Violet Evergarden

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Translator Note: Here’s a warning beforehand to avoid confusion– this chapter was written with POV switch for some reason. The narration swings from first to third person within every one or two chapter intervals. I honestly thought about translating it all in third person, but that felt like lying to the readers, so I left it as it is in the original work.

The DemiG.o.d and the Auto-Memories Doll

On thatday, the sky was overcast since morning, white clouds blending with pitchdarkness. Rain struck the land as the Sun set, thunders rumbling, in a weatherstormy enough to shake even windows protected by iron bars.

“It’sbecome cold, hasn’t it?”

Although itwas the beginning of autumn, the temperature had still been warm as of late.Perhaps due to it abruptly going down, the nun whom I had been readingscriptures aloud with stood up and started preparing the fireplace that hadbeen unused since spring.

I droppedmy gaze to the scriptures we were halfway through with, and then scanned theroom. A bed with a canopy. A gold-frame painting of mythological G.o.ds. An antiquemirror stand. A deep shadow was cast over all of them. The atmosphere was somewhatgrim.

“Hey…” Asstaying silent was dreadful, I tried calling out to the nun, yet wasinterrupted by a booming thunder. The sound was deafening enough to crack the soil.It sent chills through my entire body from within the silk robes I wore.

Thenavy-blue fabrics with golden embroidery of said robes were suitable for theausterity of a G.o.d’s child, but did not match me. The same went for the circletof the Sun being enveloped by the Moon that rested on my head, that room,everything…

I stood upfrom my chair and walked to the nun’s side.

“Everythingis fine, Lady Lux. This region has always been often hit by lightning, so thereare lightning rods installed around the Utopia. Besides, even if it were tostrike us, nothing would happen to you, Lady Lux. Your honorable body will besafe until the Day of Guidance four days from now.”

At thewords that came with a light smile, I could only laugh bitterly. That wasbecause I was unable to deem them either good or bad, as they were simplyneutral words of comfort.

“Excuseme.” the voice of another nun came from outside the room. It was most likelythe one in charge of the administrative management and security of the Utopia.

“Isanything the matter, Lisbon?”

“This raincaused the nearby river to flood. Crossing the bridge over to the harbor sidein these circ.u.mstances is unmanageable…”

“We havestored enough supplies to survive through even the winter. There should be noissues, right?”

“No, it isnot that… Since the crossing has become impossible, a traveler who waswandering this land has come seeking shelter in this Utopia. She asked if she couldstay until the storm calmed… There is no way we could treat a lost child withdisdain. It was all right to welcome her into the gates, but… thattraveler…”

Seeing asthe eyes of the reporting nun shone in delight, I concluded that something hadhappened. “Is she a ‘demiG.o.d’ like me?” after asking, my heart started racingfrom fear mixed with joy and sorrow mixed with antic.i.p.ation, so violently thatit ached.

“We havenot conducted any probation, so I cannot affirm it, but… her figure is thesplitting image of the G.o.ddess of combat, Garnet Spear. She is exactly asdescribed in the scriptures.”

“Rainy daysare ominous, so isn’t someone that comes by in times like these a mere humaninstead of a ‘demiG.o.d’? I believe I should recommend she departs to the lowerworld immediately after the tempest settles.”

My voicemight have been stiff. Although I was praised and worshipped as a ‘demiG.o.d’ inthat utopia, I did not have communication skills. However, I thought I had todo what I could for the sake of that traveler.

The twonuns looked at one another.

“Eitherway, let’s welcome the traveler. She must be freezing in this rain.”

“I-I wantto meet this person as well.”

“We’ll letyou greet her after you arrange yourself. Please, Lady Lux, be at ease.”

With that,the nuns left me in the room and took their leave in a haste. As the door waslatched, it did not budge even as I pushed it.

“Hey, openup. Isn’t there anyone here?”

I could nothear the sounds of people in the corridors. I sighed grievously. As I hadnothing else to do, I took a peek at the window. I did not have a panoramicview due to the window bars, but I could perfectly see the front gates.

“Ah.” Myeyes reflected the figure of a traveler standing outside without any rain gear.

There was afair distance from the room I was in to the ground. I kept observing her warilywhile believing that there was no way she would perceive my stare, yet shepromptly moved her neck to look straight at me. It seemed my breathing wouldstop. The fact that my gaze had been noticed was frightening, but more than anything,the reason was that I could tell, even from far away, that the beauty of thattraveler was a gift from G.o.d.

That wasthe first meeting between I, Lux Sibyl, and Violet Evergarden.

Thatisolated island contained something mysterious. The name of said islandsurrounded by sea and separated from other continents was Chevalier. There wereabout a hundred islanders in it.

As it was,the island was blessed with natural resources, and there was no contact withthe outside world except for pa.s.sing ships. The main characteristics ofChevalier were the waterfalls and ponds found throughout its territory. And amongthem, the most prominent was the great waterfall on the peak of an abysmal mountainin the center of the island. The maximum drop distance was of about a hundredmeters, and there was no one who could float up if swallowed by the plungebasin.

Aside from thegreat waterfall, there was one more peculiarity in the island of water andgreenery named Chevalier: a bizarre fortress erected by stacking irregularstones on top of one another. It was said that such spire devoid of uniformity,which artistic architecture had been created with the intention of not beinglabeled as either Oriental or Occidental, had suddenly started being built by alunatic. In reality, no one knew whether that was true or not. Until a few decadesbefore, it was a secretive building, left untouched as it was. One day, after agroup that had purchased a corner of the island suddenly migrated to it at once,the community already living in that island started calling them “Cult House”, whilethe fortress’s inhabitants themselves called it “Utopia”.

SisterLisbon, who had received the task of guiding the traveler that had wanderedinto the Utopia, was fixatedly staring at the entrance of a s.p.a.cious porch thatserved as the Utopia’s front gate. What she was observing was not the state ofthe storm outside but the female traveler as she undid her slovenly hair. Its goldenstrands were glossy from absorbing rainwater. Her complex braids delated its reallength.

In her handscovered by black gloves was a heavy-looking trolley bag. Under the Prussian-bluejacket that she took off was a snow-white ribbon-tie dress. Perhaps due tobeing so wet, it stuck to her bodyline perfectly, and even those of the sames.e.x would have trouble averting their eyes from the sight.

The womanwas a beautiful person with a somber gaze, and her figure, softly wet from therain, happened to look as pure and l.u.s.trous as a fairy. However, she wasenveloped in a somewhat outlandish atmosphere. Despite her fragile appearance, abottomless, raw strength was present somewhere within her.

“I will bein your care.” Although the woman’s voice was by no means loud, in such a quietplace, it resounded more exquisitely than it usually would.

Lisbon ledthe woman to a room used whenever there were visitors. She sat on said room’ssofa by a marble table. Maybe because of the current season, or because buildingwas made of stones, the air in the room felt cold.

“I am theadministrator of the management of this ‘Utopia’. My name is Lisbon. We of Utopiawelcome you, who were once lost.”

The outercorner of her eyes full of wrinkles and creases, Lisbon was clad in black robesalong with a white wimple, which was what everyone of that place used as hood. Itwas a default nun outfit that often could be found anywhere in the world. Exceptthe clothing of the Utopia’s nuns had the crest of a serpent being skewed by alarge sword embroidered in the chest area.

“Pleased tomake your acquaintance. My name is Violet Evergarden. I am grateful for thisfavor. As soon as crossing the bridge becomes possible, I shall take my leave.”

AlthoughViolet had not said the word ‘cold’ even once, her skin was clearly blue. Beingconsiderate, Lisbon put more firewood into the fireplace.

“Thank youvery much. May I dry my bag?”

There wereprobably very important things in it for her to prioritize it over her ownclothes. When opening the bag, Violet took out a book wrapped in several clothsand handkerchiefs. Upon a closer look, it seemed to be a book-shaped accessorycase. There were letters inside it. A sigh leaked from Violet’s lips.

“Are theseimportant letters?” Lisbon asked, and Violet choppily spoke about hercirc.u.mstances.

She was an Auto-MemoriesDoll, and had come to the island on request. The work had already been done. Alongwith writing the customer’s letter, she had also accepted to deliver it, andthough all she had to do was meet with the postman to entrust the letter tohim, she had been caught by the storm.

“So you arefrom a postal agency. Our Utopia is an ally of people, no matter who they are.Now, it is all right for you to dry your bag, but should you not warm up yourbody as well?”

As a whitetowel that had been prepared for her was placed over her head, Violet lookedlike a bride with a veil. Once she was given nun clothes as a replacement and finishedchanging into them, she was finally soothed into a state of being able to talkin detail.

Lisbon resumedthe conversation simply, “Since we have become acquainted, let me talk about usas well. We of Utopia are an organization that reverences every G.o.d whose name iscited in worldwide mythology.”

The vigorof the rain outside seemed to increase, and a thunder could be heard in thedistance.

“The mainpurpose of Utopia’s activities is to further the diffusion and worshipping ofworldwide mythology, and what we dedicate most of our strength to is the preservationof ‘demiG.o.ds’. Miss Violet, do you know about demiG.o.ds?”

Violetmutely shook her head.

For asecond, as if cutting the room in half, a flash of lightning filled it withwhite brightness and soon disappeared. At the intensity of the noise, Lisbonwound up putting herself on guard a little, but the Auto-Memories Doll in frontof her merely directed her eyes towards the window as if not seeing anythingout of ordinary. As seen from the side, her orbs twinkled. Lisbon coughed,making her gaze return to where it was before.

“A demiG.o.d isa child born between deity and a human. In our scriptures, there’s a famouslegend about a demiG.o.d. Love happened between a G.o.d and a person… look here.”Lisbon opened a huge, old and familiar book that had been left on the table. Itseemed to be one with many religious paintings. Turning over countless pages,she stopped at half of its length. “Let’s read the first section… ‘TheG.o.ddess of knowledge, Roses, descended from the Heavens to watch over thedevelopment of people’s civilization, and slipped onto the Earth in the form ofa young human woman. She could not afford to let her ident.i.ty ever bediscovered. However, when Roses was changing from her human form to her G.o.ddessone in order to go back to the skies, she was seen by a traveler. The man sworenot to reveal it to anyone, but asked to spend a night with Roses in return.Roses accepted that wish and returned to the Heavens at dawn, yet not even ayear pa.s.sed before she reappeared in front of the man. It was because theirchild, a demiG.o.d, had been born. Roses had a husband back in Heaven, andfearing his jealousy, she entrusted the child to the man. The demiG.o.d leftbehind inherited Roses’s rare intellectual power, but was murdered afterearning the envy of people who drowned in self-conceit and carried pomp to theextreme. Earnestly, Roses simply awaited for her child to pa.s.s by the gates thatled to both Heaven and the Underworld…’” Lisbon’s pale finger showed theill.u.s.tration on that page. “These heterochromatic eyes. One side is red, theother is golden… and long, lavender-grey hair, as if a single drop of purplehad been poured onto silver. This is the remarkable appearance of the G.o.ddessof knowledge, Roses. She’s said to have taught words to humanity when it had justbeen born.”

“Is thatthe beginning of demiG.o.ds?”

“It’s notjust this. Worldwide mythology is true, and demiG.o.ds are real as well. Thegreatest proof is the demiG.o.d of G.o.ddess Roses, Lady Lux, who lives in thisUtopia.”

By her ownexperience, Lisbon was used to rebuff and sneers when saying such things, butViolet did neither.

“Whycouldn’t Roses let humans know that she was a G.o.ddess?” she simply asked agenuine question that had come to her.

Lisbonsmiled satisfactorily. “Good point. Since the past, G.o.ds and beings thatpossessed the gift of preeminence were glorified by people and their existenceswere feared, but at the same time, they were objects of reliability. Moreover,the power of being glorified attracts envy. That was the case of Roses’s child.Other than in this legend, she left behind several other children of men.”After saying that, Lisbon turned the pages again. “However, the eventualresults of that were not positive… In reality, Roses was not supposed to letgo of her children. DemiG.o.ds are unique both in the Heavens and on Earth.However, in the world of humans, the power they inherit from the G.o.ds standsout. For their sake, it’s better for them to dwell in the Heavens. That is why,when we find a demiG.o.d, we hide and protect them from society. Until it comesthe day of returning them to Heaven… This is off-topic, but Miss Violet, wasyour name taken from the flower G.o.ddess Violet?”

“Yes, itseems so.” Perhaps because she recalled memories of the parent who had namedher, Violet averted her eyes.

“Still, asI thought… you really do keenly resemble the G.o.ddess of combat, GarnetSpear.” With a gentle sc.r.a.ping sound, Lisbon pushed the scripture in front ofViolet and opened it.

Displayed therewas a G.o.ddess in white armor holding a sword. With her golden hair flowingfree, she was staring into the distance. Her eyes were blue and stunning. Shedefinitely was very similar to Violet.

“This ill.u.s.trationis a religious portrait made by a famous painter, and it is said to be his bestmasterpiece. Garnet Spear is loved by many sorts of artists, and her image wasgiven numerous forms. Here in Utopia, there’s a room decorated with artworks ofworldwide mythology G.o.ds; allow me to take you there tomorrow. I will tell youthe anecdote of Garnet Spear later as well. Miss Violet. There are other thingsI want to tell and ask you about. That’s right, if you please, shall I give youa cameo of Garnet Spear as a sign of our closure?” Standing up from her seatonce, Lisbon pulled something out of the room’s chest and soon came back. “Ibelieve it is suitable for you to have this. It’s a cameo brooch made of whiteagate by one of the Utopia’s nuns. This is a selling item exported to thecontinent to pay for the expenses of our activities.” Fitting in the palm ofher hand was an oval-shaped object with the figure of the G.o.ddess sculpted on awhite agate stone.

Graspingthe emerald brooch attached to her robe, Violet said, “I… already have this.”

“Even if youdon’t put it on, you can leave it at hand.”

“No. I donot wish to have any brooches besides this one.”

Heratt.i.tude could be considered stubborn. Lisbon retained her smile, but inwardlyclicked her tongue.

——No need to hurry. First, show affection,preach our teachings and let it sink in.

Lisbon’sgaze had become not that of a nun who served the G.o.ds, but that of a hunter.

One daypa.s.sed after that person appeared before my eyes during a thunderstorm. Therain continued intensely pouring outside, so going outdoors seemed veryunlikely. After morning prayer had ended, as I was told that I was supposed toeat at the indoor garden instead of my imprisonment room, I had to think a bitabout what to do. That was because I had exchanged conversations with other demiG.o.dcandidates up until then.

——Just the usual scheme.

The demeanorof a demiG.o.d living in a utopia was something wanted from me.

“Lady Lux,this is Miss Violet, who works for a postal company. Because of this badweather, she is relying on the Utopia.”

The one whomI had observed amidst those lightning bolts was far more fine-looking as seenin person at close range. Violet Evergarden. She had a quiet beauty that didnot disappoint.

There wasno fountain in the indoor garden, but the gra.s.s and flowers arranged in bowls wereput close together so as to stage a small forest, creating a pure atmosphere.The place was often used for entertaining people who came from the outsideworld to the Utopia. It was open and cozy, making the Utopia naturally morecomfortable.

“This isthe demiG.o.d whom we are currently protecting in this Utopia, Lady Lux Sibyl. Wefound Lady Lux about seven years ago… When we heard rumors about herappearance and went to where she was, we saw that she was the splitting imageof the G.o.ddess of knowledge, Roses, as you can tell. On top of that, Lady Luxwas an orphan and did not know her origins… she did not know her father, either.Most likely, she fell to the Earth after being birthed by the G.o.ddess Roses forsome reason. It’s unfortunate…”

“She really…has the same looks as the ill.u.s.tration.”

“You, too,are similar to Garnet Spear.” I replied, and Violet just noddedexpressionlessly, seeming neither happy nor upset.

Both of usresembled G.o.ds.

“This istruly a wonderful thing, you two.”

The place wasmostly a collection of fake plants. We had breakfast together on the seats setin the garden and had a harmless and inoffensive chitchat. I nonchalantlytalked about how life in the Utopia was superb. Violet seemed not to beinterested. Her att.i.tude implied that she was more concerned about the soundsof the heavy rain outside.

I did notknow much about the work of Auto-Memories Dolls, so I was surprised to hearthat it consisted of women traveling alone around the world as amanuenses. Theyhad to care for the letters of their clients above anything. I came tounderstand that as she always had her bag with her.

——Incredible. I can’t… do the same at all.

I could notset a single foot out of the Utopia.

At first, Idid not intend to take the conversation too far, but upon second thought, ithad been a long time since I had last chatted with a woman close to my age, sothe pace of the talk wound up accidentally quickening on my end.

“MissViolet, what do you do on holidays?”

“I stay onstandby. I wait for the next job.”

“You surelylive in a big city, right? I admire those who are able to see various shops.You go outside often, so do you like staying home better after all?”

“I do notparticularly like or dislike it. If I have a goal, I go outside.”

“Such ashanging out with a friend?”

It wasstrange. The more we talked, the more I wanted to know about her.

“I do nothave friends.”

“Is thatso?”

“Yes.”

Her mannerof speech was curt, but I contrastingly got a good feeling from it. Sayingthings honestly was always better than hiding lies and keeping up a caringfaçade.

“Hum, but Ialso don’t have any, so it’s okay.”

“Is thissomething that must be confirmed?”

“Eh?”

“You saidthat it was ‘okay’…”

“R-Right.It’s weird to say that it’s okay, isn’t it?”

Ponderingon whether I had spoiled the mood, I was feeling regretful, but Violet deniedthat. “No. That is not it. I had been wondering if this was not actually thecase. To tell the truth, my superior was also worried about it…” Violetnodded with a serious face, as if there was something she really had to thinkabout.

“Is thatso?”

“Yes, hesaid something similar to your question, Lady Lux. It seems it is ‘normal’ tohave friends. I do not understand the concept of ‘normal’ very well… I am nottroubled by not having any, and I do not know how to make one.”

“Do youhave meals with people from your workplace or stuff like that?”

“Sometimes,yes.”

“How aboutstarting from there? For instance, having a talk like this one…”

“Will webecome friends if we talk?”

“I wonder…”

“This isvery difficult.”

“It is…”

“Yes,things that others… do naturally are very difficult for me.”

“I totallyunderstand.”

Violetstarted slowly but surely asking me questions as well, about what I did duringthe day, if I could see colors the same way with both of my eyes even with thembeing heterochromatic, and what I did on holidays, just as I had asked her. Ianswered those only in the way I could.

“Lady Lux,do you not go outside?”

“No.”

“So you arealways here?”

“Yes, untilnow, and from now on.”

“Is thatthe mission bestowed upon you, Lady Lux?”

“It mightbe better like this. After all, demiG.o.ds are not supposed to descend to humanlands.”

“I was…told a little about the mythology. It is because you might become involved withunfortunate happenings.”

“Yes.”

“Lady Lux,were you unfortunate when you were outside?”

“I was poorand alone… it’s true that I needed protection.”

“This isnot a land of humans but there are many humans here. Even so, is there anythingpreventing the effects of misfortune?”

Thebreathing of the people in the place – myself and the nuns serving us – haltedseamlessly. Her way of inquiring did not seem to be that of someone who wasdigging for some sort of information.

“I…wonder.”

“You do notknow?” A simple question. An innocent line of thought.

“No,that… that… Miss Violet. Why… do you… ask?”

Sometimes,things like that were the beginning of a turmoil that would cast discord overpeaceful moments.

“No, Iapologize if it is something challenging to answer. I was merely thinking thatyou did not have to force yourself to stay here if you were ill-fated here aswell.”

It was asituation that I, who only spent my days thinking about when scary times would beover, just as I was waiting for that storm to end, could not cope with.

“Am… I…forcing… myself?” while speaking, I could not help but be curious about thestare of the nun by my side. I could feel a pressure from her gaze that threateninglyseemed to order me to “not say anything unnecessary”.

“I was toldyou could not leave here for the rest of your life. But you talked about youradmiration for cities…”

“That’sright… I indeed said that. However… in any case, it’s impossible.”

“What is?”

“I cannotleave this place.”

“Why?”

“It’s not allowed.Since I’m a demiG.o.d…”

“Notallowed by whom?”

“Eh?”

“Who doesnot allow it?”

“That’s…”

——Aah, no good.

“Lady Luxis a worshipped demiG.o.d. Is there anyone above you here?”

——Don’t expose it.

“The factthat I can’t go out even though I want to is… because…”

——Don’t say any more than that.

“Because…”

The soundof palms clapping ensued. I looked at the nun in fear. Having forcefullystopped our conversation, she had a cheerful smile on.

“Lady Lux,Miss Violet, it has become cold here. Shall we move to somewhere else?”

As the talkwas interrupted, Violet’s lips suggested she had something to say, but shesilently complied. It was because I was begging with my eyes. She was graduallyrealizing that place’s ambiguity.

——Hurry and escape. Once the nun turned around, I said so withoutvoicing it. I wondered if she understood. I hoped so. If it was now, she couldstill make it.

Yes, I wasconfined in that place.

I proposedto the nun, “Sister, can’t we show her the premises…? Like, the room with theimages of the G.o.ds, and other things. She must be bored only waiting for theweather to clear up.”

“That… isnot open to the public.”

“Still, Iwant to show it to her. I want to see it as well. See, since I don’t have muchtime…”

The nun’smouth seemed to be about to muster rejection, yet she wound up givingpermission, “That’s right. You will only stay on Earth for a little whilelonger. Surely, there are other nuns who wish to see Lady Lux. Miss Violet wassummoned to see Lisbon after we are done, so she will have to take her leavehalfway, but until then…”

I knew thatnun had a soft side to her. She had always taken care of me ever since I hadbeen brought there. She probably had a bit of affection towards me. I wasgrateful for that, but at the same time, extremely afraid of it.

“When Ithink about how the time we have to talk like this is coming to an end, I feelvery lonely.”

Afraid ofhow much all the people there valued me.

“Well,then, shall I show you around without further ado?”

Led by thenun, the four of us went around the Utopia. Its management mostly consisted of supportfrom an investor whom we called the ‘owner’. I never met them, but they were clearlyfilthy rich.

All kindsof religious paintings and busts of G.o.ds adorned the corridors. We had anindoor church where luxuriously colorful stained gla.s.s shone overhead, alibrary crammed with old and new books, and a large public bath made of marble.

The amountof working nuns was not only a dozen. Just everyone being able to eat every dayalready cost money. Given the maintenance cost of the building, our budget likelyescalated.

“Here isthe last stop. We invited an artisan to make these. It’s the room of the G.o.ds’sculptures.”

A sereneworld awaited beyond the heavy door that was opened. I had only visited it in afew occasions, but no matter how many times I looked at it, I had a feeling of heaviness.A variety of statues were placed disorderly in the room, and water murmurings couldbe heard as a number of small waterways ran through the ground. Glitteringgla.s.s beads spread beautifully inside them. From the ceiling, plants called ‘darkvines’, which were said to grow well even where the sunlight did not hit,extended their branches around the walls and the ground, creating a fantasticatmosphere.

“My, so thepreparations have been completed? Lady Lux, I will excuse myself for a littlebit.” The nun beckoned another member of the Utopia’s personnel from theentrance in-between the statues of the G.o.ds and left our side.

——Now’s the time. I thought as I grasped Violet’s arm and pulledit.

“Lady Lux,hum… what were you trying to say earlier?”

“This way.I will show you Garnet Spear’s sculpture.” While saying so, I had a differentobjective. As we walked towards the statue of Garnet Spear fighting against agiant snake, I asked, “Miss Violet, have the Utopia’s Sisters asked youanything?”

Her line ofsight shifted from me to the statue as she answered, “Yes, I was questionedabout my origins… and upbringing. I have been told to not talk much aboutmyself, so I did not say anything other than that I was an orphan… and anex-soldier.”

I frowned.What a situation. That gorgeous girl who resembled Garnet Spear did not haveparents. She was the exact kind of ‘demiG.o.d’ that the Utopia sought.

“MissViolet. Listen well. The Sisters say this Utopia’s goal is to protect andvenerate demiG.o.ds, but that is wrong. It’s true… that I was saved from beingraised in an orphanage and from poverty after being taken in by them… but atthe same time, my life is being targeted.”

Perhapsbecause my tone was hard to hear, Violet finally peeled her eyes off thesculpture. “What do you mean? Please tell me about this in detail.”

That waswhen I heard the nun calling for us. Hiding in-between the statues, I resumedthe discussion, “The Utopia’s objective is the safeguarding of demiG.o.ds. Butthe main goal is returning them to the Heavens, where the G.o.ds reside. MostdemiG.o.d legends end with them being destroyed in the land of men because oftheir powers. The Utopia resents this and attempts to guide them to theHeavens… but the method for that is murder. This is a facility of a homicidalgroup in which people tainted with a twisted form of thinking gather.”

Violetblinked piercingly. “In summary, Lady Lux is fated to be killed?”

“It’s beendecided that I will be returned to Heaven on the morning of the next day offull moon, three days from now. It will be my birthday. The demiG.o.ds kept hereare raised waiting for the day they become fourteen years old. In general, itis said in the continent that fourteen-year-olds are adults, so the Utopia’sideal is that our childhood should be lived in the human world, and our adulthoodin the Heavens. However, if a demiG.o.d who is older than fourteen is taken in,they are killed within no more than ten days. Up until now, I have seen severaladult demiG.o.d candidates, who either were brought here, lost or visiting, beslaughtered by them. You are in danger too. The Utopia is targeting you as ademiG.o.d as well.”

“Me…?”

“I told youthat the Utopia was a group of people with twisted thinking, didn’t I? To tellthe truth, we don’t need to have some sort of amazing power; just having thelooks is enough. I myself am not that smart. I don’t know why I was born withan appearance like this, but I’ve heard that there is an ethnic group with thesame hair and eyes in a country far from here. I’m sure that’s my ancestry.Also, one more thing that is essential to decide if someone is a demiG.o.d is ifthey either are orphans or don’t have one parent. It’s because that makes iteasy to pretend they’re from the demiG.o.d legends. On top of that, Miss Violet,not only do you resemble Garnet Spear, but you are also a former soldier. Fromthe Utopia’s viewpoint, this is like saying ‘please kill me’.” I went on hastily,as though to stir up the sense of dread.

Still,perhaps not having any fear at all towards the Utopia’s truth, Violetdispa.s.sionately interjected, “Is that so?”

“MissViolet, don’t ‘is that so’ me and just run away. You said Sister Lisbon hadcalled you, right? You must not go. They will most certainly give you some medicineto restrain your body.”

“How wouldthey kill me?” she carefreely asked about the method of her own murder.

“You’d beput on a small boat that would sail along the course of Chevalier’s biggestwaterfall and drop down from it. Right now, there are plenty of openings foryou to escape. Please run away.” As if appealing, I shook her arms. Amechanical creak resounded from them.

She was aperson with automated parts and as charming as a doll. I really could think ofsomeone like her as a demiG.o.d. For an instant, I was almost similar to thepeople of Utopia for having that sort of reasoning, and became afraid ofmyself.

As I slowlylet go of Violet’s arms, she firmly held my hands. “Thank you for yourkindness. I will do as you warned and leave this place as soon as possible.Lady Lux, allow me to a.s.sist you with your own escape as well.”

Did shereally understand what sort of circ.u.mstances she was currently in? I could notread her as she was expressionless, but at any rate, she seemed willing toflee. As I was relieved, I could not a.s.sent with my head to the help she hadoffered me.

“Lady Lux?”

I stoppedmoving halfway to a smile. I was unable to properly muster my voice out of mythroat. My blood pressure rapidly lowered and the muscles of my back went cold.That was a creeping sensation of alarm one would feel when committing anenormous failure. It began to take over my body. What was I so scared of? Beingsaved by someone was a dream I had had for many years.

——What’s wrong with me?

Even so, Iwas unable to grab onto the hand stretched towards me.

——I have to say it. I have to say, “please dothat”.

If I stayedthere, I would die a painful underwater death within three days. That was adefinite truth. The nuns that treated me so gently now, too, would forget aboutme once I was gone and find a new demiG.o.d to worship. After all, theirs was afalse affection. In reality, I was not loved by anyone. I was not cherished byanyone. There was nothing good in that place. I could not trust anybody.Everything was scary. Still…

“Lady Lux,do you not wish to leave here?”

——I… I… just realized that I’m scared ofventuring into the outside world.

“That…that’s not it…”

No, I hadactually realized it a long time before.

“Do you notwish to run away?”

I knew. Iknew.

“Arepeople… supposed to fear death?”

That was it.I did not want to die. But…

“I don’twant to… die.”

…but tome, living was as frightening as dying. Yes, frightening.

Ever sinceI had been brought there from the orphanage when I was seven years old, I wasalways a caged bird. I received education, but I only knew what was in thescriptures. I also could not craft like the nuns. If I went into the outsideworld just like that, how was I supposed to live? Other girls my age surely knewall kinds of things, and had family, friends and a place to belong. Yet I hadnothing. I was no more than a cowardly child continuously immersed in despairwithin the darkness I was confined, who had been watching other people die withoutbeing able to intervene. No, I could not even be considered a child anymore. Iwas nothing. Once someone as useless as me stepped outside, what should I do?Was it not clear that I would die a dog’s death? If that was the case, then theinvitation of demise given to me by that forced fate…

——…would be much better. As I thought so, my voice did notcome out.

“Lady Lux!”Upon being called stridently, my body shook in surprise.

The nun wasobserving us from the side of Garnet Spear’s statue. It might be that she hadheard our exchange. No, she definitely had. Actual rage and scorn were nowseeping out of her usually placid face.

I swiftlypushed the nun away. “Run!”

As I shouted,Violet reached her arm out to me again. “Lady Lux, your hand.”

Her figurewas just like that of a knight. I had always, always imagined such a scene. A handsome,n.o.ble prince – someone that magnificent would come to save me from the Utopiaof hopelessness.

Nevertheless,while suppressing the nun, I shook my head. “Please go! I… I cannot live inthe outside world! Please! Hurry and go!”

Violetattempted to hold onto me and take me by force, but I shook her off.

——I really… can’t.

I chosedeath in the last minute.

——I’m scared. Living is… scarier.

I wasstupid. It was a stupid choice. However, being alive was especially arduous forme.

——I have always been shallowly breathing rightbeside death.

Thatenvironment had already allowed me to cogitate dying, and I had grown used to it.All I could think about was that I could hardly wait for the day to come.

——Living is… scarier.

It was muchharsher to live in the world of humans, being used, lied to, and acc.u.mulatingsad memories.

“I will diehere! That’s what I want to do! I can’t live… in the outside world at thispoint! I’ll die like this… in this place… so go!”

It could bethat I had become insane. While I had said that the people of Utopia werecrazy, it might be that the craziest and most broken one was myself.

After standingon the spot for a few seconds, Violet turned her back to me. And then,suddenly, she destroyed the stained gla.s.s window between the statues with onearm. She certainly planned to escape from there. Rain and wind, along with alarge amount of leaves and flowers that had been ripped off the trees burst in.

“Don’t runaway! You’re a demiG.o.d! Under our control…!” the nun yelled.

Now I wasthe one being pushed. But even so, I did not lose to her. I grabbed her footwith one hand and clung to it. “Run!” I desperately endured being kicked.

Violetstood by the window frame, strongly holding her bag to her side. The heightfrom there to the ground was one that could ensure an escape if one did notfail in landing.

——Now, go!

I thoughtshe would surely not turn back. However, her neck snapped towards my direction,and she offered her hand once more. “Lady Lux.” It was as if her eyes said“come, let’s escape this place together”.

If I tookthat hand, maybe I could have a future.

——Aah, this storm, her, death, everything.

I was sorryfor the person with those strong eyes that made me think of these things.

——They’re all mixing up in my head and are toonoisy; I don’t want them.

Since I wastired of even so much as thinking.

“Go.” Iwhispered that single word.

“If youever need help, call my name.” Saying nothing but that, she jumped out of thewindow.

The nun letout a sharp scream. After being cussed by her as she got up, I was. .h.i.t on thecheek and fell on the spot. Looking at her distorted face, I scoffed.

——See, the world really is terrifying.

That waswhy dying was easier.

The morningafter the downpour had stopped was beautiful. Trees and gra.s.s covered in dewleft a characteristic after-rain odor. The Sun enclosed the world with a light unlikethat of the sunset. That very morning Sun caused the continuous drizzle tosparkle. The birthday and funeral of a girl, who was worshiped by a certain religiousorganization of a certain isolated island, was greeted with such a fine day.

“Lady Lux,please go soundly.”

With a gunpointed at her, Lux had her wrists tied and was put on a small boat filled withflowers. The “soundly” that Lisbon had said was not directed at the one who wasabout to die. Lux’s face had clear evidence that she had received beating. Hermouth was swollen purple, the corner of her eye injured. Perhaps because shehad not been granted any rest, her head staggered and her vision was out offocus.

As Luxremained silent even with such an exhausted face, Lisbon laughed. “Lady Lux,you were the most easily manageable and submissive demiG.o.d I’ve ever seen. Wehave not forgiven you for helping that Auto-Memories Doll escape, but… wewill stop blaming you, as you are about to go on a journey to the Heavens. Anylast words?”

Lux lookedup at Lisbon blankly. That world had such a stunning scenery, so how come thepeople living in it were so ugly? As if sensing Lux’s feelings, a distortedsmile appeared on Lisbon’s lips.

“How longwill you continue doing this?”

“Always.For… ever.”

“What’s themeaning of it?”

“You areasking that now?” Lisbon snorted as if making fun of her. “We wish to protectthis world, which the G.o.ds have created. You’ve listened to the legends ofdemiG.o.ds several times, right? They are disparate both in Heavens and on Earth.You are disparate. An existence like that is… strange. It’s strange, right?”

Even whilebeing questioned, Lux could not respond to being labeled with the word“strange”.

“Yourexistence itself is strange. What’s with those eyes and hair? They’re not‘normal’. If disparate ones are not disposed of, they might cause trouble.”

“Ihaven’t… done… anything.”

“Even ifyou haven’t done anything yet, you eventually might. Your existence is abother. To put it simply, we are… afraid of those like you. That is why weworship, respect and kill you.”

They couldnot stand those who were not like them, who were not similar to them.

Lux finallyunderstood the reason why the people of that organization a.s.sembled. Self-lovethat had gone too far. Not identifying with another person made them uneasy.Therefore, they would kill them. It was a perverse belief, but for them, thatwas overlooked as ‘normal’.

——And the craziest one here is me, for thinkingthat being killed by these people was best.

The gun wasaimed at the circlet on Lux’s head.

“You wereactually supposed to die by drowning, but the Sister who used to take care ofyou begged for mercy. We shall let you die with a gunshot. Because dyingsuffocated… is terrible. Then, farewell, Lady Lux. We deliver this to you inyour last moments: the chorus number 320.” Lisbon gave a signal behind herback.

As she didso, the other nuns, who were lined up and had been watching the two of them,begun to sing a requiem. Even though they were attempting a collective murder,their singing voices were beautiful.

“Our G.o.dsin Heaven…”

She wouldbe killed once the song was over.

In order todilute her fear of death, Lux muttered the words that she had been made tomemorize over and over from the scriptures, “I am your child, I am you fleshand blood, I am your tears…”

The soundof the water echoing from under the boat was the sound of the tomb that shewould soon flow into.

“Have pity,have pity, have pity on me.” The roots of her teeth trembled unevenly. “Pityme, G.o.d.” Hers was a crying voice. Lux steadily shed tears at the fear of herunstoppable journey towards death.

Althoughshe had chosen death, the fact that it was frightening to welcome it did notchange. Although living was scarier, the agony awaiting her was unbearable.

“G.o.d…G.o.d… Lady Roses…”

Lux’s bodywould probably be carried by the river and drop from the great waterfall. Hercorpse would float along with the flowers, fall into the basin and be swallowedby it. Her whole being would be invaded by water and sink. Just by imaginingit, she felt like fainting. Rather, it would be wonderful if she could faintnow.

“G.o.d…Lady Roses… Lady Roses…” Lux repeatedly called for the name of the G.o.ddessthat was said to be her mother. “Lady Roses… Lady Roses…” Many times,instead of reciting spells to eliminate her fear. “Lady Roses… Lady Roses… LadyRoses…”

——Mom, you gave birth to and abandoned me onlyto act like you have anything to do with it afterwards?

“LadyRoses…”

——What even was my life?

“Lady… Roses… ugh… uh, ah, ugh…”

——When I was little, even though I was poor,even though I was an orphan, I wouldn’t have chosen death by my own will. Whydid things turn out like this?

“Lady…Roses… uuh…” She called for her even while hiccupping. “Uuh… uh…Rose…” That was how she was spending her last moments. “Uah—aaah… uuugh…”With her mouth still open. “Vi…” With the will of someone who still earnedfor air. “Vi… o…” She called for her G.o.d of salvation, who set apart herfears. “Vi… o… let…!” Lux shouted naturally.

“If you ever need help, call my name.”

The name ofthe only person who had ever truly attempted to save her in her life.

“Violet!Violet, Violet! Help me! I don’t want to die!”

Was thatwish a trigger for something? A scream rose during the requiem. Lisbon suddenlyfell down. Lux’s eyes could see someone strike Lisbon from behind. As she washit on the head, Lisbon wound up letting go of the cords that kept the smallboat in place, and so it begun to be carried by the current. Yet the cords wereimmediately held back and the boat stopped.

“Eh?”

The nun whohad committed such misconduct stood flat-faced.

“Eh, eh?”

Holding ontothe cords of the boat, the nun stretched her arms towards Lux to forcibly pullher back to land. She pushed Lux behind her back protectively, and the smallboat was carried by the stream as if it were n.o.body’s business.

Everyone wasstunned. Their mouths were agape to a ludicrous extent.

“I havebeen…”

For the onewho had destroyed the ritual to appear from that place’s interior was somethingunconceivable. It was impossible.

“…waitingfor you…”

Yet she whohad done so…

“…to callmy name, Lady Lux.”

…exposedher face as she took off her white wimple.

“Vi…olet!”

It was theonly person who had risked herself to truly help Lux in her life. She was anodd Auto-Memories Doll.

Beforeanyone realized it, Violet was holding the gun that had been in Lisbon’s hands.With no mercy, she shot at the nuns’ feet. Earth flew up as if exploding.

“Open thepath. If anyone intends to interfere, I warn that you will not come out of thiswith only a bruise.”

Withoutmoving from the spot, the nuns looked at each other.

“Fightback, my fellows who serve the G.o.ds!” Lying on the ground and enduring thepain, Lisbon yelled.

The nunsgathered together and responded to her brave call. They all took knives andpistols from within their robes and headed towards the two.

“Forgiveme, but I will have to treat you a little roughly.” Violet took Lux into herarms. With the possible difficulty of handling her, Violet put Lux under herarm and broke into run.

The nunscame in their direction as though to clash with them. With the impulse sheearned from the run, Violet leaped and kicked several of them as if topplingdomino pieces.

Beingtreated as luggage, Lux let out an offbeat scream. Violet thrust her to the endof the path she had opened, turning again towards the enemies. With a broadswing, she threw the gun that had run out of ammo at an opponent who held Luxat gunpoint, hitting her on the face and causing her to pa.s.s out. She thendashed upwards by kicking the stomach of someone who rushed towards her with aknife, performing a somersault. Stealing two guns from a fallen foe, and whileshooting with both, she took control of the surroundings. In spite of theoverwhelming disadvantage of one person versus many, Violet had the upper handin that unfolding battlefield.

Shuddering,Lux shrank back. Violet, who noticed an enemy attempting to attack Lux again, immediatelyjumped. Coiling her body around the nun like a snake, she tangled her legsaround the other’s neck and applied weight to them, turning her over. She then downedher fist onto the nun’s face.

——She’s… overwhelming.

Lux’s eyeswere glued to the way she fought.

Violetdeclared uncharacteristically loudly to the fallen nuns staring at her, “Myarms are prosthetics of Estark Inc. They can easily crush your bodies. Thosewho are ready for it, please do step forth.” Her courageous figure as sheopened one hand before her chest, then balled a fist with her palm letting outa screech, was the one of a beautiful fighter.

The nunsogled her frame as if seeing the G.o.ddess of combat, Garnet Spear, whom they hadrevered no small amount of times.

As she wasable to get up somehow despite her bleeding head, Lisbon shouted, “What are youdoing? Seize her! You can return her to the Heavens right here… I will allowit. We cannot let such a monster loose on this land.”

“AredemiG.o.ds monsters?”

Shepromptly answered Violet’s question, “That’s right. Monsters like you… aren’tsupposed to be on Earth. Halves who are neither people nor G.o.ds… your powerswill surely bring us tragedy! You… you are a great example! Where did you…learn to fight like this?! Just how many people have you killed…? The likesof you were not supposed to be born. You heretics!” Lisbon’s eyes werebloodshot, and saliva bubbled from her lips, which used to form a gentle smile.

There werenuns with shocked expressions at her utterances, but the ones who agreed withand nodded at her strongly gripped their weapons again.

Violetsimply retorted Lisbon’s curses, “I see. I might really be a demiG.o.d, by thelooks of it. If that is the case, I can confirm many of these things.” With hertone that had a sweet ring to it becoming icy, she continued, “Indeed, theremight be no helping it if an imitation of human being such as myself werekilled with the pretense of being returned to Heaven. But Lady Lux isdifferent. She is… merely a girl who went through frightening experiences.”There was no hesitation in her actions or words. “You might be satisfied if Isaid ‘please take me’. However, I am now a domesticated monster. I cannotafford to be killed so easily. I am forbidden to fight unnecessary battles, but…my Lord once told me” she removed her black gloves, displaying her artificialarms, “to ‘live’.” Violet instantly rushed towards Lisbon, this time throwing apunch at her stomach.

Lisbon flewa long distance. Her body fell into the river and the other nuns went for heraid in an extreme hurry, as it seemed she would be carried away by the current.

Just aswing from one of her fists was enough to send someone soaring through the airlike a doll. Upon witnessing that fact, those who had taken back their weaponslet go of them at once.

“Challengers,come forward. I, Violet Evergarden, shall take you on.” The beautiful womanstanding calmly amidst of so much violence was lurid and bewitching.

In the end,no one attempted to go against her after that, and so, Lux and Violet walkedtheir way out of the place.

“That wasscary… that was scary…”

“You werescared? But now, you are safe.”

Somewhereaway from the river, as Lux’s restraints were removed, she burst into tears.The horror she had gone through just a little while before suddenly reoccurredto her.

Halfwaycrossing the woods that went in the direction of the island’s harbor onViolet’s lead, they stopped to take Violet’s precious bag, which had been verycarefully suspended on a tree branch. Did she have confidence that they wouldbe able to come so far, Lux asked herself while crying.

“Hadn’t yourun away?”

“In theend, the rain did not stop, so I was camping in a cave I had found. I was…thinking all the while in there… about what Lady Lux had said.”

“Me…?”

“Thatyou… could not live in the outside world.”

She hadindeed said so.

“I will die here! That’s what I want to do! Ican’t live… in the outside world at this point! I’ll die like this… in thisplace… so go!”

It had beenone truth from the peak of her limits.

“Although Iam a little different, I, too… had always been living in only one world. Iwas used by a certain person and did not know any other way of life besides it.That world had its circ.u.mstances, and we were set apart… so I becameseparated from my Lord. Even though a kind person attempted to teach me a newlifestyle, at first, I resisted it. If I ceased to be myself… no, if I ceasedto be an ‘a.s.set’, I thought that the person who had needed me until then wouldno longer want me.”

The twogirls walked. The path ahead was testing. It was coated in mud, damp with gra.s.scondensation, and all they could count on were their own feet. However, theywent on without ever turning back.

“I believedthat Lady Lux was the same as me. That if you chose a new path, you would be troubledas to what you should do at that point, in that different trajectory…? Perhapsyou were thinking, ‘Am I wanted in that place? If I am not, it is not worthanything’. Or ‘If I am not wanted there, I must be an unnecessary existence’.That is… extremely…” She was probably at loss on what term to use. Herp.r.o.nunciation was that of someone who was borrowing the words of another, “Itis extremely… ‘scary’.”

It wasincredibly strange for that young woman to be scared of something, Lux thought.

——I mean, she’s so strong and pretty. Sheseems… invincible.

Yet she wasthe same as Lux herself. She was slightly afraid of living.

“But, MissViolet, you did not stop, right?”

She wasafraid, but had chosen to live.

“Yes, I wasordered to live, and… I felt I had many things to reflect on. There was trulyso much I did not know. The many words that person had taught me… and said tome, such as ‘I lo’…” she trailed off. Violet grabbed the emerald brooch onher chest to ease her hammering heartbeats. “I started to think… that I…wanted to learn about and understand the words I had been told, of a feelingthat is foreign to me. So, Lady Lux, your way of thinking might change. Youcan… die anytime. When the time you wish to do so comes, no one can stop you.That is why, I was wondering if it was not all right… for you to know alittle more about the outside world until then… and so I meddled. Iapologize. I will take the responsibility. We can still cross over in thiscondition. Lady Lux, if you do not have a destination, please just come withme. I will not do anything harmful.” Violet stretched her hand out to Lux, whowalked a few steps behind her.

This time,Lux did not hesitate. The mechanical arm was cold and hard, but for somereason, it felt warm to her.

Violet’s robeswere covered in dirt and her hair was disheveled. There was nothing in her thatmade her seem like she was wearing a knight in shiny armor, but to Lux, herfigure overlapped with Garnet Spear’s.

“I amforever indebted to you for rushing to my aid.”

As Luxspoke with a runny nose, Violet asked back, “What are you saying? Lady Lux,were you not the one who saved me first? I am grateful to you for havingcourage and warning me.”

As Lux wasboth shocked and happy to have someone’s grat.i.tude despite being how she was,she cried once again.

——I guess will… live a little more after all.

Sheimmediately fixed her way of thinking right then.

Whathappened afterwards was that I was taken by Violet to her workplace, the CHPostal Service, and started living there. At first, I was only in charge ofphone calls, but within a year, I simultaneously became the president’spersonal secretary, leading a restless everyday life.

PresidentHodgins was someone I could respect, for he kindly – and sometimes strictly –took care of a girl like me, of unknown background and who had come from anobscure religious organization. However, I came to understand that he was aperson with a quirk or two.

The onlythings that changed in me ever since I arrived there were that I got a haircutand replaced my circlet for a berretta. And I became a little closer to Violet,to the point we became able to talk to each other without honorifics.

Shecontinued on rushing about as a stardom of Auto-Memories Dolls. Her appearancedid not change much. Maybe all that was different was the frilly umbrella addedto her standard outfit?

Being ableto meet with the much-requested Violet was quite difficult, but she returnedregularly to the office, and during those times, I would invite her for tea. Seatedat the terrace of a nearby café facing the city’s main street, we would reportour recent situations to one another while observing the traffic. My storieswere mostly about our unprecedented boss, but Violet would talk about thevarious countries she had dragged her feet around and the people she had met inthem. The feelings of a writer who lived surrounded by beautiful mountainstowards his beloved daughter. The letters to the future from a mother who livedin an old-fashioned household on a slightly elevated hill. The sad last momentsof a youth who was returned to his hometown in the countryside. The pa.s.sionate determinationof a young astronomer whom she had met in a city of starry skies.

Swingingfrom joy to sorrow at her narrations, I would sometimes cry, sometimes laugh. Wesurely looked like just two female friends when chatting so peacefully. No oneshould be able to tell that we were the former live sacrifice of a religious organizationand an ex-soldier.

It was notas if I had forgotten my past, but I had no intention of continuing to engagein it. After all, the me who was a demiG.o.d of Roses had died back then, and thecurrent me was an employee of a postal company.

Those whodie do not come back. Physical bodies, time and values can never be retrieved.My feelings of embracing the thirst for death remained firmly rooted within me,but they had fallen to the bottom of a deep, deep sleep. “Don’t wake up yet”, Iwould tell them every morning.

There weredays when I would think that living really was hard, but during those times, Iwould close my eyes and strongly reminisce to that instant in which my minimumand maximum intermingled. That I was going to perish in a small boat meant as acoffin, decorated with flowers. That I had cried in it about how I did not wantto die. That someone had saved me. That her artificial arm had reached out tome.

VioletEvergarden, the friend that I was proud of having.