He"d cut off the circulation in her wrist, but he probably wasn"t aware of how much pressure he was exerting.
"I mean it, Rane," he continued. "Gannon"s right. It isn"t safe for you to be alone up there."
"I"m aware of that. No way I couldn"t be." Later, maybe, she"d ask why he was being so insistent but not now with desire strong and dangerous between them. Either they get underway, or they"d tear off each other"s clothes.
76.
Songan hoisted one of the two backpacks off the floor before releasing her. Instead of descending the porch steps and heading for her truck, however, he stood motionless. On edge, she picked up her pack.
Because the big elk shifter still hadn"t moved, she slipped around him. That"s when she spotted what had captured his attention. Ber stood with his back to the truck"s driver"s side door, and his deep black eyes slowly moved from her to Songan and back again.
The men were pit bulls, two potent males taking their measure of each other. Willing and ready to fight. A lightning strike couldn"t have made more of an impact.
"What are you doing here?" she asked Ber.
Despite the biting wind, he wore only jeans, hiking boots and an unzipped denim jacket over a muscle-hugging white T-shirt. He seemed oblivious to the way the jacket slapped at his chest and airborne leaves and other debris swirled around him. Behind him the gray-black sky promised winter.
"Waiting for you," he said.
"Who the h.e.l.l is he?" Songan demanded.
Even though doing so left her even more off-balance, Rane took her time studying the two men.
Given how they were positioned, she couldn"t say which was taller, not that it mattered. Both were densely muscled and carried themselves in ways that said they were aware of their bodies" full potential. Ber"s hair seemed a little darker and longer, while Songan"s eyebrows were bushier. Neither had shaved recently.
Their clothing was made for a physical life.
Because he was so close, Songan"s warmth didn"t surprise her. At the same time, she swore Ber"s heat was reaching her. The bear shifter gave every appearance of being impervious to the weather, but then she could say the same of Songan.
Two shape-shifters meeting for the first time. Challenging each other for supremacy and without moving a muscle, yet. Both men determined to lay claim to her.
Feeling weightless and disconnected from everything, she hoisted her pack over her shoulder and started down the stairs. She half expected Songan to stop her, and when he didn"t, she looked back at him.
He continued to glare at Ber, who was doing the same.
So this was what it was like to be desired and desirable, she distractedly mused as she reached the ground. Only, was she the prize or were the men more intent on proving themselves to each other?
"You said you were waiting for me. Why?" she asked Ber. Her lips felt numb, and looking up at him made her neck ache.
"I have no choice."
Was he referring to the crazy thing he"d said about her being a vital cog in the Enyeto"s future? h.e.l.l of a time to bring it up if he was. "You ever hear of free will?" she threw at him, when the truth was, she longed to touch him. To explore the connection to her dreams. "It means I don"t have to do anything I don"t want to."
77.
"It"s not that simple."
Irritated and aware, she dropped her pack. Moments ago she"d touched Songan"s c.o.c.k. Now she wanted to do the same to Ber. She wouldn"t, d.a.m.n it! "Whatever. I need you to get out of the way." Ber folded his arms across his chest. "You have to go there? Nothing can stop you." There. Where my mother"s life ended. "Yes."
"Then I"m going with you."
"The h.e.l.l you are," Songan snapped from behind her. "That"s what I"m doing." Songan was right. The two of them had come to a reluctant decision about how today would play out.
As exciting as the thought might be-and it was-she didn"t need two bodyguards.
Only these men were far from bodyguards. They were, what, her lovers? But she hadn"t had s.e.x with Ber. Had she?
"I"ve been listening." Ber directed his comment at her. "Learning."
"Learning what?"
"There"ve been more deaths than just your mother"s and the young elk. Bear."
"How do you know that?" Songan asked.
Struck by the lessening of macho in his tone, she studied Songan, who was studying Ber as if he"d never seen anything like him.
"Death stays in the air and on the ground," Ber said. "And in the hearts of those who witness it." A cop like Gannon probably wouldn"t have any idea what Ber was talking about, but she"d spent enough time around Songan that she understood.
"What did they witness?" Songan asked.
"A rifle being fired in the middle of the night. A bear bellowing in pain, trying to bite where he"d been shot, falling to the ground, bleeding. Dying."
That could have been her mother! Some of it anyway.
"And they," Songan said, "whoever they were, told you those things?" Alerted by Songan"s challenge, she tried to divide her attention between the two men. Once again she was captivated by the similarities between them, the wildness in their harsh gazes. The pure s.e.x flowing through their veins and reaching her.
"Yes," Ber answered Songan. "They did. And to answer the question you haven"t yet asked, I learned what I needed to from deer. Owls. A young cougar."
Wondering if Songan would call Ber a liar, she readied herself for renewed hostility. Instead, Songan slowly relaxed. He no longer held himself as if he was about to attack.
"And you," Ber said.
"Me?"
"When we found the young elk with a bullet through its heart." 78 "You..."
"I was there."
Comprehension exploded in Songan"s expression. "You"re the grizzly." Ber nodded. "I felt your grief as you stood over what could have been your offspring." Songan slowly nodded. "You also watched Rane and me f.u.c.k."
"I"m more than a bear, not that I have to tell you that. Just as there"s more to you than man."
"Elk."
Rane might be part of the conversation, but at the moment she felt as if she"d faded into the background. Songan probably had never suspected any creature except an elk could shift. Maybe the same held true for Ber. It certainly had been like that for her until Ber walked into her world.
This was magical, mystical and unbelievable all rolled up into a single moment. The truly incredible thing was, she was privy to it.
Ber jerked his head at her. "You were going to Wolverine with her?"
"Were? I still am." Dropping his pack, Songan draped a possessive arm over her shoulder. "A bear shifter isn"t the only creature who senses death."
"What are you saying?" she demanded.
Before Songan could answer, if he was going to, a growl so low that for an instant Rane thought it was thunder rolled out of Ber. Grabbing her arm, he pulled her away from Songan and shoved so her back was against the truck. He kept her there via a hand against her shoulder. Even with the wind beating at her, she felt herself drifting back to her dreams. She wouldn"t be surprised to see rope appear.
"Don"t go." Ber"s breath warmed the top of her head. "There"s no reason for you to risk-"
"It"s my decision!" She surged forward then sunk against the truck again when he continued to hold on to her. To her shock, hot need slammed at her. She fought it the only way she could think of, with words.
"No one"s holding a gun to either of your heads. I"ve been there any number of times. Obviously neither of you has enough human in you to understand. I"m not going to waste my breath trying to explain why I have to do this."
Ber wasn"t the only one who growled when he was agitated. So did Songan, as witnessed by the low, sharp note erupting from deep in his chest. Grabbing Ber"s arm, Songan spun the bear shifter away from her. Thank goodness Ber had the presence of mind to let go of her. The instant she was free, she shoved herself between the two would-be fighters.
"Stop it! You"re acting like animals!"
"We are," the men replied almost as one.
"Whatever. Look, arguing like this isn"t going to get us anywhere. If you two draw blood, I"m not going to bandage you."
79.
"Won"t you?" Ber challenged. The way he was looking at her, she wondered if he knew about her dreams. Was responsible for them.
"Look." She stumbled over the word. "The last thing I want to do is deal with a couple of oversize egos and even more oversize muscles. If I don"t get to Wolverine today, it might not make any difference until spring. What I said about going alone isn"t-Songan, I need your hearing and sight."
"And mine," Ber said.
"Why?" Songan asked when she thought he"d tell the bear shifter to leave them the h.e.l.l alone.
"I have my reasons."
"Which are?" she blurted, still trying to absorb everything that was happening.
"You don"t need to ask."
No, she didn"t, did she? He was hung up on his belief that she was vital to the Enyeto"s future. She wasn"t about to try to explain that to Songan. Let Ber do it.
"You learned about the bear deaths," she said, hoping to change the subject. "I"m sorry. That must have hurt."
"The blacks here are a kind of kin, part of me."
Ber"s eloquent words made her heart ache. "Do you know why they were killed?" As he shook his head, she acknowledged that, despite his human form today, Ber didn"t fully understand what it meant to be one. Like Songan, he existed on the fringes of modern society and maybe didn"t fully comprehend what humans were capable of. The evil in some of them.
Trying to keep the telling as basic as possible, she relayed the conversation she"d had with Gannon.
Even before she finished, Ber"s confusion turned into barely contained rage. He paced from the truck to her porch step and back again. Watching him, she concluded that, as Songan had done, he"d come to her place as a beast. Not only didn"t he have any transportation, he didn"t have a decent winter coat.
He frightened her. No way could or should she deny that. At the same time, watching his effortless movements thrilled her. He was perfect, raw and proud, savage beneath the surface.
d.a.m.n him, he didn"t need to throw ropes on her. She"d come to him of her own free and hungry will.
If he didn"t make the first move, she"d rip off his minimal clothes, launch herself at him and beg him to bury his c.o.c.k in her s.e.x. They"d f.u.c.k standing up, him holding her in place while her nails clawed at his shoulders and he bit at the side of her neck.
They"d climax in the same heartbeat. Scream their shared pleasure.
"I"ll find whoever has been doing this. Tear them apart."
Ber"s hate-filled voice yanked her back to reality, but even as she threw her pack into her truck bed, she knew she"d eventually have to ask Ber whether he"d deliberately planted the edgy dreams in her.
Dreams?
80.
"I don"t have a coat that"ll fit you," she told Ber. "And even if he had an extra"-she jerked her head at Songan-"I doubt if he"d lend it to you. You can throw my sleeping bag over your shoulders if-"
"I"m fine. Not cold."
"And if you get chilled, you"ll turn into a grizzly, is that what you"re saying?" He nodded.
"Fine. Whatever. My truck. My keys. And my gas after I"ve gone to the station. My plans haven"t changed. I"m still going to drive as far as the road will let us before taking off on foot. Look at the weather.
It has to be done today."