Sorry, I said two chapters but some stuff came up so I was busy all day.If you can’t wait you can read this chapter without missing anything. I’ll translate chapter 2 later.
—– Sylvia fell ill.
It was the end of autumn when such news came in.
Even though half a year has not pa.s.sed yet, the summer felt awfully far away, the horses came running fast from my birthplace.
It was easy to imagine that it was a bad news when I saw the face of a servant rus.h.i.+ng to me.However, I never thought that it was about Sylvia.
That child should have avoided the tragedy.
That’s why I never thought that the shadow of death is about to take in that child.
On that day, Soleil-sama whom I haven’t seen in a long time took a break and was having breakfast in his room slowly.
Because he had been absent for a long time, occasionally we were talking about whether we should go out, only two of us.
To recreate that day once again, simply because I was in the high spirit from the previous night.
A nightmare was brought about in such a normal, calm day.
It was already written that Sylvia was serious in the letter engraved with a mark of my parents’ household.
The face of the Soleil-sama who announced it, is easy to understand, but he quickly cooled down.
“I will go have a look at the situation,..”
With a disappointed look, he spoke, in a same tone as usual, under the guise of a casual wind about such a thing.
Still, I was able to see he was upset as he stood up with a noise.
Despite the announcement that my sister is about to die, my blood is finally rising to such a state because of Soleil-sama.
(TLN- she’s getting angry.)
I was about to move my mouth without thinking “Why do you have to?”, I breathed heavily and endured it.
I rolled up the trembling lips inwards and bear it in just so that my stupidity does not pop out.
When the taste of blood spread in my mouth, I finally squeezed out only one word.
“… I will come too.”
I was more conscious than usual and gradually lost my words.
Soleil-sama pa.s.seed sleeves on the coat telling the butler that he is going out , and he intends to stay overnight or he is making them gather the baggages.
“I will also come together.”
I repeat the same words once again as if crunching it.
When I was not doing that, I was pouncing Soleil-sama and asking him questions closely.
Although she is my sister, why was I kept in dark?
“I will check the situation” like, as if it were natural to go alone, he said so.
I want to shout that there is no word to put on an Elder sister’s mouth who is about to lose her sister.
“No, because I will go on a horse, you can come in the horse-drawn carriage.”
“I can ride the horse, too …!”
“If you are so upset you will not be able to grasp the reins well, please listen to what I say.”
His feet are rus.h.i.+ng along to get out of the house.
Soleil-sama, left me as if I was going to hold his shoulder, and blocked me out of his sight.
“Please wait,”
“I will also go together,”
“Wait,”
“Wait, please,”
“Soleil-sama,”
My words and att.i.tude crucified Soleil-sama as if I were clinging to him, who was pa.s.sing through the entrance hall at a quick pace.
He does not feel like taking me with him.
Ultimately, Soleil-sama’s exclusive butler told me quietly, coming between us, probably he was impatient with me who was stuck with a Soleil-sama forever.
“Ma’am, we will prepare the horse-drawn carriage, as soon as possible.”
Once again that day, he told me in the same tone as he told me before about the death of my sister, quietly, but clearly.
I lost sight of the back of the soleil while being slightly frightened by the scenery of the day that resurfaced and his att.i.tude that did not say yes or no.
I fell down on the marble floor in the entrance hall which soon regained it’s lost silence.
The butler directed his attention only for a moment, but I guess that he was not really interested.
“I will pick you up, when you are ready for the carriage, so please wait in your room” and He moved away from the spot earnestly with just stating the matter.
“Why is that,”
The doubt that welled up within pours out.
It is my sister who is dying, so why was the letter addressed to Soleil-sama.
I naturally thought that it was addressed to me if it was a letter from my birthplace.
However, the servant came here from the beginning with the intention to hand it over directly to Soleil-sama.
Even if it was from my parents’ household, for example, to write letters directly to the heir of the superior Marquis household, is inconceivable. In case of Soleil-sama, even if the daughter to whom they are connected by blood is his wife, it is a good idea to pa.s.s the letter to their daughter for the moment. No matter how much emergency, it is a n.o.ble’s way to follow the procedures.
Even so, as soon as he told me that it was an useless thing, Soleil-sama received the letter normally.
In front of my eyes, he naturally received it.
The butler did not remonstrate about it,too.
It was as if he knew that Soleil-sama would receive it.
An unpleasant premonition gripped my head.
Perhaps this letter was not the first one to arrive.
I wonder whether all the letters delivered from my parents house had been handed over to Soleil-sama untill now.
And also Soleil-sama did not tell me that the letter was not for me.
In other words, the letter was not from my parents.
My parents are the people who value such things as t.i.tle.
If that is the case, other than my parents, there is not a human being who can send a letter using the name of earl household except for Silvia.
I lost my strength from my legs and attached my knees to the marble floor.
I saw the maids rus.h.i.+ng to me.
I have a bad feeling.
The world is spinning around me.
I instantly turned my palm toward the floor, but the trembling arm fell so easily that I could not support my body.
I have to go soon. I have to go visit my little sister.
Though I thought so, but in spite of my hurry, my vision slowly got darker.
He said that she was seriously ill. I can not even get up anymore.
Far from worrying about my sister, I only remember the jealousy for two people who were exchanging words that I did not know about.
The reason why I think that I must go to Silvia as soon as possible is not because I am anxious about her.
“What was I thinking, what was i, shameful!”
Memories of my life revived along with me turning pale, blood was rus.h.i.+ng down from my head.
My sister’s figure when she died and the delight I felt even for an instant was clearly reproduced.
Previously I did that, and lost Soleil-sama.
Surely, Soleil-sama will choose Silvia this time too.
It was not a feeling of premonition, it was already near conviction.
Actually I was alone and kept in the mansion.
When I chased afterwards him, he turned his back like He was talking to his attendants.
My parents’ house isn’t very far away. Even I could ride a horse, and if it is dangerous as Soleil-sama says, there should have been a way to run on my horse.
And yet, it is not like you wanted to go along with me, it is only because there is something you want to hide.
No, it is doubtful whether there was enough to hide in the first place.
Did not those eyes tell clearly?
You do not want to be disturbed.
You do not want to be deprived of the time with Silvia.
After all, when I fell at the entrance hall, I was brought to my room’s bed without being able to go to my younger sister.
Within a few minutes exclusive doctor of the marquis household was called, after examining with a difficult face, he told me gently.
“You are pregnant.”
“What?,”
I stirred on the bed unconsciously from the unexpected words.
Old doctor who saw it, calmly, pulled on the shoulder gently and put it back on the pillow.
“What, say what?”
Ha, ha, and short breath are coming out.
It was the news I was patiently awaiting for.
In my life this time, I was praying and longing for this more than I did in my previous life.
But, I am much more confused than delighted.
“What, why is it now …?”
I had dreamed of this moment all the time.
Because I was born only for this reason.
It was the greatest obligation imposed on me to bear a legitimate heir of the Marquis household.
I thought that everyone would be blessed when that happened.
I was hoping that the Soleil-sama will surely be overjoyed with delight as well.
But, surely, that is not the case.
“Sensei, Is not there any mistake?”
” … Probably ”
“Sensei, Now, my sister is on the edge of death, ”
“….I’m listening ”
“Sensei , I, I, everybody, ”
(Tln- here ‘yiti’ was used which means everybody)
What should I do, that’s why I tried to speak, but my lips trembled so I could not get any words out.
As the doctor was gently grasping my hands and encouraging me, I’m sure it’s okay to have an irresponsible smile.
Surely everything will go well.
However, although he says so, he’ll notice eventually.
Here, it was unnatural that Soleil-sama had not appeared.
If he knows that Sylvia has collapsed, he may also have heard that Soleil-sama is on his way.
If thinking normally, the couple should go to Silvia together.
Even if considering, you are concerned for my body, more reason to do so.
Because there were even options to ride a carriage together.
“So let me tell Soleil-sama for you.”
“No, no, please do not say that. Now, is not a great time.”
I muttered in my worn out voice.
“It is surely too bad for Imouto-kun, but it is a serious affair even if it is you. Because you’re pregnant with the important heir.”
It is something we can not afford until we get into stable period, so, I have to support my husband.
I was inspired by his kind words and almost nodded.
But, I know.
Soleil-sama will surely regret it.
He will deny me who thought about making a child with me while thinking, why, so why it is now.
And, right now, He will deny my child with a stronger feeling than I thought.
“… Mistress …”
It is so hot that the inside of my eyelids are burning.
“Once the situation is stable, I, will tell him myself.”
“Mistress.”
“So, please, because it will happen in the future, so sensei please dont talk about it , only if it is for now.”
It hurts enough to crush the back of my chest.
“Because, my little sister now, is suffering in her sickbed.”
My husband, now, He should be fighting alongside with my little sister.
So, so, I do not want you to stay together, but I can not help it.
“Ma’am,”
“I am all right. Even now, it’s all right.”
The old doctor is puzzled who was stroking my forehead with his wrinkle-ridden hands.
Tears fell from my eyes, I close off my eyes and get ragged off.
Why is not Soleil-sama here?
It is decided. It is because Silvia is about to die.
Why am I here?
It is decided. Because I was left behind by Soleil-sama.
Through that summer day, I told Soleil-sama that I want to have children.
He smiled coldly and agreed that he would need a heir, as it is his duty and he would do the single job.
But it was still good.
At that time, I thought that was fine.
My family wanted it.
However, I wanted to connect with Soleil-sama more.
Therefore, he handled accepting marriage and having a child like a task like business.
Because I thought that there was time.
I, was incorrigible again, I believed in the future which does not exist.
—– Silvia, will die.
Someone muttered in my head.
Soleil-sama will not pick me this time again.