"You"d never find it," she answered mysteriously, and hurried out while he held the door open to light her down the dark staircase.
When her tread was heard at last on the landing below, Susan glanced at the books that were still left on the shelves. "I"ll pack the rest for you to-morrow, Oliver, and your clothes, too. Have you any money?"
"A little left from selling my watch in New York. My clothes don"t amount to much. I"ve got them all in that bag, but I"ll leave my books in your charge until I can find a place for them."
"I"ll take good care of them. O Oliver!" her face grew disturbed. "I forgot all about my promise to Virginia that I"d bring you to see her to-night."
"Well, I"ve no time to meet girls now, of course, but that doesn"t mean that I"m not awfully knocked up about it."
"I hate so to disappoint her."
"She won"t think of it twice, the beauty!"
"But she will. I"m sure she will. Hush! Mother is coming."
As he turned to the door, it opened slowly to admit the figure of his aunt, who was panting heavily from her hurried ascent of the stairs. Her ill-humour toward Susan had entirely disappeared, for the only resentment she had ever harboured for more than a few minutes was the life-long one which she had borne her husband.
"It was not in the place where I had put it, so I thought one of the servants had taken it," she explained. "Mandy was alone in my room to-day while I was at dinner."
In her hand she held a small pasteboard box bearing a jeweller"s imprint, and opening this, she took out a roll of money and counted out fifty dollars on the top of a packing-case. "I"ve saved this up for six months," she said. "It came from selling some silver forks that belonged to the Bolingbrokes, and I always felt easier to think that I had a little laid away that he had nothing to do with. From the very day that I married him, he was always close about money," she added.
The sordid tragedy--not of poverty, but of meanness--was in the gesture with which she gathered up the notes and pressed them into his shrinking hands. And yet Cyrus Treadwell was a rich man--the richest man living in Dinwiddie! Oliver understood now why she was crushed--why she had become the hopeless victim of the little troubles of life. "From the very day of our marriage, he was always close about money."
"I had three dozen forks and spoons in the beginning," she resumed as if there were no piercing significance in the fact she stated so simply, "but I"ve sold them all now, one or two at a time, when I needed a little money of my own. He has always paid the bills, but he never gave me a cent in my life to do as I pleased with."
"I can"t take it from you, Aunt Belinda. It would burn my fingers."
"It"s mine. I"ve got a right to do as I choose with it," she persisted almost pa.s.sionately, "and I"d rather give it to you than buy anything in the world." Something in her face--the look of one who has risen to a generous impulse and finds happiness in the sacrifice--checked the hand with which he was thrusting the money away from him. He was deeply touched by her act; it was useless for him to pretend either to her or to himself that she had not touched him. The youth in him, unfettered, strong, triumphant, pitied her because she was no longer young; the artist in him pitied her because she was no longer beautiful. Without these two things, or at least one of these two, what was life worth to a woman?
"I"ll take it on condition that you"ll let me pay it back as soon as I get out of debt to Uncle Cyrus," he said in obedience to Susan"s imploring nod.
To this she agreed after an ineffectual protest. "You needn"t think about paying it back to me," she insisted; "I haven"t anything to spend money on now, so it doesn"t make much difference whether I have any or not. I can help you a little more after a while," she finished with enthusiasm. "I"m raising a few squabs out in the back yard, and Meadows is going to buy them as soon as they are big enough to eat."
An embarra.s.sment out of all proportion to the act which produced it held him speechless while he gazed at her. He felt at first merely a sense of physical revolt from the brutality of her self-revelation--from the nakedness to which she had stripped the horror of her marriage under the eyes of her daughter. Nothing, not even the natural impulse to screen one"s soul from the gaze of the people with whom one lived, had prevented the appalling indignity of this exposure. The delusion that it is possible for a woman by mere virtue of being a woman to suffer in sweetness and silence, evaporated as he looked at her. He had believed her to be a nonent.i.ty, and she was revealing an inner life as intense, as real, as acutely personal as his own. A few words of casual kindness and he had made a slave of her. He regretted it. He was embarra.s.sed. He was sorry. He wished to heaven she hadn"t brought him the money--and yet in spite of his regret and his embarra.s.sment, he was profoundly moved.
It occurred to him as he took it from her how easy it would have been for Cyrus to have subjugated and satisfied her in the beginning. All it needed was a little kindness, the cheapest virtue, and the tragedy of her ruined soul might have been averted. To make allowances! Ah, that was the philosophy of human relations in a word! If men and women would only stop judging each other and make allowances!
"Well, I shan"t starve just yet, thanks to you, Aunt Belinda," he said cheerfully enough as he thrust the notes into his pocket. It was a small thing, after all, to make her happy by the sacrifice of his pride. Pride was not, he remembered, included among the Christian virtues, and, besides, as he told himself the next instant, trifling as the sum was, it would at least tide him over financially until he received the next payment for his reviewing. "I"d better go, it"s getting late," he said with a return of his old gaiety, while he bent over to kiss her. He was half ashamed of the kiss--not because he was self-conscious about kissing, since he had long since lost that mark of provincialism--but because of the look of pa.s.sionate grat.i.tude which glowed in her face.
Grat.i.tude always made him uncomfortable. It was one of the things he was forever evading and yet forever receiving. He hated it, he had never in his life done anything to deserve it, but he could never escape it.
"Good-bye, Susan." His lips touched hers, and though he was moving only a few streets away, the caress contained all the solemnity of a last parting. Words wouldn"t come when he searched for them, and the bracing sense of power he had felt half an hour ago was curiously mingled now with an enervating tenderness. He was still confident of himself, but he became suddenly conscious that these women were necessary to his happiness and his success, that his nature demanded the constant daily tonic of their love and service. He understood now the primal necessity of woman, not as an individual, but as an incentive and an appendage to the dominant personality of man.
"Send for me if you need me," said Susan, resting her loving eyes upon him; "and, Oliver, please promise me to be very careful about money."
"I"ll be careful, never fear!" he replied with a laugh, as he took up his bag and opened the door. A few minutes later, when he was leaving the house, he reflected that the fifty dollars in his pocket would keep life in him for a considerable time in Dinwiddie.
CHAPTER VI
A TREADWELL IN REVOLT
York Street, in which Mrs. Peachey lived and supplied the necessaries of life to a dozen boarders, ran like a frayed seam of gentility between the prosperous and the impoverished quarters of Dinwiddie; and in order to reach it, Oliver was obliged to pa.s.s the rectory, where, though he did not see her, Virginia sat in stiffly starched muslin on the old horsehair sofa. The fragrance of honeysuckle floated to his nostrils from the dim garden, but so absorbed was he in the engrossing problems of the moment, that only after he had pa.s.sed the tower of the church did he remember that the house behind him sheltered the girl who reminded him of one of the adorable young virgins of Perugino. For an instant he permitted himself to dwell longingly on the expression of gentle goodness that looked from her face; but this memory proved so disturbing, that he put it obdurately away from him while he returned to the prudent consideration of the fifty dollars in his pocket. The appeal of first love had been almost as urgent to him as to Virginia; but the emotion which had visited both alike had affected each differently, and this difference was due to the fundamental distinction between woman, for whom love is the supreme preoccupation of being, and man, to whom it is at best a partial manifestation of energy. To the woman nothing else really mattered; to the man at least a dozen other pursuits mattered very nearly as much.
The sultriness of the weather dampened his body, but not his spirits, and as he walked on, carrying his heavy bag, along York Street, his consciousness of the tremendous importance to the world of his decision exhilarated him like a tonic. He had freed himself from Cyrus and from commercialism at a single blow, and it had all been as easy as talking!
The joke about starvation he had of course indulged in merely for the exquisite pleasure of arousing Susan. He wasn"t going to starve; n.o.body was going to starve in Dinwiddie on thirty dollars a month, and there was no doubt in the world of his ability to make that much by his reviewing. It was all simple enough. What he intended to do was to write the national drama and to practise economy.
He had, indeed, provided for everything in his future, he was to discover a little later, except for the affable condescension of Mrs.
Peachey toward the profession of letters. Cyrus"s antagonism he had attributed to the cra.s.s stupidity of the commercial mind; but it was a blow to him to encounter the same misconception, more discreetly veiled, in a woman of the charm and the character of Mrs. Peachey. Bland, plump, and pretty, she received the modest avowal of his occupation with the smiling skepticism peculiar to a race whose genius has been chiefly military.
"I understand--it is very interesting," she observed sweetly. "But what do you do besides--what do you do, I mean, for a living?"
Here it was again, this fatuous intolerance! this incomprehensible provincialism! And the terrible part of it was that he had suddenly the sensation of being overwhelmed by the weight of it, of being smothered under a mountain of prejudice. The flame of his anger against Cyrus went out abruptly, leaving him cold. It was the world now against which he rebelled. He felt that the whole world was provincial.
"I shall write reviews for a New York paper," he answered, trying in vain to impress her by a touch of literary hauteur. At the moment it seemed to him that he could cheerfully bear anything if they would only at least pretend to take him seriously. What appalled him was not the opposition, but the utter absence of comprehension. And he could never hope to convince them! Even if he were to write great plays, they would still hold as obstinately by their a.s.sumption that the writing of plays did not matter--that what really mattered was to create and then to satisfy an inordinate appet.i.te for tobacco. This was authentic success, and by no illegitimate triumph of genius could he persuade an industrial country that he was as great a man as his uncle. The smiling incredulity in Mrs. Peachey"s face ceased to be individual and became a part of the American att.i.tude toward the native-born artist. This att.i.tude, he admitted, was not confined to Dinwiddie, since it was national. He had encountered it in New York, but never had the destructive force of it impressed him as it did on the ripe and charming lips of the woman before him. In that illuminating instant he understood why the American consciousness in literature was still unawakened, why the creative artist turned manufacturer, why the original thinker bent his knee in the end to the tin G.o.ds of convention.
Her eyes--beautiful as the eyes of all happy women are beautiful--dwelt on him kindly while he struggled to explain his mission. All the dread of the unusual, all the inherited belief in the sanct.i.ty of fixed opinions, all the pa.s.sionate distrust of ideas that have not stood the test of centuries--these things which make for the safety and the permanence of the racial life, were in the look of motherly indulgence with which she regarded him. She had just risen from a rocking-chair on the long porch, where honest Tom sat relating ponderous war anecdotes to an attentive group of boarders; and beyond her in the dimly lighted hall he could see the wide old staircase climbing leisurely into the mysterious silence of the upper storeys.
"I have a small room at the back that I might rent to you," she said hesitatingly after a pause. "I am afraid you will find it warm in summer, as it is just under the roof and has a western exposure, but I hardly think I could do better for you at the price you are able to pay.
I understood that you intended to live with your uncle," she added in a burst of enthusiasm. "My husband has always been one of his greatest admirers."
The mention of Cyrus was like a spur to Oliver"s ambition, and he realized with grat.i.tude that it was merely his sensibility, not his resolution, which had been shaken.
"I"ll take the room," he returned, ignoring what she had said as well as what she had implied about Cyrus. Then as she tripped ahead of him, he entered the dismantled hall, filled with broken pieces of fine old furniture, and ascended the stairs as far as the third storey. When she turned a loosened door-k.n.o.b and pa.s.sed before him into the little room at the back, he saw first of all the narrow window, with its torn green shade, beyond which cl.u.s.tered a blur of silvery foliage in the midst of red roofs and huddled chimneys. From this hilltop, he could look down unseen on that bit of the universal life which was Dinwiddie. He could watch the town at work and at play; he could see those twenty-one thousand souls either moved as a unit by the secret forces which ignore individuality, or separated and enclosed by that impenetrable wall of personality which surrounded each atom among them. He could follow the divisions of cla.s.s and the still deeper divisions of race as they were symbolized in the old brick walls, overgrown with young gra.s.ses, which girdled the ancient gardens in High Street. From the dazzling glimpses of white muslin under honeysuckle arbours, to the dusky forms that swarmed like sp.a.w.n in the alleys, the life of Dinwiddie loved, hated, enjoyed, and suffered beneath him. And over this love and this hatred, this enjoyment and this suffering, there presided--an outward and visible sign of the triumph of industrialism--the imposing brick walls of the new Treadwell tobacco factory.
A soft voice spoke in his ear, and turning, he looked into the face of Mrs. Peachey, whom he had almost forgotten.
"You will find the sun warm in the afternoon, I am afraid," she murmured, still with her manner of pleasantly humouring him which he found later to be an unconscious expression of her half maternal, wholly feminine att.i.tude toward his s.e.x.
"Oh, I daresay it will be all right," he responded. "I shall work so hard that I shan"t have time to bother about the weather."
Leaving the window, he gazed around the little room with an impulse of curiosity. Who had lived here before him? A clerk? A travelling salesman? Perhaps one of the numerous indigent gentlewomen that formed so large and so important a part of the population of Dinwiddie? The walls were smeared with a sickly blue wash, and in several places there were the marks left from the pictures of the preceding lodger. An old mahogany bureau, black with age and ill usage, stood crosswise in the corner behind the door, and reflected in the dim mirror he saw his own face looking back at him. A film of dust lay over everything in the room, over the muddy blue of the walls, over the strip of discoloured matting on the floor, over the few fine old pieces of furniture, fallen now into abject degradation. The handsome French bed, placed conveniently between door and window, stood naked to the eyes, with its cheap husk mattress rolled half back, and its bare slats, of which the two middle ones were tied together with rope, revealing conspicuously its descent from elegance into squalor. As he saw it, the room was the epitome of tragedy, yet in the centre of it, on one of the battered and broken-legged Heppelwhite chairs, sat Mrs. Peachey, rosy, plump, and pretty, regarding him with her slightly quizzical smile. "Yes, life, of course, is sad if you stop to think about it," her smile seemed to a.s.sure him; "but the main thing, after all, is to be happy in spite of it."
"Do you wish to stay here to-night?" she asked, seeing that he had put down his bag.
"If you will let me. But I am afraid it will be inconvenient."
She shook her head. "Not if you don"t mind the dust. The room has been shut up for weeks, and the dust is so dreadful in the spring. The servants have gone out," she added, "but I"ll bring you some sheets for your bed, and you can fill your pitcher from the spout at the end of the hall. Only be careful not to stumble over the step there. It is hard to see when the gas is not lit."
"You won"t object to my putting shelves around the walls?" he asked, while she pushed the mattress into place with the light and condescending touch of one who preserves the aristocratic manner not only in tragedy, but even in toil. It was, indeed, her peculiar distinction, he came to know afterward, that she worked as gracefully as other women played.
"Couldn"t you find room enough without them?" she inquired while her gaze left the mattress and travelled dubiously to the mantelpiece. "It seems a pity for you to go to any expense about shelves, doesn"t it?"
"Oh, they won"t cost much. I"ll do the work myself, and I"ll do it in the mornings when it won"t disturb anybody. I daresay I"ll have to push that bed around a bit in order to make s.p.a.ce."
Something in his vibrant voice--so full of the richness and the buoyant energy of youth--made her look at him as she might have looked at one of her children, or at that overgrown child whom she had married. And just as she had managed Tom all his life by pretending to let him have his way, so she proceeded now by instinct to manage Oliver. "You dear boy! Of course you may turn things upside down if you want to. Only wait a few days until you are settled and have seen how you like it."
Then she tripped out with her springy step, which had kept its elasticity through war and famine, while Oliver, gazing after her, wondered whether it was philosophy or merely a love of pleasure that sustained her? Was it thought or the absence of thought that produced her wonderful courage?