Hints for Lovers

Chapter 24

It is a question how far a man admires a woman who knows too much. For,

If there is nothing a man can teach a woman, not even of the ways of love, the man is apt to be chagrined. Besides,

Too much knowledge is inimical to romance.

War is a man"s true trade; love, woman"s.

There is no stronger argument against the equality of the s.e.xes than a woman"s hand. It was made to toil? No; to place in her lover"s. In truth,

Is there anything more fragile in nature than a woman"s hand? But put it in her lover"s. and what a force it has!

Anomaly of anomalies, with women, fragility, delicacy, dependence, beauty, grace,--it is by these weak weapons that she wins. So,

We watch a demure damsel of some sixteen sunny summers much as we watch a delicate dynamo of some thousand kilowatts.

Both seem so calm, so quiescent. Yet both, we know, can generate such startling energy, can bring about such marvelous results.

Many women forget that things which men have no objection to their female friends doing they often have a very particular objection to their mothers, sisters, and wives doing. So, too, they often forget that

It is not the girl he flatters, compliments, and is conspicuously attentive to, that the man always marries. Perhaps this goes to show that

There is a deeper and more serious current in the flow of male emotions, which, much as light and fitful breezes may stir the surface, is moved only by, and mingles only, with a similar and confluent stream. For

It is not man"s highest instincts that are stimulated by the more superficial of feminine blandishments; though, no doubt, many a man there is has been made permanently captive by their lure. The truth is that

Man is a many-sided creature: he will reflect many different rays; but it is only under the ray that pierces the surface and irradiates the interior that he truly glows.

Woman does not lean upon man because she is inferior, but rather because she is his supporter; just as

The b.u.t.tress leans upon the building; but the building would fall without the b.u.t.tress. That is,

Woman"s dependence upon man is his chief source of strength. Those who cannot understand this may be left to their ignorance.

It is not all women who comprehend the exaltation of mind into which some men are thrown by their presence. Indeed,

Men put a higher value upon a woman"s complaisance than she does herself.

To a women, feminine concession appear trivial. Is it any wonder, then, that

Woman calls man"s jealousy unreasonable? In reality,

The affianced man thinks he has gotten him an angel from heaven. It is not within the bounds of mortal male comprehension that such an angel should sully her wings.

Women know their s.e.x.--Which, if it is a truism, is a truism that men often forget. And

Few things permit a man to see so far into the subtleties and intricacies of feminine hearts as a squabble between two of them over himself.

A man in defeat generally turns to woman. A woman in defeat is either scornful, silent, or both.

A man, in depression, falls back upon his only weapon: brute force. A woman, in like circ.u.mstances, does the same. But her weapon is personal charm.

In matters amatory and maternal, a woman will risk more than will a man.

In fact,

In matters amatory and maternal, woman is the truly combative animal.

Many are the members of the one s.e.x that are entrapped by the wiles of the other; but it often happens that the entrapper afterwards rues the capture as much as--or even more than--the entrapped. So, it often happens that

Girls who are deliberately seeking husbands think love may be won by artifice. Not until well on in years do

Women know that, by men, love and artifice are considered mortal foes.

To win him a wife by artifice would be to a man a thing impossible and abhorrent: yet

To win her a husband by artifice is to a woman a thing quite natural.

But

When (if ever) the man discovers that he was won by artifice, there are apt to be several bad quarters of an hour. For, when all is said and done,

The man, free and easy, thoughtless and untrammeled, knowing he may pick and choose, never chooses till--till--there comes the woman he thinks he wants. Then he says point blank he wants her.

Should it ever be revealed to him that his Want was the result of her Artifice, a very different complexion is put upon that Want. On the other hand,

The woman, deprived of the power of choice, trammeled by convention, bound to wait till asked for, quite naturally resorts to artifice. And yet, curiously enough, and a thing incomprehensible by man,

A man whom a woman has won by sheer artifice, she can love to the end of her life. But, after all,

What a refuge, to man, is work--or play! Alas!

Women has no refuge. So,

Men cannot suffer long; women do.

A man flies to work, or sport, or to the gaming-table, or to drink. A woman ... ...

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