fire in this building too.
Inside her room, I found a party in full swing. Lissa, Camille, Carly, Aaron, and a few other royals sat around laughing, listening to loud music, and pa.s.sing around bottles of whiskey. No Mia, no Jesse. Natalie, I noticed a few moments later, sat apart from the group, clearly unsure how to act around all of them. Her awkwardness was totally obvious.
Lissa stumbled to her feet, the fuzzy feelings in our bond indicating she"d been drinking for a while. "Rose!" She turned to Mason with a dazzling smile. "You delivered."
He swept her an over-the-top bow. "I"m at your command."
I hoped he"d done it for the thrill of it and not because of any compulsion. Lissa slung an arm around my waist and pulled me down with the others. "Join the festivities."
"What are we celebrating?"
"I don"t know. Your escape tonight?"
A few of the others held up plastic cups, cheering and toasting me. Xander Badica poured two more cups, handing them to Mason and me. I took mine with a smile, all the while feeling uneasy about the night"s turn of events. Not so long ago, I would have welcomed a party like this and would have downed my drink in thirty seconds. Too much bothered me this time, though. Like the fact that the royals were treating Lissa like a G.o.ddess. Like how none of them seemed to remember that I had been accused of being a blood wh.o.r.e.
Like how Lissa was completely unhappy despite her smiles and laughter.
"Where"d you get the whiskey?" I asked.
"Mr. Nagy," Aaron said. He sat very close to Lissa. Everyone knew Mr. Nagy drank all the time after school and kept a stash on campus. He continually used new hiding places-and students continually found them.
Lissa leaned against Aaron"s shoulder. "Aaron helped me break into his room and take them. He had them hidden in the bottom of the paint closet."
The others laughed, and Aaron gazed at her with complete and utter worship. Amusingly, I realized she hadn"t had to use any compulsion on him. He was just that crazy for her. He always had been.
"Why aren"t you drinking?" Mason asked me a little while later, speaking quietly into my ear.
I glanced down at my cup, half surprised to see it full. "I don"t know. I guess I don"t think guardians should drink around their charges."
"She"s not your charge yet! You aren"t on duty. You won"t be for a long time. Since when did you get so responsible?"
I didn"t really think I was all that responsible. But I was thinking about what Dimitri had said about balancing fun and obligation. It just seemed wrong to let myself go wild when Lissa was in such a vulnerable state lately. Wiggling out of my tight spot between her and Mason, I walked over and sat beside Natalie.
"Hey Nat, you"re quiet tonight."
She held a cup as full as mine. "So are you."
I laughed softly. "I guess so."
She tilted her head, watching Mason and the royals like they were some sort of science experiment. They"d consumed a lot more whiskey since I"d arrived, and the silliness had shot up considerably. "Weird, huh? You used to be the center of attention. Now she is."
I blinked in surprise. I hadn"t considered it like that. "I guess so."
"Hey, Rose," said Xander, nearly spilling his drink as he walked over to me. "What was it like?" "What was what like?"
"Letting someone feed off you?"
The others fell quiet, a sort of antic.i.p.ation settling over them.
"She didn"t do that," said Lissa in a warning voice. "I told you."
"Yeah, yeah, I know nothing happened with Jesse and Ralf. But you guys did it, right? While you were gone?"
"Let it go," said Lissa. Compulsion worked best with direct eye contact, and his attention was focused on me, not her.
"I mean, it"s cool and everything. You guys did what you had to do, right? It"s not like you"re a feeder. I just want to know what it was like. Danielle Szelsky let me bite her once. She said it didn"t feel like anything."
There was a collective "ew" from among the girls. s.e.x and blood with dhampirs was dirty; between Moroi, it was cannibalistic.
"You are such a liar," said Camille.
"No, I"m serious. It was just a small bite. She didn"t get high like the feeders. Did you?" He put his free arm around my shoulder. "Did you like it?"
Lissa"s face went still and pale. Alcohol muted the full force of her feelings, but I could read enough to know how she felt. Dark, scared thoughts trickled into me-underscored with anger.
She usually had a good grip on her temper-unlike me-but I"d seen it flare up before. Once it had happened at a party very similar to this one, just a few weeks after Ms. Karp had been taken away.
Greg Dashkov-a distant cousin of Natalie"s-had held the party in his room. His parents apparently knew someone who knew someone, because he had one of the biggest rooms in the dorm. He"d been friends with Lissa"s brother before the accident and had been more than happy to take Andre"s little sister into his social fold. Greg had also been happy to take me in, and the two of us had been all over each other that night. For a soph.o.m.ore like me, being with a royal Moroi senior was a huge rush.
I drank a lot that night but still managed to keep an eye on Lissa. She always wore an edge of anxiety around this many people, but no one really noticed, because she could interact with them so well. My heavy buzz kept a lot of her feelings from me, but as long as she looked okay, I didn"t worry.