Meanwhile she dallied with him, and amused herself with the younger men.
Her old uncle fell ill in the spring, and could scarcely leave the house. She declared that she found life in the valley intolerably dull, that she hated the quiet of the place, that she longed for Leeds, and the exciting bustle of the streets; and in the evenings she wrote long letters to the girl-friends she had left behind there, describing with petulant vivacity her tribe of rustic admirers. At the harvest-time she went back on a fortnight"s visit to friends; the evening before her departure she promised Anthony to give him her answer on her return.
But, instead, she avoided him, pretended to have promised in jest, and took up with Luke Stock, a cattle-dealer from Wigton.
V
It was three weeks since he had fetched his flock down from the fell.
After dinner he and his mother sat together in the parlour: they had done so every Sunday afternoon, year in and year out, as far back as he could remember.
A row of mahogany chairs, with shiny, horse-hair seats, were ranged round the room. A great collection of agricultural prize-tickets were pinned over the wall; and, on a heavy, highly-polished sideboard stood several silver cups. A heap of gilt-edged shavings filled the unused grate: there were gaudily-tinted roses along the mantelpiece, and, on a small table by the window, beneath a gla.s.s-case, a gilt basket filled with imitation flowers. Every object was disposed with a scrupulous precision: the carpet and the red-patterned cloth on the centre table were much faded. The room was spotlessly clean, and wore, in the chilly winter sunlight, a rigid, comfortless air.
Neither spoke, or appeared conscious of the other"s presence. Old Mrs.
Garstin, wrapped in a woollen shawl, sat knitting: Anthony dozed fitfully on a stiff-backed chair.
Of a sudden, in the distance, a bell started tolling. Anthony rubbed his eyes drowsily, and taking from the table his Sunday hat, strolled out across the dusky fields. Presently, reaching a rude wooden seat, built beside the bridle-path, he sat down and relit his pipe. The air was very still; below him a white filmy mist hung across the valley: the fell-sides, vaguely grouped, resembled hulking ma.s.ses of sombre shadow; and, as he looked back, three squares of glimmering gold revealed the lighted windows of the square-towered church.
He sat smoking; pondering, with placid and reverential contemplation, on the Mighty Maker of the world--a world majestically and inevitably ordered; a world where, he argued, each object--each fissure in the fells, the winding course of each tumbling stream--possesses its mysterious purport, its inevitable signification....
At the end of the field two rams were fighting; retreating, then running together, and, leaping from the ground, b.u.t.ting head to head and horn to horn. Anthony watched them absently, pursuing his rude meditations.
... And the succession of bad seasons, the slow ruination of the farmers throughout the country, were but punishment meted out for the acc.u.mulated wickedness of the world. In the olden time G.o.d rained plagues upon the land: nowadays, in His wrath, He spoiled the produce of the earth, which, with His own hands, He had fashioned and bestowed upon men.
He rose and continued his walk along the bridle-path. A mult.i.tude of rabbits scuttled up the hill at his approach; and a great cloud of plovers, rising from the rushes, circled overhead, filling the air with a profusion of their querulous cries. All at once he heard a rattling of stones, and perceived a number of small pieces of shingle bounding in front of him down the gra.s.sy slope.
A woman"s figure was moving among the rocks above him. The next moment, by the tr.i.m.m.i.n.g of crimson velvet on her hat, he had recognized her. He mounted the slope with springing strides, wondering the while how it was she came to be there, that she was not in church playing the organ at afternoon service.
Before she was aware of his approach, he was beside her.
"I thought ye"d be in church--" he began.
She started: then, gradually regaining her composure, answered, weakly smiling:
"Mr. Jenkinson, the new schoolmaster, wanted to try the organ."
He came towards her impulsively: she saw the odd flickers in his eyes as she stepped back in dismay.
"Nay, but I will na harm ye," he said. "Only I reckon what "tis a special turn o" Providence, meetin" wi" ye oop here. I reckon what ye"ll hev t" give me a square answer noo. Ye canna dilly-dally everlastingly."
He spoke almost brutally; and she stood, white and gasping, staring at him with large, frightened eyes. The sheep-walk was but a tiny threadlike track: the slope of the shingle on either side was very steep: below them lay the valley; distant, lifeless, all blurred by the evening dusk. She looked about her helplessly for a means of escape.
"Miss Rosa," he continued, in a husky voice, "can ye na coom t" think on me? Think ye, I"ve bin waitin" nigh upon two year for ye. I"ve watched ye tak oop, first wi" this young fellar, and then wi" that, till soomtimes my heart"s fit t" burst. Many a day, oop on t" fell-top, t"
thought o" ye"s nigh driven me daft, and I"ve left my shepherdin" jest t" set on a cairn in t" mist, picturin" an" broodin" on yer face. Many an evenin" I"ve started oop t" vicarage, wi" t" resolution t" speak right oot t" ye; but when it coomed t" point, a sort o" timidity seemed t" hould me back, I was that feared t" displease ye. I knaw I"m na scholar, an" mabbe ye think I"m rough-mannered. I knaw I"ve spoken sharply to ye once or twice lately. But it"s jest because I"m that mad wi" love for ye: I jest canna help myself soomtimes--"
He waited, peering into her face. She could see the beads of sweat above his bristling eyebrows: the damp had settled on his sandy beard: his h.o.r.n.y fingers were twitching at the b.u.t.tons of his black Sunday coat.
She struggled to summon a smile; but her under-lip quivered, and her large dark eyes filled slowly with tears.
And he went on:
"Ye"ve coom t" mean jest everything to me. Ef ye will na hev me, I care for nought else. I canna speak t" ye in phrases: I"m jest a plain, unscholarly man: I canna wheedle ye, wi" cunnin" after t" fashion o"
toon folks. But I can love ye wi" all my might, an" watch over ye, and work for ye better than any one o" em--"
She was crying to herself, silently, while he spoke. He noticed nothing, however: the twilight hid her face from him.
"There"s nought against me," he persisted. "I"m as good a man as any one on "em. Ay, as good a man as any one on "em," he repeated defiantly, raising his voice.
"It"s impossible, Mr. Garstin, it"s impossible. Ye"ve been very kind to me--" she added, in a choking voice.
"Wa dang it, I didna mean t" mak ye cry, la.s.s," he exclaimed, with a softening of his tone. "There"s nought for ye t" cry ower."
She sank on to the stones, pa.s.sionately sobbing in hysterical and defenceless despair. Anthony stood a moment, gazing at her in clumsy perplexity: then, coming close to her, put his hand on her shoulder, and said gently:
"Coom, la.s.s, what"s trouble? Ye can trust me."
She shook her head faintly.
"Ay, but ye can though," he a.s.serted, firmly. "Come, what is"t?"
Heedless of him, she continued to rock herself to and fro, crooning in her distress:
"Oh! I wish I were dead!... I wish I could die!"
--"Wish ye could die?" he repeated. "Why, whatever can"t be that"s troublin" ye like this? There, there, la.s.sie, give ower: it "ull all coom right, whatever it be--"
"No, no," she wailed. "I wish I could die!... I wish I could die!"
Lights were twinkling in the village below; and across the valley darkness was draping the hills. The girl lifted her face from her hands, and looked up at him with a scared, bewildered expression.
"I must go home: I must be getting home," she muttered.
"Nay, but there"s sommut mighty amiss wi" ye."
"No, it"s nothing... I don"t know--I"m not well... I mean it"s nothing... it"ll pa.s.s over... you mustn"t think anything of it."
"Nay, but I canna stand by an see ye in sich trouble."
"It"s nothing, Mr. Garstin, indeed it"s nothing," she repeated.
"Ay, but I canna credit that," he objected stubbornly.
She sent him a shifting, hunted glance.
"Let me get home... you must let me get home."
She made a tremulous, pitiful attempt at firmness. Eyeing her keenly, he barred her path: she flushed scarlet, and looked hastily away across the valley.
"If ye"ll tell me yer distress, mabbe I can help ye."