"It was just a one-night stand for both of us. I didn"t see him again until I found out I was pregnant. I went to tell him, thought he deserved to know. I didn"t expect anything from him, but it never occurred to me that he would want nothing to do with the baby. He asked me not to put him on the birth certificate, and swore that he would never have anything to do with the baby, and he never has. My parents were a big help, they still are, and I have friends who watch her while I"m in cla.s.s." Sam stopped and took a deep breath, letting it out slowly as she waited for me to say something.
My first thought was what kind of f.u.c.ktard knew he had a baby and wasn"t man enough to be a father to that child, to not even claim it as his own?
I squeezed her leg softly and asked, "How old is she now?"
"Two," Sam replied, giving me a smile for the first time since we"d arrived at her house.
"And you"ve been going to school full time, working, and raising her by yourself?"
"Well, like I said, I have help," she responded softly.
I lifted my hand to her cheek and rubbed my thumb along the bone there. "I"m not happy that you lied, but I get why you did. If I"m being honest, which I always will be with you, if you"d told me the night we"d met at the bar that you were a single mom, I wouldn"t have wanted to pursue anything more than s.e.x."
Sam closed her eyes, as if my words hurt her. I was sorry if they did, but I wanted to be real with her.
"Hey," I rubbed my thumb over her bottom lip and her eyes flew open. "I still would have wanted you. My attraction to you was immediate, but being a guy who doesn"t really date, let alone pursue relationships, I never would have taken the chance to get to know you. I"m glad I did."
"I never tell guys about her, never bring them here, or let them meet her," Sam said throatily. "I didn"t want to let anyone get close enough to hurt us."
I prayed that I wouldn"t be the one to hurt her, but I also knew I didn"t want to let her go. Mother or not, Sam was under my skin, and I wanted to keep her there.
"Have you dated a lot of guys since you had her?" I asked, my other hand sliding up her arm of its own volition as my thumb moved from her lip to her jawline.
Sam"s eyes closed briefly and she shook her head. "I"ve gone out with a couple guys," she said, opening her eyes and looking deeply into mine. "But I haven"t been with anyone since the night I got pregnant."
My stomach clenched and my d.i.c.k began to throb as I looked down at her now parted lips and listen to her tiny gasps of breath.
I was pretty sure that the timing was completely inappropriate, and that we had more that needed to be said, but all I could think about was taking her right there on the living room floor. I wanted to watch Sam come alive for me, and I wanted to feel her body writhing under mine.
As the blood surged from my head to my lower half, all rational thought went with it and I crushed my mouth to hers. Her tongue came out to meet mine, and the moment went from hot to fevered. My brain fogged and my hands roamed as I feasted on her luscious lips.
Sam met me stroke for stroke, her body straining toward mine, her hands finding their way up my shirt. I moved to allow her to take my shirt off, then trailed my lips along her jaw, nipping and licking as I made my way to the soft spot below her ear. She inhaled quickly, thrusting her b.r.e.a.s.t.s up as she did. I moved my hands under her shirt and teased the underside of her b.r.e.a.s.t.s with my thumbs.
Sam"s head fell to the side, allowing me better access, so I obliged and kissed my way down her neck, pausing every few inches to suck her tasty skin.
Her hands on my body were driving me insane. Her soft touch drifted over my chest and down my abs, and my body strained, hoping she would keep moving lower.
"I want to see you," Sam said breathlessly.
I pulled away from her, every inch of me protesting as I did. "Tell me what you want."
Sam got up off the couch and put her hand out to me. I took it and followed her back toward the bedroom I had seen earlier. There was a double mattress on the floor, with cardboard drawers that I a.s.sumed held her clothes in the corner. It was a small room, but Sam had managed to make it look sweet.
She stopped at the foot of the mattress and lifted her shirt over her head, revealing a basic black bra underneath. The bra didn"t interest me, but the milky skin protruding over the top of it sure as h.e.l.l did.
I closed the gap between us and lowered my mouth to kiss the tops of her b.r.e.a.s.t.s, my body hardening even more and leaving her breathy."Yes," Sam said, running her hands up and down my arms as I feasted on her flesh. "I love these."
It took me a moment to realize she meant the tattoos covering the arms that she was stroking.
"So hot."
With every breath, moan, and word, she was making me hotter than I"d ever felt. I loved the way she was responding to my touch and the fact that she wasn"t embarra.s.sed to be vocal.
It was so f.u.c.king hot.
I leaned her back until we both fell onto the mattress. I put my hands out to break my fall so that I wouldn"t hurt her, and let out a sigh when the length of my body was laid against hers. Her skin felt so silky that I wanted to lick my way across it until I was familiar with every inch of her.
I unclasped her bra and tossed it to the side, brushing our naked chests together as I kissed her thoroughly. Sam ran her hands up my back and I thrust against her involuntarily. My needs were taking over.
Sam groaned and brought her legs around me. We were still fully clothed on the lower half of our bodies, but the feel of her legs around me was almost enough to do me in.
I pushed up on my arms and looked down into her flushed face, our bodies still locked at the waist.
"We should stop before I no longer can," I said, my voice filled with regret.
Had he lost his f.u.c.king mind? Stop? What did he mean stop? My body hadn"t been touched by a man in almost three yearsa Stopping wasn"t an option.
"I don"t want to stop," I pleaded, looking up into his heavy lidded eyes. "You feel so good."
Judd closed his eyes, as if trying to hold on to his willpower, so I thrust my hips upwards, hoping to crush it.
"Sam," Judd said in a tight voice. "I don"t have anything with me. I thought we were just meeting for coffee."
I laughed softly, relieved that he wasn"t trying to stop because he wanted to, but because he didn"t have protection.
"I have some," I replied, putting my arms up around his neck. I tried to pull his head down to mine, but he resisted.
"You do?"
"Yeah," I replied, applying a little more pressure to the back of his neck. "I bought them yesterday. I"m on the pill too; I"m not taking any chances."
At my words he relaxed, and I took that opportunity to flip him over so that I was on top.
I"d had enough talkinga I fisted my hands in the hair he had left. It was just long enough to tug lightly as I took his mouth with mine. I teased, licked, and bit his lips before moving my mouth lower. I trailed my hands down and over his shoulders, loving the feel of his taunt muscles. I kissed his collarbone and licked a trail down his chest until I reached a nipple.
At his sharp intake of breath I knew I"d found a sensitive area, so I took my time pulling his nipple into my mouth and biting it softly. Judd"s hands came up off of the bed and started working on freeing my hair from its braid as I made my way over to the other side of his chest. As I straddled him, I rocked gently back and forth, stopping once it felt too gooda I wanted to draw this glorious torture out as long as I possibly could.
When my hair was free, Judd ran his hands through it before cupping the back of my head and bringing me up to him, kissing me desperately.
I allowed it for a few minutes, enjoying the spicy taste of his mouth before I scooted down his body, running my naked b.r.e.a.s.t.s along him as I did. When I reached the b.u.t.ton of his jeans, I looked up at him through the curtain of my hair, running my hands softly along his stomach.
Judd was watching my every move, his hands now clasped behind his head. His face displayed the most erotically beautiful expression I"d ever seen, and I suddenly needed to taste him.
I unclasped his b.u.t.ton and unzipped his jeans before putting my hands in both sides and yanking them down over his hips. Judd lifted his hips to help and I pulled them down viciously. I ran into a road block when I saw his shoes were still on, but I quickly took them off, laughing as I did.
In a matter of seconds his pants were off, my laughter was gone, and my hands were making their way slowly up his legs.
Judd fell backwards onto the bed with a groan, the little shivers racking his body fueling the heat in mine as my hands skittered over his boxer briefs and found their way inside.
I stroked him softly at first, the silky feel of him striking a fire in my panties, before pulling him out and replacing my hand with my mouth. I briefly saw his hands fist the bedding before I closed my eyes and began to move.
I continued to move my hands along his body, reveling in the feel of his hot skin over his straining muscles.
Judd moaned and started to sit, bringing a hand to my cheek and stroking it softly. "That"s enough, babe," he said gruffly. "When I come I want to be inside of you, and if you don"t stop now I"m gonna come."
I gave him one last long lick as I released him, grinning wickedly.
In one swift move I went from being on top to flat on my back. "Turnabout is fair play," Judd said with a chuckle, taking me by the wrists and placing my hands above my head.
I started to retort, but his lips a.s.saulted mine and I no longer had a coherent thought in my head. It was all touch, taste, and sound.
His hands left my wrists and found their way to my b.r.e.a.s.t.s. He kneaded and stroked them as his mouth paid homage to my neck. I heard the soft little whimpers coming from my mouth and it took all of my willpower to leave my hands above my head.
I wanted to touch him so badly.
When he rubbed his face along my b.r.e.a.s.t.s I thought I"d go mad. Then he took one nipple in his mouth while he pinched the other between his fingertips, and I did go mad.
I bucked wildly and brought my hands down to his head, unable to hold my position.
Judd took his time savoring my b.r.e.a.s.t.s, before lowering his head and kissing his way down my stomach.
He didn"t hesitate to pull my shorts roughly off of me. His movements sent my heart racing and the look in his eyes as they sought mine had me feeling like I was going to explode any second.
Judd looked down at my string bikini panties and grinned wickedly. I felt insecurity begin to overtake me, then he lowered his head and began kissing me through my panties and I forgot my insecurities. My hips convulsed and rotated eager to get closer to the heat of his kiss. He began to suckle me through the silky material, and I felt the tension building.
When he lifted his head and ripped the panties from my body, I yelled, "Wait!"
Judd looked up at me, my tattered panties still hanging from his hand. "You okay?"
"I need you inside mea Now," I pleaded desperately. "I can"t it take anymore."
"Where are the condoms?"
I pointed to the top drawer of my dresser, then fell back onto the bed and focused on breathing. I needed to calm down a bit, or I was going to come apart before he even made it inside me.
He"d ripped my panties off for Christ"s sake!
Judd was back before I had a chance to miss him, his mouth finding mine once again.
While he kissed me, he pulled me up so I was sitting on the bed. He was sitting on his legs, and urged me to come forward and straddle him. I held on to his shoulders as I did so, kissing him everywhere I could reach.
I hovered over him briefly, looking into his eyes as I lowered myself, taking him swiftly and deeply inside of me. I let out one deep sigh of relief, pleasure, and contentment before moving up slowly. I pulled up until I could barely feel the tip of him, then plunged back down. The sound that emitted from his throat drove me wild, and I began to move more quickly.
The placement was just right, so every time our bodies came together I got closer and closer to my release. I continued to hold on to his shoulders as I moved, and when I felt like I was about to come apart I whispered, "Right there. Never stop."
Judd put his hands on my hips and held me in place. He thrust upwards, bringing his hips up off the bed and hitting me in just the right spot. I gripped his shoulders and held on as he took me for the ride of my life.
We missed cla.s.s, but I wasn"t about to lose any sleep over it. That had been one of the most amazing experiences of my life. I don"t know if it was because I had actual feelings for Sam a" feelings beyond just wanting to get laid a" or if it was my desire for her that had been drawn out and not immediately gratified. Whatever it wasaI wanted to bottle it.
I already wanted to feel that way again.
I left Sam"s with her number, a smile, and our next planned date.
Leaving Sam had been hard, but she needed to get ready to go pick up her daughter, and I had plans to have dinner with my dad. With cla.s.ses, practice, and cleaning up at Mrs. P"s, my week was busy, as was Sam"s, so we"d decided to wait until Sat.u.r.day for our next actual date.
Nothing was going to stop me from seeing her at the coffee shop on Wednesday though.
Sam said that she wanted me to meet Karrie. I was nervous because I knew that she never introduced any other guy to her kid, and because I didn"t have a lot of experience with kids.
I still didn"t quite have a handle on Sam being a mom. I couldn"t wrap my head around it. It"s not that I was upset, surprisingly, because I really wasn"t. Yeah, she wasn"t upfront about it, but as I"d said to her, I probably wouldn"t have given her a chance had I known. And s.h.i.t, I really would"ve missed out.
The weird thing was that I was kind of excited to meet the kid and see what Sam was like as a mother.
We were going to have a picnic in the park. Something low-key and easy. At least, I hoped it would be.
I rode toward my dad"s, narrowly avoiding having an accident when my mind flashed back to Sam"s face as she"d come. The memory of all that red hair contrasting with her milky white skin was enough to make me swerve my bike.
When I got to Dad"s house I still wore a satisfied grin. He was sitting on the porch and yelled out, "What the h.e.l.l are you so happy about?"
My grin immediately fell as I saw the empty beer cans surrounding him and the cold one in his hand. It wasn"t even five o"clock yet.
"I thought we were going out for dinner, Dad," I said as I walked up the steps, looking pointedly at the beer in his hand.
"s.h.i.t," Dad said guiltily. "I forgot."
"Let"s go inside," I replied. "I"ll order pizza."
"What do I need to go inside for?" Dad asked angrily.
"Come on, Dad," I said calmly. "Just come inside."
I picked up a few of the empty cans and walked inside without waiting for him to follow me. He may get upset when I tell him what to do, but luckily he wasn"t a violent drunk. He was just sad, which continued to break my heart.
I looked around the messy kitchen and felt anger of my own bubble up. When he finally entered the room I turned on him.
"Jesus, Dad, when are you going to start taking care of yourself?"
He looked startled, and then tried to cover it by retorting with, "n.o.body asked you, Judd. I don"t need you coming here and cleaning up after me."
"Obviously you do," I said, my voice calm and low. "Every time I come here you have empty beer cans, unwashed dishes, and trash littering the house."
"Who asked you?" my father asked wearily. "You don"t have to come here, you know. I don"t need you."
I tried not to show how his words hurt me. I knew he didn"t mean the things he was saying, but they still cut deep. He was the only person I had left in this world.
"Yes," I stated firmly. "You do need me, old man."
I walked over and sat at the table, never taking my eyes off of my father.