【10】
After enduring until the later half of the night, I also could not resist anymore as I leaned on a pillar and began to fall asleep. Prince Wumin probably had already slept for more than half the day, so he wasn’t sleepy. He only instructed: “You sleep first. When it’s time, I’ll be leaving and will wake you up. You must be kneeling when you do, or else it wouldn’t look like you were doing it.
I nodded: “Okay.”
I actually slept really peacefully this time, probably because I felt that Prince Wumin could ward off evil spirits, so I was especially at ease. When he woke me up, I slightly opened my eyes, but it was still dark out.
“How long did I sleep for?” I rub my eyes with a bit of dissatisfaction.
“Not even four hours.” Prince Wumin said, “I need to go now, you should go kneel now.”
I nodded: “Okay.”
He sneakily went out over the window without making the smallest of sound. This scene reminded me of the previous me who had infiltrated the West Yang imperial palace, it was the same…
I sat on the ground for most of the night, so my legs were a bit numb. I knelt until the Grand Adviser and them came to get me, and I indeed was unable to stand. When they saw me like that, I’d reckon that they really believed that I had kneeled for the entire night. They were all moved to tears and said that I was very loyal.
Even though the Emperor’s official inner and outer coffins were quickly being made overnight, they were still not done yet, so the Grand Adviser and them told me to go rest first. This was exactly my intention. I returned to the Heaven Palming Palace and soaked in the basin for a while, and then called for some palace maids to help me hammer my leg. Slowly after that, the soreness and ache in my leg gradually faded. Prince Wumin had also come over and quietly sat to the side while watching me. He didn’t say a single thing.
After everyone had left, before I even had time to say something to Prince Wumin, the Grand Adviser and them came back, saying that I had to go look at the funeral items that would be buried with the emperor. I brought Prince Wumin along with me to do so, and it took until the event to almost finish the preparations. The official inner and outer coffins were also finished, so I had to change into the Emperor’s distinctive funeral clothes and sat in a palanquin going towards the Emperor’s tomb with a large stack of funeral items and stone figures.
After a bunch of messes later, my head felt like it was going to split open, but it ended up to be quite relaxing for Prince Wumin. When I returned to the Heaven Palming Palace, he wasn’t in that little room, rather, he was sitting quite comfortably in the Heaven Palming Palace’s first wife’s large bed while contently cracking melon seeds between his teeth.
I seriously couldn’t vent out my anger. Not caring that he was on the bed, I threw myself directly on the bed and said: “You’re looking quite comfortable…”
Prince Wumin shot me a smile: “I am indeed comfortable.”
I glared at him: “Don’t think that I don’t hit women!”
Prince Wumin moved his face over: “Hit me then.”
I looked at my own face and was unable to do it. Barely suppressing the fire in my heart and not able to restrain it any longer, I could only bury my head into the blanket to cool down.
Prince Wumin laughed: “If one saw the prince of a country throw such a childish tantrum, wouldn’t it cause them laugh their head off?”
After speakng, he used his hand to pick up a melon seed kernel and put it near my mouth: “Eat it.”
I looked at him with suspicion: “You shouldn’t have poisoned this, right?”
He laughed weirdly, and then tossed the melon seed kernel in his mouth. He said while chewing on the side: “I can’t bear to poison my own body to death, just like how you can’t bear to hit your own body.”
I said: “That may not be the case, what if you suddenly go crazy?”
Prince Wumin yawned: “Did you finish everything?”
“Mn.” I nodded, “Today is the first day, tomorrow is the official ascension.”
Prince Wumin said: “The first thing you should do after ascending the throne is to demote the King of Xiuyi’s entire family into commoners.”
“Mn.” I understood what it meant to establish one’s authority.
Prince Wumin glanced at me: “Then let’s sleep.”
“…Ah?” It took me a while to react, “Together?”
Prince Wumin yawned again: “It’s not like we have those kinds of intentions with each other.”
“That’s true, but it wouldn’t look too good.”
Prince Wumin was difficult: “Then that’s not my problem. I’m not used to the bed in the little lodge outside, it’s too hard.”
I expressed my understanding: “Then I’ll tell some servants to help you add an additional ten blankets.”
“That’s just too hot.”
“…”
“Besides, it’s also too small, too narrow, and too low…” He chattered on and on as he fussed until I helplessly lifted the blanket: “Just sleep, stop talking…”
Prince Wumin laughed with contentment and then laid down. As I looked at my own face, I discovered that I wasn’t really uncomfortable with it… humanity’s ability to adapt is truly a bit frightening.
Because I had been really tired these past days, I quickly fell asleep. Because n.o.body was going to call me up early on the second day, I had a comfortable sleep. When I woke up, the sky was already bright. Right when I was about to get up, something felt a bit wrong…
Prince Wumin had already woken up, and was sitting next to the bed, looking at who knows what. Seeing that I was awake, he asked: “You’re awake?”
I glared at him: “Pervert…”
Prince Wumin had on an unfathomable expression: “Why are you calling me names out of nowhere… If we were to say who the pervert is between us, you would be the pervert…”
I bit my lips: “Your body…”
Seeing that I was so stiff, Prince Wumin got it, and coughed: “Err, that, normal healthy men would usually wake up with that reaction, err, you…”
I looked at him with a plaintive expression: “Do you have any good ideas yet, it’s really uncomfortable…”
Prince Wumin said hesitantly: “I usually call for a palace maid…”
“I don’t want to!” I shook my head as if my life depended on it.
“Or, use your right hand…”
I seriously wanted to cry now: “Isn’t there a third option? I’ll definitely do it!”
“Then, use your left hand…” He said somewhat hesitantly.
“……………………”
Prince Wumin said helplessly: “Then just leave it like that, it’ll get better over time. If you really can’t take it, take a cold water bath.”
“It’s the cold season, alright…” I laid down on the bed, “I’ll just leave it…”
Prince Wumin nodded his head: “Now do you know the pains of being a man?”
I was a bit angry: “You men are exactly as unbearable as this…”
Prince Wumin said with a “tch”: “You saying that is just not fair. When you women become emotional, there isn’t even a hint of warning before that.”
“…” I lifted the blanket and used it to cover my head, “I don’t want to talk to you anymore!”
Prince Wumin laughed softly and then didn’t speak anymore
After a while, I felt that the place down there didn’t really cool down much, so I exposed my head and looked at Prince Wumin: “Prince Wumin, I thought up of a permanent surefire method.”
The corner of Prince Wumin’s mouth slightly curled up: “You don’t need to tell me, I feel like I won’t consent…”
“We’ll simply make it so that it can’t do anything anymore, then when we switch back, we’ll…” I ignored him and just said it aloud.
Prince Wumin coldly laughed and pointed at himself, which was also my body’s chest, then pointed at me, which was also the lower part of his body, and said: “A total of three heads, you have two and I have one. They’ll stand and fall together, do what you like!”
I stared blankly for a long while. Only until I felt the heat in my lower body rush to my face did I shriek and shove him away: “Stinkin’ pervert, get lost!!!”
Prince Wumin bursted into loud laughter and said quite meaningfully: “Let’s just get along, shall we? Hahahaha…”
“…”
I’m definitely going to find a man!