Wounded Ego

Warnings: Bad words!

KAZUKI

The moment I woke up, a bright light from above hurt my eyes forcing me to shut them again.

"Good morning, sunshine." I jolted up when I heard Aki"s voice.

"Aki?!" I jumped in confusion while staring at him, who was grinning like crazy. I winced as I held my forehead. "What happened?"

"What happened?" He repeated my question while still smirking for some reason. "You went into heat. That"s what happened." He spoke with an irritated tone at the end while handing me a gla.s.s of water and a white tablet. "Here, drink this." He told me and obeyed. 

After taking the medicine, Aki took the gla.s.s and put it away. He then went back and sat on the plastic chair that was next to me. Then, I noticed that I was on a bed.

"Where am I?"

"In my clinic." Was his short reply.

"The last thing I remember was… I was attacked by Fujiwarsan. Then he made me sniff something. It was… it was some kind of heat-inducing drug and after that…" I brokenly recalled the events that occurred before my heat attacked me. "After that, I…" I covered my hanging mouth in shock while my whole face flushed. "Okuda! Where is he?!" I asked in distraught when I finally remembered what happened.

"Oh, that guy? I dunno." Aki answered without any care.

"What do you mean you don"t know? He carried me out of the building when things got complicated and—"

"He brought you here, Kicchan. I was surprised myself too, you know?" He cut off. "He was out of breath and could barely walk but he was still able to send you here despite the internal battle going inside him. He was highly affected by your heat. Even I, who has a high tolerance against Omega heats felt the effects too. It was excruciatingly painful and I felt afraid for the first time. Haha!" He narrated. 

"Was it really that bad? My heat, I mean?" I asked in distress.

"Hmm… let"s see. I had to inject myself with three shots of anti-Alpha rut to calm myself. Then I needed to give you a strong shot to subdue the heat because it was straining your body too much. After that, I had to control Okuda in case he did something idiotic and ridiculous. I didn"t want to have an unplanned threesome, you know? And then—" 

"Aki, please be more serious!" I snapped.

f.u.c.k, he was way too ridiculous!

"Haha, sorry. I was trying to make you feel better." He apologized between laughs then I saw the needle marks on his left forearm.

"You said three, but why are there five shots on your forearm? Aki, you liar!" I irritatedly thought in worry while feeling guilty because there were people implicated because of what happened to me.

I tilted my head down and let out a dismayed sigh. "I"m so sorry."

"Hey, it wasn"t your fault." He a.s.sured me and patted my shoulder as a sign of comfort and encouragement. "I think it"s Okuda that you should talk to right now."

"I can"t." Feeling depressed, I retorted back.

Aki"s brows furrowed in worry. "Why?"

"He just ended our physical relationship last night." I disclosed.

"Is that really the reason?" He unconvincingly asked me while staring at me. "Or is it that you"ve already fallen for him and you can"t accept the fact that he just ditched you?"

My body twitched in response and that made Aki smile.

Why did everything turned out to be like this? I thought that if I distanced myself to him, I would be able to prevent myself from being hurt while enjoying the warmth of his body.

No matter what I do, we couldn"t be together. 

"Kicchan, stop killing yourself."

"Eh?" I suddenly looked at Aki with my eyes wide open.

"Okuda… He… He"s your Fated Pair, right?" 

I didn"t notice myself tearing up in shock. "How did you know?"

Aki slightly pushed his gla.s.ses before answering. "I knew it… from the moment I saw him in your office."

"What? H-How?" I confusedly demanded.

"Truth be told, the moment I entered your office at that time, I already felt a heavy aura. That was the biggest reason for how I knew that he was an Alpha. Obviously, you didn"t notice, but his stare at me was dangerous. It"s almost the same as two animals who would be fighting for the sake of mating. Those were the vibes I got from him. He explained. "And I think Okuda himself wasn"t aware that he was doing it. Even though he possesses such dominance, his heart is somehow closed and shut. But, you can tell that he"s your fated pair, right?"

"Yes." I finally nodded.

"What was it like? The feeling of meeting your Fated Pair?" He asked in interest.

"It just happened so suddenly." I started. "When I first met him, I felt weak for no valid reason. I avoided shaking hands with him because I didn"t want my guess to be true. Then later that night, I went into heat. It was my body"s natural reaction to his smell. I really felt lost when he saw me masturbating while thinking of him violating me. It was the first time that I wanted to feel him inside me even though we barely knew each other. I was… yearning for his desire and it hurt my ego." I said then sighed. "So, when he looked at me with that disgusted look on his face, I was afraid. I thought, "Ah, this guy hates me." and I decided to keep it to myself. I bribed him for two reasons; I wanted to protect my ident.i.ty and I used money and reputation as an excuse so that I could mate with him. I am… so f.u.c.king lame." At that moment, tears were already streaming down my face due to the extreme agony I was feeling and I caught myself covering my face using both my hands before wailing.

All this time, I was hoping that Okuda would not see me only as his Fated Pair, but someone he would want to spend his entire life with. I was hoping for an impossible love that I hoped for so badly.

I was delusional for thinking that he would notice me, but in the end… I was not deserving enough to be accepted.

"Kazuki." For the first time, Aki said my name properly before smiling. "You weren"t at fault. Being born as an Omega was not your fault, so stop punishing yourself. It was those motherf.u.c.kers who pushed you to become an Alpha that should die. Embrace your true self and tell Okuda the truth. I know that you are afraid, but I am sure that Okuda will be the one who will free you from everything. f.u.c.k everyone who will judge you if they found out your secret. Ignore them and be happy. Take a break, will you?"

That was the most meaningful words that Aki had ever given me. He"s crazy, but he knew exactly how I really felt deep inside. 

"Thank you, Aki." I exclaimed and hugged him very tightly.

"Yeah, sure. But don"t squeeze me too much. I can"t breathe." He jokingly noted, but he hugged me back nonetheless.

~~~~~

The next day, everyone in the company found out the truth about me and I was fired. They even took my rights and p.r.o.nounced me as an unemployed Omega. I could no longer acquire decent jobs, and the fact that I had been lying for a long time, I should be put in jail. But when they knew my family history, they considered giving me a chance.

My subordinates were all sad about the news, but I was rather glad when they said that I was going away, not because they found out that I was an Omega.

"Shimadsan, we won"t ever forget you. For me, you"re still awesome whether you"re an Alpha or an Omega." Moriya cried.

"Thanks for everything. You guys were great subordinates and people." I said while smiling slightly.

"It"s such a pity that Okuda will be gone. Waah!" Chiaki Amamiya said as she cried.

"I know." I agreed and smiled sadly. Then, I found myself looking at his area.

He didn"t come in today and there was no excuse letter or anything. I just a.s.sumed that maybe he didn"t want to see me after what happened yesterday. I totally understood, but…

Are things just gonna end like this?

"Shimadsan, if ever you find yourself with nowhere to stay and need support, my family and I are willing to help you." Moriya offered.

"Tsk! Your shack is overcrowded! You shameless b.a.s.t.a.r.d, you want Shimadsan to live there?!" Amamiya quickly cried out and the two glared daggers at each other.

"Our house is clean, ah! It may be old, but it"s still standing tall!" Moriya defended. 

They continued arguing while I packed my things, I bid my farewells to them and properly declined Moriya"s offer. They cried and cried like little children. It was painful for me to leave the life I had and the people who I deemed as friends, but I chose to free myself.

This way, I didn"t have to hide anymore.

"All I have to do from now on is to start living as an Omega and tell Okuda the truth."

I doubt that he would accept me as his Fated Pair, but just in case he didn"t, I only wanted to see his face one more time.

I didn"t know Okuda"s address, but I was happy when Aki told me where he lived. He told me that Okuda visited his clinic sometimes. The day when the two of them first met and Aki went through the log books and saw his record. He didn"t tell me why Okuda went there, but he encouraged me to go to Okuda"s place no matter what.

It"s been two weeks since that day I was nearly attacked. I heard news that Fujiwara was imprisoned. 

Well… for now, I could still support myself using my bank savings, but soon enough. I would wander off the streets. And I still owe Okuda a lot.

I arrived at Okuda"s place, or rather his own house? I was amazed to see how big it was, because you see… He only had an average job!

"I only lived in an apartment previously…" I kind of irritatedly rebuked in my head for a moment. I got afraid of continuing with my plan to meet him.

It"s not that I was expecting he would accept me and let me stay in his house. I mean, it would be great, but… I was hoping. 

I did bring my personal things with me but only because I planned to look for somewhere to stay, so I hope that Okuda wouldn"t misinterpret that I wanted to stay in his house because I"m now unemployed.

Before pressing the doorbell, I looked around and noticed his garage that was left open and my jaw dropped when I saw an expensive looking car and a huge bike that were parked inside. From the looks of it, millions were the prices of each vehicle.

"Could it be that I got the wrong address?" I started to feel nervous and had second thoughts. 

Was Okuda faking his ident.i.ty too?

I gathered all of my courage and pushed the doorbell. Every second that pa.s.sed while I stood there, I felt like pa.s.sing out. I had no f.u.c.king idea where to start if Okuda showed up.

"What the f.u.c.k am I doing? After all the s.h.i.t that happened, I"m the last person that he would want to see." I told myself feeling complicated and turned around to leave, but the door was then opened.

I instantly felt weak the moment I saw his face. He was surprised to see me and was even puzzled when he saw my things and well… quite ragged looking figure. I lost some weight due to lack of sleep, stress, and improper intake of food. My heat kept coming back and I felt so hopeless since I didn"t take any medicine.

"Why are you here?" He asked, I was just glad he didn"t sound mad.

"It"s… It"s not what you think!" I said on reflex.

"Huh?" He frowned, confused.

"I mean… You didn"t show up for two weeks and I was—I mean, THEY!" I exclaimed while correcting myself and choked when Okuda looked more confused at what I was doing. "They were all worried about you. Moriya and the others…?"

"Moriysan, huh?" Okuda looked at me and deadpanned, not believing what I just said.

"I got fired." I told him.

Okuda"s eyes widened. 

I clenched my fists and forcefully encouraged myself. "They found out I was an Omega and fired me. They also took my rights, so I could no longer apply for any decent jobs." I strainedly swallowed when I saw Okuda staring at me and like he was waiting for me to finish explaining. "I"m not here to ask you to let me stay at your place, or… or something like that. Well… I"m almost out of money, but I was planning to find a new place to stay, a cheaper one to be exact, so… so, uh, I thought… I wanted to let you know."

After I finished speaking, I just tightly closed my eyes in vexation when I realized my idiocy.

He didn"t move, so I thought that he really had no interest in conversing with me. Even if it made me feel heavy, I tried to make out a smirk as though my idiocy from before was just nonsense.

"What the h.e.l.l am I doing?" I scoffed and my chest tightened. "Sorry for disturbing you, Okuda. I just… I just wanted to let you know. B-Bye." And I quickly turned to hide the tears that I was resisting and finally fell from my eyes.

"Is that what you really feel?" He suddenly asked, which made me jump. "Did you really just come here to tell me that you were fired and that you are moving on?"

"It"s—"

"Shimadsenpai… No, Kazuki."

I jolted when he called me by my given name. To me, it sounded disgusting when f.u.kiwara was the one saying it, but it was totally different when it was Okuda.

It made me happy.

I slowly looked his way and was astonished to see the hurt expression on his face.

"I have no right to apologize to you." He started, he clenched his hands. "I have violated you, underestimated you, insulted you, and even used my discrimination against Omegas as an excuse to hurt you more. I was no different from those Alphas who acted like s.h.i.tty b.a.s.t.a.r.ds."

"Okuda…"

"I"m sorry… and don"t go. Stay here with me, Kazuki." 

And just like that, I dropped my things and wrapped my arms around Okuda"s neck. He didn"t tell me exactly if he already knew that we were Fated Pairs, but the way he held me in his arms put me at ease.

Ah, my neck was throbbing again.

"It"s so sweet." Okuda whispered in my ear and his arms wrapped around me even tighter around my waist, he even sniffed my neck.

"Thanks for not throwing me away." I said while smiling and crying at the same time.

This felt like a dream!

Rika: WAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!! QAQ I AM SO HAPPY FOR THEM!!! ❤

Oh, and btw people! C: I saw in the author"s works that there"s a side story for this series!

So basically, it goes like this:

The links are in the t.i.tles itself, so you guys can check it out!