I smiled and shook my head.
"Good." He kissed me then, long and slow and deep. He hugged me tightly before pulling away. "Come back to bed?"
"Yeth," I whispered, the words still foreign to my tongue. He kissed me once more and left me. I looked out over the moonlit water once more and said my goodbyes before following him, my prince, my soulmate, my love.
Love.
It was the reason I lived.
WELL-BEHAVED MERMAIDS RARELY MAKE FAIRY TALES.
Every mermaid"s mother warned against the dangers of rescuing humans. Obviously had Nerissa"s mother ever attempted such a thing, she would have mentioned the smell. Men stank of sun, fire, earth and something that made Nerissa"s scales crawl. They were heavy, too, not made for swimming, for all that they splashed around madly in the surf like they were. And all that strange raspy breathing!
Thankfully, seawater seemed to stop their bleeding quickly.
Nerissa stared at the fiery wreckage of his ship still aflame on the horizon. The man in her arms was the spitting image of the one from her dreams...minus the webbing between his fingers and the fins...and the inner eyelid. Waking, he stared up at her with eyes as blue as the sky.
"I love you," he said with foul breath. He clutched at her black tresses, limp now in the dry air.
Nerissa could not return to the waves fast enough. From now on, she would listen to her mother. She would never speak of this event. And should she ever again be tempted back to these jagged rocks....well...there were always more humans on the sea.
BLOOD FROM STONE.
He had no idea that I loved him. He barely acknowledged that I existed, a maid twice over, little more than a shadow in empty hallways. Trapped in unhappy marriage and prisoner in his own castle, he did not conceive that anyone loving him was even possible. The baron was a man of war, not of love.
He was also an a.s.s, but like Maman said, so many men are.
He"d borne arms with Jeanne d"Arc in Orleans, had witnessed firsthand the divine power she had wielded. Sorceress, they"d called her. Maman had shared a similar fate, for far less a magical offense.
The baron was so much more deserving of that power. If there existed a man with more confidence, more pa.s.sion about things beyond the realms of heaven and earth, I never knew of him. Prelati was a pompous, hand waving fool in comparison.
After testing the limits of his seemingly boundless wealth and ultimately finding it, the baron surrounded himself with books and candles and crucifixes in his barren estate, refusing to believe that divine voices could only be heard by the ears of unspoiled females. Yes, it was Prelati who suggested that he was imploring the wrong deity, but it was I who sent him the first child.
"Perhaps those among the fallen might better relate to the sons of Adam."
Prelati"s silver-tongued accent echoed through the chimney from which I swept the ashes. The charlatan must have been standing directly in front of the fireplace in the baron"s study for his words to have landed so crisply in my unspoiled ears.
I heard the baron"s response, rumbled deep from his strong chest, but I did not catch the words. His tone asked a question.
"I will consult my books," replied Prelati, just as he always did. Hidden as I was, I couldn"t resist rolling my eyes. Prelati made a far better librarian than an alchemist, or a sorcerer, or a demon-speaker, or whatever color the robes he was wearing today suggested.
Too curious to be privy to half the conversation, I tripped over the ash pail and tore through the cloud of dust out the door and down the hall, hoping to better eavesdrop at the seam between the sitting room doors.
The doors were open.
"I don"t care which one, Prelati. Choose whomever-or whatever-you want. I just want some sort of answer, angel or demon or otherwise. There is a way to escape this place, and I will find it. Henriette! You read my mind. Stoke the fire, girl, there"s a bit of a chill."
The room was dark; Prelati"s idiot form blocked what little light escaped from the dying fire, casting giant shadows of him against the walls hung with thick velvet tapestries to keep out the stones" cold. The air was bitter with the unnatural balsamic tang of Prelati"s infernal frankincense.
Prelati scowled at me beneath his great beard and mustaches, so black and thick that he might topple over at any moment with the weight of them. I scowled right back. I didn"t care what Prelati thought of me, and he knew it. I worried more that the baron might see an ash smudge upon my cheek, though I was of less note to him than a pebble in his shoe. He ordered me about in the same breath he spoke of summoning demons. I was neither a benefit nor a threat to him and his situation, and he was a skunk for thinking it.
Lord Polecat.
I quickly knelt on the marble hearth, so that only the fire witnessed my grin. I dutifully shoveled the white and gray ashes into the almost full metal bin-the baron often spent long hours in this study, and I was not usually permitted to attend to the fire while his lordship was present. I"d make sure to carry this one away with me when I departed and replace it with the now-empty bin I"d knocked over in the adjacent room. I considered hiding it from cook for a few days before she set me to making the lye soap again.
"We will need candles, my lord, and soft chalk," said Prelati. "If you will excuse me, I will prepare a few new scents that might persuade more unlikely visitors."
I stifled another grin. They"d have to sc.r.a.pe the bottom of the barrel to summon anything more unlikeable than Prelati. My father might have met that criteria, so it"s just as well I"m a b.a.s.t.a.r.d child. Perhaps I could persuade the baron that my sire had been a demon; he"d have no choice but to notice me then!
I moved quickly across the room with the quiet grace all servants practiced, allowing not so much as a clank from the exceptionally heavy ash bin. Prelati rattled on about his needs and preparations. I dropped a small curtsey to no one and turned.
"Henriette, please send for Poitou; I need the carpets in this study removed."
My breath caught, my chest ached, and my heart skipped a beat at the sound of his voice and the thrill of being addressed, if not seen.
"Yes, sir," I said politely. I curtseyed again and jauntily swung the metal down the cold, dank hall.
I already had plans to make a far more lasting impression.
Unnoticed in plain sight, I monitored their progress for weeks. Every time I crossed the room I skipped and hopped over more and more shapes drawn across the marble. What the baron lacked in funds, it appeared he did not make up for in artistic ability. The air, thick with Prelati"s incense experimentation, went from spicy to sweet to cloying; I wondered if he"d begun urinating in the thurible as a last resort.
I continued to empty the ashes from the fireplace while the room was unoccupied, an ever-dwindling window of time in the wee hours of the morning while the men pursued their supernatural prey. Spell after spell failed. I collected my ashes and waited. The morning finally came when the study door was locked, barring me from entrance. Beyond I heard the baron"s frustrated, sleep-deprived tones berating Prelati for their constant failure.
It was time.
I excused myself from the palace with a message to Cook that I was to run an errand for the baron. I did not speak untruth-the errand was for him, every thought in my head was for him. I covered my hair with a scarf, took a woven basket-so much lighter than ash pails-and walked briskly down the hill into town. The smile never left my face and there was no chill for me that day. The angels had heard my prayers. Patience would deliver me my true love"s heart.
I did not have an appointment, but I did not expect to see the furrier himself. "I am sorry, mademoiselle," said the furrier"s very new and very young apprentice. "But if it is for the baron, perhaps the master will not mind if I go to him."
Brave child; he looked frightened to death at the prospect of disturbing his master at work. I tried to put him at ease. "What is your name, cherie?"
"Jeudon, mademoiselle."
"Jeudon," I smiled. "It is my own fault for arriving unannounced! I do not think we need to bother your master with this. In fact, I think you might be the perfect person for this job." Angels, hear my prayers.
It worked. Jeudon"s shoulders relaxed. "Anything at all, mademoiselle. For the baron."
"For the baron. Of course! Thank you, Jeudon. But first, I will need to see a sample of your work. I trust your master has started your training on smaller animals, n"est-ce pas?"
"Oui, mademoiselle. Squirrels and rabbits and the like."
"I don"t suppose you"ve experimented with skunk? Polecat?"
Jeudon"s silence at my request answered the question, but I waited him out with a grin.
"Mademoiselle, I would never... For the baron..."
"I insist, dear Jeudon! Take me at my word; the baron will be ever-so-impressed that you have such a unique specimen on hand." I reached into my ap.r.o.n pocket, removing seven small pennies-my meager life savings-and I sent up another prayer to those mysterious angels. "Please deliver the fur yourself. This is for your trouble."
"Me, mademoiselle?"
"Yes, please, Jeudon. The baron will want to both pay you and thank you in person. I suggest you make haste!"
The boy did not think twice before rushing into the workroom and scampering out the door with no less than three small pelts in his hand. He left no word for his master, written or otherwise. Just as well. It might be days before anyone discovered he was missing.
a.s.suming, of course, that the baron understood my gift to him, but I trusted my beloved implicitly.
I spent the next few days making ash soap in the stench-ridden bowels of the castle. It didn"t go unnoticed that every room in the castle but the study had lain unused for a month"s time. Cook had taken me to task for idling in hallways and banished me thence. The rough, oversized gloves scratched at my knuckles, raw from the cruel ministrations of her wooden spoon, but as not wearing gloves would have been a worse punishment, I bore the pain. I slowly lowered an egg into the still-warm pot of lye, fresh from the fire.
"The baron"s called for you."
Cook"s announcement from the doorway startled me, and I unceremoniously dropped the egg into the pot, splashing droplets upon my gloves. The egg sank below the surface. I yanked my hand back, pulled the glove off, and fished the egg out with my long-handled spoon. The egg should have bobbed back to the top-this pot would need a bit more time on the fire. But not right now.
I nodded, curtseyed, and slipped beneath Cook"s hefty bosom that barred the doorway. I forced my feet to slow, but my heart was flying. I wonder if he"d said my name again, out loud, with those perfect lips, or if he"d just sent a message through Poitou for "the girl who cleans the fireplace." No matter. The baron needed me, far more than he realized.
A full bin of ashes met me outside the study door, so I fetched the empty bin from an adjacent room before knocking on the door.
"Enter."
Oh, if only you would let me. But I dared not meet his eyes. Did he suspect I"d sent the boy? "I"m here for the ashes, my lord." I bent my knees, crossed the room to the fireplace, and stopped dead at a sight I"d never thought I"d see: Prelati on his hands and knees with a scrub brush and bucket.
My hand was too late to hide the smile that betrayed me. Palm firmly clamped over mouth, I skirted around the magician and threw myself down at the hearth. The fire was naught but embers now, but it had burned hot and high and left the ash white. It was also slightly greasy and smelled faintly of brimstone.
Dear, dear Jeudon, I thought, as I shoveled him into my bin. The lard in the mix would undoubtedly make a finer soap. I was too busy wondering how to sneak a batch aside for myself to notice that the room behind me had gone silent. No whispers, no movement, nothing...which could only mean that I was suddenly the center of their attention. I stood tall and dusted my clothes off the best I could before turning to face the two men, both standing now.
The baron was looking at me.
Prelati"s gaze slipped to the spot where he"d been scrubbing, and my eyes followed. No doubt they had finally discovered the lengths to which their artistic talent did not go, and chosen to erase the chalk and charcoal and start afresh. True, the lines had been erased, but beneath remained a large, pale pink stain on the perfect white marble.
There was only one thing that stain could be: blood. What would they do with me now that I"d seen it? The baron stared with those intensely hard eyes, sizing me up. I raised my chin and stared right back.
"Do you ever wash floors?" he asked.
"I make the soap," I boasted.
"Have this floor clean by sundown, and we will never speak of this again."
"Yes, my lord." I bent my knees again, collected both ash bins, and went belowstairs to retrieve the soap I"d been stockpiling for this very occasion. I"d considered pocketing some in my ap.r.o.n in preparation for this summons, but I didn"t want to play my hand too soon.
Charming, how completely predictable the baron was. But like Maman said, so many men are.
I returned with soap, gloves, and a pot to warm water over the fresh fire I"d built up. I crumbled the lye into powder and set hard to the brush, careful not to get anything on my skin or clothes. It was no easy task, and not quickly done, but before sunset I"d removed every trace of blood from that stone. I stopped on the way back to my rooms only long enough to ask a scrawny young thing to replenish the wood in the baron"s study. I didn"t bother asking his name.
It was several more days before I was shoveling his ashes out of the fireplace and scrubbing the study floor again. I worked privately and efficiently. As promised, the baron said nothing of the matter.
The third time the baron sent for me, I brazenly spoke without being addressed. "I will clean this floor for you, but I want something."
"We let you keep your life," prattled Prelati. "What more could you possibly desire?"
"In order to properly remove a stain, it"s best to catch it right away." My eyes never left the baron"s. He knew what I meant.
Or did he? His eyes left mine long enough to gauge Prelati"s reaction to my comment.
"Your services are no longer required, girl." Prelati put a hand on the small of my back to lead me to the door and I slapped it away.
I turned to the baron and bowed deeply, in the manner of a chevalier and not a scullery maid. My heart beat like a battle drum. "As you wish, Lord Polecat. You may fetch your own errand boys from now on."
I straightened, expecting to see a sly grin upon his countenance with the realization that it was I who"d sent the fitch. What met me instead was a drawn mouth and furrowed brow. I admit I was a little disappointed that such an admirable man like the baron could be so stupid. But like Maman said, so many men are.
Heart in my feet now, I moved to walk away. The bin felt twice as heavy, its scorched refuse now burdened with the leaden weight of my shattered dreams.
"I will do anything."
The baron"s voice was low enough to almost be unheard above the crackling of the fresh blaze in the hearth. "I will stop at nothing to regain my fortune, my power, and be free from this place. I will defile heaven and pull demons out of h.e.l.l to do my bidding. If you get in my way, I will kill you."
I did not turn back at his words, but I did straighten. The ash bin suddenly felt lighter. "I accept those terms" was all I said before leaving the study.
The next time the baron "sent for a messenger," I accompanied him into the study...and stayed.
Those next few years were the happiest times of my life. Instead of letting our failed attempts at summoning get the best of us, we made a game of it. We gathered young boys from far and wide, for a variety of reasons, and never raised so much as an eyebrow of suspicion. We sometimes drew it out for days, seducing the boys with lavish feasts and mulled wine and games. The baron was pleased to discover that I had a steady hand at runes, despite the hard calluses I earned from scrubbing and soap making. I drew many a circle and lit many a candle. Sometimes we let the boy draw and light them himself. We would stoke the fire high and keep it hot. We always burned the clothes first.
Over time, I even came to tolerate Prelati. It was never anything so bold as "friendship," but we knew each other for what we were, and we each respected the other"s loyalty to the baron. Prelati saw that I was a quick study and taught me to read so that I might continue their conversation with new ideas and a fresh perspective. After months of watching me soak ashes in rainwater and strain liquid and boil lye, he invited me to experiment with his incense. I, in turn, taught them both the rudiments of soap making. The baron had a deft hand at floating eggs. I imagined those strong, careful hands on my body many, many more times than I"d like to confess. And the marble was so much easier to clean when we could pour the hot lye right down onto the fresh stain.
I did not let the baron touch me intimately, though I knew at times he wanted to. It was a rush to have such power in one"s hands, to literally feel lifeblood slipping from between one"s fingers. I drew my best work in that blood. We cleaned the middle of the floor so well and often that I was eventually forced to scrub the rest of the study to match.
Our efforts were not entirely unsuccessful; otherwise, we wouldn"t have wasted so much time. There were days when the candles" flame changed color, or the air filled with tiny starbursts of light. Some chants brought a wind that left the room in complete darkness. One even made it rain indoors-I ran so much that day saving the ash pots and collecting fresh water that I fell asleep in wet clothes on the wet settee and did not wake until the next afternoon. Certain chants made the incense smell strongly of roses, or rot. The flavor of everything we ate on those days was wrong. Not always bad, mind you, but roast duck that tastes of chocolate pudding is a shock to any palate.
We celebrated our little triumphs. We danced barefoot in the blood, painted ourselves with red and black and white, finished off the mulled wine and sang every silly song we knew until we"d exhausted our repertoire. Then we pulled on our bootstraps, divined what we could from the entrails, added to Prelati"s endless stack of notes, and cleared the stage for the next attempt.
I began to dread the day we actually summoned a demon, when I would lose my place in this exclusive club, and lose the baron altogether. My baron. We were close to success; I knew it. I could hear it on the wind. I could taste it in the spiced air. I could feel it in my bones. I feared it so much that I finally let him kiss me.
"Let me in," the words were soft, growled into my neck in frustration. My toes slipped in the blood beneath our feet, but I held my ground.
"Make me your wife," I whispered back.
"I have a wife," he said, and not kindly.
I placed my palm flat on his wide chest, leaving a small red print on the white silk. "Your t.i.tle is married to her. Not your heart."
The next day, he stole us a cleric.
I took an inordinate amount of time preparing for the ceremony. I believe that Prelati deduced my plans-he was smarter than I"d previously given him credit for, especially with regard to subterfuge and mental manipulation-but he said nothing. He mixed the incense concoction we"d agreed upon and painted my face and arms with the necessary symbols after I"d baptized myself in rainwater.
We exchanged gifts, the baron and I, as per tradition more than as a requirement of the summoning ceremony. I gave him a waxen dolly in his own image, as Maman had taught me to do in life, and then taught me never to do again with her death. From my baron bridegroom I received a solid white egg...that I almost dropped when he placed it in my hands. Upon further examination, I realized it was fashioned out of pure white marble-the perfect symbol of the birth of our love for each other. I slipped it into the pocket of my dress so that no blood would mar its pristine surface.
We built up the fire and lit the candles, and when all was ready, Prelati untied the cleric.
The wise man must have realized his fate, for he did not rush the ceremony. My girlish sensibilities thanked him for every extra moment I was allowed to stand upon the symbols with my beloved"s hand in mine.