I Reincarnated Into a Vending Machine

Jidou Hanbaiki ni Umarekawatta ore wa Meikyuu o Samayou
Author: Hiru k.u.ma
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My field of vision violently shakes up and down, right and left. And, once in a while, the scenery gets blown away at high speeds.

“Hakkon, it’s just a bit longer until lunch, so we’ll take a break ne.”

I hear the voice of Ramis, who’s energetically in the midst of reconstruction work today as well, from a very close distance. Since I’m on her back, of course she’s close, but wouldn’t it be fine to put me down?

I just got back from being kidnapped, so Ramis is always by my side. Though I had been installed on the ground during reconstruction up until now, for some reason I’m being carried on her back. The time she let me go is, other than the times she has to go to the toilet, we’re pretty much together the whole day.
It’s not that I dislike it, but … isn’t her attachment too strong?

“You guys be getting along a little too well. Yo, Hakkon, doing well?”1

The one raising her hand lightly and coming closer is Hyurumi, wearing her black coat today as well. As always, she seems indifferent to her attire and fas.h.i.+on, and her scruffy hair is suitably tied back.
If the time when she was the neatest was when she was kidnapped and confined, what does that say?

“A-, Hyurumi. You look fine now. You don’t feel tired anymore?”

“Oo. Or like, when I was shut up I ate some d.a.m.n tasty stuff, so I’m full of energy.”

These two really do seem to get along well; everyday she aims to come and meet us around break time.

Fundamentally, it gives off the feeling of Hyurumi being the smart older sister, but sometimes it’s an amusing relations.h.i.+p where Ramis asks about her body’s wellbeing while acting like a mother.

“But man, how about letting Hakkon down when you’re working? Ain’t he in the way?”

“I’m perfectly fine, you know. Because I have more than enough strength, and if I don’t have something about as heavy as Hakkon my body is too light, and actually it gets tough to move.”

U-n, your reasons aren’t that alone, na. I’m happy that you’re worried about me, but over-protection, or like, the degree of your worry is way too much. It would probably be better to do something about this.

“But ya know, look, if Ramis be right there all the time, ain’t there gonna be customers who’ll pull back?”

“A, uu-. But, if I leave him, he could get kidnapped again.”

“Hakkon’ll be super careful this time. Right?”

“Welcome.”

“U,u-n. If Hakkon says so, then”

She does it reluctantly, but Ramis sets me on the ground; with a displeased face, her cheeks are puffing out a little. With this I’ve secured a little bit of private time, too. Good job Hyurumi.

To be perfectly honest, being constantly carried caused my sales to drop quite a bit. Well yeah, a vending machine violently moving on someone’s back is going to be a ha.s.sle for anyone with the guts to try to buy products. The two gatekeepers called out once, and so she stopped so they could buy something, though

Ramis keeps sneaking side glances, looking away from the work she was doing to a point where I was worried she would hurt herself.

I’m doing pretty good over here; the customers that have been hesitating to stretch out their hands up until now gathered in front of me. Alright, now it’s time to make back the potential losses.

I sold way more than I expected to at lunchtime; I restocked the things that liked like they’d sell well; since the products are just about all made hot, in order to avoid them going stale, they sat down right in front of the Hunter a.s.sociation.

When it became evening, up until now Ramis stayed by my side and ate vending machine products, but the mindful Hyurumi came and fetched her over to Munami and Okami-san’s temporarily established eatery.

Around this time it’s the usual lull in people, so for the first time in a while I’m a person – – I mean, a machine, by himself leisurely spending the time, when someone came walking through with his head hanging down.

That is, one of the three morning regulars, the young male merchant na. Even though he’s always floating an aimless, pleasant smile, and gives off the good impression of have pleasant manners towards the old couple, it’s like he’s giving off a black aura surrounding his body, he’s depressed to that degree.

“Haa… it’s not going well, naa. Recently it’s been busier than ever. My chances to talk to her are … even though tomorrow’s her birthday.”

Listening to his breathy muttering, I’ve come to an understanding. I’m pretty sure this guy had fallen for the inn’s poster girl, Munami. He’d like the relations.h.i.+p to progress, but he’s worried whether it will go well. So it’s love worries, huh; I’d love to discuss it with him, but feedback is currently not my specialty.

“Haa, Hakkon-san, recently I’ve been worried that I can’t focus.”

From the exact opposite direction of the young merchant approached an extra-large gori … is the money-exchanger’s a.s.sistant, Goggai.

In spite of his looks, that person is gentle, and previously he had watched over a crying child who had fallen until he stood up, and with a “That’s really admirable, standing up all by yourself,” he smiled warmly; he’s that sort of person.

“Oh, it’s the money-exchanger’s Goggai-san, isn’t it?”

“Oh my. For your a.s.sistance several days ago, thank you.”

Since the two of them are acquaintances, they greeted each other lightly.Maa, for a merchant and a money-exchanger to have had contact before isn’t unthinkable. They talked about rumors of the weather and business, exchanging the type of harmless small-talk that neither feels too invested in, and it felt like I was watching a c.r.a.ppy play.

From time to time, both would steal glances in my direction. Apparently, both of them would like to buy something, but even though it should be fine to buy whatever product you’d like even if there’s an onlooker, I should probably do something.

“Welcome.”

“A-, would you like something to drink? Let me get it for you.” (merchant)

“No no, I’ve been in Hakkon-san’s care, so I will.”(Goggai)

The two of them repeated the “Let me”s and “I will”s. Normally speaking, the “Then, I-“ “Go ahead” flow would have been the perfect chance to break out of it, though.

“The, this time I will buy it, and the next time we meet I will leave it up to you; is that fine?” (merchant)

“Understood. I thank you for this time.” (Goggai)

The young merchant drank his usual milk tea, and Goggai drank his usual lemon tea. Both of them chose hot drinks. The season is like early winter, the season when hot drinks are delicious, after all. We’re in a dungeon but there are seasons, it’s a little late to be having problems with it.

“Haa, it’s very calming, ne.”(merchant)

“Hakkon-san really has all sorts of delicious products, so it can be troubling to choose one.”(Goggai)

Even though it’s just the act of drinking something hot together, it feels like the distance between them has gotten a little shorter. Their conversation is livelier than before.

“By the way, this might be a bit rude …but you had a somewhat serious looking face before.” (Goggai)

“Ah, how embarra.s.sing. It’s just, that’s, girl-related worries.” (merchant)

“Is that what it was. Would you like to talk about it? If you say your worries out loud, they will feel a little less severe. Aa-, that’s right. I also have worries about being Akoui-san’s a.s.sisnt, so if it would be alright with you, I’d be grateful if you listened to me afterwards.”

I see; if there’s the situation that Goggai-san will speak frankly about his worries after, it makes it easier for the young merchant to talk. Akoui-san has a severe personality that doesn’t seem like the type to do well with negotiations, so he’s probably forever cleaning up after her.

“Actually, I have an unrequited love for this woman, and I have obtained information that her birthday is very soon, but I can’t think about what would be best to do. I’d like to hand her a present, but we’re not that close at all since I’m just another customer, so I don’t know if she’d be happy to receive it.”

“I see, that is certainly a problem to worry about, ne. Even if the present is expensive, it doesn’t mean it would be suitable. If you were at the level of being quite intimate, there are always gemstones or jewelry, but as a regular customer, if you suddenly handed something like that over, it would give a strange impression.”

“It’s like that, ne. It’s embarra.s.sing to say, but because I was doing business so much, I have no experience in love; to be able to come up with the optimal answer to this is something that’s beyond me.”

Because he’s young man who’s way to serious, he’s probably lived a life with nothing to do with love affairs.

If she was an easy girl, like the ones that are often in contrived stories and games, if you handed anything of value over, even if she says, “E, I can’t take something like this,” she’ll accept it in the end and her feelings for you would soar. But Munami is used to the guys would pull that sort of thing, so even if she accepted it with a smile, that’s it for you.

“In this case, what a normal woman would be pleased with is something that’s moderately priced.”

“So it’s like that after all. I thought so as well, so I came here. I had heard a rumor that when Hakkon-san hears of someone’s wishes, he’ll stock a new product that’s somewhat suitable.”

“A-, I’ve heard of that as well. Products and shape as well will change … This is only between you and me, but in the night business, at s.h.i.+rley-san’s place, the contraception-like thing that they use was provided from Hakkon-san.”

So that was where the information leaked out from. At some point that urban legend, or community legend, rose to the surface. The time of the self-aware vending machine is now.

“Why don’t you try it and request something from Hakkon-san. I’m also interested.”

“That’s true. Even if it’s impossible, I won’t be any worse off; Hakkon-san, did you hear about what we were talking about?”

“Welcome.”

“Then the explanation will be quick. Is there some product suitable for a lady’s birthday present?”

I’ve been thinking the entire time while I was listening, and there was only one thing that came to mind.

It’s fine that the community became lively while in the middle of reconstruction, but, how should I say this, they don’t really have a lot of extra to work with. It’s not like they have a shortage of necessary goods, but the feeling that there’s more and more than enough for leisure can’t be imagined at all.

It might be ideal for hunters and merchants, but it’s not a community where it’s easy to flatter a girl. In that case, here is the new product that I can provide – –

“There’s light … e, he changed his appearance again, ne. E, these are, flowers?”(merchant)

“You can’t get such a splendid arrangement of flowers here. Since this level has a lot of wetlands ne. I have never seen such exquisite flowers before.”(Goggai)

That’s right, I’m a flower vending machine. I’ve changed into mostly gla.s.s walls with many divisions, and in there flowers are lined up. And I can’t stock them unless I’ve had experience buying them, so the variety of flowers that I’ve purchased for Mother’s Day are carnations, roses, the bouquets you’d bring for visiting graves, and lilies.
By the way, I did have the experiences where my mother handed me some money right before I went to buy them.

Since it’s in the midst of reconstruction, the things in town are buildingss and debris in droves. I don’t remember seeing flowers at all. In such a community, if you hand over such colorful flowers, a woman who’d have ill feelings about it won’t exist … I think.

“I see, so flowers. The price is also modest. This is perfect!”

“I believe Akoui-san likes white flowers. I will also purchase some.”

The two bought flowers as they thought best. The young merchant bought bouquets. Goggai bought white lilies.
The appearance of two men holding bunches of flowers somehow give off a warm feeling, though it might just be me.

The two men with their hands full of flowers, looking sideways out of the corners of their eyes at the ground, embarra.s.sed, bowed their heads and took their leave. If it goes well for both of them, that would be good. For a while, let’s be attentive and try to gather information together.

“Hakkon, did you know?”

Several days have pa.s.sed since then. It seems it’s just before the usual winter comes, so the residents are in a hurry preparing to pa.s.s through the winter. I’m in my usual spot doing my sales, when Ramis suddenly asked that.
I have absolutely no idea what she’s talking about, so I put out a “Too bad.”

“Um, you see. Munami and Okami-san right now, they’re in a tent doing their eatery, right? Right now, that place has become really popular with girls. Why do you think that is?”

Even if you say that, na. The information was so little that I’m troubled as to how to respond. For an eatery to become popular, the reason would be the taste, usually. But the part about it being popular with girls interests me. Originally, since two women run the management, I’ve heard that female hunters and residents find it easy to come.
So that said, there must have been something that further meets the demands of female customers. I have no idea.

“Too bad.”

“You wouldn’t know, ne. Actually, in Munami’s eatery, see, there’s pretty flowers set up as decorations. And they’re super super pretty flowers. Just looking at them soothes you –“

O-, the young merchant has come to buy them frequently since then so he often commuted from here to there. Oh yeah, several days ago when the money-exchanger Akoui-san came too, her sharp face was just a little softer. So the effect was immediate.
So Ramis like flowers. I saw the sparkle in her eye when she was telling me the story.
If that’s the case, there’s that, yeah.

“Wa-, wh,what happened, why did you change shape so suddenly … E-, these flowers, Hakkon is selling them?”

Now in flower vending mode, I brought out a pink carnation and dropped it down.

“Ee-, you’re giving me one too!? Thanks Hakkon. I’ll treasure it.”

Hugging it, she happily spun around in circles. If she’s going to be that happy with it, it was worth making it a present. Did you know, Ramis. In the flower language, the pink colored carnation means “grat.i.tude”.

Ramis-chan, you’re cute, but when I think about the fact that you’re pouting about not being able to carry around a vending machine all day, you’re also a little terrifying.
Put who was talking in parentheses for ambiguous places, because there’s usually no indicators other than one uses “boku” and the other “jibun” as their personal p.r.o.nouns. Also, I figured people would actually like to know who ended up winning when they were trying to buy each other drinks.
Also, I have the prologue to a new VRMMO-themed original up as well. For the people that read my originals, give it a look-see.>