LOGANThis is getting out of hand.
I don"t know what happens to me when I am with Sophia. I feel it. There is something wrong with me. Something inside me changes. And it takes control over me. I don"t know what it is and I don"t know why it happens. And a part of me doesn"t want it to change and I feel like I have no power over it. No power.
First I said something regretful about her falling for me and now I stare into her soul making her creep the h.e.l.l out. What is wrong with me!?
But honestly speaking, she is beautiful. I kind of have no regrets telling her she has beautiful eyes because she really does. It felt like I peeked into her pureness and I could see so much more. I felt like the time stopped when I looked at her and this feeling is so different. I wanted this moment to last for ever and wanted to be with her, but, reality do exist and in reality, she and I have no chance together.
I keep telling myself to stay away yet I keep finding myself around her, thinking about her or talking to her even though I don"t want to. I"m afraid she"d turn out to be like the reason why I distant myself in the first place. But my heart is telling me to give her a chance and my mind is telling me to keep her away and don"t meddle with her.
Why is it so hard when it comes to her? I feel like I lose my sanity every time I look at her. I"ve never felt this before. It feels so good and so different at the same time and this feeling is so foreign to me. I don"t know what"s happening but I hope that it doesn"t destroy me the way my past did.
"What is happening?" I mumbled, putting my hand on my heart because I felt it beating so fast as I made my way home.
Should I ask Liam about all this?
Or maybe not.
I want to talk to Liam about it but I just don"t know how to, where to begin or what to say.
Reaching home, I was making my way to my room as I received a text
*Did you reach home safely?*
s.h.i.t.
My heart skipped a beat and it took a whole minute for me to come back to senses.
...and I was smiling like a complete idiot.
*Yes. :)* I replied back.
I waited for her text back but after a while I went to the bathroom and took a short shower since I was waiting for a text back.
I changed into comfortable clothes and waited for her text again till my eyelids felt so heavy that I don"t know when I slept.
SOPHIA
Waking up with the thought of Logan is now becoming a usual thing. Although I don"t want it to be. I can"t help it.
He just leaves me so curious, I can"t help it. The way he never mentions anything personal about him and n.o.body in the college knows about him, ughh.
One thing is clear, he doesn"t befriend everyone.
I want to help him though, help him becoming more friendly and open up to other people but what if he isn"t willing to do that. It hurts me to see him like that.
I got up from my bed and followed my usual routine and made way to the college.
Walking to the college Emma called out my name and we walked together.
"Hey, wanna eat together after cla.s.s?" She asked me. "Wait, let"s invite our whole group, shall we?" She continued. "Why not." I replied. Does that means Logan will be coming with us too?
"Okay!" She smiled.
After cla.s.s Emma messaged all of us to gather near the library, and we did.
She asked us all to eat together and to my surprise, everyone agreed.
"My friend is waiting for me." Logan told us. "umm.. your friend can come with us too." I said it out without thinking anything just so Logan can come with us.
There was a silence for a second but then everyone agreed.
He then went to call his friend to come eat with this.
We all waited for him for a while then he came jogging towards us and told us that his friend won"t be joining since he had something urgent to attend.
I sighed in relieve.
I just want to spend more time with him.
Then he smiled at us, his heartwarming smile. By which every froze.
"D-Did he just smile?" Emm tapped Jacob"s shoulder not moving her eyes from him.
"I -I guess he just did." He replied, still their eyes glued to him.
"umm- are we going or not?" He made a wtf funny face.
"Yeah yeah" everyone said together. Snapping back in reality.
So it is true, it"s really once in a blue moon, not to be missed opportunity to see him smile.
We talked and talked our way to the restaurant, we chose the seats near the window since the view was nice.
After we all settled down, Jacob asked what we wanted to eat so we all spoke out our orders.
Logan told Jacob that he"ll go with him to order and as they were making their way to the counter, Jacob came running and whispered loud enough, "this is the first time Logan is actually talking to me. " He smiled and ran back.
We couldn"t contain our laugh so we laughed out loud.
And Logan was puzzled as h.e.l.l.
I was watching them as they ordered. I couldn"t take my eyes off them, off Logan.
After ordering they seated right in front of us and we talked about the usual stuff and Emma started to tell about her family"s restaurant and she invited us there and then Jacob told us about his future interests and everyone talked like we all have known each other for a long long time.
And after a long time I actually felt warm inside, like I"m not alone. That I have friends.
And I couldn"t help but keep looking at Logan and how he was mingling with others was making me happy.
I was so relieved because when I first saw him, he seemed so unapproachable. Now seeing him getting along is making me satisfied. Haha.
After having our lunch when we said our farewells.
"I"ll walk Sophia." Jacob said out of where.
I was startled and my eyes moved to Logan, his eyes, too seemed to pop out but he managed to act like he didn"t care
"Then.... I"ll go with Logan." Emma said smiling at Logan and he agreed.
Huh.
We started walking opposite directions.
I turned around to see Logan just to see him talking to Emma. why do I even care?
And then we walked away from each other.