Your Majesty Please Calm Down

PPS: As you can very well see, there are still a few changes on the website, and there might be more. I appreciate any suggestions you might have. I would like the text to be accessible to everyone.

I`m a.s.suming that I will get faster and better at translating after a few chapters, so, after March, you might get a chapter every 2 days. I`m also looking forward to find out what happens next in the story and moving to the other dropped translations I have been wanting to read for a while. If there are other readers that want to work together on translating specific novels, don"t hesitate to let me know.

And lastly, novel planet is up to date with the stolen translation. I appreciate everyone who reads this story from tune my website dot com. 

Tian Qi was working in the Yang Xin Palace every day and often ran into officials having an audience with the Emperor. However, the three (3) most competent government officials came together for the first time. As a small eunuch, she was naturally not qualified to listen to discussions of this level, thus she withdrew tactfully.

She also felt that, when it came to important matters, the less you knew – the better. If you didn’t have the ability to take care of the wind and rain, in that case, you mustn’t walk through wind and rain.

Today, Sheng AnHuai was busy sorting out the items that will be used during the Dragon Boat Festival, therefore he didn’t come around and the eunuchs of Yang Xin Palace trusted Tian Qi entirely as their leader. There was nothing she could do about it. Although she was not a high grade eunuch, everyone was aware she gained the Emperor’s trust. This way, she unconsciously became somewhat of a rising star in the servants’ community. Tian Qi’s feeling were mixed. It was naturally good to have one’s master’s trust and put one in an important position, however, when one stuck out too much, the wind had a tendency to be stronger and one could lose their way.

Hence, she did not dare to act bossy, keeping a low profile and behaving in a guileless, honest way. The more important she became, the more she tuck her tail between her legs. Ji Heng was quite pleased with her performance. As long as Ji Heng was satisfied, Sheng AnHuai, her supervisor, was even more pleased.

Tian Qi waited for half an hour in front of the Yang Xin Palace. When the three (3) top government ministers came out, they each had different expressions. The first a.s.sistant, Zheng QiYi had his same – ten thousand years old – gentle smile. The second a.s.sistant, Sun CongRui, had his eyebrows furrowed, as if he had a load on his mind. The last one to come out was Tang RuoLing. Even though he was the youngest amongst these three officials, he entered officialdom early. His face betrayed no emotions. As Tian Qi saw them off Yang Xin Palace, he thanked her.

Tian Qi was surprised. It was important to know that eunuchs were considered an awkward existence that the Emperor did not like (because they ama.s.sed too much power during the previous Emperor’s reign) and numerous officials looked down upon them. She was not like Sheng AnHuai, an existence second to none in the Government. For such a small eunuch to have received the earnest thanks of the magnificent minister of the Minister of Revenue, she felt a little overwhelmed.

Tian Qi glanced at the other two ministers. First a.s.sistant Zheng was still smiling, whilst Sun CongRui glanced at her once, contempt obvious in his eyes. She was aware that the look of contempt was not directed at her, but at Tang RuoLing. Sun CongRui might have thought that Tang RuoLing was deliberately going out of his way to get in the good graces of a small eunuch, ba? This kind of action would have naturally been despised.

ba – modal particle indicating suggestion/surmise = right? / ok? / I presume

Sun CongRui noticed Tian Qi looking at him. He returned Tian Qi’s glance, however he quickly seemed distracted. He quickly returned to his senses and looked away as if nothing happened.

Tian Qi didn’t pay attention to him, and exchanged a few polite words with Tang RuoLing, then watched them leave.

She turned around and thought about what she just saw. Sun CongRui was in a bad mood, could he have been scolded by the Emperor? That wasn’t likely. No matter how one persuaded, he was a tempered subject, and the Emperor wouldn’t have scolded his second a.s.sistant in the presence of the other two ministers.

Truly a pity, a. Thinking again, Tian Qi shook her head. Looking at the events that just occurred, Sun CongRui appeared to have been invisible to Tang RuoLing. She also knew that the government was only so big, with just a few people who governed the country, and took care of all the matters that needed settled. In addition, when a small eunuch could vie with them for a few taels of silver, it became an – I live, you die – type of situation. That sort of high position would naturally be a place where they fiercely fought and schemed against each other a hundred times.

a – modal particle ending a sentence, showing affirmation, approval, consent; interjection of surprise/expressing doubt or requiring answer/grunt of agreement = uhm, ah, ok etc.

But this was none of her business. Tian Qi hit her own head and walked back to Yang Xin Palace.

Although this matter did not involve her, nevertheless, Tian Qi soon got to know the behind the scenes story. And the source was 100% reliable, seeing that it was none other than the Zheng First a.s.sistant’s son, Zheng ShaoFeng.

Zheng ShaoFeng complained that he only receives his allowance at the beginning of the month, hence he was still unable to pay his debt. Tian Qi felt it was not adequate for her to take advantage of the situation and strike him down. She got out of the Palace and went to play. Therefore Zheng ShaoFeng’s whole face looked bitter as he pushed his birdcage in front of Tian Qi “These next few months, it is important that I study diligently, so I ask that you take care of my Ling er.”

(name) er – diminutive suffix = little (name)

Tian Qi glanced at the cage. Inside, the small, white bird, hua mei, became very energetic, opening it’s beak and teasing, its voice very pleasant. Tian Qi pointed at the white huamei and asked “You gave the white huamei the name of a brown lark. Did it agree to it?”

huamei = bird species in China = melodious laughingthrush

Zheng ShaoFeng answered gloomily “Why aren’t you asking why I want to go in seclusion and study?”

“What use is it to ask this? It must be because your dad beat you and forced you to study.”

Zheng ShaoFeng shook his head “This is the second reason.”

So he told Tian Qi everything he had on his mind. These few days, Zheng ShaoFeng met with several matchmakers, but the woman dismissed him, saying that he has no future prospects, a fiend in human form. Under grief and indignation, he decided to partic.i.p.ate in this year’s imperial exam (Xiangs.h.i.+), to show his great drive through testing and receive scholarly honour.

Xiangs.h.i.+ = the triennial provincial imperial exams

Tian Qi extended three (3) fingers “I know you are a shade, and you can immediately join the imperial exam, but now we are only three (3) months away from the autumn exam (QiuWei). Everyone else has been studying hard for at least ten (10) years, and you believe a three(3) – month crash course will be enough?”

QiuWei = autumn examination from the triennial provincial exam during Ming and Qing dynasties

“I have also been studying before, and the main examiner for this imperial exam is Sun DaRen. He’s always had a good relations.h.i.+p with my father.”

DaRen = t.i.tle of respect towards superiors

He only started to think about it and still hasn’t had his test yet. Tian Qi clicked her tongue and shook her head. “Which Sun DaRen?”

“The Director of the Board of Rites, Sun CongRui Sun DaRen. The day before yesterday the Emperor and a few ministers discussed this matter and finally determined who is to be the next examiner. However, this hasn’t been announced yet, you can’t tell this to anybody else. Originally, the Emperor intended to choose between Sun DaRen and Tang DaRen, but Tang DaRen‘s son will also partic.i.p.ate in this year’s imperial exams. In order to avoid arousing suspicion, Tang DaRen could not be considered anymore.”

Tian Qi listened to him talking and, after putting two and two together, she immediately understood Ji Heng’s intention. She could only shake her head and smile. “As if it is ever this simple, doing this just to avoid arousing suspicion. Clearly, the Emperor wanted to see the reaction of Sun CongRui.”

Zheng ShaoFeng was somewhat confused “What do you mean?”

“Being this year’s chief examiner for the Capital’s exams, naturally means that next year he cannot be one anymore.” The spring’s civil service (ChunWei) was the most important part of the exams where one could exhibit their talents,ma.

ChunWei = metropolitan civil service examination 
ma = modal particle indicating that something is obvious (Dóh)

“Anyway, although the Ministry of Rites will be in charge of the imperial civil service examination (Huis.h.i.+), but the Director of the Board of Rites cannot be the examiner every year. Then the next spring’s civil service (ChunWei) exam also can"t be managed by the same examiner.”

Noticing that he still couldn’t understand, Tian Qi couldn’t help but shake her head and sigh. “Idiot, a, idiot. Let me ask you: how is Tang DaRen‘s son at school?”

“Very good. People in the gambling house have begun to pressure him to win first-placed candidate in the provincial imperial examinations.”

Jie Yuan = first-placed candidate in the provincial imperial examinations

“That means that, as long as there are no accidents, Tang DaRen‘s son will certainly pa.s.s the provincial level imperial examinations this year. In that case, he can also take part in the Huis.h.i.+ (imperial civil service examination) next year. Supposing the Huis.h.i.+ is presided over by Sun CongRui, in case something happens and Tang RuoLing’s son doesn’t pa.s.s brilliantly, that’s enough for him (SCR) to be disciplined. It should be fine if Sun CongRui and Tang RuoLing are on good terms. If not, it will certainly be interesting. At that time, it’s improbable for Tang RuoLing to let his son partic.i.p.ate in the Huis.h.i.+, which will result in a three (3) – year holdup. In three (3) years, Sun CongRui may once again use the same means to stop Tang RuoLing. The Emperor acted this way to ease Tang RuoLing’s mind, and to warn Sun CongRui not to cause any trouble.”

Zheng ShaoFeng looked at Tian Qi in awe “How do you know that Sun DaRen and Tang DaRen‘s relations.h.i.+p is bad? My dad told me to become aware of capable individuals. It seems… You’re indeed smart…”

“You overpraise, you overpraise. You are simply too stupid.”

Zheng ShaoFeng listlessly scratched his head “What can I do? I was born stupid.”

Tian Qi was somewhat softhearted and tried to console him “It doesn’t matter if you’re stupid. I heard Sun CongRui is a cautious man. His exam questions won’t be too difficult. As long as you are diligent in your studies, you have a better chance to pa.s.s the test. Anyway, it is just an imperial examination, it shouldn’t be too difficult.”

As they talked and talked, Tian Qi felt that she unconsciously spoke quite a lot, and she shouldn’t have divulged so much to Zheng ShaoFeng. Without any better option, she urged him that he must never mention what they spoke of to other people. Zheng ShaoFeng had to promise again and again on his ancestors’ spirits that he will safeguard this secret, only then was he allowed to leave.

That evening, Zheng ShouFu and Sun CiFu both spoke to their sons about the same individual.

ShouFu = First a.s.sistant 
CiFu = Second a.s.sistant

Zheng ShouFu listened to his son’s theory and he was so startled his chin nearly fell off. “This is supposedly what you, yourself, understood?”

Zheng ShaoFeng proudly nodded “Yes, a.”

“It is a fart,” Zheng ShouFu slapped his son and shouted “next a Big Dipper will come out of your head. Even I was unable to figure this one out! Speak. In the end, who did you hear this from?”

Zheng ShaoFeng was covering his head with his hand and said “He wouldn’t let me say.”

Zheng ShouFu breathed a sigh of relief and slowly stated “I will also let go of this. This person is good so you may have dealings with him. I just don’t know what his purpose is. Do you know him well enough? Don’t get used by him.”

Zheng ShaoFeng nodded briefly “Rest a.s.sured, I’m aware.” He thought about Tian Qi’s “purpose” and suddenly felt it was quite unfortunate. From the beginning until now he was firmly convinced Tian Qi was Ji Zheng’s small rabbit (kept man). Such interesting and witty person, foolishly pure and all belonging to Ji Zheng. Truly a fresh flower in……poked in……

a bunch of flowers poked in a pile of manure is the saying he didn’t finish. As in TQ is too good for JZ

Zheng ShaoFeng drummed his fingers on the table for a while, and finally gave up. He couldn’t shamelessly say “cow dung”.

On the other side, at the Sun manor, Sun CiFu asked one more time about Ning w.a.n.gYe‘s male partner. He felt that matters were not that simple. He shouldn’t have listened to his son’s words said in a moment of anger, then wrote that memorial for the Emperor. The result was that he picked a quarrel.

This was also the first time he heard of the term “kept man” (male partner).

Tian Qi?!

Wasn’t that the small eunuch at the front of the imperial family? How could he have possibly been close with Ningw.a.n.g and even implicate him? Even more, a kept man?

When all was said and done, this was truly nonsense. It was not surprising the Emperor was dissatisfied.

Asking after this “Tian Qi”‘s appearance, sure enough, it was the Tian Qi working in the Imperial Palace. Sun CongRui’s personality was straightforward. He slapped his desk and chewed out his son until he had was satisfied.

Sun Fan was unable to accept it, “Even if there is nothing between him and Ning w.a.n.g, it doesn’t matter. As a man working at the top of the Imperial Palace, even though very bossy, such an eunuch is unlikely to stay by the Emperor’s side for a long time.”

Sun CongRui immediately grabbed the empty teacup off the table and threw it at Sun Fan. Sun Fan did not dare to dodge, but fortunately the teacup deviated from its course and hit the door frame and turned into tiny fragments. Sun Fan was scared into trembling at the sound of the cup breaking into pieces.

“Whether he stays by the Emperor’s side or not, how does that concern you and me?! Don’t ever utter such words again. How many times have I warned you that you need to behave yourself and be cautious, be polite and modest, and not speak before you think? You are fond of moving things upside down, speculating, you still thing you’re being reasonable? Although the eunuch may not go up on the surface, but he stayed by the Emperor’s side for a long time. If you put forward a slanderous report (false charge), you won’t be able to mend your reputation for several years. You don’t care you put yourself in danger, you are concerned with whether he keeps his job or not. You really have a big heart. You should be short of money.”

Sun Fan lowered his head, “Father needing to teach me to behave, son is wrong and now has learned. Son is determined to not repeat this crime a second time. Son doesn’t dare to…”

Sun CongRui waved his hand, “This time’s affair, the Emperor has already settled. Thus everything has been exposed.”

Sun Fan let go of his intention and tried to come around. He had second thoughts about this. As Tian Qi’s arrogant face came to his mind, he felt unconvinced.

Sun CongRui warned Sun Fan several times and advised him again. As Sun Fan nodded at each of his requests, Sun CongRui’s face gradually eased. Talking with his son, he unexpectedly asked, “The first time you met this Tian Qi, did you feel he looked familiar in some way?”

“I haven’t. Why is father asking this question?” Sun Fan felt this was odd.

“It’s not important. I just feel that I have seen his eyebrows and his eyes – his appearance – somewhere before, they appear familiar.” Sun CongRui frowned as he tried to recall his past. After searching a few times, he came up empty-handed.

“There are so many people in the whole world, and a few of them resemble one another. He may look like a certain individual, can’t say for sure whether he does or not. There is no need for father to be worried about such a trivial thing.”

Sun CongRui chose to drop the matter, nodded, and then he sighed again.