"What do you mean?"
She shakes her head slowly and looks out the window to watch the cars pa.s.s.
"Nat, what do you know?" I hear the desperation in my voice, but I don"t care.
"Honestly, I don"t know anything about that meeting. Nate didn"t say anything about it. But what you"re describing... It just..." She frowns again and looks back at me. "Honey, I don"t think he had a choice."
What? We stare at each other for a long minute, our brains churning with what-ifs.
"Do you think...?" I stammer.
"I don"t know. Just do what he"s asking, sweetie. Call him."
Chapter Thirty Two.
After Natalie and I say our goodbyes, I drive back to Will"s house and pack my bags. It"s time to go home.
"Leaving me so soon?" Will asks dryly, leaning against the doorjamb with his arms crossed over his chest.
"It"s time to go home and pull it together."
"Good call, sis." He smiles at me, but his eyes still look worried.
"I"ll be okay," I rea.s.sure him.
"I don"t doubt it. But if you need anything, I"m here. We all are."
"I know." I throw the last of my things in the bag and zip it closed. "Thank you, Will. Really."
"I do have my moments, you know. Just don"t let the press know." He winks at me and I walk over to him and he opens his arms to give me a tight hug. "Gonna call him?"
"Yeah, when I get home."
"Good." He kisses my head and I pull back. "Come over for dinner next week. I"ll cook."
"Gag," I roll my eyes. "I"ll cook. You"ll poison me."
Will grins and lifts my suitcases and follows me out to my car.
I haven"t been home in four days, and it feels good to be here. I grab a water from the fridge and unpack my things, knowing that I"m procrastinating. I want to call Nate. I want to hear his s.e.xy voice. But I don"t know what to say.
Finally, when laundry has been done and put away and there"s nothing left to do, I pick up my iPhone and sit on the couch, staring at it. I bring up Nate"s number on speed dial and my thumb hovers over the green send b.u.t.ton but then I decide against it and power down the screen.
This needs to be done in person.
I climb the stairs to my bedroom and carefully choose an outfit of dark denim wide-leg jeans, a cornflower blue blouse that matches my eyes, and a black belt, cinching the blouse around my waist. I add my birthday diamond earrings, and black Louboutin stilettos.
I paint my clean face with a small amount of makeup, accenting my eyes and lips, and curl my hair in loose waves framing my face.
I drive to Nate"s without giving it too much thought so I don"t chicken out and go back home. His car and the bike are both in their parking spots, telling me that he"s home.
Good.
I use my usual parking s.p.a.ce and take the elevator to his floor.
I pause at his door, my stomach suddenly full of those mutant b.u.t.terflies again. G.o.d, what if he"s decided he doesn"t want to see me?
Instead of knocking, I use the key Nate gave me a few weeks ago and open the front door, stepping inside. The lights are on in the kitchen and living areas, and there is a fire roaring. There are several bouquets of pink roses throughout the s.p.a.ce, on the breakfast bar, on the dining room table, by the sofa.
No Nate.
Then I hear the voices.
I walk back toward the bedrooms and the voices get louder. They"re coming from Nate"s office. I stop, just out of sight, and listen.
"This is it, Audrey. This is the last time."
"Sure," she snorts. "You won"t be able to stay away from me for long, baby."
"After this, I want you to change your name."
"Change my name?" she asks incredulously. "What the f.u.c.k?"
"I don"t want you to have it anymore. I"ll make the arrangements; you"ll just have to sign the papers."
He"s making her change her name!
"Is this about that blonde tramp you"ve been f.u.c.king?"
And... that"s it.
I turn the corner so I can get a look into the room, and I"m transported back to Nate"s office last month. Audrey is perched on his desk, he"s scowling up at her, and she"s about to run her perfectly manicured hand down his face.
"Touch him and see how fast I have you on the ground," I warn quietly.
Both of them whip their heads toward me in surprise. Nate"s face registers shock, hope, and then wariness as he realizes what I"ve just witnessed.
Audrey grins and lets the palm of her hand make contact with his face.
I grin back. Nate backs out of Audrey"s touch and stands quickly.
"G.o.dd.a.m.n it, Audrey..."
"I warned you," I murmur as I stalk toward her. She hops off the desk and faces me head on, her brown eyes glaring at me.
"I"m not afraid of you."
I smile and c.o.c.k my head to the side. "You should be."
Her eyes go wide for a moment and then she glares at me again. "Nate doesn"t want you. You left him, remember?"
I slide my eyes over to Nate just as he b.a.l.l.s his hands into fists, his molten gray eyes on mine, and I know.
"Audrey, G.o.dd.a.m.n it, shut the f.u.c.k up..."
I pivot on my heel before he can finish the sentence and stalk out to the living area.
"Julianne!" Nate"s voice is panicked as he follows me but I ignore him. I hear Audrey"s heels click on the hardwood as she follows after Nate.
I walk into the kitchen and open the fridge. Chocolate cheesecake and lobster are staring back at me along with my favorite champagne. I turn around and take in the room, the flowers, the fire, and I look into Nate"s gray eyes for a long minute.
Audrey is fuming, shooting daggers at me, then gazing longingly at Nate, and I almost feel sorry for her.
"I understand." I tell her calmly. "I understand how easy he is to love, Audrey."
Nate swears under his breath and pushes a hand through his hair. Audrey"s lip quivers.
"But none of this," I wave my hand at the room, "is for you. He isn"t yours. I suggest you take whatever he offered you and run with it, because it"s all you"re going to get."
Her eyes narrow and she smiles slyly. "He just offered me his c.o.c.k, like always."
"What the f.u.c.k, Audrey!"
I walk casually over to her and look her straight in the eye. "If you ever touch him again, I"ll rip your tongue out of your pretty little head."
Audrey looks over at Nate. "This is who you want?"
"With every breath I take. Get the f.u.c.k out of our home, Audrey."
The breath leaves me as I stare at him. Our home? He stares back at me, his jaw clenched, his gray eyes burning with need and love.
Audrey looks at us both and sneers at me. "At least I got you fired."
"Get the f.u.c.k out, Audrey!" Nate yells and she jumps. She s.n.a.t.c.hes up her purse and jacket and stomps moodily to the door, slamming it behind her.
I can"t move. I just feast on him with my eyes. He"s in his jeans and black t-shirt, showing off his beautiful tattoo. His hair is loose. His hands are in fists at his side and every muscle in his gorgeous body is tight.
"Are you really here?" he whispers.
"I"m here," I whisper back.
"Why?"
Why?
I walk toward him and suddenly feel calm. This is where I"m supposed to be. But he still has some explaining to do.
"Because I"m done running."
"Jules, what happened on Monday..."
"We"ll get to that. I have a question first." His eyes narrow on mine.
"What is it?"
"Can I have my necklace back, please?"
Nate"s whole body sags as he sighs and closes his eyes in relief. He reaches in his pocket and pulls out the necklace. "I"ve been carrying it around for four days."
He holds it out to me, but I shake my head and turn around. "Will you please fasten it?"
I pull my hair out of his way and he fastens the lovely silver heart pendant around my neck, but doesn"t touch me.
Not yet.
And that"s okay because once he starts I"m not going to let him stop and I need to hear what the f.u.c.k happened on Monday.
"Let"s sit." He leads me to the sofa and we sit. I kick off my shoes and pull my legs up under me and turn to face him. He brings one leg up on the cushion and faces me too. We sit like this for a minute, just looking at each other, until I feel tears pool in my eyes.
"Don"t cry," he whispers. "I can"t stand it when you cry."
I shake my head and look down at my hands, then take a deep breath and look back up at him, the tears under control.
"I"m listening."
"Where did you go?" he asks, his voice low and eyes fierce.
"I was at Will"s."
"Are you okay?" he asks.
"I"m getting there," I respond.
"You"re done running, Julianne." He clenches his eyes shut for a moment and then looks at me again, his eyes sad and filled with longing. "I can"t take it when you run away from me."
"Nate, Monday was..."
"I know exactly what Monday was, and you would too if you"d have listened to me."
"It hurt," I whisper. "I needed you more Monday afternoon than I"ve ever needed anyone, and you weren"t there for me. You didn"t fight with me, for us. It made me feel insignificant and like everything we had was nothing."