After a fortnight, this ill-humor began to soften in the glowing warmth of her heart, which was striving to rea.s.sert itself, and the desire to see Brandon began to get the better of her sense of injury.
Brandon, tired of this everlasting watchfulness to keep himself out of temptation, and, dreading at any moment that lapse from strength which is apt to come to the strongest of us, had resolved to quit his place at court and go to New Spain at once. He had learned, upon inquiry, that a ship would sail from Bristol in about twenty days, and another six weeks later. So he chose the former and was making his arrangements to leave as soon as possible.
He told me of his plans and spoke of his situation: "You know the reason for my going," he said, "even if I have never spoken of it. I am not much of a Joseph, and am very little given to running away from a beautiful woman, but in this case I am fleeing from death itself.
And to think what a heaven it would be. You are right, Caskoden; no man can withstand the light of that girl"s smile. I am unable to tell how I feel toward her. It sometimes seems that I can not live another hour without seeing her; yet, thank G.o.d, I have reason enough left to know that every sight of her only adds to an already incurable malady.
What will it be when she is the wife of the king of France? Does it not look as if wild life in New Spain is my only chance?"
I a.s.sented as we joined hands, and our eyes were moist as I told him how I should miss him more than anyone else in all the earth--excepting Jane, in mental reservation.
I told Jane what Brandon was about to do, knowing full well she would tell Mary; which she did at once.
Poor Mary! The sighs began to come now, and such small vestiges of her ill-humor toward Brandon as still remained were frightened off in a hurry by the fear that she had seen the last of him.
She had not before fully known that she loved him. She knew he was the most delightful companion she had ever met, and that there was an exhilaration about his presence which almost intoxicated her and made life an ecstasy, yet she did not know it was love. It needed but the thought that she was about to lose him to make her know her malady, and meet it face to face.
Upon the evening when Mary learned all this, she went into her chamber very early and closed the door. No one interrupted her until Jane went in to robe her for the night, and to retire. She then found that Mary had robed herself and was lying in bed with her head covered, apparently asleep. Jane quietly prepared to retire, and lay down in her own bed. The girls usually shared one couch, but during Mary"s ill-temper she had forced Jane to sleep alone.
After a short silence Jane heard a sob from the other bed, then another, and another.
"Mary, are you weeping?" she asked.
"Yes."
"What is the matter, dear?"
"Nothing," with a sigh.
"Do you wish me to come to your bed?"
"Yes, I do." So Jane went over and lay beside Mary, who gently put her arms about her neck.
"When will he leave?" whispered Mary, shyly confessing all by her question.
"I do not know," responded Jane, "but he will see you before he goes."
"Do you believe he will?"
"I know it;" and with this consolation Mary softly wept herself to sleep.
After this, for a few days, Mary was quiet enough. Her irritable mood had vanished, but Jane could see that she was on the lookout for some one all the time, although she made the most pathetic little efforts to conceal her watchfulness.
At last a meeting came about in this way: Next to the king"s bed-chamber was a luxuriously furnished little apartment with a well-selected library. Here Brandon and I often went, afternoons, to read, as we were sure to be undisturbed.
Late one day Brandon had gone over to this quiet retreat, and having selected a volume, took his place in a secluded little alcove half hidden in arras draperies. There was a cushioned seat along the wall and a small diamond-shaped window to furnish light.
He had not been there long when in came Mary. I can not say whether she knew Brandon was there or not, but she was there and he was there, which is the only thing to the point, and finding him, she stepped into the alcove before he was aware of her presence.
Brandon was on his feet in an instant, and with a low bow was backing himself out most deferentially, to leave her in sole possession if she wished to rest.
"Master Brandon, you need not go. I will not hurt you. Besides, if this place is not large enough for us both, I will go. I would not disturb you." She spoke with a tremulous voice and a quick, uneasy glance, and started to move backward out of the alcove.
"Lady Mary, how can you speak so? You know--you must know--oh! I beg you--" But she interrupted him by taking his arm and drawing him to a seat beside her on the cushion. She could have drawn down the Colossus of Rhodes with the look she gave Brandon, so full was it of command, entreaty and promise.
"That"s it; I don"t know, but I want to know; and I want you to sit here beside me and tell me. I am going to be reconciled with you, despite the way you treated me when last we met. I am going to be friends with you whether you will or not. Now what do you say to that, sir?" She spoke with a fluttering little laugh of uneasy non-a.s.surance, which showed that her heart was not nearly so confident nor so bold as her words would make believe. Poor Brandon, usually so ready, had nothing "to say to that," but sat in helpless silence.
Was this the sum total of all his wise determinations made at the cost of so much pain and effort? Was this the answer to all his prayers, "Lead me not into temptation"? He had done his part, for he had done all he could. Heaven had not helped him, since here was temptation thrust upon him when least expected, and when the way was so narrow he could not escape, but must meet it face to face.
Mary soon recovered her self-possession--women are better skilled in this art than men--and continued:
"I am not intending to say one word about your treatment of me that day over in the forest, although it was very bad, and you have acted abominably ever since. Now is not that kind in me?" And she softly laughed as she peeped up at the poor fellow from beneath those sweeping lashes, with the premeditated purpose of tantalizing him, I suppose. She was beginning to know her power over him, and it was never greater than at this moment. Her beauty had its sweetest quality, for the princess was sunk and the woman was dominant, with flushed face and flashing eyes that caught a double l.u.s.ter from the glowing love that made her heart beat so fast. Her gown, too, was the best she could have worn to show her charms. She must have known Brandon was there, and must have dressed especially to go to him. She wore her favorite long flowing outer sleeve, without the close fitting inner one. It was slit to the shoulder, and gave entrancing glimpses of her arms with every movement, leaving them almost bare when she lifted her hands, which was often, for she was as full of gestures as a Frenchwoman. Her bodice was cut low, both back and front, showing her large perfectly molded throat and neck, like an alabaster pillar of beauty and strength, and disclosing her bosom just to its shadowy incurving, white and billowy as drifted snow. Her hair was thrown back in an attempt at a coil, though, like her own rebellious nature, it could not brook restraint, and persistently escaped in a hundred little curls that fringed her face and lay upon the soft white nape of her neck like fluffy shreds of sun-lit floss on new cut ivory.
With the mood that was upon her, I wonder Brandon maintained his self-restraint even for a moment. He felt that his only hope lay in silence, so he sat beside her and said nothing. He told me long afterwards that while sitting there in the intervals between her speech, the oddest, wildest thoughts ran through his brain. He wondered how he could escape. He thought of the window, and that possibly he might break away through it, and then he thought of feigning illness, and a hundred other absurd schemes, but they all came to nothing, and he sat there to let events take their own course as they seemed determined to do in spite of him.
After a short silence, Mary continued, half banteringly: "Answer me, sir! I will have no more of this. You shall treat me at least with the courtesy you would show a bourgeoise girl."
"Oh, that you were only a burgher"s daughter."
"Yes, I know all that; but I am not. It can"t be helped, and you shall answer me."
"There is no answer, dear lady--I beg you--oh, do you not see--"
"Yes, yes; but answer my question; am I not kind--more than you deserve?"
"Indeed, yes; a thousand times. You have always been so kind, so gracious and so condescending to me that I can only thank you, thank you, thank you," answered Brandon, almost shyly; not daring to lift his eyes to hers.
Mary saw the manner quickly enough--what woman ever missed it, much less so keen-eyed a girl as she--and it gave her confidence, and brought back the easy banter of her old time manner.
"How modest we have become! Where is the boldness of which we used to have so much? Kind? Have I always been so? How about the first time I met you? Was I kind then? And as to condescension, don"t--don"t use that word between us."
"No," returned Brandon, who, in his turn, was recovering himself, "no, I can"t say that you were very kind at first. How you did fly out at me and surprise me. It was so unexpected it almost took me off my feet," and they both laughed in remembering the scene of their first meeting. "No, I can"t say your kindness showed itself very strongly in that first interview, but it was there nevertheless, and when Lady Jane led me back, your real nature a.s.serted itself, as it always does, and you were kind to me; kind as only you can be."
That was getting very near to the sentimental; dangerously near, he thought; and he said to himself: "If this does not end quickly I shall have to escape."
"You are easily satisfied if you call that good," laughingly returned Mary. "I can be ever so much better than that if I try."
"Let me see you try," said Brandon.
"Why, I"m trying now," answered Mary with a distracting little pout.
"Don"t you know genuine out-and-out goodness when you see it? I"m doing my very best now. Can"t you tell?"
"Yes, I think I recognize it; but--but--be bad again."
"No, I won"t! I will not be bad even to please you; I have determined not to be bad and I will not--not even to be good. This," placing her hand over her heart, "is just full of "good" to-day," and her lips parted as she laughed at her own pleasantry.
"I am afraid you had better be bad--I give you fair warning," said Brandon huskily. He felt her eyes upon him all the time, and his strength and good resolves were oozing out like wine from an ill-coppered cask. After a short silence Mary continued, regardless of the warning:
"But the position is reversed with us; at first I was unkind to you, and you were kind to me, but now I am kind to you and you are unkind to me."
"I can come back at you with your own words," responded Brandon. "You don"t know when I am kind to you. I should be kinder to myself, at least, were I to leave you and take myself to the other side of the world."