"Of course. Only the best for a Worth," he said dryly as a hotel porter opened the door for her.
She climbed out of the car as best she could what with the baby in her arms.
Two hotel employees rushed toward the car after her exit, gathering her meager belongings. Alex exited the cab and rounded the car so he could stand beside her. "I called while you were getting your things. They"ll deliver your belongings to the suite so you don"t have to worry about it."
"I need the diaper bag." She ran after the porter who had it slung over his arm, jostling a now crying Charlotte in her arms. She finally caught up with the man and tugged on his arm. "Sir, could I please have the bag?"
"But of course, miss." He handed it to her without question, his eyes wide as he looked from her to Alex who somehow magically appeared at her side. Again.
"My apologies, Mister Worth."
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"No need. It was an honest mistake." He nodded at the porter who then turned on his heel and scurried away.
"You intimidate people just by looking at them." She was in awe of his quiet power yet it also disgusted her. It made her feel like every other poor little regular minion, enraptured with the presence he so effortlessly yielded.
"Are you trying to find fault with everything I do?" He hurried to keep up with her as she strode into the hotel lobby.
"Yes." She glanced about, looking for the elevators. She needed to get Charlotte to a room and quick so she could feed her. Her cries were growing louder, drawing the attention of the guests milling about the lobby. "What floor are you staying on?"
"The penthouse."
"Of course," she muttered and shook her head. "Is there a separate elevator or do you use the same one as the common people do?"
"No special elevator." He paused, looked ready to say something else but she wouldn"t give him the chance. "Tessa, wait." She"d already taken off toward the elevators, hating how everyone looked at her with thinly veiled disgust. Had none of them ever seen a fussy baby before?
Were none of them parents? They looked at her and Charlotte like they were alien creatures who had just landed in their midst.
Alex kept calling her name but she ignored him. Didn"t slow her pace until she finally got to the elevators where she waited amongst a group of elegantly dressed couples. They all appeared ready to attend a party, the women gorgeous and dripping in jewels and the men in black tie.
"Alexander Worth, is that you?" one of the women screeched as he approached.
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Tessa kept her head bent, trying her best to calm Charlotte. The woman draped herself over Alex who looked very uncomfortable as he tried to escape her grip. She didn"t feel sorry for him. No, more like she wanted to kick him in the shins and run for cover.
Why did he have to know everyone? And why was she always left feeling like an awkward little fool? He probably didn"t want any of these people to see her standing next to him clutching a baby. They would talk, gossip would spread around London and soon the rumors would fly all over the world.
Turning, she kept her back to them and her ears wide open.
There was much idle chitchat amongst the group and Alex as they waited for the elevator. Luckily, Charlotte had quieted down. Alex never once acknowledged them, let alone mentioned them. She couldn"t blame him but there was that teeny trickle of shame coursing through her. That perhaps he was embarra.s.sed to have them discovered. Unmarried, young and clearly unsophisticated, his former employee who once worked directly under him and she was the mother of his first child?
It was all so-sordid.
A ding sounded and the elevator doors slid open, a gob of people spilling out before they all walked in. Tessa hurried in first and stood at the back of the car, Alex closer to the front. The car quickly emptied, the group who knew Alex getting off on the third floor where the banquet rooms were. One by one, the people stepped off until finally, they were the only two in the elevator.
Well, three, counting Charlotte.
"You didn"t want to be seen with me," he said the moment the last person stepped off and the doors shut.
"I thought you didn"t want to be seen with me. We"re your dirty little secret, after all."
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"I don"t think that..."
"Give me a break. How would you explain us to your friends, hmm? "Oh, let me introduce you to Tessa. She recently gave birth to my daughter who I only just learned exists. You see, Tessa used to be my a.s.sistant and we had a torrid little affair until I fired her for betraying me." Does that sound about right to you, Alex?" She glared at him.
"Everything is so black and white for you, isn"t it?" She couldn"t believe he had the nerve to say that. "You"re the king of black and white. There are no shades of gray when it comes to the way you conduct your life. It"s either one thing or another. This side or that side. Talk to your brothers, talk to your business a.s.sociates and the board members. They"ll all agree with me."
His skin turned pale. He looked shaken, and she couldn"t help the surge of satisfaction that pulsed through her. He deserved to hear the truth.
The elevator stopped with a soft ding and he turned toward the wall, pushing his keycard into the slot so the doors magically slid open. He stood back, allowing her to go first and she did so, tucking Charlotte close, wishing like crazy he would acknowledge her.
"What if I told you I was trying to change my ways?" His velvety soft words curled around her, and she slowly turned around. He stood in front of the now closed elevator doors, his entire body tense. They were in a tiny entry, the door to the suite shut. The s.p.a.ce felt very tight, especially with Alex"s overwhelming presence taking over.
"I would say I have a hard time believing that." He took a step toward her. "What do I have to do to prove myself? To earn your forgiveness? To regain your trust?"
200.
She blinked. Charlotte"s hunger forgotten, her shoulders sagged at his overwhelming words.
Did he mean it? Could he mean it? Did he really want to change?
"I know something you could do," she finally said.
Alex hadn"t moved from where he stood. "What?"
"You could start by acknowledging your daughter." Fear coursed through Alex at Tessa"s suggestion. He...couldn"t do that.
Babies made him uncomfortable. He"d never been around them much. h.e.l.l, he didn"t think he"d ever held one. Where would he have had the opportunity?
"She"s yours, Alex. There"s no mistaking it." She sounded so sad, looked so lost. And he felt like an utter a.s.s for doing this to her. "She looks so much like you."
"Why did you keep her from me?" He sounded raw, felt raw.
"You made it very clear that you never wanted to see me again." He had. He knew he had, and he"d mentally kicked himself for it every day since that night he sent her away.
"Hold your daughter, Alex," she said when he didn"t say anything. "I want you to hold Charlotte."
Slowly he approached Tessa. The diaper bag hung off her arm, swinging from the crook of her elbow. She held the baby close, her little face nuzzled against Tessa"s neck. Tessa"s familiar scent filled his senses, mixed with a sweeter, purer smell.
His baby. His child"s scent. Breathing deep, he held it, let it absorb through his skin, flow through his blood.
Tentatively he rested his hand on the baby"s back. She was warm, so warm and the little sleeper she wore was soft. She shifted beneath his palm, offered a 201.
little hiccup and her head jerked against Tessa"s body. He dropped his hand, shocked by the movement.
"Look at her." Tessa turned the baby in her arms and offered Charlotte to him, belly up, legs kicking straight out. Her eyes...were just like his. Same color and shape. The dark hair was negligible, could come from either of them and her lips were full and sweet, just like her mother"s.
An ache formed in his chest and he couldn"t breathe. Not while staring at the face of the child he and Tessa created. She was beautiful and so small. Innocent and lovely and s.c.r.e.w.i.n.g up her face, ready to bawl her little eyes out.
"Oh." Tessa pulled the baby close to her. "She"s hungry. I need to feed her." Alex went for the diaper bag still swinging from her arm. He was so rude.
He hadn"t even taken it for her. "Is there a bottle inside the bag?"
"I, um, breastfeed her." Her cheeks were pink, and she let him take the bag.
Pausing, still holding the bag"s strap in his hand, he didn"t know quite what to say. "That"s a-good thing right?"
"The very best thing." She nodded.
A knock sounded on the door. "Your bags," he murmured, turning toward the door. Glad to be away from her and the baby for at least a few seconds.
He needed to collect his thoughts, set his head on straight. It was all too much for him to take in. He wondered if he was somehow in a state of shock.
The bellboy brought Tessa"s simple black overnight bag in and Alex tipped him generously, not even paying attention to how much he gave him. The boy"s eyes went wide and he nodded enthusiastically, offering a loud, "Have a most pleasant evening, sir," before he hustled out of the suite.
Alex took the bag and set it in the bedroom he wasn"t using. He"d stayed at Claridge"s only because Hunter always did in the past and they were more than 202 accommodating, the rooms comfortable. He certainly hadn"t wanted to stay at the hotel where he"d last been with Tessa.
Too many memories.
And now they made more memories here. Even crazier ones. Touching his daughter for the first time had been-magical. It had only been for a few minutes but having his hand on her had sent a jolt through him unlike anything he"d ever experienced before.
Charlotte was his child. Made from his flesh and blood, conceived...
He frowned. When had she been conceived anyway?
With determined steps he headed back to the living area, wanting to ask Tessa if she knew when it had actually happened. He"d tried to be careful, had used a condom every single time they"d been together or so he thought...
Alex stopped short at the vision before him. Tessa sat in a large overstuffed chair, her cardigan gone, the sh.e.l.l she wore lifted up, their child at her full breast.
Charlotte squirmed her dark head, falling off her mother"s nipple and Tessa reached for her, circling the baby"s lips with the tip of her index finger before she reattached Charlotte onto her nipple.
"There, there," she murmured, stroking the baby"s back as she stared down at her.
His skin tightened. She"d changed so much. Her body was fuller, definitely her b.r.e.a.s.t.s were and her nipple-what he saw of it-was larger, a darker shade of rose. She looked so content, a natural at the nurturing role and he"d never seen a more beautiful thing as his child nursing from her mother.
Pride and some other foreign emotion squeezed his chest tight. He tried to inhale but it was tough. He could hardly catch his breath. Felt like it had been stolen right out of his lungs.
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As if she could sense him standing there watching her, she glanced up, her dark brown eyes meeting his. Her cheeks flushed, she moistened her lips with the tip of her tongue. l.u.s.t spiraled through him, straight to his groin and his c.o.c.k twitched in recognition. He hadn"t felt this strongly about any woman.
Ever.
Despite the betrayal between them, the secrets and the lies, he had to make it right. He had to make Tessa his.
Forever.
204.
Chapter Eighteen.
He"d ordered room service. It was far too late to dine out for all the best restaurants would be full on a Sat.u.r.day evening. Besides, the baby was sleeping peacefully in the ba.s.sinet he"d had brought up earlier.
Tessa was in the shower, avoiding the inevitable. He let her go after she begged off a serious conversation. Said she needed to relax and wanted to feel refreshed before they embarked on this next step.
Not that he could blame her.
Alex went into Tessa"s room and stood over the ba.s.sinet, studying the sleeping bundle within. She wore a pale green sleeper sprigged with little white daisies, her fist close to her mouth, cheeks plump and pink. The hair on the back of her head stood straight up and he smiled, reaching out to brush his fingers down the length of her bent legs.
Charlotte stirred and he yanked his hand back, not wanting to disturb her.
He didn"t have a clue what he was supposed to do if she started to cry. He hadn"t even held her yet.
If he was a complete a.s.s, this was the perfect opportunity for him to s.n.a.t.c.h the baby and leave. She"d almost deserve it, if he let himself get angry enough.
He could see her side of everything though. How scared she must"ve been, pregnant in a foreign city, a foreign country. Thank G.o.d she"d had her sister with her. He"d have to thank the hostile Gina tomorrow. If she"d let him.
Tessa accused him of only seeing things black or white. She hadn"t been with him in a year, had no idea the changes he"d gone through. The old Alex would"ve tossed her explanations aside and demanded she hand the baby over.
No pleading, no begging allowed. He would"ve taken Charlotte, hopped on the Worth jet and headed straight back to New York. Never allowing Tessa to see the baby again.
But he wanted Tessa. So badly it hurt to look at her, to want her. Now that there was a child in the mix, he could never let her go. Not again, not ever.
She emerged from the steamy bathroom fifteen minutes later, stopping short when she found him standing next to the ba.s.sinet, still watching his sleeping daughter. Her hair was wet, hanging past her shoulders, a towel still in her hand and she wore a thick, pale cream robe provided by the hotel.
She was gorgeous.
"What are you doing in here?" she asked warily.
"Looking at Charlotte." He tore his gaze from his daughter though it was proving more and more difficult each time. "I ordered room service."
"Thank you, but I"m not really hungry." She toweled off the ends of her hair, such a mundane, everyday activity but he couldn"t take his eyes off of her. Her feet were bare, her calves sleek and he wondered if she was naked beneath the robe.
He wished he had the right, the privilege to find out.
"You should eat, Tessa. You need to keep up your strength. For the baby." Her gaze snagged with his and she dropped her arms to her sides, the towel falling neglected to the floor. "You"re staring," she whispered.
"You"re beautiful."