"Oh, okay," I said, trying to keep the hurt out of my voice.
"He was even wearing a tie," she continued. "It was weird."
"I"ll just call his cell then."
"Bye, Jane," Emma said. I turned off the phone and stood at my kitchen counter thinking about everything.
Connor hadn"t told me he was going to the funeral. Or even that it was today. I felt... betrayed? Maybe. The word was harsh and completely inappropriate. It wasn"t like he was out having fun. He was at a funeral. For a dead friend. I needed to get a grip.
I dialed his number and left a voicemail. Two words. "Water tower," I whispered into the phone, knowing he would understand the message.
We decided on the term "water tower" to signal the other when a ghost made an appearance. It seemed benign and safe, plus with it being Evan"s last communication to us, it held significance. It was our own version of a safe word for something too private to share with the outside world.
Killing time, I decided to take a shower. Under the scalding water, I inhaled deeply until my breathing became normal and I convinced myself this wasn"t a big deal. Who cared if ghosts could touch me? I didn"t really. I knew my main problem was with the fact this wasn"t something unique between me and Evan.
I took one final rinse and shut off the water. When I entered my room, wrapped in a towel, I found Connor stretched out on my bed. Handsome in his dress pants and a blue b.u.t.ton-down shirt. A loosened, striped tie hung around his neck.
"Hey," he said, sitting up.
"What are you doing here?" I asked. I tightened my grip on the towel, scared to move and have it slip. Connor eyed my outfit or lack thereof.
"I got your message. You saw one?"
I felt the water from my hair dripping down my collarbone. I forced myself to move and walked over to the dresser and pulled out some clothes. I continued to clutch the towel tight to my body. "How did you get in here?"
"Key under the gnome." My mother"s brilliant idea for a hiding place. "You said "water tower," which means there was one here. Are you okay?"
"Give me a minute." I left the room and changed in the bathroom. Being almost naked in my room with Connor would get me grounded for a lifetime if my parents found out. Not to mention it would place us both in a position neither us would necessarily want to get out of.
I changed quickly and wrung the water from my hair in a towel before brushing it. I"m a fairly low maintenance girl, but even I tried not to look like a drowned rat for my boyfriend.
Back in my room, Connor waited for me on the bed, now sitting and playing with my iPod. As soon as I sat down, he wrapped his arms around me. I didn"t even have to inhale deeply to know he smelled like soap and laundry. No smoke, no stale weed.
"You smell nice," he said, picking up a strand of damp hair and sniffing it. "What happened?"
"It"s probably no big deal."
He made a face. "You were really upset on the phone. Tell me."
"This girl... this ghost came to me last week. She needed help..."
"Wait," he cut me off. "She came a week ago? Why didn"t you tell me?"
I stared at him. Did he want me to say it? That my week was spent occupied by thoughts of Connor and his drama? I decided to just push forward. "You were busy and I wanted to handle it on my own," I said and told him about the girl and what she needed.
"This sounds pretty standard. What freaked you out?"
"She touched me."
"What?" His body stiffened next to mine.
"She could touch me. I don"t know how or why, but she did."
Connor was quiet and I turned to look at him. His expression was tight. Jaw clenched, forehead furrowed.
"I don"t know what this means."
"Me either."
He stood and began pacing it was what he did when he was uncomfortable or thinking.
"It means..."
I cut him off. "It means Evan"s ability to touch me wasn"t special. Our relationship was no different than any other ghost and guide."
He stopped moving and sat back down. He took my hand. "Trust me, it was different. I"ve never seen anything like it. Evan cared for you."
I laced my fingers with his and rubbed the fine hair on his knuckles with my thumb. "I know he did, but this is something different. That girl, Raquel, she definitely doesn"t care about me. She needed me for a purpose."
"The others didn"t have this effect did they?"
I had seen three other ghosts since Evan left. One was his mother and then two older men. I"d helped them all cross over. "It never came up. No one else tried."
"What did the girl do?"
"It"s hard to say. She was confused. I"d just dropped the news that she was dead. I don"t think she really understood what was going on."
Connor wrapped his arms tight around my waist and whispered near my ear. "I don"t like this."
I squirmed from the feeling of his breath on my skin. The very nice feeling. I pushed him back and he fell with a soft thud on my pillow. "I don"t like it either."
"Things are just..." he stopped and pulled at a piece of wet hair on my neck. "Do you think you could ask your aunt about it?"
"Jeannie? Sure. She may know something." My aunt had gifts of her own. She was able to read auras and palms. Her mother spoke to the dead like I did. "What do you mean, "Things are just...""
"Nothing. I don"t know. The touching thing is weird. And this funeral. I couldn"t go to the grave service. I mean, I know ghosts don"t actually linger at cemeteries, but seriously, I"m not pushing my luck."
"How was it?" I pulled on his tie. I"d only seen him dressed up once before. At prom last spring.
Connor placed his hands behind his head with his elbows out. "It was a funeral. Charlotte"s family was there and some kids from her school. Not a lot though. I don"t think she had many real friends."
"No?"
"No." He looked up at the ceiling. "She had a weird life. Her parents and family look like mine or yours. Upstanding and all. But there was some bad stuff going on in her house. I felt sick just being there."
"Why? What did they do?"
Connor"s eyes flicked to mine. "I can"t really go into it."
"You don"t have to."
"It"s not that I don"t want to. I can"t. Confidentiality and stuff. Charlotte"s secrets were worse than most. But she always kept mine. I don"t feel right saying anything."
I nodded. Connor was right to keep this a secret if he promised to. It was frustrating not to know, but I got it. His loyalty was one of the reasons I loved him.
"She killed herself?" I asked. He"d told me that. It didn"t seem part of the secret.
"Yeah."
Curiosity got the best of me. "How?" I asked.
He raised an eyebrow, but said, "She hung herself."
"Oh my G.o.d!"
He nodded in agreement. "It wasn"t the first time she tried."
"Is that why she was there? In the treatment facility?"
"Yeah. Kind of."
We were quiet and I ran my hand over his knee. "I"m sorry this happened to your friend."
"Thanks." He grabbed my hand. "Promise me you"ll stay safe. Don"t do anything foolish. Please don"t let any of those ghosts touch you, okay? I don"t want anything to happen to you."
"I won"t." He didn"t look convinced. "I won"t! I promise, and I"ll call Jeannie."
"Good." He sat up and swung his legs over the edge of the bed. "I should go. My mom is probably looking for me."
We walked downstairs and Connor left with his own promises to call me later that night.
"Thanks for inviting me," I said to Ava and Julia. I used my hand as a shield to see their faces past the glare of the sun. The clear sky made it the perfect day to lounge on the deck at Ava"s neighborhood pool. Ava sat to my right and Julia had her nose buried in a tabloid on my left.
"No problem. I hate coming here alone. You guys are welcome any time."
We stretched across towels, burning under the sun. Each of us had a full cup of soda, a magazine and an iPod playing music between the chairs. The sun was hot, scorching even, but it felt nice to be outside. No work. No ghosts. No drama.
"Hottie by the lifeguard stand." I saw an eyebrow arch over the top of Julia"s sungla.s.ses as she announced this.
Easy to spot, the cute guy flirted with the female lifeguard in the chair. "You mean the lifeguard"s boyfriend?"
"We can still look."
"Speaking of hot boys," Julia said. "What did you and Connor do last night?"
"Not much. We went for ice cream and watched a movie at my house. With my parents." I lifted up my sungla.s.ses so she could see me roll my eyes.
"That"s a little bit adorable."
"Shut up." I fanned my face with my magazine. It was a little bit adorable. "Do I look red? I feel like I"m getting red."
Ava looked me up and down. I poked the pale skin of my stomach to see if it left a mark. "No, but here"s some sunscreen. Can"t hurt to reapply."
I layered my skin with a coat of lotion and handed it back to her. She placed the bottle in her bag and said, "I love that he hangs out with your parents. Christian is terrified of my dad."
"Ava, your dad is terrifying. I think he may be a mobster."
"What?" She swatted me. "He is not a mobster. He"s just Italian. And from Brooklyn. He can"t help the fact he sounds different."
"Okay, okay if you say so," I laughed. "Connor doesn"t really like to hang out with my parents either, but he kind of owed me one."
"Because he ditched you the other day after art camp?"
Among other things, I wanted to say, but I just nodded.
"I suppose he deserved a bit of punishment then."
"I"m trying to cut him some slack. His friend died and he"s pretty upset."
Julia glanced up from her magazine and asked, "Who died?"
"Some girl Connor met last year when he was sent away." I didn"t elaborate. Ava and Julia didn"t know the real reason Connor left school. They thought it was because he got into so much trouble, which is true, but he was not sent to boot camp like everyone suspected. "I guess things were really bad for her. She committed suicide."
"Wait... what? Suicide?" Julia said. She put her trashy magazine down for the first time that day.
"She killed herself."
Julia sat up and swung her legs over the side of the chair so she was looking directly at me. "What was her name?"
I shrugged. "Charlotte something."
"Charlotte Brady?"
"I have no idea. Connor didn"t tell me."
"It has to be the same girl," she said under her breath.
"What are you talking about?"
Julia leaned over and began speaking in a low whisper. "Charlotte Brady"s aunt and uncle go to my church. My mom delivered food to their house yesterday."
"Connor went to the funeral yesterday morning."
"Weird."