Vice Versa

Chapter 20

"He had a rabbit he said he was keeping for me," explained little Porter: "and now he won"t give it up or tell me what he"s done with it."

"He has some mice he ought to give us, too," said one or two new-comers, edging their way to the front.

Mr. Bult.i.tude was of course exceedingly annoyed by this unlooked-for interruption, and still more by such utterly preposterous claims on him for animals; however, it was easy to explain that he had no such things in his possession, and after that of course no more could be said. He was beginning to disclaim all liability, when Siggers stopped him.

"Keep that for the present," he said. "I say, we ought to have a regular trial over this, and get at the truth of it properly. Let"s fetch him along to the goal-posts and judge him!"

He fixed upon the goal-posts as being somehow more formal, and, as his proposal was well received, two of them grasped Mr. Bult.i.tude by the collar and dragged him along in procession to the appointed spot between the two flags, while Siggers followed in what he conceived to be a highly judicial manner, and evidently enjoying himself prodigiously.

Paul, though highly indignant, allowed himself to be led along without resistance. It was safest to humour them, for after all it would not last long, and when they were tired of baiting him he could watch his time and slip quietly away.

When they reached the goal-posts Siggers arranged them in a circle, placing himself, the hapless Paul, and his accusers in the centre. "You chaps had better all be jurymen," he said. "I"ll be judge, and unless he makes a clean breast of it," he added with judicial impartiality, "the court will jolly well punch his ugly young head off."

Siggers" father was an Old Bailey barrister in good and rather sharp practice, so that it was clearly the son"s mission to preside on this occasion. But unfortunately his hour of office was doomed to be a brief one, for Mr. Blinkhorn, becoming aware that the game was being still more scantily supported, and noticing the crowd at the goal, came up to know the reason of it at a long camel-like trot, his hat on the back of his head, his mild face flushed with exertion, and his pebble gla.s.ses gleaming in the winter sunshine.

"What are you all doing here? Why don"t you join the game? I"ve come here to play football with you, and how can I do it if you all slink off and leave me to play by myself?" he asked with pathos.

"Please, sir," said Siggers, alarmed at the threatened loss of his dignity, "it"s a trial, and I"m judge."

"Yes, sir," the whole ring shouted together. "We"re trying Bult.i.tude, sir."

On the whole, perhaps, Mr. Bult.i.tude was glad of this interference. At least justice would be done now, although this usher had blundered so unpardonably that morning.

"This is childish, you know," said Mr. Blinkhorn, "and it"s not football. The Doctor will be seriously angry if he comes and sees you trifling here. Let the boy go."

"But he"s cheated some of the fellows, sir," grumbled Tipping and Siggers together.

"Well, _you_"ve no right to punish him if he has. Leave him to me."

"Will you see fair play between them, sir? He oughtn"t to be let off without being made to keep his word."

"If there is any dispute between you and Bult.i.tude," said Mr. Blinkhorn, "I have no objection to settle it--provided it is within my province."

"Settle it without me," said Paul hurriedly. "I"ve leave to go home. I"m ill."

"Who gave you leave to go home?" asked the master.

"That young man over there on the rails," said Paul.

"I am the proper person to apply to for leave; you know that well enough," said Mr. Blinkhorn, with a certain coldness in his tone. "Now then, Porter, what is all this business about?"

"Please, sir," said Porter, "he told me last term he had a lot of rabbits at home, and if I liked he would bring me back a lop-eared one and let me have it cheap, and I gave him two shillings, sir, and sixpence for a hutch to keep it in; and now he pretends he doesn"t know anything about it!"

To Paul"s horror two or three other boys came forward with much the same tale. He remembered now that during the holidays he had discovered that d.i.c.k was maintaining a sort of amateur menagerie in his bedroom, and that he had ordered the whole of the livestock to be got rid of or summarily destroyed.

Now it seemed that the wretched d.i.c.k had already disposed of it to these clamorous boys, and, what was worse, had stipulated with considerable forethought for payment in advance. For the first time he repented his paternal harshness. Like the netted lion, a paltry white mouse or two would have set him free; but, less happy than the beast in the fable, he had not one!

He tried to stammer out excuses. "It"s extremely unfortunate," he said, "but the fact is I"m not in a position to meet this--this sudden call upon me. Some other day, perhaps----"

"None of your long words, now," growled Tipping. (Boys hate long words as much as even a Sat.u.r.day Reviewer.) "Why haven"t you brought the rabbits?"

"Yes," said Mr. Blinkhorn. "Why, having promised to bring the rabbits with you, haven"t you kept your word? You must be able to give some explanation."

"Because," said Mr. Bult.i.tude, wriggling with embarra.s.sment, "I--that is my father--found out that my young rascal of a son--I mean his young rascal of a son (_me_, you know) was, contrary to my express orders, keeping a couple of abominable rabbits in his bedroom, and a quant.i.ty of filthy little white mice which he tried to train to climb up the banisters. And I kept finding the brutes running about my bath-room, and--well, of course, I put a stop to it; and--no, what am I saying?--my father, of course, he put a stop to it; and, in point of fact, had them all drowned in a pail of water."

It might be thought that he had an excellent opportunity here of avowing himself, but there was the risk that Mr. Blinkhorn would disbelieve him, and, with the boys, he felt that the truth would do anything but increase his popularity. But dissembling fails sometimes outside the copy-books, and Mr. Bult.i.tude"s rather blundering attempt at it only landed him in worse difficulties.

There was a yell of rage and disappointment from the defrauded ones, who had cherished a lingering hope that young Bult.i.tude had those rabbits somewhere, but (like Mr. Barkis and his wooden lemon) found himself unable to part with them when the time came to fulfil his contract. And as contempt is a frame of mind highly stimulating to one"s self-esteem, even those who had no personal interest in the matter joined in the execrations with hearty goodwill and sympathy.

"Why did you let him do it? They were ours, not his. What right had your governor to go and drown our rabbits, eh?" they cried wrathfully.

"What right?" said Paul. "Mustn"t a man do as he pleases in his own house, then? I--he was not obliged to see the house overrun with vermin, I suppose?"

But this only made them angrier, and they resented his defence with hoots, and groans, and hisses.

Mr. Blinkhorn meanwhile was pondering the affair conscientiously. At last he said, "But you know the Doctor would never allow animals to be kept in the school, if Bult.i.tude had brought them. The whole thing is against the rules, and I shall not interfere."

"Ah, but," said Chawner, "he promised them all to day-boarders. The Doctor couldn"t object to that, could he, sir?"

"True," said Mr. Blinkhorn, "true. I was not aware of that. Well then, Bult.i.tude, since you are prevented from performing what you promised to do, I"m sure you won"t object to do what is fair and right in the matter?"

"I don"t think I quite follow you," said Mr. Bult.i.tude. But he dreaded what was coming next.

"It"s very simple. You have taken money from these boys, and if you can"t give them value for it, you ought to return all you took from them. I"m sure you see that yourself."

"I don"t admit that I owe them anything," said Paul; "and at all events it is highly inconvenient to pay them now."

"If your own sense of honour isn"t enough," said Mr. Blinkhorn, "I must take the matter into my own hands. Let every boy who has any claim upon him tell me exactly what it is."

One boy after another brought forward his claim. One had entrusted d.i.c.k, it appeared, with a shilling, for which he was to receive a mouse with a "plum saddle," and two others had invested ninepence each in white mice.

With Porter"s half-crown, the total came to precisely five shillings--all Paul had in the world, the one rope by which he could ever hope to haul himself up to his lost pinnacle!

Mr. Blinkhorn, naturally enough, saw no reason why the money, being clearly due, should not be paid at once. "Give me any money you have about you, Bult.i.tude," he said, "and I"ll satisfy your debts with it, as far as it goes."

Paul clasped his arm convulsively. "No!" he cried hoa.r.s.ely, "not that!

Don"t make me do that! I--I can"t pay them--not now. They don"t understand. If they only give me time they shall have double their money back--waggon-loads of rabbits, the best rabbits money can buy--if they"ll wait. Tell them to wait. My dear sir, don"t see me wronged! I won"t pay now!"

"They have waited long enough," said Mr. Blinkhorn; "you must pay them."

"I tell you I won"t!" cried Paul; "do you hear? Not one sixpence. Oh, if you knew! That infernal Garuda Stone! What fools people are!"

Then in his despair he did the most fatal thing possible. He tried to save himself by flight, and with a violent plunge broke through the circle and made for the road which led towards the station.

Instantly the whole school, only too glad of the excitement, was at his heels. The unhappy Colonial Produce merchant ran as he had not run for a quarter of a century, faster even than he had on his first experience of Coggs" and c.o.ker"s society on that memorable Monday night. But in spite of his efforts the chase was a short one. Chawner and Tipping very soon had him by the collar, and brought him back, struggling and kicking out viciously, to Mr. Blinkhorn, whose good opinion he had now lost for ever.

"Please, sir," said Chawner, "I can feel something like a purse in his pocket. Shall I take it out, sir?"

"As he refuses to act with common honesty--yes," said Mr. Blinkhorn.

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