Denpa Onna to Seishun Otoko

Baseball in the morning, stargaze in the night.

In days like these, daytime was the most boring.

Erio"s working at Tamura Shop. Meme-san is working, kind of. Ryuushi-san"s working hard for her club. They may not all be busy, but they"re all doing something.

The only free and bored soul was me.

I was the only person home when noon arrived. Since morning I lay on the bed, eyes shut, and waited for the sleep that never came; I sighed. Half-conscious, I picked up the reference book with heavy eyes. After a few pages, I would put it down and shut my eyes again. Repeating that, two hours pa.s.sed.

No one was home, and since it"s been so hot, my instinct overcame me. Letting what could be called the peak of civilization, the AC, run, I sealed the room up. Because of the light shooting in from outside, I closed the blinds on the window as well. Strange, considering I used the AC all the time back home.

"Ughh~" In the first three minutes, only a tepid, mouldy air came out of the machine. After a while, a cool atmosphere capable of keeping the room comfy was established. "The appliance you want to marry the most in summer" — the t.i.tle was once again unchallenged. A fan might be a far second. During the winter, the kotestu would be a tough rival.[1]

Now, I can ignore the stickiness on my skin. Contented, I plopped back down on the bed.

What came next replaced this irksome heat.

Time: when I"m doing nothing.

“Sigh~” I covered my face with the book, lamenting on how useless I was.

I felt my Youth-points evaporate every time when I fell asleep doing nothing. I"m not in a club: during time such as summer when school isn"t in session, the chance of me interacting with another person is greatly reduced.

Youth-point is a thing only nourishable with another human being. I mean, it"s too late, though, to say this anyway.

Even if I wanted to go out with one of my cla.s.smates, I just couldn"t find the motivation — must be because I don"t know them long enough. Being a transfer student is kind of awkward, like being an outsider.

The only person left I know is Maekawa-san, but we"re not so chummy that I can just ask her out on a whim. She"s a girl too, and much haughtier than Ryuushi-san. Is it her hobby, or her height? Or maybe the pressure from her dad? Furthermore, she might pa.s.s out twice being outside in this sun.

Plus, I don"t think she"s doing nothing. She might be working too. Didn"t she say she wanted a motorcycle license? Because of that Onee-chan in a yukata?

“So it"s just me?” Someone with nothing to do.

Is freedom merely being unconfined for twenty-four hours? Can’t believe I thought about taking a nap when I"m forced to do stupid things with the others.

I heard the faint noise of some people; but it disappeared, as though the AC had snared it away.

Trapped in this room, with nowhere else to go, were the cries of cicada and the whirling of the AC.

“...Ugah~”

Just exactly how the h.e.l.l did I manage to stay in my room for the entire summer last year?

As I recalled, it felt more like I was looking into another person"s private life.

I decided to head out for lunch, so I grabbed my phone and wallet. “Uwah...”

The sun cutting into the door instantly dulled my resolve. Nifuram. I tipped forward and almost fell backward. The linguistic may be vague, but do try to understand this on a metaphysical level. I almost scurried back home.[2]

What if AC"s had legs? Then it"d be mobile and stuff. Or maybe everything should just come into my room instead! These selfish thoughts hovered in my head as I considered a way to counter this heat.

“Of course!” I just have to carry the AC! Hot d.a.m.n, Mako-kun"s a genius!

After the idiotic thoughts sublimed, I walked toward the bicycle. The terrifying heat seemed able to burn off even the nutrient in the head, causing thoughts to become incredibly one-dimensional. I might just judge a book by its cover and start seeking Erio"s affection. This might be a complete meltdown.

Slowly dragging the bike out, I rode forward shakily. Sweat spewing from the neck, and the sun pressing down heavily, I wondered maybe I was possessed by something.

Concerned that the bike"s frame might melt, I started wandering. Where should I go? I don"t want to go to the station, neither do I want to explore the local cuisine.

I hate to say this, but Meme-san"s food is just to my taste. “It"s love! Lovey Love, together Love, beach love!” Shame about her how she speaks, really.

So that leaves one choice… “Let"s go to the Tamura Shop.” And I could check on Erio too.

Though it"s only been three days since I last went. Erio seems to be doing fine these days, and Tamura Obaa-san"s recovered enough that she could go into the store, so even Meme-san"s relaxed.

I didn"t have to change route — maybe I subconsciously wanted to go there? With that in mind, I sped up slightly. Rather than staying longer in this heat, I wanted to go into that cave-like house. My brain demanded, and I agreed.

“Hm?”

As I pa.s.sed between the residence, I saw a familiar face; I braked and looked back.

She appeared to have noticed too; the sun hit the slightly crooked grin.

“Yo, transfer student.”

It"s Maekawa-san. With a black parasol in hand, she walked forward. Something"s off about that attire. Only, Maekawa-san"s normal outfit only counts when we"re talking about costumes.

She wore blue jeans and a blouse, a getup perfect for walking to a nearby store; however, both pieces seemed too small, as much of her skin showed.

“Where are you heading?”

“I wanted to grab a bite somewhere. You?”

“On my way home after an errand. Unfortunately, one of my family member stole my bike.”

With that explanation, she mumbled something about lunch. The umbrella cast a light shade on her face. I felt obligated to stay before she came to a conclusion; despite of the heat beating down on my brow, I endured in the middle of the street. Not a single car pa.s.sed. Maybe people would melt if they walked on the road, I thought.

Finally, light returned to Maekawa-san"s face.

“That"s it. Why don"t we go to my place? I"ll make you lunch.”

“Eh?” Maekawa-san"s house? Girl House? It"s hard to deny that I didn"t want to pounce at the invitation. I could feel the Youth-points. I"m going to a girl"s house! And during a vacation!

Maekawa-san, on the other hand, didn"t seem bothered; she pointed at the basket on my bicycle.

“So, can I get a ride in this basket?”

“...Hah?”

“If Touwa likes it so much, it must be pretty darn good.”

Hmhm, she nodded smugly. Maekawa-san, lanky as she was, clung onto the bike like a spider and stuffed her lower half into the basket. “Wow, it"s tight.”

She grudgingly accepted the condition and reported to me. I don"t need to hear this. And, once again, the dream of riding double drifted further and further away from me. I expected no less from this alien-protected town that only allow its girls to do this E.T style riding… Maybe the aliens are protecting them because they like these girls?

“Well, I"m in ya hands.” Maekawa-san spun her parasol and commanded joyously. And what can I do? I scratched my burning scalp, but seeing her like that, my doubt vanished.

She"s willing to spend her day-off with me: she can sit however she wants.

It"s a weekday too, so Maekawa Dad must be working.

Once again I pedalled onward. Compare to Erio, Maekawa-san was comparatively lighter.

“How are you feeling?”

“Like a shipped-off cow in a cart.”

“I bet you do.”

Should I pretend I"m the young Elliot? Like, "Here we go~! Fly~!"

Maekawa-san lives in the corner of the residential district. It"s newly constructed and close to the shopping district.

“Let me out~” I held Maekawa-san"s flailing arms and pulled her out of the basket. “My b.u.t.t hurts.” Hands rubbing her rump, she hopped toward the entrance.

Maekawa-san checked if the slide door was locked first before reaching for her key. “Are they picking up new stocks? Oh, did I ever mention my parents run a bar?”

“It"s a bit hazy but I think you did.”

We chatted while moving in; the bike was parked in front of the storage in the yard. The current weather indicated I shouldn"t worry about a surprise downpour. In fact, I kind of wanted to pray for some rain to cool this town down.

Maekawa-san opened the door and went in first; I trailed behind. “Welcome~” As though following a certain rule, she greeted before leading me into the living room.

“One sec, I"m going to prepare.”

“Hm.” Prepare? Oh, lunch? Isn"t it a little shameless to have her make lunch for me? Pretty hypocritical considering my stomach growled as I pondered; hence I decided to ignore that thought.

Sitting in the living room and enjoying the air conditioner — not many things could beat this.

After about two minutes pa.s.sed.

Wearing a pink T-shirt and a blue camo skirt, Maekawa-san appeared with a doughnut in hand. Then she made a strange sound of "Nom, nom nom." before eating the doughnut.

“…?”

“Somebody said that I didn"t need to get a new haircut, so I wanted to try this once.”

“???” I searched in my shallow knowledge what this is referring to… I don"t get it.[3] “Wow, you don"t read manga, do you? Not very compet.i.tive, transfer student.”

“Well, I picked a few up recently.” It"s helpful when I"m talking with guys too.

She finished the doughnut and disappeared quickly. Um… Was that a cosplay? From the sound of it she was playing a manga character, but I thought she graduated from that already?

Looking down, I lost my thought in the garden projected in the window. “...” Having handmade lunch by a cla.s.smate. Typically, that"d be +2, but since now I"ve had all three meals made by Maekawa-san, I"ll throw in an extra +3 rating. Like so, I pondered about things unrelated to the garden.

Just then, two Niwa-kun"s (丹羽) appeared in the garden (にわ)… As I came up with something Ryuushi-san would, that "thing" leapt out from beneath. I jolted away from the window, almost falling back, "Uwah!". Actually, I only did half of both actions described, merely ducking down a little.

Having a window between us was rea.s.suring, but I actually thought it was a ma.s.s of white snakes.

Something crawled out into the garden. As though the law of nature, the pale object appeared.

Strange. It"s so nice in here, but I"m about to pa.s.s out.

Why the h.e.l.l is she here?

The oh-so-sneaky Hoshimiya Yashiro was trying to pilfer the ripened tomatoes in the Maekawas’ garden. Still wearing the things Meme-san gifted, she did not forget to don the helmet. Such a shady character. After seeing her again since we parted at the school"s storage, I was at ease knowing that she"s fine. On the other hand, I also wondered why she"s still in town.

It"s a bit wasteful, but I opened the gla.s.s screen.

“Oi.” You"re quite sneaky for a thief, but are you a critter? Or a farm burglar?

“Eave teleportation!”

She immediately shouted the name of an almost-ability. She appeared to recognize my voice and didn"t look surprised.

“Hm-hm-hm, I- already- knew- you- would— Sorry, I can"t do this any more, my throat hurts.”

“Could you not play pretend when you"re not feeling well? And why did you break into another person"s house again?! You"re also a tomato thief now!”

“T-this… Is a tomahto.”

“I don"t care how you say it! That’s it: you have to go home now!”

“What made you think I can if I"m here? Why don"t you try making a rocket that can send me to Mars in a day, huh?”

...What the h.e.l.l? Not to be a jerk, but she"s kind of being a nuisance now; however, if she were to starve to death here, it would leave a pretty terrible décor in Maekawa-san"s house.

“Alright, fine. You, stay right there.”

Even I question why I do the things I do, but I just can"t stand ignoring people I know. Leaving the living room, I easily arrived to the kitchen; it wasn"t a particularly difficult house to navigate, after all.

“Hm? Transfer student, did hunger get to you? Couldn"t you wait a bit?”

Stirring something in the frying pan, Maekawa-san looked back. With her slender figure and the ap.r.o.n, she left a distinct impression of "a capable girl." She wore it so well I almost wanted to change my impression of her.

Basically, her ap.r.o.n form was in my strike zone.

“Um, would you mind I take some tomatoes?” Despite my thumping heart, I requested with a straight face.

“Hm?” Maekawa-san tilted her head confusedly at my request.

“Uhh, there"s a starving cat in your garden asking for some tomatoes.”

“Oh… It"s okay, I guess. I thought maybe you"re becoming Ryuushi or something.”

Maekawa-san handed me two tomatoes. I wanted to pay, but she just laughed it off, "quit joking around." Hmm, she"s indeed quite a respectable lady. Too bad she"s made of paper Mache.

After thanking her, I returned to the living room. “Here.” I handed the tomatoes to Yashiro. It"s still a loss to the Maekawa household, but it"s probably better than having them stolen.

Yashiro took her helmet off, revealing her face before accepting the red fruits. On her face was slight bemus.e.m.e.nt, like the type when you are least expecting kindness.

If she could take off that helmet more often, then people would definitely be friendlier toward her.

Oh~ But her superpower would explode, wouldn"t it? I won"t forget to add that (lol) after the message.

Yashiro stared intently at the tomatoes; her head bowed deeply.

“Thank you, dream.”

“How about thanking someone more specific?”

Is it really that unreal for me to be nice?

“Dung dung dung ~ dung! Danger evasion UP! Makoto"s HP increased by five.”

“And none of that stupid game, please.”

Just leave me out of it! Is what I really meant.

Yashiro bit into the tomato. “Uwee~” Her cheek twitched from the sourness; she quickly finished the two tomatoes without stopping. It made me think that when her ident.i.ty is revealed, her hunger increases — could that be her real power?

...Well, it is true that whatever you eat becomes nutrient. Anyone could tell you as much, but it"s quite a mystery to wonder about if that common knowledge was to be erased.

Most organisms maintain life by "ingestion." Perhaps, to aliens of a different biology in a planet faraway, it could be seen as a form of super power.

But forget that: seeing Yashiro finish, I worried she would ask for another one. “If you"re done, get out of here already!” I ordered the intruder.

Yashiro scoffed and put her helmet back on.

“I will see this as a return of favour. Remember to thank me later.”

“Oh yes, I am truly honoured.” I didn"t even feel appreciated. It"s rare when you don"t feel rewarded helping someone.

With cheeky laughter, Yashiro left.

Perhaps instead of recovered, she had her brain melted in this heat.

Still, what"s the deal with her? I"ve always thought she"s wherever me and Erio are.

I shut the screen and ended the wasting of AC. I sat down in front of the table, anxious and expectant, waiting for Maekawa-san"s handmade meal.

“Here we are.”

Holding a plate with both hands, Maekawa-san and the smell of soy sauce entered the room. Even better was the ap.r.o.n that hung from her still. Excited, I involuntarily sat upright.

“Was that enough for the cat?”

“Yep, it was.”

“Awesome. Alright, go ahead.” The item in the plate was stir-fired Udon.

“Ohoh~”

“I wanted to make fried rice, but I didn"t have the ingredients for that.”

She put the obviously larger portion in front of me.

I was also able to get a gla.s.s of barely tea. Dried from the activity outside earlier, my throat greedily thirsted for water; I downed half the gla.s.s in one go. With the heat stolen, my innards shrunk.

They twitched with the trickling fluid. I will see this as a demand for solid food. I"m already on it~ I put my hands together and faced Maekawa-san.

“Well, I"m digging in.”

“Yep, go ahead.” She hurried me like a mom.

I picked up the chopsticks and started slurping the noodles.

“How"s the taste?”

“Hmm… This rich… Whatdya call it? The cooking manga I read before called it something.”

There"s a pile of cooking manga in Meme-san"s room, so I borrowed some when I had time.

“Uh, just something normal is fine.”

“Oh, okay. Then in that case, it"s delicious — it’s amazing.”

My comment seemed to have a.s.sured Maekawa-san; she smiled. Then, she began picking up her own noodle too.

Hm… “So, there’s really nothing else you called me here for, huh?”

“Yep. I guess you could call having lunch together something though, right?”

“Yeah.” Well, that’s not bad either.

I still thought that my impression earlier was too mundane — Ryuushi-san would definitely be ticked off by it. She’s always been flexible. I don’t really know what that word means though.

“Now I get why Hanazawa-san wanted to marry into your family.”

“Cough!”

Maekawa-san spat out the udon in her mouth; with force that could shoot stuff out of her nose, she struggled. “Uh… You, doing alright?”

The moment I asked, she shot me a begrudging look.

For Maekawa-san to be shaken over something other than her height, I think I just witnessed a rare event.

…But did I even say anything that shocking?

After we’re both satiated with the noodles, Maekawa-san made a proposal:

“Wanna play some games? Only got some old stuff though.”

“Oh, you play video games too, Maekawa-san?”

“A lot, too, before I got this tall. At the time, I had a… Hm, nothing.”

She just left it as is. “Well, anyway, let’s go.” Maekawa-san got up and shut off the AC in the living room. She’s keeping a secret, but knowing that it’s got nothing to do with me, I got up without questioning. Onto the second floor, we officially enter the domain of Maekawa-san’s room.

“…Hmm.”

I didn’t expect it to be a girly room, but there wasn’t even a thing to surprise me in there.

In the room were wooden furniture of the same tone, and a few souvenir figures placed on the shelves; on her desk rested her bag and books, and not a single item related to cosplay was seen.

A plain room contradictory to the usual biology of Maekawa-san. It wasn"t until I saw the sweetfish costume laying on her bed was I able to sigh in relief.

“The closet in there is the door to your wildest dream. Want to take a look?”

“No thanks.”

I had a feeling she’d make me try them. She will most likely be more aggressive than a store clerk.

“Um… Around here… There it is.”

Dusty and its colour yellowed, the gaming console Maekawa-san pulled out was indeed ancient. It must have been top-notch years ago: I remember seeing it on TV long ago.

She laid a few cartridges, their finishing also faded, onto the carpet.

In the end, we agreed to play the racing game. I chose to play as the walking mushroom, and Maekawa-san the green dinosaur. Neither of us picked the human protagonists.[4]

Sitting from a distance away, we stared at the TV.

When it’s Maekawa-san, I become less conscious with the idea of ‘being alone with another girl.”

Was it due to seeing her cosplay all the time?

We selected the track and began racing.

“…You seem like you’re quick to give up, transfer student.”

I failed and started last; Maekawa-san graciously took the spot of first.

“Eh? What do you mean?”

I don’t really know how to play, having only tried a little at my friend’s place. I chased the back of seventh place. Did she mean I should give up on trying to win the game?

“Well, you’re the type that usually gives up beforehand, so I thought that that must be the case.”

Since I’m in last place, the items would usually be good… Until I got a banana peel.

How fortunate.

“You think? There are things I wouldn’t give up too, though.”

Like Youth-points and such. As well as first place, for this game. I hit sixth place.

“For instance, you’ve already given up on ever hitting Hanazawa’s pitches.”

“Oh~ that. Yeah. Well, isn’t it too much to ask, expecting an amateur to hit those throws?”

A football landed on the ground in my mind; I tried to send it flying, but end up falling on the ground.

“It"s gonna be difficult to go to the festival if we lose… You’ve heard, right? Whoever wins the last games gets to host the event.”

“Yeah, I heard from Ryuushi-san.”

“Don’t you want to go with her or Touwa?”

“Ah… Well, Erio aside, yeah, it certainly would be nice. What about you, Maekawa-san?”

“I have to help out at the booth. And if we lose next week, I guess I will watch the firework from my yard.”

Oh, it’s next week? But, we’re going to lose anyway, right? Since they have an actual player there.

“I digress, but you might be surprised to hear that I could easily let go of things.”

Maekawa-san successfully led the race. Her words and rank don’t match — was she mocking me? I glanced at her screen, remembering that I just have to drift through corners. What’s the b.u.t.ton again?

“I’m already through hiding my height. Not much you can do when you’re already 179.9 cm tall.”

“Dontcha think you’ve been awfully persistent with that number?” And you sound a little rude too.

“But I did accept the fact that I’m tall.”

Maekawa-san grimaced, twisting her controller like an actual car. That would probably result in the vehicle ramming into the wall in real life.

In the virtual world, she kept first despite having a less-than-smooth path.

“To give up is to approve of your opponent, so I don’t think it’s all bad.”

“That’s not a bad way to make friends.”

My rank rose to fifth. We reached a tunnel.

“Only, recently.”

“Recently?”

“I should be giving up, but it"s getting harder.”

“Hm?”

I tried to remember the shortcut, only to fail miserably and ended up in last place; Maekawa-san, too, tried to challenge the same route and dropped down to seventh.

“I"m wondering, "how could this be?!", y"know, transfer student?”

“Ah. Like losing your lead because you were too stubborn.”

“I guess I"m in no place to poke fun of anyone.”

“Yeah. You’ll end up last if I catch up.”

So ended the first lap. With two more to go, I climbed to fifth while Maekawa-san forth.

“Are you having fun, transfer student?”

“Yeah, I am.”

I’d already gotten used to the track; my hands, too, adapted to the control.

“Good. Then, I won’t give up either.”

“It"s still the first lap though: you don’t have to be so pessimistic.”

I saw that bitter grin again from the corner of my eyes.

“Yeah, I guess… My point is, some things are just hard to give up.”

“Oh… I’m still not sure what you’re getting at though.”

It’d a zero if she was giving me a test.

“The right answer is never so easily understood. Like a modern j.a.panese exam.”

“Huh…”

I glossed over, ‘giving up’ on trying to understand… Oh, I see. Her a.s.sessment for my personality seemed accurate.

But I think I also wanted to ignore that because I didn’t want to disturb the atmosphere we have playing games.

We finished second lap — I took over Maekawa-san’s avatar.

“So, I’m still transfer student, huh.”

“Hm?”

“Oh, uh, my name, that is. I think we’re near the expiration date for that name.”

I successfully reached second on the last lap; Maekawa-san shifted between fourth and fifth.

The AC moaned on the side.

“I’ve called you that since we met. Isn’t it a little weird to change now?”

“Why’s that?”

“No reason. I have pride too, you know.”

For a long while, the room filled with only clicks of the controllers.

The voices of human only appeared alongside the small victory poses, at the end of the games, in the form of ‘yay!’ or ‘tch.’

Despite it being silent, it was an appeasing atmosphere.

After about an hour, as I got bored playing normally and was driving backward on the tracks, Maekawa-san suddenly opened her mouth:

“Oh yeah. I got a little question.”

“Hm?”

“As a sniffer, do you like Touwa or Ryuushi’s smell better?”

“Gahh!”

As she prefaced, this irrelevant question jabbed deeply between my ribs.

Obviously, this was an indirect abuse from Meme-san.

Was this an act of vengeance for earlier, Maekawa-san?

The green dinosaur easily surpa.s.sed the idle mushroom.

When it was about evening, I decided to leave the Maekawa household.

“You wanna to have dinner here too?”

“No, no. That’s too much. Besides, I think my aunt’s cooking… Probably.”

The kitchen’s been too hot lately, so she’s been looking for excuses to stay away from there.

Meme-san seemed to also find ways out of the town’s annual drain cleaning. That’s on the same level as a kid running away from cram school.

She might never lose that spirit even when she hit Tamura Obaa-san’s age. In a way, maybe being able to see like a child makes her an excellent teacher.

“Alright. Then, do say hi to Meme-san and Touwa for me.”

“You should do the same for me to your parents too… That"s not an issue, right?”

“Actually, I’ve been thinking about introducing you to my dad.”

“Please, anything but that.” My face will end up catching a ball.

“Ahaha, it’s just a joke. And, uh~”

Ahem! Maekawa-san coughed. What followed was rare for Maekawa-san — she looked down, almost bashful.

“Can I, invite you again sometimes? …Kiwa-kun.”

“Only if you don’t call me that. What about Ryuushi-san or Erio?”

“Ah~ Nah… I only got two controllers, you see.”

“…? Hm, I guess, but… Hmm~?”

“Don’t think too much about that, got it? Basically, I’m just glad that someone said my food was good.”

“Oh~ I see.”

She went on about this controller thing, but I somehow accepted her explanation. This was the first time in a long while since I complimented that she could be a model. I’ll treasure this moment.

“Then, bye.”

“Hm. I will see you tomorrow.”

Let’s meet again tomorrow, when you’re in your fish form.

I bid farewell to Maekawa-san, who waved her hand, and stepped onto the pedals.

Since the time was right, I’ll go pick Erio up too.

The sky held onto the light still, casting a golden hue across town. No longer stinging, the sun had this softness, as though making a compromise.

“Haah.”

Feeling overly fulfilled, I gradually let out the excess.

Even with no comprehension of what happened, I felt satisfied.

I could call it an uneventful day: I think it wasn’t spent any differently than just cosying up in my room.

Nothing in particular happened when I went to Maekawa-san’s house.

But the way I spent the time there couldn’t be any more interesting.

In a day where nothing happened, where nothing was added — it is amazing to think how it was a one-eighty from the regular days.

Since times long ago, human interaction has always been the manifestation of mystery.

I rung the bell twice meaninglessly — I was that excited.

Yet, it was a suspiciously normal day in a town like this.

I once again realized that If she doesn’t do weird cosplays, she’d be a tall and sensible beauty.

“In any case.” It was a great day. No one could say otherwise.

“Dung dung dung~ dung, Youth-points UP, 3 points!”