With Or Without Him

Chapter 22

Tyler snapped back to the reality of a lecture already started and a professor who disliked him staring at him intently. Please don"t ask me a question. Tyler tried to look attentive and interested and breathed a sigh of relief when the professor switched his attention to someone else.

He didn"t get a moment to contact Haris until lunchtime. He texted Can U talk? Within a minute, his phone rang.

"Hi. What"s up?" Even the sound of Haris"s voice made Tyler"s toes curl.

"Remember that man from Spot magazine who gave me his card?"

"Yep."



"He"s definitely coming to the gig tomorrow night."

"That"s fantastic. I suppose that means you don"t want me to do my Jingle Bells solo."

Tyler laughed. "No."

"I"m brokenhearted."

"I"ll mend it later."

He could almost hear Haris swallowing.

"Thing is, I"m going to be late back tonight. We need an extra rehearsal. I"ve booked a room at college and we"ll get pizzas so don"t expect me back until much before midnight."

He swallowed at the lie but he didn"t want to tell Haris he was going to see Jeremy. Oh s.h.i.t, I have to. "The reason I"ll be that late is I need to go and check on Jeremy. He"s a bit freaked out."

"Right. Would you like Wilson to drive you?"

Haris didn"t sound p.i.s.sed off but Tyler thought he was.

"No thanks. I don"t want to keep him hanging around."

"Then get a cab. I put the money in your account today."

"Oh. Okay, thanks. See you later. Warm my side of the bed."

He held his breath and heard Haris chuckle before the call cut off.

The rehearsal went okay, though they were all trying too hard, including him. Tyler figured that by tomorrow, they"d have calmed down enough to play like they usually did. He locked up his guitar with Newt"s drums, confirmed someone had booked the van to use the next day and then made his way to Cutty Sark Station.

It felt strange going back to his flat. The place already didn"t feel like his anymore. But if he wanted to continue living with Haris and not feel swamped with guilt or worried someone would tell Haris first, he needed to explain everything. He didn"t look forward to the conversation, knowing he might be back in his old place sooner than he"d planned.

As he stepped off the train and headed for the stairs to the surface, something p.r.i.c.kled between his shoulder blades and he looked back. He caught the gaze of a middle-aged guy in dark gray coat, carrying a briefcase. Tyler had seen him waiting on the platform at Greenwich.

He didn"t think any more of it until he spotted him taking the same route after he"d exited the station. Coincidence? Once Tyler turned the next corner, he ran and darted into a doorway. He gave the guy long enough to walk past and when he didn"t, Tyler rolled his eyes at his stupidity, checked both ways down an empty street and carried on walking. He took out his phone and texted. Couple of minutes away. Put kettle on.

Jeremy texted back, Brg ice cream.

d.a.m.n. Tyler swiveled around to go back to the store he"d just pa.s.sed and...saw the man in the coat again. What the f.u.c.k? He hurried into the shop, his heart pounding, and grabbed a tub of ice cream at random. He knew the man who was serving. It was one of Tyler"s regular places to shop.

"Hi, Sanjit." Tyler put the exact money on the counter.

"Ice cream? In this weather?"

"Hey, you"re supposed to be encouraging customers."

"Like to buy a bottle of whiskey instead?"

Tyler laughed. "No. Do me a favor? Let me out the back way? I think there"s some w.a.n.ker following me."

Sanjit narrowed his eyes. "No problem, bro. What"s the guy look like?"

"Middle-aged. Gray coat. Shorter than me."

Sanjit nodded. He opened the door behind the counter and shouted, "Friend coming through."

"Thanks." Tyler picked up the ice cream and hurried past the curious eyes of Sanjit"s father to the store"s rear entrance.

There was no one around as he walked down the street to his flat, and he"d just about convinced himself his imagination had been running wild when a dark-haired guy stepped out of the doorway he"d been heading for. Tyler hesitated and then tightened his grip on the bag holding the ice cream. It was frozen enough to inflict damage.

"Tyler," Jeremy called and Tyler exhaled.

Jeremy flung his arms around him.

"What have you done to your hair?" Tyler wriggled free.

"Dyed it. I wanted to see if you"d recognize me."

Tyler pushed him back toward the door. "Let"s get off the street."

Once they were inside his flat and the door was locked, he went over to the window and looked through a crack in the curtains. He caught the flare of a lighter in a black car parked across the road, but there was no sign of the guy in the gray coat.

"What is it?" Jeremy"s voice cracked.

c.r.a.p. Now he"d freaked out Jeremy. "There"s a nosey woman lives across the road. I like to stick my tongue out at her." He put the ice cream on the counter.

Jeremy sighed. He took two spoons out of a kitchen drawer and offered one to Tyler who shook his head.

"Are you sure it was Gerald watching this place?" Tyler asked.

"Pretty sure."

"G.o.d, you look different with dark hair." Although he still looked battered.

Jeremy ran his fingers through it. "I asked the girl upstairs to get the dye for me. I figured..."

Tyler could guess what he figured. "I think you ought to tell Prescott what Gerald did."

Jeremy slumped on the bed, hugging the ice cream. "He"ll say it"s my own fault."

Tyler sat beside him. "If you tell him you can"t go to the parties anymore because of Gerald, I think he"ll get the message."

"But if Prescott drops Gerald, what"s going to stop Gerald coming after me?"

Which worked the conversation right to where Tyler wanted it. "You need to go away from here and forget you ever met Prescott. Isn"t there someone you could stay with in another town?"

"You want me out?" If Jeremy"s shoulders slumped any lower, he"d have no neck.

"You can stay here as long as you want. I just don"t think you ought to be anywhere near Prescott or Gerald. If Gerald has been watching you, you ought to go somewhere he can"t find you. He"s a sick enough f.u.c.k that he probably thought you enjoyed him being rough."

Jeremy shuddered. "I don"t think so. I told him to stop." He scooped up a huge spoonful of ice cream and shoved it in his mouth.

"Yeah, but Gerald doesn"t listen. He"s always asking me to go some place with him and I won"t. While Prescott is around, I don"t think he"d dare go too far but you"ve seen what he"s like. He just waited and pounced. I don"t like the idea of you being here on your own."

That brought a smile to Jeremy"s lips. "That"s easily solved."

"No, it isn"t. I can"t stay here with you. Haris wouldn"t understand."

"Haris." Jeremy sighed. "So it"s serious between you two?"

"Yeah." Sort of.

"Oh."

Christ. Was that what this had been about? Had Jeremy lied about Gerald just to get him to come? But then he looked at Jeremy"s face and saw fear in his eyes and remembered Gerald"s reaction at the museum.

"Go home," Tyler whispered.

"They don"t want me. No one wants me. Only f.u.c.king Gerald."

"You"re not cut out for this."

Jeremy shrugged.

Tyler stood up. "I have to go. I"ve done as much as I can to help you. I know you need the money. I understand because I feel the same way, but I"m not sure what we did was worth what comes with it."

"Oh f.u.c.k off. It"s okay for you. A boyfriend who buys you clothes and shoes from Harrods? What would you want with me?"

Tyler shuffled his feet. "I like you, otherwise I"d be telling you to f.u.c.k off. But I can"t be responsible for you. You have to take care of yourself. Keep the door locked." He walked out.

He was about to exit onto the street when he thought again. Maybe going over the wall was a better choice. If Gerald was hanging about on the road, Tyler didn"t want to b.u.mp into him and if he saw the other guy, he"d officially freak out.

Five minutes later, Tyler sprinted toward the Tube station, officially freaked out. The guy in the gray coat was definitely following him. No more wondering. No more thought of coincidence. Tyler vaulted down the steps, barely letting his feet connect with them and ran onto the platform just as the doors were closing. The train was going the wrong way but he didn"t care. He flung himself on board, pressed his face to the window and watched as the man hurried onto the platform. Tyler turned away and dropped onto a seat. What the h.e.l.l is going on?

By the time he"d changed trains several times and reached Holland Park, he"d gone through every reason he could think of for someone to follow him and still not made sense of it. Prescott? Gerald? Maybe neither.

When he let himself into the house, he saw a light coming from Haris"s study. He knocked on the door and poked his head around.

"I need-"

"What?" Haris snapped.

Tyler let the words "a hug" die in his throat. "Thought you"d be warming the bed."

"I"m busy."

"I need to talk to you."

That got him to look up, but the expression on his face made Tyler feel like his heart had been put in a vise.

"I"m busy."

Haris looked down again. Tyler backed away and closed the door quietly. He had no idea what he"d done now, but he was tired of always being in the wrong, always being the one who tried to put things right. He needed someone he could rely on, not a man who blew hot and cold on a whim. Then he remembered what he"d just said to Jeremy. That he had to take care of himself. What was the point telling Haris about Prescott"s parties? The outcome was inevitable. He might as well pack.

Except he had nowhere to go and some stupid, pathetic part of him still wanted Haris.

Haris stared at the closed door and then reached into his drawer and took out his mobile.

"He"s just got back. Start again and tell me exactly how you came to lose him."

Stan was apologetic, clearly professionally offended that Tyler had managed to not only spot he had a tail but give him the slip.

"I need more than one person watching him," Stan said.

"No, don"t bother. I"ve heard and seen enough. Send me your bill."

Haris"s fingers shook as he switched off the phone. Tyler had lied to him. He"d told him he was going to see Jeremy and he hadn"t. He"d met some dark-haired guy. Stan had taken a picture of them in each other"s arms before the pair had gone into Tyler"s flat, and sent it to Haris"s phone. The pain of Tyler"s betrayal made his heart hurt.

Tomorrow he"d tell him to leave.

As he walked up the stairs, the creak of a headboard froze him in his tracks. The door opposite his room was part open. Haris heard the noise again, this time accompanied by a low moan of pleasure and his c.o.c.k stirred. He told his feet to keep moving toward his room but his d.i.c.k overruled his brain. The rhythmic creaking of the headboard ratcheted up his desire and Haris had to clamp his lips together to stop a moan of his own escaping.

He stepped silently to the door and leaned against the wall. He had an almost perfect view in the lamplight of a naked Tyler, lying on his back, his hands wrapped around his c.o.c.k. His eyes were closed, dark lashes brushed his cheeks, his mouth open as he panted. Haris watched mesmerized as Tyler worked his shaft with two hands and every time the rounded head of his d.i.c.k was exposed, Haris gulped.

His own d.i.c.k pushed insistently at his zipper, and he fumbled to free it, every sound he made seeming overloud. But Tyler was wrapped fast in his own need, his slight groans and cries building in intensity as he began to buck his hips. Haris wrapped his fingers around his d.i.c.k and squeezed hard. He almost wanted to hurt himself to drag his brain into gear and step away.

Only nothing could make him step away.

When Tyler took one hand from his c.o.c.k, brought it to his mouth and sucked his fingers, Haris bit his lip. Tyler looked so s.e.xy, so perfect, so...f.u.c.king treacherous b.a.s.t.a.r.d f.u.c.king hurtful lying cheating stupid... Haris tasted blood. The guy"s hand dropped from his mouth to his nipple and twisted it hard in his fingers. When Tyler sucked in a breath, Haris did too. You like that? Did you like that when I did it? What didn"t I do right? Why didn"t you want me enough?

Tyler spread his legs, dug his heels into the bed and began to thrust his hips up as he dragged his fist down. Haris found himself matching Tyler"s speed, his hand dragging up and down his erection at the same pace, imagining he held both their d.i.c.ks. Tyler"s body gleamed with perspiration and he longed to lick every inch of his skin. He longed to sink his c.o.c.k into Tyler"s a.s.s and f.u.c.k him and f.u.c.k him and f.u.c.k him.

He longed for him and it was over.

Pre-come leaked from their c.o.c.ks, wetting their hands. They were doing this together and they"d never been further apart. As his shaft slid more rapidly in his grip, Haris"s b.a.l.l.s tensed and drew up tight to his body. Tyler came with a loud moan, come spewing over his chest in long silky lines. Haris sank his teeth into his cheeks as o.r.g.a.s.m grabbed him in its jaws. The ache in the back of his head intensified and fire shot down his spine to ignite his b.a.l.l.s. He wrapped his hand around the tip of his c.o.c.k and spurted into his palm.

The moment he could walk, he slid across the hall into his room and closed the door.

Tyler sighed heavily. So that hadn"t worked. He"d hoped Haris would join him. The guy knew it wasn"t his room so he had to have realized he was doing it on purpose. He rolled out of bed and padded upstairs. It had been a last ditch attempt, though he wondered why he"d bothered. Haris didn"t want him anymore. Simple as that.

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