"This is DogsofSETI. What a wonderful discovery you"ve made-intelligent life in our own Solar System! Why is the government trying to cover this up?"
"Uh..."
"I"m Joseph Devries. This alien monster must be destroyed immediately. We can"t afford the possibility that it"s hostile."
"StudPudgie07 here. What"s the dirt behind this "l.u.s.t" thing? Advanced minds need to know!
If O"Brien isn"t going to share the details, then why"d she bring it up in the first place?"
"Hola, soy Pedro Dominguez. Como abogado, esto me parece ultrajante! Por que NAFTASA nos oculta esta informacion?"
"Alan!" Lizzie shouted. "What the f.u.c.k is going on?"
"Script-bunnies," Alan said. He sounded simultaneously apologetic and annoyed. "They hacked into your confession and apparently you said something..."
"We"re sorry, Lizzie," Consuelo said. "We really are. If it"s any consolation, the Archdiocese ofMontreal is hopping mad. They"re talking about taking legal action."
"Legal action? What the h.e.l.l do I care about...?"She stopped.
Without her willing it, one hand rose above her head and seized the number 10 rope.
Don"t do that, she thought.
The other hand went out to the side, tightened against the number 9 rope. She hadn"t willed that either. When she tried to draw it back to her, it refused to obey. Then the first hand-her right hand-moved a few inches upward and seized its rope in an iron grip. Her left hand slid a good half-foot up its rope. Inch by inch, hand over hand, she climbed up toward the balloon.
I"ve gone mad, she thought. Her right hand was gripping the rip panel now, and the other tightly clenched rope 8. Hanging effortlessly from them, she swung her feet upward. She drew her knees against her chest and kicked.
No!
The fabric ruptured and she began to fall.
A voice she could barely make out said, "Don"t panic. We"re going to bring you down."
All in a panic, she s.n.a.t.c.hed at the 9 rope and the 4 rope. But they were limp in her hand, useless, falling at the same rate she was.
"Be patient."
"I don"t want to die, G.o.dd.a.m.nit!"
"Then don"t."
She was falling helplessly. It was a terrifying sensation, an endless plunge into whiteness, slowed somewhat by the tangle of ropes and balloon trailing behind her. She spread out her arms and legs like a starfish, and felt the air resistance slow her yet further. The sea rushed up at her with appalling speed. It seemed like she"d been falling forever. It was over in an instant.
Without volition, Lizzie kicked free of balloon and harness, drew her feet together, pointed her toes, and positioned herself perpendicular to t.i.tan"s surface. She smashed through the surface of the sea, sending enormous gouts of liquid splashing upward. It knocked the breath out of her. Red pain exploded within. She thought maybe she"d broken a few ribs.
"You taught us so many things," the gentle voice said. "You gave us so much."
"Help me!" The water was dark around her. The light was fading.
"Multiplicity. Motion. Lies. You showed us a universe infinitely larger than the one we had known."
"Look. Save my life and we"ll call it even. Deal?"
"Grat.i.tude. Such an essential concept."
"Thanks. I think."
And then she saw the turbot swimming toward her in a burst of silver bubbles. She held out her arms and the robot fish swam into them. Her fingers closed about the handles which Consuelo had used to wrestle the device into the sea. There was a jerk, so hard that she thought for an instant that her arms would be ripped out of their sockets. Then the robofish was surging forward and upward and it was all she could do to keep her grip.
"Oh, dear G.o.d!" Lizzie cried involuntarily.
"We think we can bring you to sh.o.r.e. It will not be easy."
Lizzie held on for dear life. At first she wasn"t at all sure she could. But then she pulled herself forward, so that she was almost astride the speeding mechanical fish, and her confidence returned. She could do this. It wasn"t any harder than the time she"d had the flu and aced her gymnastics final on parallel bars and horse anyway. It was just a matter of grit and determination. She just had to keep her wits about her. "Listen," she said. "If you"re really grateful..."
"We are listening."
"We gave you all those new concepts. There must be things you know that we don"t."
A brief silence, the equivalent of who knew how much thought. "Some of our concepts might cause you dislocation." A pause. "But in the long run, you will be much better off. The scars will heal. You will rebuild. The chances of your destroying yourselves are well within the limits of acceptability."
"Destroying ourselves?" For a second, Lizzie couldn"t breathe. It had taken hours for the city/ent.i.tyto come to terms with the alien concepts she"d dumped upon it. Human beings thought and lived at a much slower rate than it did. How long would those hours be, translated into human time? Months?
Years? Centuries? It had spoken of scars and rebuilding. That didn"t sound good at all.
Then the robofish accelerated, so quickly that Lizzie almost lost her grip. The dark waters were whirling around her, and unseen flecks of frozen material were bouncing from her helmet. She laughed wildly. Suddenly, she felt great!
"Bring it on," she said. "I"ll take everything you"ve got."
It was going to be one h.e.l.l of a ride.
Knapsack Poems
ELEANOR ARNASON.
Eleanor Arnason (tribute page ) lives in Minneapolis, Minnesota. She has been publishing interesting, ambitious SF since the 1970s, but her major work began appearing and drawing attention only in the 1990s, beginning with the novels A Woman of the Iron People (1991) and Ring of Swords (1993). Since then she has published a number of stories, most of them novellas, set either in the Hwarhath universe of Ring of Swords, or in the Lydia Duluth series. Her work is notable for its political subtexts, its feminist spin without feminist rhetoric, and investigation of gender roles. The Goxhat are an alien race in the Duluth universe whose individual bodies (only vaguely humanoid-they have four eyes, etc.), some males, some females, some neuter, together form gestalt or group personalities. Goxhat are really weird, but in their inner lives quite human, and often funny."Knapsack Poems" appeared in Asimov"s and has only Goxhat characters, with the central character a traveling poet whose selves continually argue and discuss and have s.e.x, who is poor and willing to sell poetic praise for food or money. Many things human are called into question in this amusing tale as an alien poet just trying to get by reinvents something humans already have.
Within this person of eight bodies, thirty-two eyes, and the usual number of orifices and limbs, resides a spirit as restless as gossamer on wind. In youth, I dreamed of fame as a merchant-traveler. In later years, realizing that many of my parts were p.r.o.ne to motion sickness, I thought of scholarship or accounting. But I lacked the Great Determination that is necessary for both trades. My abilities are spontaneous and brief, flaring and vanishing like a falling star. For me to spend my life adding numbers or looking through dusty doc.u.ments would be like "lighting a great hall with a single lantern bug" or "watering a great garden with a drop of dew."
Finally, after consulting the care-givers in my creche, I decided to become a traveling poet. It"s a strenuous living and does not pay well, but it suits me.
Climbing through the mountains west of Ibri, I heard a wishik call, then saw the animal, its wings like white petals, perched on a bare branch.
"Is that tree flowering So late in autumn?
Ridiculous idea!
I long for dinner."
One of my bodies recited the poem. Another wrote it down, while still others ranged ahead, looking for signs of habitation. As a precaution, I carried cudgels as well as pens and paper. One can never be sure what will appear in the country west of Ibri. The great poet Raging Fountain died there of a combination of diarrhea and malicious ghosts. Other writers, hardly less famous, have been killed by monsters or bandits, or, surviving these, met their end at the hands of dissatisfied patrons.
The Bane of Poets died before my birth. Its1 ghost or ghosts offered Raging Fountain the fatal bowl of porridge. But other patrons still remain "on steep slopes and in stony dales."
"Dire the telling Of patrons in Ibri: Bone-breaker lurks High on a mountain.
Skull-smasher waits In a shadowy valley.
Better than these The country has only Grasper, Bad-bargain, And h.o.a.rder-of-Food."
Why go to such a place, you may be wondering? Beyond Ibri"s spiny mountains lie the wide fields of Greater and Lesser Ib, prosperous lands well-known for patronage of the arts.
Late in the afternoon, I realized I would find no refuge for the night. Dark snow-clouds hid the hills in front of me. Behind me, low in the south, the sun shed pale light. My shadows, long and many-limbed, danced ahead of me on the rutted road.
My most poetic self spoke: "The north is blocked By clouds like boulders.
A winter sun Casts shadows in my way."
Several of my other selves frowned. My scribe wrote the poem down with evident reluctance.
"Too obvious," muttered a cudgel-carrier.
Another self agreed. "Too much like Raging Fountain in his/her mode of melancholy complaint."
Far ahead, a part of me cried alarm. I suspended the critical discussion and hurried forward in a clump, my clubs raised and ready for use.
Soon, not even breathless, I stopped at a place I knew by reputation: the Tooth River. Wide and shallow, it ran around pointed stones, well-exposed this time of year and as sharp as the teeth of predators. On the far side of the river were bare slopes that led toward cloudy mountains. On the near side of the river, low cliffs cast their shadows over a broad sh.o.r.e. My best scout was there, next to a bundle of cloth. The scout glanced up, saw the rest of me, and-with deft fingers-undid the blanket folds.
Two tiny forms lay curled at the blanket"s center. A child of one year, holding itself in its arms.
"Alive?" I asked myself.
The scout crouched closer. "One body is and looks robust. The other body-" my scout touched it gently "-is cold."
Standing among myself, I groaned and sighed. There was no problem understanding what had happened. A person had given birth. Either the child had been unusually small, or the other parts had died. For some reason, the parent had been traveling alone. Maybe he/she/it had been a petty merchant or a farmer driven off the land by poverty. If not these, then a wandering thief or someone outlawed for heinous crimes. A person with few resources. In any case, he/she/it had carried the child to this bitter place, where the child"s next-to- last part expired.
Imagine standing on the river"s icy edge, holding a child who had become a single body. The parent could not bear to raise an infant so incomplete! What parent could? One did no kindness by raising such a cripple to be a monster among ordinary people.
Setting the painful burden down, the parent crossed the river.
I groaned a second time. My most poetic self said: "Two bodies are not enough; One body is nothing."
The rest of me hummed agreement. The poet added a second piece of ancient wisdom: "Live in a group Or die."
I hummed a second time. The scout lifted the child from its blanket. "It"s female."
The baby woke and cried, waving her four arms, kicking her four legs, and urinating. My scout held her as far away as possible. Beyond doubt, she was a fine, loud, active mite! But incomplete. "Why did you wake her?" asked a cudgel-carrier. "She should be left to die in peace."
"No," said the scout. "She will come with me."
"Me! What do you mean by me?" my other parts cried.
There is neither art nor wisdom in a noisy argument. Therefore, I will not describe the discussion that followed as night fell. Snowflakes drifted from the sky-slowly at first, then more and more thickly. I spoke with the rudeness people reserve for themselves in privacy; and the answers I gave myself were sharp indeed. Words like pointed stones, like the boulders in Tooth River, flew back and forth. Ah! The wounds I inflicted and suffered! Is anything worse than internal dispute?
The scout would not back down. She had fallen in love with the baby, as defective as it was. The cudgel-bearers, st.u.r.dy males, were outraged. The poet and the scribe, refined neuters, were repulsed.
The rest of me was female and a bit more tender.
I had reached the age when fertile eggs were increasingly unlikely. In spite of my best efforts, I had gained neither fame nor money. What respectable goxhat would mate with a vagabond like me? What creche would offer to care for my offspring? Surely this fragment of a child was better than nothing.
"No!" said my males and neuters. "This is not a person! One body alone can never know togetherness or integration!"
But my female selves edged slowly toward the scout"s opinion. Defective the child certainly was.
Still, she was alive and goxhat, her darling little limbs waving fiercely and her darling mouth making noises that would shame a monster.
Most likely, she would die. The rest of her had. Better that she die in someone"s arms, warm and comfortable, than in the toothy mouth of a prowling predator. The scout rewrapped the child in the blanket.
It was too late to ford the river. I made camp under a cliff, huddling together for warmth, my arms around myself, the baby in the middle of the heap I made.
When morning came, the sky was clear. Snow sparkled everywhere. I rose, brushed myself off, gathered my gear, and crossed the river. The water was low, as I expected this time of year, but ice-cold. My feet were numb by the time I reached the far side. My teeth chattered on every side like castanets. The baby, awakened by the noise, began to cry. The scout gave her a sweet cake. That stopped the crying for a while.
At mid-day, I came in sight of a keep. My hearts lifted with hope. Alas! Approaching it, I saw the walls were broken.
The ruination was recent. I walked through one of the gaps and found a courtyard, full of snowy heaps. My scouts spread out and investigated. The snow hid bodies, as I expected. Their eyes were gone, but most of the rest remained, preserved by cold and the season"s lack of bugs.
"This happened a day or two ago," my scouts said. "Before the last snow, but not by much. Wishik found them and took what they could, but didn"t have time-before the storm-to find other predators and lead them here. This is why the bodies are still intact. The wishik can pluck out eyes, but skin is too thick for them to penetrate. They need the help of other animals, such as hirg." One of the scouts crouched by a body and brushed its rusty back hair. "I won"t be able to bury these. There are too many."
"How many goxhat are here?" asked my scribe, taking notes.
"It"s difficult to say for certain. Three or four, I suspect, all good-sized. A parent and children would be my guess."
I entered the keep building and found more bodies. Not many. Most of the inhabitants had fallen in the courtyard. There was a nursery with scattered toys, but no children.
"Ah! Ah!" I cried, reflecting on the briefness of life and the frequency with which one encounters violence and sorrow.
My poet said: "Broken halls and scattered wooden words.
How will the children learn to read and write?" 2 Finally I found a room with no bodies or toys, nothing to remind me of mortality. I lit a fire and settled for the night. The baby fussed. My scout cleaned her, then held her against a nursing bud-for comfort only; the scout had no milk. The baby sucked. I ate my meager rations. Darkness fell. My thirty-two eyes reflected firelight. After a while, a ghost arrived. Glancing up, I saw it in the doorway. It looked quite ordinary: three goxhat bodies with rusty hair.
"Who are you?" one of my scouts asked.