"I appreciate the effort, but as I said I"ve already made other plans." Her sister must have noticed the way Reba"s gaze fell on the sleeping child. The photographs that filled her parents" house didn"t do the little girl justice. Reba"s heart felt tight, as though a vise were constricting her chest. She didn"t want to feel anything for Vicki"s daughter, but she couldn"t help herself. The desire to hold little Ellen herself was overwhelming. Forcefully she moved her gaze elsewhere. felt tight, as though a vise were constricting her chest. She didn"t want to feel anything for Vicki"s daughter, but she couldn"t help herself. The desire to hold little Ellen herself was overwhelming. Forcefully she moved her gaze elsewhere.
"Ellen"s a lot like you," Vicki said, "I don"t know if Mom told you...."
Reba shook her head, not able to bear hearing it. She was about to turn away when Vicki"s husband stopped her.
"Reba," Doug said sharply. Her sister"s husband looked at Seth and appeared to be asking for a few moments" indulgence. "I know what happened with Vicki and John. It"s in the past-everyone makes mistakes. I have. You have. Wouldn"t it make life less complicated if you could forgive your sister and get on with your life?"
Reba laughed, the scratchy sound as full of sarcasm as she could make it. "No way. If she"s miserable with the way matters are between us, all the better. It"s what she deserves."
"Doug, I told you it wouldn"t do any good." Vicki reached out and touched her husband"s arm. A look of hopelessness came over her face, and she was about to turn away when she stopped and raised her gaze to meet Seth"s.
Reba bristled. Her sister had already stolen one man from her, she"d be d.a.m.ned if she"d let her take another. She was about to say something ugly when Vicki spoke, only this time her comment was directed to Seth. ugly when Vicki spoke, only this time her comment was directed to Seth.
"Make her happy," she whispered. "Make her forget." With tears glistening in her eyes, she walked away.
Doug remained a moment longer. "You"re a fool," he said.
Again Reba was forced to restrain herself from reminding her brother-in-law that he"d married a woman who was as likely to betray him as she had her own flesh and blood. If he wanted to talk about fools, perhaps he should take a close look at his own life.
Not until her sister and family were out of sight did Reba lower her guard. The starch went out of her then, and all at once her knees felt like mush. She exhaled slowly and lowered her head, struggling to regain her composure.
"Are you all right?" Seth asked.
She lied and nodded. Her fingers tightened about his arms, cutting into his flesh. "Thank you," she whispered.
"For what?"
"For not saying anything, for standing at my side." If she"d had the strength and the wherewithal, she would have turned and walked away the instant Vicki had spoken to her. Even now she couldn"t explain why she hadn"t. She"d stood and talked to her sister the way some people linger, fascinated, with the morbid.
Seth"s arm tightened about her as if he"d instinctively recognized her need. He kissed the top of her head and whispered something she couldn"t hear. Something about sincerity. That was when the trembling started, so badly that she was sure others could hear her knees knocking.
"Maybe we should find someplace to sit down," he suggested.
She nodded, barely conscious of what she"d agreed to. "That might be a good idea."
By luck the toy store had a small snack bar and a few tables. Seth found her a seat, left her momentarily, and returned with a cup of hot, steaming coffee. "Can I get you anything else?"
"I"m fine." She refused to allow her sister to ruin this special time Christmas shopping with Seth. Every minute they could squeeze out of their already tight schedules to be together was precious.
Seth stood behind her and rubbed her tired, tense shoulder muscles. "Are you going over to your parents" on Christmas?" he asked.
"No," she stated emphatically, stunned that he would ask. Despite Vicki"s a.s.surances, she didn"t trust her sister, couldn"t. Vicki had proved exactly how untrustworthy she could be. "I"m spending the day with you, remember?" she added, turning to smile up at him.
"I"d enjoy meeting your family." The suggestion was made in gentle tones, as though he feared upsetting her.
He wasn"t making this easy. "Another time."
"Okay," he agreed softly.
She"d thought he"d understood. Thought he"d appreciated her reasons for having nothing to do with her older sibling. Reba had carried the shame of her sister"s betrayal while her family had gathered around Vicki as if she were the injured one. The old hurts, the old pain, returned.
Seth reached for a chair, positioned it in front of her, and straddled it. "Reba, don"t you see? You"re the one who"s suffering. You"re denying yourself the pleasure of visiting your uncle and aunt."
"I"ll see them another time," she returned tightly.
"That wasn"t what you told me after the dinner with your mother. As I recall, you were upset because this may well be the last time you have a chance to visit them. They"re getting on in years, remember?"
Reba longed to place her hands over her ears and block out his words. It wasn"t what he said. She had no defense because common sense told her he was right. She had no argument; she stood on sinking ground and knew it.
This grudge she carried against her sister had hurt her and would continue to do so. Her sister, the wife and mother. Her sister, the wonderful, generous daughter, the mother of her parents" only grandchild. Always so perfect, always so good.
The traitor.
"Perhaps you should head toward the checkout stand," Reba suggested, looking blindly into the distance.
Seth hesitated. "I"m not siding with your sister against you," he said after a moment. "You"re the one I care about; you"re the one I don"t want to see hurt."
"Again," she added, "hurt again." He hadn"t a clue. If he had, he wouldn"t have asked her to work matters through with Vicki. All her hopes for the future, all her dreams, came crashing to her feet and shattered like crystal.
Unlike any man she"d met since the broken engagement, Seth had led her to believe he understood. He didn"t. He couldn"t possibly comprehend what he was asking of her.
Reba joined him just as he was finishing up at the checkout stand and helped him carry the bulky purchases back to the car. She smiled, hoping that they could put this matter behind them.
Soon they were on the road again, heading back to Seth"s house. The silence that stretched between them was like the rubber strand of a slingshot. The pressure so strong, it all but vibrated.
"Reba, I know it"s none of my affair, but you"ve got to let go of this bitterness or you"ll pickle in it."
If he meant to be amusing, he failed miserably. "I don"t want to talk about it."
"You can"t live in the past."
Furious that he of all people would say that to her, she refused to respond. He was the man hung up on a dead wife, the man who"d buried himself in his grief. Vicki was about to do it to her again: she was going to lose Seth, and all because of her sister. her, she refused to respond. He was the man hung up on a dead wife, the man who"d buried himself in his grief. Vicki was about to do it to her again: she was going to lose Seth, and all because of her sister.
"You"ve let what Vicki did jade your entire outlook on life. Don"t you think this whole thing has hurt Vicki, too? It probably has and in ways you"ve never imagined. Have you ever really talked it over with her?"
"As I said before, I don"t have anything to say to my sister, and furthermore I"m not willing to listen to anything she has to tell me." If he thought he was helping, he was wrong. Every time he opened his mouth he made matters worse. Much worse. All he did was repeat what other well-meaning friends and family had said to her. His att.i.tude was one of the sorriest disappointments of her life. She"d expected much more of him.
"But-"
"Seth, don"t," she pleaded, and closed her eyes. "Please don"t say another word."
The rest of the drive was completed in dark silence. He parked his car in his driveway. Despite her unhappiness, she had to smile when two small faces appeared in the window. Judd and Jason battled for the best vantage point to check out the Christmas goodies, hoping for the opportunity to catch a glimpse of what presents they"d find under the tree on Christmas morning.
"It looks like we have a welcoming committee," Seth said.
"So I see."
"If I know Mrs. Merkle, she"s cooked up a feast to tempt the saints. I don"t know about you, but I"m starved."
"I can"t stay," she said, eager to get away. She opened the car door, anxious to make her escape. Anxious to sort through what had happened.
Chapter 24
There"s a reason a dog has so many friends. He wags his tail instead of his tongue.-Mrs. Miracle
Harriett Foster decided she couldn"t delay her talk with Pastor Lovelace any longer. This matter with Ruth Darling wasn"t the only problem, either. G.o.d had graced her with a knack for details, and she"d noticed a number of other good Christians flirting with sin.
Since she hadn"t been able to accidentally-on-purpose b.u.mp into the minister, she scheduled an appointment through the church secretary.
"It"s vitally important I speak with Pastor Lovelace at his earliest convenience," she"d told Joanne Lawton.
When the church secretary had quizzed her about the purpose of the meeting, Harriett had been vague. She"d said something along the lines of the matter being a delicate one that in her humble opinion required the attention of the church"s spiritual leader. She must have been convincing because Joanne scheduled her for an appointment first thing Monday morning, three days before Christmas. been vague. She"d said something along the lines of the matter being a delicate one that in her humble opinion required the attention of the church"s spiritual leader. She must have been convincing because Joanne scheduled her for an appointment first thing Monday morning, three days before Christmas.
Harriett dressed carefully, choosing her best outfit, the one she generally reserved for formal occasions: playing the pipe organ at baptisms and weddings, that sort of thing. Her new black pumps were a tad snug and uncomfortable but would loosen with a bit of wear, she decided.
Generally she avoided studying her reflection in the mirror. She allowed only one small hand mirror in her home; anything larger would be flirting with vanity. And while other Christian women were spiritually comfortable wearing cosmetics, Harriett had never used anything but a light shade of lipstick.
Jewelry was another matter of concern. Her only adornment was a plain gold wedding band and a locket that had once belonged to her grandmother. One day she would pa.s.s it along to her niece. To her way of thinking, a woman in the service of G.o.d would choose to don only what would enhance a meek and humble spirit. Harriett cringed whenever she saw a woman wearing large, looped earrings. And she"d nearly fainted the first time she"d seen an earring on a teenage boy boy. In his nose. nose. The mere thought was enough to cause her to grimace, even now, months later. The mere thought was enough to cause her to grimace, even now, months later.
She arrived promptly, as always, for her appointment. Cleanliness wasn"t the only personality trait that was next to G.o.dliness.
"Pastor Lovelace will see you now," Joanne said when Harriett entered the office. The other woman led the way into Pastor Lovelace"s private study.
The minister was a good man who preached straight out of the King James version of the Bible. Harriett approved of his choice and had let it be known early on. Although young, he possessed a healthy appreciation for the traditional view of such important matters.
He stood as she entered the room and motioned to the chair on the other side of his desk. "Good morning, Mrs. Foster. I understand you wanted to see me."
Harriett sat and folded her hands primly in her lap. "It"s a matter of some importance."
"That"s what I understand."
He sat down and waited for her to continue. Harriett had hoped to exchange small talk and ease her way into this burden on her heart. She inhaled slowly, thinking the direct approach was probably for the best. A soul couldn"t ease into a discussion about sin.
Pastor Lovelace waited silently, and Harriett plunged right in. "As you"re probably aware, I"ve been a member of this congregation for well over twenty years." been a member of this congregation for well over twenty years."
"It seems longer."
"My husband"s family was one of the founding members of this congregation." She bowed her head out of reverence for the dead. "May G.o.d rest his soul."
"You"ve served our church community with great vigor," Pastor Lovelace admitted graciously.
Harriett had always been fond of the man. He showed a keen insight into the many personal sacrifices others had made on behalf of the church.
"Tell me, how is the pageant coming along? Have you enjoyed working with Reba Maxwell?"
"Well," Harriett said with a heavy sigh, and scooted closer to the edge of the cushion. "I understand that when Milly"s husband was transferred, the church was in something of a bind, but personally-"
"From all indications," Pastor Lovelace interrupted, "Miss Maxwell is doing an excellent job, working long hours, and putting a great deal of time and energy into the project."
"Yes," Harriett admitted reluctantly. The Maxwell woman had done everything he said, but the church had taken a risk by allowing a woman, one with spotty attendance at best, to step in at the last minute. Luckily there hadn"t been too too many problems. many problems.
"I apologize, Mrs. Foster, I"ve sidetracked you."
Harriett cleared her throat. "As I was saying earlier, I"ve attended this church for several years now and am familiar with many of the families."
Pastor Lovelace relaxed on his chair.
"It"s because I know the parishioners as well as I do that I feel I can speak freely about their concerns."
"As you see them?"
"Yes." There were things she could tell him that would turn his hair prematurely gray. If he showed any indication of wanting to know the levels of depravity some of the upstanding members of this very church had shown, she"d be happy to tell him. Only as a matter of prayer, of course.
"There appear to be a number of areas of deep concern," she said, meeting and holding his gaze.
He arched his eyebrows. "I"m afraid I"m not following you."
"First off, let"s discuss Emily Merkle." She could tell by his blank look that he hadn"t placed the name. "Seth Webster"s new housekeeper."
"Ah, yes." A smile quivered at the edges of his mouth.
Harriett wondered what he found so amusing. "The woman"s a busybody." And an old biddy besides, but she feared Pastor Lovelace would find her words unkind She didn"t want to alienate him before she zeroed in on the real reason for her visit.
"I find Mrs. Miracle...I mean, Merkle...to be a woman of unique faith."
"Perhaps." Harriett was willing to grant the woman that much. "She certainly has found a way to ingratiate herself with the women of this church in short order." Harriett, however, wasn"t as easily taken in by a smooth tongue and slick manners. The woman was trouble with a capital T. Baking cookies for the women"s bazaar and contributing the recipe for winter fruit dip. Why, it was pure indulgence, that"s what it was. Pure indulgence.
"Don"t you agree?" Pastor"s gaze narrowed as he looked at her. "Mrs. Merkle is a woman of unique faith."
"Faith, perhaps, but I see very little religion in her."
"How do you mean?" the young minister pressed. Something in his att.i.tude changed; she noticed it in his eyes and believed he was keen to hear her response.
"Well, it"s difficult to explain...with words. It"s as if the woman isn"t quite like the rest of us, if you catch my drift."
"You mean she isn"t of this world?"
"Something like that," Harriett agreed. "When she looks at me I"m left with the feeling that..." She didn"t dare voice the truth, not with the opposite s.e.x. The fact was, she"d been left feeling exposed, as if Emily Merkle had the power to know things she had no business knowing.