The takeaway here is that you want to plan your ask for an appropriate point in the conversation. Sometimes, when youare simply trying to build out your donor base or increase your annual dollars raised, you can make the solicitation on the first call. Sometimes, though, the timeline is longer.
Where.
Where is the right place to ask someone for money? Ideally, it is a combination of where the donor feels comfortable and a setting and ambiance that is conducive to having an in-depth conversation. In practice, it is often more so the former and hopefully at least a little bit the latter.
Again, this will be an exercise in knowing your donor and knowing yourself. Itas usually best to let the donor choose the venue to have the conversation (this is true of your other types of visits, too, by the way).
Remember, you want your prospect in his or her comfort zone when asking for money. And his or her comfort zone may or may not be conducive to having that candid, uncomfortable talk about giving. How you hold a conversation in a closed-door office will be different from how you hold a conversation in an open-s.p.a.ced floor. You will need to have conversations in offices, over meals, over coffee, over drinks, while walking down the street, in elevators and lobbies, in crowded noisy places and quiet places, at 7 a.m., at 9 p.m., and for any amount of time ranging from less than five minutes to more than three hours.
You will need to get comfortable having gift conversations in all of these settings. Here, youall need to be flexible in your planning. If you were hoping for 30 minutes and the donor tells you up front that you have 15, well, you have 15 minutes to make the ask. You have to accept the fact that youare at the mercy of the prospectas schedule and that your pitch has to adapt accordingly.
How Much?
Whether itas $100 or $1,000,000, you need to have a dollar amount in mind when you go into the conversation. I know it sounds obvious, but itas easy to leave the amount open. Donat. You need to offer specific numbers for the donor to consider. Sometimes, a range is appropriate, but you should aim for specific figures whenever possible.
Donorsa impressions of a abiga gift can sometimes be, to your organizationas standards, quite small. The reverse is also true (and I definitely celebrate and love those donors). It is best not to leave it to chance; place an actual number in their head. If youare asking them simply to renew their previous level of support, or to double it, I would still say the numbers out loud. The truth is that quite often, donors simply donat commit to memory how much theyave pledged or given to your organization in the past, and sometimes they cannot remember when they last made a gift. This is true of donors of all levels. Iam not making this up when I say that prospects of mine who have pledged $50,000 canat remember how much they agreed to give. So it is important that you have an ask amount in mind and that you say it out loud in conversation (and then follow up in writing to reconfirm the amount).
Who.
Remember: Sometimes, the frontline fundraiser is NOT actually the best person to make the ask. Often enough, it will be the fundraiser, but there are a plethora of other individuals that represent your organization that should also be considered for the actual solicitation. Those individuals can include the executive director (or equivalent), board members, or volunteers. Which other individuals are at your disposal will depend on the type of work that your organization does. Be creative in thinking about whoas best to make the ask. Granted, your frontline fundraisers are the default and are the best practiced in making the solicitation, but also keep in mind that sometimes donors donat respond to fundraisers very well. Or that sometimes they feel ent.i.tled to a visit from the executive director.2 Youall have to be the one to decide who should be making the ask. Again, most of the time, it is the frontline fundraiser, but once in a while the role falls to someone else.
Hereas a tip: Make sure that if someone else is making the ask, they have been vetted and coached by you.
Pulling the Trigger: Tips and Tricks.
And so you arrive at the actual moment of the actual ask. Youave secured the appointment, your plan is to solicit, and youave gotten through all the small talk and other topics in conversation that you wanted to cover. There is nothing left to do but make the ask, to put it out there in the open, and solicit that prospect for money.
While every fundraiser will develop his or her own style and approach, here are a few beginneras tips for that imminent moment, when youare about to pull the trigger.
__________.
2 Again, this will be especially true for major and megagifts.
End Every Sentence, in Your Mind (and ONLY in Your Mind) with ad.a.m.n Ita
A strange tip, to be sure, but thereas a very sound reason for it. One thing that tends to happen with speaking when people get nervous is that they upspeak. Upspeak is when a person begins ending every sentence as though it were a question. Itas really annoying to listen to and, more importantly, it makes one come off as nervous and weak, thus undermining the donoras confidence. Ending every sentence, again, only in your mind, with d.a.m.n it is a simple trick that helps to prevent that. Practice it! aIad really like you to consider a five year commitment of twenty-five thousand dollars, d.a.m.n it. That level of support would enable our inst.i.tution to make huge strides in helping to end gang violence in Hartford, d.a.m.n it.a Just be super, super careful not to let it slip out when youare actually speaking to your donor!
Speak Slowly.
When people get to the ask, they often want to get it over with as quickly as possible. Itas a fair enough desire; the ask is often the most nerve-racking part of the fundraising process. People want to get through it with all due speed. However, when you make the actual solicitation, you need to speak clearly and confidently. The confidently part can be achieved with the ending of every sentence with d.a.m.n it. The clearly part must come from practice in slowing yourself down. If you speak too fast, the prospect might not hear you, or worse, misunderstand you. A former colleague of mine once told me that he had meant to ask for $200,000 and, by accident, in a nervous fit, he blurted out the figure of $20,000. The donor said yes. To $20,000.
One good way to slow yourself is to check if youare breathing or not. I know it might sound silly, but when people get nervous, one of the first things they often do is hold their breath. Itas the fight-or-flight response kicking in.
Acting 101 again: In a way, fundraising is performance, and stage actors are taught to exaggerate. It is better to be speaking too slowly at this particular juncture in your interaction with your prospect than too quickly. Consciously slow yourself down. Ask yourselfa"if you can in that momenta"if you can hear and understand what youare saying. If you cannot, then chances are very good that the donor is also struggling to hear what you have to say.
Let the Silence Hang.
Silence is golden. After you make your ask, shut up. This rule is just as hard to follow, if not harder, than speaking slowly and avoiding upspeak. Really, though, remaining silent after you make the actual ask with an actual dollar sign is a key strategy. Think of silent time as athinking timea for your prospect. The prospect is thinking, considering what you have just proposed. As the amount goes up, the amount of thinking time might increase (although it might not). Staying silent can be excruciating, but remember that silence is not a sign that they are saying no. So donat interrupt. Let the prospect begin to visualize him or herself writing that check or signing that pledge form. You will have the urge to interrupt, apologize, clarify, or take it back. Donat do it.
Here are some things that colleagues or peers have reported doing while the silence lingers.
Making shopping lists Singing songs by favorite artists Making general observations about the prospect (for example, large gums, small teeth, hairy hands, or, when nervous, blows hair out of eyes) Thinking of the first three things to do at home Composing poetry Whatever it is that you need to do to prevent yourself from interjecting during this critical period, do it. Silence can go on for an uncomfortably long time. Sometimes itas a matter of seconds. Sometimes, it can last up to a minutea sometimes more. It will feel like an eternity. Let it.
Donat Make It Sound Weird.
Here is another odd tip, one that youall have to practice. But do practice it. The less weird you make the solicitation sound, whether itas an ask of $25 or $25,000, the less weird the donor will perceive it to be. You have to deliver your ask in such a way that you give the impression that donating a million dollars to your organization is the most natural thing in the world.
If you sound unsure, if you make the amount seem unnaturally high based on your delivery, youare doing yourself a disservice. If the delivery comes off as uncertain, the donor is also immediately uncertain of you and of the idea of giving that amount. Practice the delivery repeatedly, and practice with different figures so that you gain comfort with a range of solicitations.
I speak from experience. My first $10,000 solicitation happened completely by accident and therefore did not go terribly well. It was a phone call from a donor who was asking about making a $2,000 gift for the current fiscal year. Given the enthusiasm of the donor, I wanted to stretch the gift into a five-year pledge of $10,000. I knew from meeting her before that she had the capacity to do so and really had the inclination as well. All I had to do was make a convincing ask.
The problem? The actual words aten-thousand dollarsa had never come out of my mouth before in the context of a solicitation. So I stumbled, and I distinctly remember thinking to myself, I canat believe Iam actually asking someone for $10,000 and then, immediately afterwards, did I just ask her for $10,000?
That is not the reaction you want to be having in your head as youare asking for $10,000. Iam confident that my delivery was subpar, and the polite decline to commit to five years at $2,000 was likely due, at least in part, to my delivery.
Donat Phrase It as a Question.
I keep using the word ask, but itas actually a bit misleading in terms of how you should make the actual solicitation. A good pitch will be 100 percent devoid of question marks.
Phrasing the solicitation, or the ask, as a question implies uncertainty, and you want as little uncertainty in the room as possible.
Again, here the question of style arises. One colleague of mine, because he is able to pull it off in a way that I canat, tells his prospects, aYou should just do it.a While I myself am not quite that bold, I do use phrases such as Iad like you to consider a gift of a I hope that youall consider a proposal of a I would be delighted if you got involved at a level of a Iam currently seeking out folks that our organization has targeted as being able to give at a level of a for this project.
Youall find phrases that work for you. The point is to avoid question marks if at all possible.
Overcoming Objections.
Remember how I began this chapter? I told you that youare going to get rejected. This section will focus on dealing with the myriad of reasons donors have not to give. There are plenty of them, some of them more valid than others. Objections are a common occurrence in fundraising, so itas best to be prepared to hear them. The nature of the objections will vary based on your organization, but there are common reasons that people say no, not yet, or not that much, all of which can arise no matter the nature of the organization.
When you first hear an objection, your initial reaction might be to retract or to say something immediately. The panic b.u.t.ton goes off and you want to escape the situation. You immediately begin to get down on yourself, feeling bad that youare about to go back to your organization empty handed.
Pause. Repeat what you think you heard the prospect say to yourself. Remember to breathe. Remember that rejection is part of the job. Ask yourself if youave heard this rejection before and if you have a response to it.
Before I look at specific objections, letas take a look at two background issues: anger and the nature of the no.
Angry Donors.
Oftentimes, our biggest fear is that a prospect will be angry or disappointed with our organization and will berate us the whole time. To this fear, I say two things.
One: It does happen, yes. Donors are sometimes upset with an inst.i.tution and often it falls to the fundraiser, one of the main public faces of the inst.i.tution, to take the heat. However, angry prospects will likely make up a small minority of your pool or call list. Itas part of the job to deal with angry people, but not the main part of your job.
Two: Angry and upset is actually not as bad as it first sounds. Once you get past the fact that the prospect is angry, you should turn the situation on its head and realize that the prospect is actually presenting you with an opportunity to win back their affectiona and dollars! A colleague of mine said that she enjoys those heated conversations because, to use her words, aThey become like puppiesa if you do the hard work and listen to their grievances and can address them directly, completely, and efficiently, whether during the meeting itself or as a part of your follow up. She has a very valid point: the prospect is yelling at you because they see a problem and they want it solved. It is nothing less than an invitation to impress them. And if you are able to solve the problem, or at least steer the problem down a path towards resolution (if you yourself are not in a capacity to solve it yourself) by connecting the donor to the right folks in your organization, then you really do gain their respect and trust.
Anger implies pa.s.sionate feeling. If they are angry at the organization, it is because they are emotionally (and, hopefully, philanthropically) invested in the work that you do and the affiliation that they feel as a supporter of the work that you do. If they didnat care about your organization, they wouldnat spend the time getting angry.
I tell new fundraisers that I would rather have five conversations in a row with angry donors than one conversation with a complete dud of a donor that says nothing to me the whole time (and Iave had plenty of both). Personally, it is much more nerve racking when Iam in a meeting, making a pitch, and the donor just looks and doesnat say anything. Not getting a reaction is for me more difficult than getting a very negative one. I find it harder to read and harder to know where I stand with the prospect.
What Kind of No Is It?
As the number of asks you make increases, youall be able to discern between hard nos, soft nos, and not yets (and also anot that much [money]!a).
Letas begin with the easiest no, the hard no. This response is pretty unequivocal and unambiguous. And believe me, this can happen both on the first visit and after years of cultivational work. A hard no is donors telling you flat out that no, they cannot give at the level you asked for, that they cannot give to your organizationa"period, and that it isnat worth your time to call them again until well into the future (or nevera which is never really never, by the way). If you get this response, you know that you can cross them off your list of calls for the next year (or maybe even two years). Itas okay. Dust off and get back up again.
Soft nos are nos in which the donor says no, but after some deliberation and with a visible amount of difficulty. Some cue phrases to listen for are aI wish I could,a aI feel really badly saying no,a or some other phrase encapsulating this sentiment. When soft nos arise, close the communication loop by asking very specific, pointed questions such as the following: Is it the amount thatas off?
Is it the timing thatas off?
Is it the funding area that I pitched?
Is it an unforeseen circ.u.mstance?
You can be so direct as to ask them when in the future a gift of the size that you just solicited might be more appropriate. Itas better to be that plain in your follow-up question, so that you can create a clear set of expectations. Youare not walking away from the no, and youare gathering intelligence for when that no might convert into a yes.
Now letas take a look at specific types of rejections that tend to come up often enough that I can hear them in my sleep.
Specific, Common Objections.
I canat give that much / I canat give at the level I used to give at..