She read on, their small bodies warm, their giggles sweet to her ears. Both girls smelled of soap and minty toothpaste. They worenighties and fluffy socks to keep their toes warm. When she finished and asked if they wanted another story, two vigorous nods were her answer.
Since they"d visited the library just that afternoon and chosen twenty books, she imagined story time would go on for a cozy half hour or more. It was her idea of bliss.
The only mildly discomfiting note was Adam"s presence, and she didn"t find it nearly as disturbing as she would have a month before. Familiarity bred ... well, not indifference, unfortunately, but something almost as good: near trust. Even liking.
This was the fourth visit since they"d agreed on these overnight stays. Counting,Lynnrealized in amazement that over three months had pa.s.sed since that first time when Adam had walked into her bookstore with Rose holding his hand.
Tonight he was reading in what she"d learned was his favorite chair, brown distressed leather with wide arms and a big ottoman for his feet. The newspaper rustled as he turned pages. Once, when the girls got a good belly laugh from the story,Lynnglanced up and saw him smiling as he watched them over the paper. A month ago, his smile would have died. Now their gazes met in mutual understanding and even a degree of warmth before she turned the page and continued the story.
The third book told of a boy"s relationship with a beloved uncle who was a navy captain. It was about the celebration of homecoming and the sadness of goodbyes. WhenLynnclosed the book, Rose took her thumb from her mouth.
"I don"t want you to go tomorrow."
Lynnwrapped an arm around her and squeezed. "Oh, sweetie, I"m going to miss you, too."
"How come you have to go?"
The newspaper had quit rustling. Aware of Adam listening,Lynnsaid, "We live inOtterBeach. If I"m not there, who will open the bookstore?"
"Can"t we stay longer, Mommy?" Sh.e.l.ly asked from her other side.
Lynnlet the book slide to the floor and put her other arm around her daughter. "You know we can"t, sweetie."
"But why?" Sh.e.l.ly pleaded.
"These are just visits. Rose and Adam will be coming to see us soon. Maybe we can all make a sand castle again. Remember the first time?"
"Can we go tomorrow, Daddy?" Rose begged.
Adam lowered theOregonian . "No, Rosebud, we can"t. You know I have to work. Grown-ups have responsibilities."
She cried pa.s.sionately, "I hate "sponsibil...bil..."
"Let"s enjoy the visit while we can," he suggested. "We have fun when Lynn and Sh.e.l.ly come to stay.
Don"t spoil it by being sad. The boy in the storyLynnjust read to you wasn"t always sad when he was with his uncle, even though he knew he"d have to say goodbye, was he?"
She pouted, teardrops trembling on her lashes. "No," she finally whispered, tremulously.
The telephone rang and Adam groaned.
Picking it up, he said, "Yeah? Oh, Mom. Hi, how are you?" After a moment, he nodded. "I"ll put Rose on for a second."
He crossed the room and handed Rose the cordless phone. "Say hi to Grandma McCloskey."
Not his mother, then, but Jennifer"s.
Rose whispered a shy h.e.l.lo. After a moment she said, "I have a friend here. We"re listening to stories."
Adam"s hand shot out. "Okay, say bye now."
"Daddy says I gotta go. Bye," she managed to say, before he whipped the phone out of her hand.
Covering the mouthpiece, he said, "I"ll go talk out in the kitchen."
"My grandma calls, too," Sh.e.l.ly told her friend. "She"s comin" to see us."
"At Christmas,"Lynnagreed. "In fact, she"ll be here in only seven days."
"My grandma comes at Christmas, too. She says she"s gonna bring lots of presents." Rose sounded satisfied if not excited.
"My grandma, too!"
From the kitchen, Adam"s voice rose in an angry rumble. "What are you saying? Are you threatening me?"
To cover it,Lynnsaid brightly, "I"ll tell you what. Why don"t we take the books up and read some more stories in Rose"s bed?"
"Okeydoke," Sh.e.l.ly said, hopping up with alacrity.
"But maybe Daddy wanted to listen," Rose said more doubtfully.
Lynnwrinkled her nose. "It sounds like your daddy is talking to someone else now. He"s kind of mad, huh? Does business make him that way? He can come upstairs when he"s done." He did appear eventually, after ten or twelve more books. Both girls were getting sleepy, and whenLynn saw him in the doorway she set down the book. "Bedtime."
"Read another one!" Sh.e.l.ly protested, but the words slurred.
"Dream a story,"Lynnmurmured. "About an ugly princess and..."
"No, a beautiful one," Sh.e.l.ly interrupted. ""CuzI"m beautiful, aren"t I?"
Rose took her thumb from her mouth. "Me, too."
"You"re both beautiful." She kissed them and stood up, pa.s.sing Adam mid-room.
She went downstairs without pausing, leaving Adam to tuck their daughters in.Trade about , she thought, even as she missed the quiet ritual of turning on the night-light, smoothing the sheet over the blankets, breathing in the sleepy essence of two small girls as she touched her lips to smooth foreheads. She"d had all evening. From the rage she"d heard in his voice and the tension in the set of his shoulders, he needed any comfort they could give him.
They"d had dinner earlier with Rose and Sh.e.l.ly, but she poured two cups of coffee and helped herself to a second, sinful slice of lemon meringue pie from the bakery. When Adam came into the kitchen, she waved the knife at the pie. "Would you like a piece, too?"
"What? Oh. No."
She put the pie in the refrigerator. He was leaning against the island, frowning into s.p.a.ce.
"Is something wrong?"Lynnasked.
His glower turned her way. "Wrong?"
"You were ... um, yelling."
His eyes seemed to clear as if he were noticing her for the first time. "Oh, my G.o.d. Could you hear everything?"
"Just something about a threat. I don"t think the girls did."
His head bowed suddenly and he pinched the bridge of his nose. "That was my mother-in-law. As you probably gathered. They figured out that Sh.e.l.ly must be visiting, and they wanted to come over. If not tonight, tomorrow."
"You said no."
Adam swore. "They"d swarm over her like yellow jackets on jam. I can"t make them understand why we should move slowly. They only know one thing they want their granddaughter. Jenny is gone, and Sh.e.l.ly is all they have left, Angela keeps saying. She"s like a G.o.dd.a.m.n broken record." He breathed out heavily.
Pie and coffee forgotten, apprehension rising,Lynnasked, "What did you mean about her threatening?"
His gaze met hers, and she read in it both apology and anger. "She says they"re considering filing for a court order giving them visitation rights if not custody."
"Custody?"Lynnsagged back a step.
"They wouldn"t get it." His face looked haggard, but his voice was strong. "We"re the parents. I"m behind you. Their lawyer will tell them to forget it."
"But they might get visitation."
"I don"t know." He hammered his fist on the tile countertop. "d.a.m.n them!"
"No. Don"t say that." Perhaps the time was coming,Lynnthought, when they would have to tell Rose and Sh.e.l.ly the truth. Would it really be so hurtful now? If they were a.s.sured that nothing would change? "I understand how they must feel. It"s not so different than what we"ve both gone through."
"They"re a complication we don"t need."
"No."Lynnmanaged a smile of sorts. "I poured you some coffee."
She took her own to the table in the nook, and after a moment Adam followed her. This was only the third night she"d spent in this house, and yet these few minutes after the girls had gone to bed already felt familiar. They couldn"t talk in front of Rose and Sh.e.l.ly. This was their time. They sat in silence for a moment,Lynnmaking a production of stirring sugar into her coffee. Then unexpectedly, Adam said, "I wish you weren"t going tomorrow, too."
She quashed a momentary thrill. He didn"t mean her, he meant Sh.e.l.ly. "These visits have been nice, haven"t they?"
"You"re good with them."
She sneaked a look. The lines still between his brows, he was staring down into his coffee as if waiting for pictures of the future to form.
"Thank you." "You ever considered opening a bookstore inPortland?" "And competing with Powell"s?" The famous bookstore filled a whole city block. "I don"t think so." He frowned at her. "If you lived closer, we could see our daughters more often." "You could move toOtterBeach." "You know that"s impossible," Adam said impatiently. What was this all about? "I have an established business," she said reasonably. "Moving wouldn"t be any easier for me."
"What if you could find a bookstore for sale over here? Or a good location to start one up?"
She set down her fork. "You"re serious."
"d.a.m.n straight." He took a swallow of coffee with the air of a man tossing back a shot of whiskey.
"Aren"t you getting tired of these teary goodbyes, too?"
"Of course I am, but..."
"But what?" He leaned forward, his expression persuasive. "Think about it. Will you do that?"
"Do you have any idea how tough it was to start up a small business?"
Adam opened his mouth, but she overrode him.
"Without my parents" help, Sh.e.l.ly and I would have starved,"Lynnsaid fiercely. "Ninety percent of small
businesses don"t make it. I did. And you want me to throw that away. Start all over. It"s just not that easy!" He wasn"t ready to give up yet, she could see. He still leaned forward, intent on his perfect plan. "What if you found a going concern that"s for sale?Portlandhas plenty of suburbs that support bookstores."
"Sure it does. Some of those stores are a lot bigger than mine. I couldn"t affordthem, even a.s.suming I could conveniently find a buyer for my store at the snap of my fingers. Others ...well, independents are being driven out of business by the hundreds. Thousands. Online booksellers like Amazon.com are taking some business. That"s bad enough, but as you pointed out yourself, in a metropolitan area like this I"d have to worry about a Barnes & n.o.ble going in on the next block. Heck, B. Dalton and Waldenbooks are already at the mall. And you"ve got malls around here." She pushed away her half-eaten pie, her appet.i.te gone. "Take a look. Either the independents are big enough to compete, and are therefore out of my league, or they"re on the verge of bankruptcy. Trust me."
Adam sat back, his dark eyes not wavering from her face. After a moment, he said, "You could get a job."
"Sure I could. Working for someone else. Hey, maybe if I was lucky B. Dalton would hire me to be a manager! Golly. That would be a thrill after owning my own store."
His mouth twisted. "All right. You"ve convinced me. Bad idea."
"I am tired of saying goodbye. It"ll get worse once Rose knows I"m really Mommy and Sh.e.l.ly thinks of you as Daddy. But what can we do?" Now she was pleading with him. "We do have responsibilities."
"Sure we do," Adam said flatly. "One of mine is going to be pacifying Jennifer"s parents, convincing them to be patient."
She"d almost forgotten. "If you talked to them first, wouldn"t they be satisfied just meeting Sh.e.l.ly? For now?"
He closed his eyes wearily. "If only she didn"t look so d.a.m.ned much like Jenny."
"I"m sorry." She bit her lip. "I forget."
A razor edge of pain showed in his brown eyes. "I don"t."
Had his wife known how much she was loved? Once upon a time,Lynnhad fooled herself into believing she and Brian were in love, but even then she had known they weren"t soul mates, meant for each other through the centuries. But he was handsome, and he wanted her, and he made her laugh. Love was supposed to grow, wasn"t it? The grandest kind, she had always believed, was in the quiet clasp of gnarled hands that had known each other"s touch for sixty years or more. Why couldn"t she and Brian have that, if they worked at it?
Now she knew better. Perhaps the grandest love was the kind ripened by half a century or more together, but people couldn"t endure each other that long, didn"t care enough to hold on through hard times, if what they started with wasn"t more heartfelt than "he wanted me" and "he was handsome."
Adam, she guessed, had been lucky enough to know real love.
"You still miss her."Lynntouched the back of his hand.
"When I let myself."
His hand turned over, slowly, giving her time to withdraw. She didn"t. He gripped her hand gently, his so much larger, browner.Lynnlifted her gaze to see that he, too, was studying their hands.
"Tell me about your husband," Adam said unexpectedly. "Why did he think you"d been unfaithful?"
A sting of hurt cured her of any drift toward a romantic mood. She tried to yank her hand back, but he held on.
"I know you weren"t," he said. "Even I can see that you"re not the kind of woman who"d lie to her husband. So why couldn"t he?"