With Or Without Him

Chapter 18

"I"d be delighted to cook for you. I"m sure Alcide will be perfectly fine without my attention for a few moments. One small dog can"t possibly make much mess, particularly if I keep the flour and eggs out of reach."

Tyler winced. "I only want a sandwich."

"Which I"m only too pleased to-"

"Wilson," Haris snapped, "let him make himself a sandwich."

Haris left the kitchen and Tyler"s shoulders slumped. Not quite out of his black mood then.



"Bread in the box, b.u.t.ter in the dish, cheese and ham in the fridge, or there"s Marmite and jam in the cupboard," Wilson said.

"Thank you."

Tyler gathered everything together and smiled at Wilson hand feeding the dog tiny sc.r.a.ps of beef.

"Shall I make a sandwich for Haris?" Tyler asked.

Wilson opened his mouth and Tyler just knew "no" was going to come out, but Wilson said, "Yes. That would be kind."

"Does he like Marmite?"

"A faint smear."

"What about you? Would you like a sandwich too?"

"No, but thank you for asking."

Tyler sawed awkwardly at the loaf. He only ever bought sliced bread.

"So..." he mumbled. "Am I one of many strays?"

"I"ve no idea what you mean, sir."

"Cut out the sir. I know you don"t like me."

Wilson sat at the table with the dog in his arms. "I apologize if I"ve given that impression. I don"t know you. I"m not able to judge. Yet. But no, you"re not one of many. No one on two legs has ever been invited to stay here before, and of course you are no bother, the extra bedroom and bathroom to clean should take me no time at all, provided my back doesn"t seize up. And whatever makes my employer happy makes me happy. Mostly."

Tyler let out a heavy sigh. "Except he"s not happy."

"You"ve disturbed the equilibrium, and sometimes that can be a good thing. He"s..."

"What?"

"He"s a good man. A word of warning, if I may be so bold. If you hurt him, I"ll hurt you."

Tyler almost dropped the jar of Marmite. For a moment, Wilson had looked and sounded an entirely different guy. On the point of saying what if Haris hurt him, Tyler pressed his lips together. He tidied up before he left the kitchen and carried two plates of sandwiches to the study where Haris worked on a laptop.

"I made you a sandwich too." Tyler put it on the desk.

Haris ignored it and him. Tyler slumped in a chair and rested the plate on his lap. One mouthful and he realized he"d cut the bread too thick.

"Take little bites or you might choke," he said.

Haris looked up from the laptop to the plate and rolled his eyes. Tyler glanced around the room. Books, books and more books. Oh and a photograph in a silver frame. He pushed himself up and walked over to it. Three boys and their parents. "Is that-?"

Haris reached round, s.n.a.t.c.hed the picture, put it face down on his desk and carried on working.

Tyler knew it was up to him to put this right. He had a feeling the guy could win medals for sulking.

"I haven"t and won"t break the terms of our arrangement," Tyler said. "I don"t know how many times I have to tell you that you can trust me. But you have to let me breathe. You can"t chain me to you."

"You walked out in the middle of the f.u.c.king night without a word. I was worried," Haris muttered through gritted teeth.

"I"m sorry." Tyler picked up the sandwich and then put it down again. "A friend needed help. That"s all it was. He"d been..."

Haris looked across at him. "What?"

"Raped."

Haris"s eyes widened in shock.

"And no, he hasn"t told the police. He won"t. He knows what will happen if he does; the humiliation, the raking up of all his s.e.xual history, and the rapist would likely still get away with it."

"Is he...okay?"

"A little knocked around but yeah, he"ll live. He"s learned a lesson the hard way."

Haris opened his mouth and Tyler spoke quickly before he could ask for more details. "I"ve a gig on Tuesday night. You can come if you like."

There was a long pause before Haris answered. "What time?"

"We"re on at nine. We usually rehea.r.s.e in college after lectures and go straight to the venue. The Room on Borough High Street."

Haris smiled. "I"d love to come. Thank you. I have to attend a charity dinner this evening. Want to give your new tux an outing?"

Tyler breathed a mental sigh of relief. "Sure. You"re going to have to teach me how to tie a bow tie."

Haris pushed to his feet. "I"ll show you now."

"I don"t want to disturb you."

"I want to be disturbed."

"So we"re friends again?" Tyler asked.

Haris nodded.

Haris hated to be this needy but felt powerless to resist Tyler. Before they"d even reached the bedroom, he had the guy half-undressed. Tyler tripped on his pants and stumbled into the dark room, laughing. Haris switched on the light and yanked off his own clothes before Tyler had untangled himself from the rest of his. But when he reached to pull Tyler down on the bed, he twisted round and Haris was the one who landed on his back.

"Let me be in charge?" Tyler asked.

Haris nodded.

"Scoot down so your b.u.t.t"s at the bottom of the bed and bend your knees so your feet are on the bed too."

l.u.s.t raged through him, every brush against his skin by any part of Tyler sent shivers of antic.i.p.ation rippling through his body like rivers of fire. He positioned himself as Tyler had requested and leaned up on his elbows to watch the guy stroke his own c.o.c.k and play with his b.a.l.l.s.

Haris"s mouth watered. "Need help with that?"

"Nope. I want you to come first."

That sounded good to him. Haris allowed his head to drop to the bed and his eyes fluttered shut. His c.o.c.k ached, his swollen nuts were drawn up tight and he needed Tyler"s inventive mouth on him right now. He sucked in a breath at the blast of warm air hitting his b.a.l.l.s. The sensation made his nerve endings riot and goose b.u.mps skittered over his skin. He held his breath as Tyler slowly licked up the seam of his s.c.r.o.t.u.m, continued to the tip of his c.o.c.k and circled the head. As the wet tongue dipped into his slit, Haris released a long, loud groan.

"You taste better than Marmite," Tyler whispered. "And I really like Marmite."

Haris laughed and then shivered as Tyler"s hair brushed his thighs. He used his tongue to separate his b.a.l.l.s, pressing down hard between, and Haris clutched the bed cover in his fists. "Oh f.u.c.k, f.u.c.k."

"You like that?" Tyler whispered. "Or do you want me to stop?"

"I thought...you...were the one in charge." He gasped as Tyler sucked hard at the root of his c.o.c.k at the point where it joined his body. "Shhhiiit," he mumbled.

"Don"t come until I tell you," Tyler said.

A gurgle of laughter slipped from his mouth. "That"s not going to work. My c.o.c.k has a mind of its own."

Tyler laved his b.a.l.l.s, his c.o.c.k, the creases of his thighs. He kissed, lapped and sucked him to the edge of nirvana. He teased him to the very brink of detonation and then clamped his hand down tight at the base of his c.o.c.k and pressed the heel of his palm on his b.a.l.l.s and stopped the o.r.g.a.s.m in its tracks. Haris shook with the need to come, antic.i.p.ation stealing the air from his lungs. Tyler"s mouth latched onto the stretch of skin between his b.a.l.l.s and his a.n.u.s, and sucked with the perfect pressure to make his head swim.

"That...ahh G.o.d...f.u.c.k." Haris lost the ability to speak as Tyler brought his other hand into play, forming two tight rings around his c.o.c.k using his thumbs and index fingers. He started slow, sliding the rings in opposite directions, squeezing down to the base and up to the crest at the same time. The need to come roared back like a tornado, the sensation toe curling, the friction delicious and as Tyler"s hands moved faster, with a flood of pre-come acting as lubricant, Haris raced toward completion.

Only for the guy to bring him down again. The ache in his gut deepened.

"Oh you beautiful f.u.c.king b.a.s.t.a.r.d," he grunted.

"I think you mean highly skilled pleasure bringer."

Haris snorted but the sound was choked off as Tyler pressed the tip of his tongue against his a.n.u.s. The hands slowed on his c.o.c.k as Tyler rimmed him, fluttering his tongue around the tight ring of muscles, teasing, pressing, tormenting until Haris"s breath came out in stuttering bursts. He couldn"t help rocking his hips, trying to get more of Tyler"s hot tongue. Nothing else mattered but that.

"Oh b...f...sh...," he muttered. I"m losing my mind.

Tyler licked and pushed until his tongue breached the barrier and then Haris could barely inhale.

"That"s...oh f.u.c.k."

He slid into a fugue-like state in which he was ultra-aware of the feel of Tyler"s silky hair against his inner thighs, the rub of his nose against his skin, the rasp of his cheeks, the wet warmth of his tongue reaming his a.s.s, and the firm touch of expert hands on his c.o.c.k and b.a.l.l.s. He wanted the sensation to go on forever, but the deep ache in his gut told him he couldn"t last much longer.

"Not yet," Tyler muttered into his b.u.t.t.

"I...can"t."

"Yeah you can. Think of something boring."

He tried and failed. A sharp pain sprang up at the base of his skull, an army of ants stampeded down his spine and his body spasmed. Tyler pressed on the triangle of skin behind his b.a.l.l.s and the already intense o.r.g.a.s.m hit him harder. Every part of him became caught up in the sensation, not just his c.o.c.k and his exploding b.a.l.l.s. His back arched off the bed, his lungs locked and his heart faltered. Long, thick ropes of come spurted up his chest, and a drop hit his lips. For f.u.c.k"s sake. When does that ever happen outside p.o.r.n movies? For a long, delirious moment he hung frozen in ecstasy before he fell back to the bed, making sounds that sounded suspiciously like childish sobs.

Tyler soothed him down with licks and soft caresses.

"f.u.c.king h.e.l.l," Haris blurted. "Unbelievable." Where did you learn to do that? Even as the thought surged into his mind, he pushed it aside. Whatever Tyler had done in the past didn"t matter. He was his now. For four months anyway.

His heart rate slowed, his breathing eased and the world came back into focus. He leaned up to look down at Tyler"s smug grin, and he smiled.

"Hold that thought," Tyler said. "You"re very messy. I have some cleaning to do."

Supporting himself on all fours over Haris"s body, Tyler licked his way up his chest, lapping at the come until he reached his chin.

"Your f.u.c.king chin? How did you manage that? Think we should have a contest to see who can shoot the farthest?" Tyler asked.

"No because we"re not teenagers and you can practically bend yourself in half. I don"t enter contests I can"t win."

"That"s not very sporting."

"I"m a control freak. I can"t help it."

Tyler lowered his head and sucked on Haris"s lower lip, using the tip of his tongue to caress the point just below it. Haris groaned, wrapped his arms around him and pulled him down to lie on him.

"How come you"re so good at this?" Haris spoke without thinking. "You know every way to drive me wild."

When Tyler tensed he regretted the question.

"Guess I"m naturally gifted." Tyler paused. "Or a s.e.x maniac. Or both, I suppose."

Haris laughed.

"Talking of s.e.x..." Tyler moved off him. "My turn. Roll over."

"Let me switch off the light."

"No." Tyler snagged his arm as he started to get off the bed. "Leave it on."

A bubble of unease grew in his gut. Haris hesitated.

"I"m in charge. We agreed."

"I...I don"t-"

Tyler pinned him with his gaze. "I know you don"t, but the scars aren"t going away. I don"t know how long you"ve lived with them, but I don"t see them when I look at you. I won"t see them when we"re f.u.c.king."

How could he not? But he wanted to feel the length of Tyler pressed on his back. No one had f.u.c.ked him like that. Ever. He rolled over and closed his eyes. He might be telling himself to relax, but his heart hammered and his fingers curled into fists. If Tyler touched his scars, he"d flip but instead the guy licked his ankle, and when he sucked at the patch of skin there, below the bone, Haris just about flew.

Under a flurry of kisses, caresses and licks up his calves and then his thighs, gradually the tension seeped from his body. Tyler was slow and patient, ma.s.saging the anxiety out of him, getting him ready with his fingers. By the time the guy had slid on a condom, lubed up and pressed himself into him, nothing had ever felt more right. He stopped thinking about his back, stopped thinking period and just enjoyed the weight, the pressure, the heat of Tyler"s body on his, in his, the sounds the guy made as he rocked into him and the sensation of Tyler"s c.o.c.k buried inside his body.

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