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Chapter 1. Neighboring Family
I grew up in a dysfunctional family, surrounded by neighbors, no, strangers who looked at us with sneering eyes. My father, he was a hoodlum and my mother a lady of the evening or for better or worse, a harlot. I thought it was normal, that this life I lived was normal. After all, this was the only life I have known since I was a child.
Though most of the time, they hardly bothered over my well-being and dread going home, home to that deserted house. Gradually, I began to hate life… or so I thought "till a girl older than me appeared like a spring flower.
Her name was Qing Qing and she was born in the middle of winter.
I call her Big Sister Qing Qing.
When she smiled, she had those two sweet dimples adorning her cheeks as her pair of beautiful long hair shone under the rays of the sun. Her pink pleated skirt was an elegant contrast to her white and fragrant figure.
Looking at her… my heart thumped…
I think she stole my heart without notice, without me knowing.
And I fell hard.
She often liked to lull me to sleep and carry me to bed. I asked her one time why she did. Shyly, she said, "You"ll understand when you grow up." Since then, I no longer asked. All I knew was that I wanted to grow up, fast, fast so that I"ll understand.
Because my father was a ruffian and my mother a harlot, their presence at home were hardly seen. But it was fine. Big Sister Qing Qing was here. I would spend most of my evening nights with her. Sometimes, when studying, I"d lose myself in stupor, unable to answer the question. So I would ask her and she was more than willing to help.
Then days pa.s.sed and slowly I grew up. During a cla.s.s in physiology, I learned the difference between a man and a woman. It was then I began growing strange thoughts toward my big sister who doted on me.
Time pa.s.sed again and the teacher called for a parents" meeting. Mother and father were hardly around for they were too busy playing in the outside world so I was left alone. But for odd reasons, Big Sister Qing Qing"s face came to mind. I realized that I had grown to rely on her.
She was the only one I had ever relied on.
When I returned home that night, I happened to b.u.mp into her and quickly I told her about the matter. She readily agreed to my request with a gentle smile.
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On the day of the parents" meeting, she arrived in a fashionable manner, her clothing stylish. The shoulder-length windbreaker, the color of black, coupled with her pink pleated skirt and flesh-colored stockings erupted a sense of greedy urge amongst the crowd.
"Is this your mother?" They were shocked.
"Why is she so good looking?" They were curious..
"So beautiful!" I agree.
But I knew their eyes contained mockery and jealousy. They knew my family situation and they only said such flattering words to embarra.s.s me. But because of my birth origin, I said nothing and silently endured. Who asked to have such parents? I don"t know them. They were only mere strangers connected to me by blood. I"ve never received their love.
A pity, I thought.
After the parents" meeting, I decided that I"d be content with only Big Sister Qing Qing around for the rest of life.
In order to express my thanks and grat.i.tude, I took the initiative and invited her for a meal.
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When she arrived, she walked over and sat beside me. I could smell the scent of her perfume. It was so strong that it distracted me of my senses.
I thought, "What a charming and alluring woman."
She wore her usual pink skirt, her legs wrapped with black stockings. The sight of it made my blood boil, as if millions of ants crawled in my heart. Immediately, I pulled her over, her scent too pure and sweet.
She didn"t resist, not one one bit.
Because I had grown up…
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