Yamato Nadeshiko, Koibana no Gotoku

It all started with something I said.

「Why must something like adolescence exist? It would be fine if something like that was destroyed.」

「Na-Nadeshiko. Please don’t say such a dangerous thing all of a sudden.」

「Ara, big brother, sorry. My actual feelings slipped out.」

「…… those were your real feelings. I’m a little scared.」

Big brother was watching television in his pajamas.
It was unusual for him to watch TV in the living room until late at night.
Even though I wasn’t interested in what was on TV, I did lots of things with big brother just to stay near him.

「Why is adolescence making an enemy of Nadeshiko?」

「Because it is an obstruction to me. Big brother won’t openly give me his love.」

「…… so how is that connected to adolescence?」

「There are children who, after a certain age, try to separate from their mother, right? To have increased the distance between us for a reason like embarra.s.sment, doesn’t it seem similar?」

Big brother loves me.
I hold no doubt about that.
However, he seems to feel that his image as a brother who has too close of a relationship with his sister was embarra.s.sing.
That att.i.tude is one that I am unable to forgive by all means.

「A-adolescence or whatever cannot be helped right?」

「In that case, starting from tomorrow, will you openly declare that you love me?」

「I want to protect my current school life. There’s only two years after this, let me pa.s.s through it peacefully and uneventfully.」

You see, this is the problem.
Worried about the gazes of other people, he is embarra.s.sed so he tries to conceal his thoughts of embracing me.

「I don’t even particularly mind a big brother who is seen as an overly siscon brother in other people’s eyes .」

「But I would mind! Rather, wouldn’t I be the only one that would be receiving major damage?」

「……Muuuuu. I think it would be better for big brother to become honest with himself. You’re awful.」

While looking down, I quietly sit down on the same sofa big brother is sitting on.
I like the times when I can take my time to speak with Big brother.

「Please remember, the big brother in the past was very kind to me.」

「Even though I intend to be gentle even now.」

「The point where you are not honest is a minus point.」

When I leaned against his shoulder, he slowly caressed my head.
That part of him was truly kind.
Though if seen from other people’s eyes, he spoiled me like a lover would.

「Shall we talk about nostalgic stories? When I was a child, I was bad at getting along with people, and always just followed big brother when we were playing. Big sister and I had a significant age gap, so there was n.o.body else who could be my playmate. My world was only Big brother.」

I was always staring at his back that was slightly bigger than mine.
Big brother was gentler than anyone, and lavished me with smiles.

「Those days, I really had few friends, and big brother was the only important I person I felt I could talk to. And there was…… something that happened that summer in first grade. When I tripped and got hurt and couldn’t walk, big brother carried me like a princess, literally.」

「…… pft?!」

「Fufu. Seems like I was able to make you remember that. That’s right, when I got hurt, and couldn’t move and cried, you held me in a princess carry and brought me home. At that time, big brother said to me:」

As I was held in big brother’s arms, the pain from the injury or whatever was forgotten.
He said to me in a gentle voice.

『For me, Nadeshiko is a princess, so I’ll always protect you, okay? 』

Even now, you’ve kept your word; you’ve always been by my side, protecting me.

「Those words still remain inside me as one of my precious memories. If I am a princess to big brother, then big brother has always been my prince.」

「P-please stop! Please stop exposing my past!!」

Big brother had an embarra.s.sed face that said he wanted to climb into a hole.
I wanted to see more of that expression, so I continued my talk.

「There’s still more. It was when I was in my third year of elementary school.」

「There’s still more?!」

「There’s much, much more. Because in the 15 years of my life that I have spent with my beloved big brother, I have made a lot of irreplaceable memories.」

My memories with big brother were endless.

「That time was the first time I went to swim in the ocean. Although I had experience in the pool, it was the first time I had seen the sea with my own eyes. Do you remember that day when the three of us, big brother, mother, and I, went to the sea together?」

「…… erm?」

He looked like he was in the middle of recalling his memory with all his might.

「It doesn’t look like you remember, hmm. In that case, I will remind you. We were fully enjoying the sea. I, who was overjoyed with my first visit to the ocean, wasn’t yet able to swim well, yet right from the start I wanted to head out towards the open seas.」

「――Nugyaaaaa!」

Big brother’s painful cry echoed in the living room.
Somehow, he remembered and his face turned pale.

「And sure enough, I started drowning in a place where my feet didn’t reach. Big brother, who panicked, was still going to come to my rescue, but because big brother was still a child, saving me was difficult. And then…..」

「Wait. Seriously, please wait, don’t say another word. You don’t have to say it!」

Big brother tried to cover my mouth.
While avoiding his hand, I narrated the past event to big brother.

「When Big brother saved me, it was like Big brother was embracing me. However, though my hand had been grasped, my chest still hadn’t expanded. That’s right, though they were small, while I was unconscious, big brother pa.s.sionately rubbed my b.r.e.a.s.t.s with both hands!」

「Noo!! It was different, at that time I was desperate, so there was completely zero intention of s.e.xual hara.s.sment.」

「I know. When you try to save a drowning child, there will be things like that. Incidents in the water are dangerous. Big brother grabbing and rubbing my small b.r.e.a.s.t.s wasn’t life-changing for me either. In the same way that my b.r.e.a.s.t.s were tightly grasped, my heart has also been caught by Big brother.」

「T-That was a rescue. I didn’t rub a little girl’s b.r.e.a.s.t.s or anything. I didn’t even grab them?!」

While my cheeks were dyed red, big brother swore to me.

「Kusu kusu,1 big brother was the one who made my b.r.e.a.s.t.s grow this big.」

「Ugagagaga…… save me, somebody save me. You’ve sent my past self flying without holding back enough already.」

He hung his head.
His appearance was a bit cute, so I couldn’t help but tease him.

「Please don’t get depressed. I don’t dislike your past self. To have received that much love makes me glad.」

「Right now, I want to cry and also kill my past self.」

I whispered to my depressed big brother, 「Is it okay if I give the finishing blow?」

「Finishing blow?! T-There’s still……. something else?」

「There is. The best. Big brother seems to have forgotten about it.」

「……life is long, and I have many things I’d like to forget.」

While I rested my hands on his crestfallen, drooping shoulders,

「Back during fifth grade in elementary school, it was in spring, the season of cherry blossoms. We were viewing the cherry-blossoms together, and then big brother had said to me.」

While watching the beautiful scene of cherry blossoms dancing and falling,

「Nadeshiko is really cute. To me, Nadeshiko is a more adorable flower than these cherry blossoms.」

After that, big brother suddenly brought his face closer towards me,

『I love you…… because Nadeshiko is my younger sister, I won’t give you to anyone else.』

Just remembering it made my face flush red, thinking about big brother’s possessiveness.
And then, to my lips, big brother slowly……

「I-I remembered!! I remembered, so please forgive me with just that much. I beg of you. If anyone knew about it, my life would be finished.」

「Kusu, I’m happy that you remembered it. It’s scary not being able to change the past, isn’t it?」

「Do you plan on telling anyone about that…. you don’t. You wouldn’t right? Right?!」

He appeared to be panicking; was he so upset at the idea that I might tell someone?

「I won’t tell. As long as big brother doesn’t betray me. If by chance there comes a time when that happens, please prepare yourself, okay? I know lots of big brother’s secrets. I might expose all of them.」

As soon as I mentioned secrets, big brother’s face changed color.

「W-what kind of secrets?」

「Other secrets which have the ability to destroy big brother’s social standing, okay?」

When I smiled radiantly, big brother said to me while shaking,

「Of course, could you keep those secrets a secret?」

「It wasn’t my intention to threaten you or anything. I just thought of sharing wonderful memories from the past, isn’t that the case?」

「……」

「Fufu. The time and memories that I have acc.u.mulated with big brother are too numerous for another person to come in between us. Please continue to love me wholeheartedly from now on, big brother♪」

To love and to be loved.
I am enjoying this relationship from the bottom of my heart.
If there is someone who will disturb this happiness, I will never forgive them.

「I like big brother. I won’t give you to anyone else. For that purpose…..」

「….. what are you planning to do? Are you plotting something strange again?」

I gave an implication to big brother who had instinctively gone on guard, and

「I wonder? There’s a lot of things I need to think about. Because my high school life has also just barely started, you see. I also haven’t entirely grasped big brother’s current situation yet, so I plan to wait and see.」

「Though I want you to stay like that and not do anything.」

「That depends on big brother’s behavior.」

I whispered to him who had a distant look in his eyes.

「If you’re worried about my behavior, there’s an easy solution, big brother.」

「What?」

「Please hurry and be honest with yourself, and make me your lover. Let’s deepen our love for each other. chuu~」

「It’s because that’s no good. D-Don’t bring your lips closer.」

Big brother shied away and moved some distance away from me.

「Big brother is really a shy person, huh」

「It would be better if Nadeshiko would be more embarra.s.sed.」

「Even I am embarra.s.sed, you know. Because Big brother’s actions always make me excited.」

Each and every one of his words and actions made my heart race.
Ever since I fell in love with big brother, my world has been overflowing with happiness.

【 To be continued 】