Watch Yourself Go By.
by Al. G. Field.
Introductory
WATCH YOURSELF GO BY
Just stand aside and watch yourself go by; Think of yourself as "he" instead of "I."
Note closely, as in other men you note, The bag-kneed trousers and the seedy coat.
Pick the flaws; find fault; forget the man is you, And strive to make your estimate ring true; Confront yourself and look you in the eye-- Just stand aside and watch yourself go by.
Interpret all your motives just as though You looked on one whose aims you did not know.
Let undisguised contempt surge through you when You see you shirk, O commonest of men!
Despise your cowardice; condemn whate"er You note of falseness in you anywhere.
Defend not one defect that shames your eye-- Just stand aside and watch yourself go by.
And then, with eyes unveiled to what you loathe-- To sins that with sweet charity you"d clothe-- Back to your self-walled tenements you"ll go With tolerance for all who dwell below.
The faults of others then will dwarf and shrink, Love"s chain grow stronger by one mighty link-- When you, with "he" as subst.i.tute for "I,"
Have stood aside and watched yourself go by.
S. W. GILLILAND, in _Penberthy Engineer_.
"To whom will you dedicate your book?" inquired George Spahr.
Well, I hinted to my wife and Pearl that I desired to bestow that honor upon them. They did not exactly demur, but both intimated that I had best dedicate it to some friend in the far distance who would probably never read it, or to some dear friend who had pa.s.sed away and had no relatives living.
Several others approached did not seem to crave the honor, therefore I herewith dedicate this book to Court; not that he is the best and truest friend I ever possessed, but for the reason that should the book not be received with favor he will respect me just the same. He will hunt for me, he will watch for me, he will love me all the more devotedly, serve me all the more faithfully, though the book were discredited. The more I see of dogs, the better I like dogs.
It is claimed there is a kind of physiognomy in the t.i.tle of a book by which a skilful observer will know as well what to expect from its contents as one does reading the lines. I flatter myself this claim will be disproved in this book.
I am proud of the book, not that it contains much of literary merit, not that I ever hope it will be a "best seller," but for the reason it has afforded me days of enjoyment. In the writing of it I have communed with those whom I love.
If those who peruse this book extract half the pleasure from reading its pages that has come to me while writing them, I will be satisfied.
AL. G. FIELD.
Maple Villa Farm, July 4, 1912.
WATCH YOURSELF GO BY
AN AUTOBIOGRAPHY
CHAPTER ONE
Trust no prayer or promise, Words are grains of sand; To keep your heart unbroken Hold your child in hand.
"Al-f-u-r-d!" "Al-f-u-r-d!!" "Al-f-u-r-d!!!"
The last syllable, drawn out the length of an expiring breath, was the first sound recorded on the memory of the First Born. Indeed, constant repet.i.tion of the word, day to day, so filled his brain cells with "Al-f-u-r-d" that it was years after he realized his given patronymic was Alfred.
[Ill.u.s.tration: The Old Well]
"Al-f-u-r-d!" "Al-f-u-r-d!"--A woman"s voice, strong and penetrating, strengthened by years of voice culture in calling cows, sheep, pigs, chickens and other farm-yard companions. The voice came in swelling waves, growing in menace, from around the corner of as quaint an old farm-house as ever sheltered a happy family. In the wake of the voice followed a round, rosy woman of blood and brawn, with muscular arms and st.u.r.dy limbs that carried her over gra.s.s and gravel at a pace that soon brought her within reach of the prey pursued--a boy of four years, in flapping pantalets and gingham frock.
The "boy" was headed for the family well as fast as his toddling legs could carry him. Forbidden, punished, guarded, the child lost no opportunity to climb to the top of the square enclosure and wonderingly peer down into the depths of the well. To prevent his falling headlong to his death--a calamity frequently predicted--was the princ.i.p.al concern of all the family.
As the women folks were more often in the big kitchen than elsewhere, it became, as a matter of convenience, the daily prison of the First Born. The board, across the open doorway, and the eternal vigilance of his guards, did not prevent his starting several times daily on a pilgrimage towards the old well. The turning of a head, the absence of the guards from the kitchen for a moment, were the looked-for opportunities--crawling under or over the wooden bar, and starting in childish glee for the old well.
Previous to the time of this narrative, the race invariably resulted in the capture of "young hopeful" ere the well was reached. The shrill cry: "Al-f-u-r-d!" "Al-f-u-r-d!" always closely followed by the young woman who did the scouting for the other guards, brought him to a halt. He was lifted bodily, thrown high into the air, caught in strong, loving arms as he came down, roughly hugged and good-naturedly spanked, and carried triumphantly back to his prison--the kitchen. Here, seated upon the floor, he was roundly lectured by three women, who in turn charged one another with his escape. It was never _his_ fault. Someone had turned a head to look at the clock, or the browning bread in the oven, turning to look at the cause of the controversy, not infrequently he was found astride the prison bar, or scampering down the path.
That old well, or its counterpart, was surely the inspiration of "_The Old Oaken Bucket_." However, their author was never imbued with fascination as alluring as that which influenced the First Born in his desire to solve the, to him, mystery of the old well.
The more his elders coaxed, bribed and threatened, the more vividly they depicted its dangers, the more determined he became to explore its darkened depths. The old well became a part of the child"s life. He talked of it by day and dreamed of it by night. The big windla.s.s, with its coil of seemingly never-ending chain, winding and unwinding, lowering and raising the old, oaken bucket green with age, full and flowing; the cooling water oozing between the age-warped staves, nurturing the green gra.s.ses growing about the box-like enclosure. How cooling the gra.s.s was to his feet as on tip-toes peeking over the top of the enclosure down into that which seemed to his childish imagination a fathomless abyss, so deep that ray of sun or glint of moon never penetrated to the surface of the water. The clanging of the chain, the grinding of the heavy bucket b.u.mping against the walled circle as it descended, and the splash as it struck the water, were uncanny sounds to the boy"s ears. The desire to look down, down into the old well"s hidden secrets became to him almost a frenzy. The echoes coming up from its shadowy depths were as those of a haunted glen.
He reasoned that all men and women were created to guard the well and that it was his only duty in life to thwart them.
Balmy spring, with its song birds, buzzing bees and sweet-smelling blossoms, coaxed every living thing out of doors; everything, except the First Born and his guards.
Such was the situation when the bees swarmed. The guards "p.r.i.c.ked up their ears," then, with eyes looking heavenward, and s.n.a.t.c.hing up tin pans which they beat with spoons, sleigh-bells and other objects, they rushed from the kitchen to work the usual charm of the country folk in settling the swarming bees.
Thus unguarded, the little prisoner, carrying a three-legged stool that aided him in surmounting the bar across the kitchen door, trekked for the old well. Planting the stool at one side of the square enclosure, he looked down into the cavernous depths; leaning far over, reached for the chain, with the intention of lowering the bucket, as he had often seen his elders do.
"Al-f-u-r-d!" "Al-f-u-r-d!"
And the sound of hurrying feet only urged the boy on. He had caught hold of the bucket and was leaning far over the dark opening when he felt a heavy hand upon his shoulders, and himself lifted from his high perch, only to be dropped sprawling on the ground with a shower of tin pans rattling about his devoted head. Then the women, half fainting from fright, fell upon him, each in a desperate effort to first embrace him in thankfulness over his rescue from falling into the well.
When the women recovered their "shock" the First Born was l.u.s.tily yelling for papa. Mamma had him across her knee and was administering the first full-fledged, unalloyed spanking of his childish existence. He scarcely understood at first, then the full meaning of the threats the guards had used to cure him of his one absorbing mania began sifting into his brain through another part of his anatomy. He promised never, never again to peep into the old well. The guards believed him and for days thereafter he lived blissfully on their praises, while everyone, directly or indirectly interested, conceded that mamma"s "spanks" had finally broken the charm of the old well for the boy.
However, the little prisoner was removed to another cell--the big, front room upstairs--the door securely locked. A large, open window looked out upon the front yard and below the window near the house was the old well.
One evening the men, returning from the field, halted to slake their thirst at the well, the up-coming of the old oaken bucket brought from its depths a half-knit woolen sock and a ball of yarn. A strand of yarn reaching to the window above told the story.
Later, a turkey wing, used as a fan in summer and to furnish wind for an obdurate wood fire in winter, was found limply swimming in the bucket.
Indeed, for days thereafter, divers articles, missed from the big, front room, accompanied the bucket on its return trips. When one of grandpap"s well-worn Sunday boots was brought to the surface, it was believed that the last of the missing articles from the big room had been recovered.
However, the disappearance of grandma"s little mantelpiece clock was never explained.
Uncle Joe and Aunt Betsy stopped their old mare in front of the house and in chorus shouted "h.e.l.lo!" as was the custom of neighbors pa.s.sing on their way to or from town. The whole family, including "Al-f-u-r-d,"
betook themselves to the roadside to gossip. "Al-f-u-r-d," busy as usual, clambered up over the muddy wheels into the vehicle. He was praised by uncle and aunt for his obedience, and promised candy when they returned from town. Clambering down he missed his footing and narrowly escaped being trampled upon by the old mare who was vigorously stamping and swishing her tail to keep off the flies.
Dragged from under the buggy he was soon out of the minds of the gossiping group, curiosity drew him to the old well. Circling it at a respectful distance, he said:
"Naughty ole well, don"t thry to coax me "caus I won"t play with you, nor look down in you never no more. There!"