"In his Baccha.n.a.lian revels and fits of fury, he has broken and destroyed the furniture until now scarcely a piece remains. Sometimes, after an attack of delirium tremens, he endeavors to reform, and works steadily for two or three months. But then he is again overcome, and drinks worse than ever. His wife has gradually lost all hope, and seems to give up and let everything go. I fear she does not try to make home comfortable and pleasant to him, when he is himself. Everything is filthy in the extreme. It is only as a matter of stern duty that I can sit down in the house.
"For a day or two Jones has been sick, but he drinks all the time, he is awake; and I fear he will be wild to-night. It makes me sick at heart to think of him. He has some n.o.ble traits; but rum, _rum_, has changed him from a kind husband and a tender father into a creature worse than a brute."
_Tuesday, July 7th._
About midnight a messenger came for the Doctor to hasten to Jones. The watchers could do nothing with him. He raved and swore that devils were at the foot of the bed, waiting to catch his soul, and carry it to h.e.l.l.
Frank went at once and did not return until near daylight. At breakfast, he relieved my anxiety for the sick child, by saying, she had been removed to a room in the other part of the house, and was now much better. But Thomas, he said, had pa.s.sed a dreadful night. He had seemed to suffer the torments of the lost. He enumerated his sins from his childhood, disobedience to his parents, Sabbath breaking, profanity, intemperance, and almost every form of iniquity. These came up to his remembrance with the distinctness of the judgment. Then he told how he had turned from the Saviour, refused His offers of mercy, quenched the Spirit"s influence, ruined his own soul, and the souls of his wife and children, _all_, ALL _for_ RUM!!
This he screamed out; and when those around tried to soothe him, he said that he would scream so loud that every drunkard in town could hear. "If ten thousand devils pursue me," shrieked the insane man, "I will warn all to beware of RUM!!"
His attendants listened in wonder, and even Frank was astonished, as he had never heard him talk in this way before. Nor could he understand it until this morning, when Mrs. Jones told him that they had been to hear the new minister preach; and it appears their consciences had been aroused by his faithful presentation of truth.
_Afternoon._
As Frank would not consent to my visiting little Susan, I contented myself with making her some nice porridge which Ann carried to her. My husband came in soon after, and told me two men could not hold Thomas in bed; and they had been obliged to confine his arms. He knows no one but his physician; and this afternoon appealed to him in a hoa.r.s.e whisper, "take them off," pointing to the men who stood at the side of the bed.
"Oh, hide me! _Hide me!_ they tear my soul!"
The Doctor motioned them out of sight, and tried to soothe him.
"Thomas," said he in a calm voice, "do you remember when you and I went to the Sabbath school?"
"Yes, oh _yes_!" gasped the poor fellow.
"Where did Mr. Goodrich tell us to flee for safety?" Thomas looked up eagerly, but made no reply.
"He told us to go to Christ. He would save us from all our enemies."
"If he would but take me; but oh, he wont; _he wont_! I"ve been too wicked ever to expect that," and hiding his head under the clothes, he cried aloud. Frank succeeded in persuading him to take some medicine, which the attendants could not do, because he thought they meant to poison him. He was calmer before Frank left.
_Thursday, July 9th._
Last evening, my dear husband hurried through his calls, and took Mr.
Munroe with him to see poor Thomas. He found him so exhausted by the violence of his fits, that, unless soon relieved, he cannot live long.
The agony of his mind makes him much worse than ever before. When they went in, he had fallen asleep, and they sat down quietly to wait until he awoke. Frank says, as he sat by the bed and looked at the miserable man, so haggard and ghastly, he prayed that G.o.d would have mercy upon his soul, even at the eleventh hour.
When Jones awoke, he stared around him a moment, as if trying to remember where he was, while the Doctor quietly liberated his right hand, with which he immediately covered his face. After he had taken some gruel, he sighed, but would not speak.
Frank told him Mr. Munroe had come in as a friend to see him. He suddenly pulled away the clothes, and said, "No, he"ll mock me! He knows how wicked I am! The last time I went to meeting he told over all my sins. He knows I can"t be saved, and he"ll only mock me." Here the poor creature burst into loud crying.
Mr. Munroe moved nearer, and took Thomas"s hand in his; "My poor friend," said he, in a very gentle voice, "It would ill become me, a sinful creature as well as yourself, to make a mock at one for whom Christ died. I have come to remind you of his love, of his desire for your salvation. He has knocked at the door of your heart again, and again, and you have turned away from his pleading voice. Will you?--dare you turn from him now? When the Holy Spirit is striving with you, will you resist his gracious influence?"
He was interrupted by loud sobs, and Mrs. Jones, whom they had not perceived, hastened from the room, holding her ap.r.o.n to her face. Thomas had not noticed the interruption, but was looking so intently at Mr.
Munroe that the Doctor almost feared the excitement, and placed his fingers on the brawny wrist.
But our good pastor perceived the workings of the spirit, and hoped and prayed that peace and joy might take the place of the dark despair which was killing body and soul.
No one spoke, but still Thomas gazed. His whole mind was filled with wonder. At length, he gasped, rather than spoke, "I will, _I will_ receive Him as my Saviour, but oh, it is too late!"
The last words were spoken in such a tone of utter wretchedness and despair, that his hearers could not refrain from tears.
"Thomas," asked Mr. Munroe, "Do you remember the thief on the cross? Up to the moment of his conversion he had probably reviled his Lord. Take care then that you do not limit the power of the Almighty, whose voice of mercy saith "He will save to the uttermost all that come unto Him."
He also adds for your encouragement, "though your sins be as scarlet, they shall be white as snow; though they be red like crimson, they shall be as wool.""
The poor man looked from one to the other, as if exhausted by the dreadful conflict within him, and said in a broken voice, "you will not deceive me with hope, when G.o.d has left me to despair."
Frank said, "While there is life, there is mercy if you will believe;"
and not wishing to prolong the interview, they knelt in prayer. The poor wife came in and threw herself down at the foot of the bed. Mr. Munroe in a fervent manner commended them to G.o.d.
He prayed that from eternity they might look back upon this hour as the most blessed of their lives, as the hour when they had chosen Jesus for their Saviour, and heaven for their everlasting home. Before he arose from his knees, the poor humble penitent said, in a voice choking with tears, "Lord, I believe. Have mercy upon my guilty soul!" Mrs. Jones sobbed aloud.
From earth to heaven the tidings flew, Two guilty souls are born anew.
_Friday, July 10th._
This morning Doctor Frank has been to see Thomas. I waited with no little impatience for his return. He found his patient decidedly better, though very weak. He had but one fit during the night, and that much less severe in its character. He had a touching expression of humility which made him look like a different man. He has most clear views of the sinfulness of his own heart; and of the abounding grace of G.o.d in providing a Redeemer for one so vile.
Frank was much pleased with one expression he used; "I dare not hope that G.o.d has accepted me; but I feel willing to be in his hands. He knows what is best for me. I feel safe to trust him, and think when he sees how strong my desire is to do right, he will help me."
Oh, that Thomas may be able to withstand temptation, and to bring forth fruits meet for repentance. I hope Christians will encourage him and pray for him. I was grieved this morning to hear a professing Christian speak distrustfully of the change in poor Thomas, and say, "persons in delirium tremens, are often very pious, but when they recover, their goodness vanishes like the morning cloud, and early dew."
Surely it is infinite condescension in G.o.d to visit the abode of drunkenness and filth with the rich blessings of salvation; but who can doubt his ability, and willingness to do it?
_Monday, July 13th._
I have not been quite well for a day or two, and have only received permission to write a few lines. Frank blames himself for allowing me to do so much; but I have really done nothing which could injure my health.
The weather was very warm yesterday. I lay upon the bed the greater part of the day. Frank insisted upon staying from church to nurse me in the afternoon. He was obliged to visit his patients in the morning. It is quite sickly now in the town, especially among children. May G.o.d preserve our dear little Pauline!
After her return from church in the afternoon, madam Phebe came to my room to make inquiries about my health.
"Well, Phebe," I asked, "Did you enjoy the sermon?"
"Oh, yes, missus, ole Phebe hab blessed time. Ma.s.s"r Munroe quite undo hisself dis yer day."
"_Out do_ you mean," said I laughingly.
"Laws missus! dere aint no kinder difference. He go long farder in the broad road dan I eber heard him afore. I "spects, I"se can stand de meanin if I"se don"t use de right words."
"What was the text?"
"Dere now, I"se can"t jist tink ob de text all in a minit. It has popped right off all in a suddent, but "twas a blessed un, all bout G.o.d."
"Well, Phebe, if you can"t remember the text, you can tell me about the sermon,--it pleased you so much."
"Oh, yes, missus, pleased me berry much, powerful good discoors dat ar.