FAITH. It"s quiet.
JOHNNY. Ha! I wonder if you"ve got the feeling I have. We"ve both had h.e.l.l, you know; I had three years of it, out there, and you"ve had three years of it here. The feeling that you can"t catch up; can"t live fast enough to get even.
FAITH nods.
Nothing"s big enough; nothing"s worth while enough--is it?
FAITH. I don"t know. I know I"d like to bite. She draws her lips back.
JOHNNY. Ah! Tell me all about your beastly time; it"ll do you good.
You and I are different from anybody else in this house. We"ve lived they"ve just vegetated. Come on; tell me!
FAITH, who up to now has looked on him as a young male, stares at him for the first time without s.e.x in her eyes.
FAITH. I can"t. We didn"t talk in there, you know.
JOHNNY. Were you fond of the chap who--?
FAITH. No. Yes. I suppose I was--once.
JOHNNY. He must have been rather a swine.
FAITH. He"s dead.
JOHNNY. Sorry! Oh, sorry!
FAITH. I"ve forgotten all that.
JOHNNY. Beastly things, babies; and absolutely unnecessary in the present state of the world.
FAITH. [With a faint smile] My baby wasn"t beastly; but I--I got upset.
JOHNNY. Well, I should think so!
FAITH. My friend in the manicure came and told me about hers when I was lying in the hospital. She couldn"t have it with her, so it got neglected and died.
JOHNNY. Um! I believe that"s quite common.
FAITH. And she told me about another girl--the Law took her baby from her. And after she was gone, I--got all worked up-- [She hesitates, then goes swiftly on] And I looked at mine; it was asleep just here, quite close. I just put out my arm like that, over its face--quite soft-- I didn"t hurt it. I didn"t really. [She suddenly swallows, and her lips quiver] I didn"t feel anything under my arm. And--and a beast of a nurse came on me, and said "You"ve smothered your baby, you wretched girl!"
I didn"t want to kill it--I only wanted to save it from living. And when I looked at it, I went off screaming.
JOHNNY. I nearly screamed when I saved my first German from living. I never felt the same again. They say the human race has got to go on, but I say they"ve first got to prove that the human race wants to. Would you rather be alive or dead?
FAITH. Alive.
JOHNNY. But would you have in prison?
FAITH. I don"t know. You can"t tell anything in there. [With sudden vehemence] I wish I had my baby back, though. It was mine; and I--I don"t like thinking about it.
JOHNNY. I know. I hate to think about anything I"ve killed, really.
At least, I should--but it"s better not to think.
FAITH. I could have killed that judge.
JOHNNY. Did he come the heavy father? That"s what I can"t stand. When they jaw a chap and hang him afterwards. Or was he one of the joking ones?
FAITH. I"ve sat in my cell and cried all night--night after night, I have. [With a little laugh] I cried all the softness out of me.
JOHNNY. You never believed they were going to hang you, did you?
FAITH. I didn"t care if they did--not then.
JOHNNY. [With a reflective grunt] You had a much worse time than I. You were lonely--
FAITH. Have you been in a prison, ever?
JOHNNY. No, thank G.o.d!
FAITH. It"s awfully clean.
JOHNNY. You bet.
FAITH. And it"s stone cold. It turns your heart.
JOHNNY. Ah! Did you ever see a stalact.i.te?
FAITH. What"s that?
JOHNNY. In caves. The water drops like tears, and each drop has some sort of salt, and leaves it behind till there"s just a long salt petrified drip hanging from the roof.
FAITH. Ah! [Staring at him] I used to stand behind my door. I"d stand there sometimes I don"t know how long. I"d listen and listen--the noises are all hollow in a prison. You"d think you"d get used to being shut up, but I never did.
JOHNNY utters a deep grunt.
It"s awful the feeling you get here-so tight and chokey. People who are free don"t know what it"s like to be shut up. If I"d had a proper window even--When you can see things living, it makes you feel alive.
JOHNNY. [Catching her arm] We"ll make you feel alive again.
FAITH stares at him; s.e.x comes back to her eyes. She looks down.
I bet you used to enjoy life, before.
FAITH. [Clasping her hands] Oh! yes, I did. And I love getting out now. I"ve got a fr-- [She checks herself] The streets are beautiful, aren"t they? Do you know Orleens Street?
JOHNNY. [Doubtful] No-o.... Where?
FAITH. At the corner out of the Regent. That"s where we had our shop.