It was a cowardly letter Tony thought, a letter calculated to frighten her, bring her to subjection again as well as to gratify the writer"s own Byronic instinct for pose. He had behaved badly. He acknowledged it but claimed forgiveness on the grounds of love, his love for her which had been goaded to mad jealousy by her thoughtless unkindness, her love for him which would not desert him no matter what he did.
But pose or not, Tony was obliged to admit there was some truth in it all. Perhaps it was all true-too true. Even if he did not resort to the pistol as he threatened he would find other means of slaying his soul if not his body if she forsook him now. She could not do it. As he said she loved him too well. She had gone too far in the path to turn back now.
Ah why, why had she let it go so far? Why had she not listened to d.i.c.k, to Uncle Phil, to Carlotta, even to Miss Lottie? They had all told her there was no happiness for her in loving Alan Ma.s.sey. She knew it herself better than any of them could possibly know it. And yet she had to go on, for his sake, for her own because she loved him.
By this time she was no longer angry or resentful. She was just sorry--sorry for Alan--sorry for herself. She knew just as she had known all along that last night"s incident would not really make any difference. It would be put away in time with all the other things she had to forgive. She had eaten her pomegranate seeds. She could not escape the dark kingdom. She did not wish to.
Later came violets from d.i.c.k which she put in a vase on her desk beside Uncle Phil"s picture. But it was the fragrance and color of Alan"s roses that filled the room, and presently she sat down and wrote her ill-behaved lover a sweet, forgiving little note. She was sorry if she had been unkind. She had not meant to be. As for what happened it was too late to worry about it now. They had best forget it, if they could. He couldn"t very well apologize to d.i.c.k in person because he was already on his way to Mexico. There was no need of any penance. Of course she forgave him, knew he had not meant to hurt her, though he had horribly.
If he cared to do so he might take her to dinner tomorrow night--somewhere where they could dance. And in conclusion she was always his, Tony Holiday.
Both d.i.c.k and Alan were driven out of her mind later that day by the delightful and exciting interview over the tea table with Carol Clay.
Miss Clay was a charming hostess, drew the girl out without appearing to do so, got her to talk naturally about many things, her life with her father at army barracks, and with her uncle on her beloved Hill, of her friends and brothers, her college life, of books and plays. Plays took them to the Killarney Rose and once more Miss Clay expressed her pleasure in the girl"s rendering of one of her own favorite roles.
"You acted as if you had been playing Rose all your life," she added with a smile.
"Maybe I have," said Tony. "Rose is--a good deal like me. Maybe that is why I loved playing her so."
"I shouldn"t wonder. You are a real little actress, my dear. I wonder if you are ready to pay the price of it. It is bitterly hard work and it means giving up half the things women care for."
The speaker"s lovely eyes shadowed a little. Tony wondered what Carol Clay had given up, was giving up for her art to bring that look into them.
"I am not afraid. I am willing to work. I love it. And I--I am willing to give up a good deal."
"Lovers?" smiled Miss Clay.
"Must I? I thought actresses always had lovers, at least worshipers.
Can"t I keep the lovers, Miss Clay?" There was a flash of mischief in Tony"s eyes as she asked the important question.
"Better stick to worshipers. Lovers are risky. Husbands--fatal."
Tony laughed outright at that.
"I am willing to postpone the fatality," she murmured.
"I am glad to hear it for I lured you here to take you into a deep-laid plot. I suppose you did not suspect that it was Max Hempel who sent me to see you play Rose?"
"Mr. Hempel? I thought he had forgotten me."
"He never forgets any one in whom he is interested. He has had his eye on you ever since he saw you play Rosalind. He told me when he came back from that trip that I had a rival coming on."
"Oh, no!" Tony objected even in jest to such desecration.
"Oh, yes," smiled her hostess. "Max Hempel is a brutally frank person. He never spares one the truth, even the disagreeable truth. He has had his eye out for a new ingenue for a long time. Ingenues do get old--at least older you know."
"Not you," denied Tony.
"Even I, in time. I grant you not yet. It takes a degree of age and sophistication to play youth and innocence. We do it better as a rule at thirty than at twenty. We are far enough away from it to stand off and observe how it behaves and can imitate it better than if we still had it.
That is one reason I was interested in your Rose last night. You played like a little girl as Rose should. You looked like a little girl. But you couldn"t have given it that delightfully sure touch if you hadn"t been a little bit grown up. Do you understand?"
Tony nodded.
"I think so. You see I am--a little bit grown up."
"Don"t grow up any more. You are adorable as you are. But to business.
Have you seen my Madge?"
"In the "End of the Rainbow?" Yes, indeed. I love it. You like the part too, don"t you? You play it as if you did."
"I do. I like it better than any I have had since Rose. Did it occur to you that you would like to play Madge yourself?"
Tony blushed ingenuously.
"Well, yes, it did," she admitted half shyly. "Of course, I knew I couldn"t play it as you did. It takes years of experience and a real art like yours to do it like that, but I did think I"d like to try it and see what I could do."
Miss Clay nodded, well pleased.
"Of course you did. Why not? It is your kind of a role, just as Rose is.
You and I are the same types. Mr. Hempel has said that all along, ever since he saw your Rosalind. But I won"t keep you in suspense. The long and short of all this preliminary is--how would you like to be my understudy for Madge?"
"Oh, Miss Clay!" Tony gasped. "Do you think I could?"
"I know you could, my dear. I knew it all the time while I was watching you play Rose. Mr. Hempel has known it even longer. I went to see Rose to find out if there was a Madge in you. There is. I told Mr.
Hempel so this morning. He is brewing his contracts now so be prepared. Will you try it?"
"I"d love to if you and Mr. Hempel think I can. I promised Uncle Phil I would take a year of the school work though. Will I have to drop that?"
"I think so--most of it at least. You would have to be at the rehearsals usually which are in the morning. You might have to play Madge quite often then. There are reasons why I have to be away a great deal just now." Again the shadow, darkened the star"s eyes and a droop came to her mouth. "It isn"t even so impossible that you would be called upon to play before the real Broadway audience in fact. Understudies sometimes do you know."
Miss Clay was smiling now, but the shadow in her eyes had not lifted Tony saw.
"I am particularly anxious to get a good understudy started in immediately," the actress continued. "The one I had was impossible, did not get the spirit of the thing at all. It is absolutely essential to have some one ready and at once. My little daughter is in a sanitarium dying with an incurable heart leakage. There will be a time--probably within the next two months--when I shall have to be away."
Tony put out her hand and let it rest upon the other woman"s. There was compa.s.sion in her young eyes.
"I am so sorry," she said simply. "I didn"t know you had a daughter. Of course, I did know you weren"t really Miss Clay, that you were Mrs.
Somebody, but I didn"t think of your having children. Somehow we don"t remember actresses may be mothers too."
"The actresses remember it--sometimes," said Miss Clay with a tremulous little smile. "It isn"t easy to laugh when your heart is heavy, Miss Antoinette. It is all I can do to go on with "Madge" sometimes. I just have to forget--make myself forget I am a mother and a wife. Captain Carey, my husband, is in the British Army. He is in Flanders now, or was when I last heard."
"Oh, I don"t see how you can do it--play, I mean," sighed Tony aghast at this new picture the actress"s words brought up.
"One learns, my dear. One has to. An actress is two distinct persons.
One of her belongs to the public. The other is just a plain woman.
Sometimes I feel as if I were far more the first than I am the second.
There wouldn"t be any more contracts if I were not. But never mind that.
To come back to you. Mr. Hempel will send you a contract to-morrow. Will you sign it?"
"Yes, if Uncle Phil is willing. I"ll wire him to-night. I am almost positive he will say yes. He is very reasonable and he will see what a wonderful, wonderful chance this is for me. I can"t thank you enough, Miss Clay. It all takes my breath away. But I am grateful and so happy; you can"t imagine it."