Should you wish to write to me, you know my direction Keizersgracht ca.n.a.l, Amsterdam.
Yours, Nicholas Noordholt, formerly Hesketh Midori balled the missive up in her hand and threw it into the grate. She didn"t think she would need to write to Nico, but even if she did, she wasn"t likely to forget where his house was situated. And his pointed reminder that he had legally changed his name and therefore hadn"t lied about it didn"t help. You still weren"t honest with me, so how could I ever trust you?
The answer was that she couldn"t and she"d been raised to value honour above all else. A man without honour was worse than the eta, the lowest of the low.
This was her life now and she had to accustom herself to it. But as her breathing became more even, Midori wondered where Nico was now and whether she would ever see him again.
Nico stood by the porthole in his cabin and watched the English coastline sink below the horizon. Inside, he felt numb, as if parts of him were missing, and his thoughts were bleak.
I should never have left her there. She can"t possibly fit in. If she won"t marry me, I should have found another way. The guilt ate away at his insides, gnawing relentlessly, giving him no peace.
He clenched his fists. "It was her decision," he said out loud.
But they will try to change her. The image of a smiling Midori being beaten into submission by her uncle etched itself on the insides of Nico"s eyelids and he rubbed at them to make it go away.
"By all that"s holy," he muttered, "he"s not like that." Although Jacob had thrown Nico out of his house in anger once, he hadn"t actually hit him. So there"s no reason to suppose he will beat Midori.
Perhaps he should have stayed longer, tried to find out more about the impending civil war before leaving Midori in Plymouth? How will I know she"s all right?
Ah, but I"m forgetting Midori"s own skills in that department. Surely she was fully capable of defending herself? Any soldier trying to attack her was in for a surprise. He couldn"t help but smile at that thought.
What if she refuses to do as Jacob asks? He leaned his forehead against a windowpane and closed his eyes. There was a wilful streak in Midori, a steely determination which had helped her to get this far, but it could lead her into trouble. "I hope she can adapt and accept her circ.u.mstances," he whispered. They would punish her, if not physically, then through other means. Her lovely hair! A woman who misbehaved could have her hair cut off as punishment, and even the thought of that made Nico cringe. Or what if they throw her out? If Jacob truly was a Puritan, he"d be obsessed with immorality and repress vice wherever possible. A heathen, Midori would not be tolerated.
But she said he"d promised to let her make up her own mind. Would he?
Nico began to pace the small cabin. Should he turn back and wait until he could be sure? No, I can"t afford to lose any more time. He had stayed too long in England as it was; he had to report back to the Heeren XVII in Amsterdam now if he wanted to continue his career with them.
Harding. Nico had asked the man to keep an eye on Midori somehow.
"I"ll pay you for your trouble, of course." Nico had pressed a handful of coins into the old sailor"s palm.
"No, no, that"s not necessary," Harding protested, trying to return the money. "I"d be happy to help her any way I can, you know that. Fond of her, so I am."
"Well, keep it just in case," Nico insisted. "You may need it for her."
Harding agreed to that and promised he"d help Midori if the Marstons threw her out.
"Send word to me if either of you need a.s.sistance, won"t you?"
"Aye, I swear it. Don"t you fret none, all will be well."
Nico ground his teeth. He wanted to believe Harding, but it wasn"t ideal. Still, it was the best he could hope for. With a heavy sigh he lay down on his bunk and closed his eyes. He must put Midori out of his mind; she wasn"t his concern any longer.
Chapter Twenty-Three.
September 1642 Dear Ichiro, I am writing to you, as promised, to inform you of my arrival in England. The journey was somewhat eventful, but Captain Noordholt kept me safe. He has now gone back to his home in Holland.
I am slowly adjusting to life here and do my best to please my uncle Marston and two aunts. I am determined to fit in, as we discussed, and apply myself with diligence to learning everything I can, both in regard to religious and domestic matters. I have duties, like helping in the kitchen, not because there is a lack of servants, but because here no member of the household is allowed to be idle. It is a novel experience, but I find I enjoy it and time pa.s.ses quickly. I have acquired many new skills, such as baking, candle-making and how to make cheese, a staple of the English diet it seems. I think you would like the taste of it I do.
With my uncle"s help, I now understand the Christian doctrines much better. He has made me see what a wise man Jesus of Nazareth (the son of the Christian G.o.d) was and that makes it easier for me to follow his teachings on how to behave. It is all beginning to make sense and Uncle Marston is pleased with my progress, although naturally I still follow j.a.panese customs (albeit in secret so as not to offend my uncle).
I have a young cousin, Temperance, who is very sweet. She is extremely knowledgeable, despite her tender age, and accomplished in most household duties. I find it much easier to learn from her, since she can be relied upon to explain things in a straightforward manner. In return, I tell her about j.a.pan and our life at Castle Shiroi. She considers this exotic and has an almost insatiable desire for more information. I admit I don"t mind satisfying her curiosity as it helps me to keep the memories alive in my own mind.
I trust you are well, and your wife and the children also. Please write to me if you can.
Your obedient sister, Midori Midori put down her quill and sighed. She had no idea whether her letters would ever reach Ichiro, although her uncle had said he would try to find a way of forwarding them via the English East India Company"s ships to the Far East. She bit her lip to stop the homesickness from flooding her mind and tried to remain optimistic.
I"m sure my messages will get through somehow.
"I"m afraid the ships for the Far East don"t leave until earliest January, but if you don"t mind travelling north instead, we have one going to the Baltic next. The captain"s just been taken ill so we need someone to take his place."
Nico was in the presence of only one of the Heeren XVII this time, which was a lot less intimidating. He hadn"t expected to be given employment immediately, so the man"s proposal was a nice surprise. Nico felt restless and needed something, anything, to do.
"That would do very well, thank you," he a.s.sured the director. "I"ll go anywhere as long as there is profit involved."
"Yes, well, it won"t be as much as for the Far East journeys, but there are valuable cargoes to be found in the Baltic, too." The man added with a small smile, "Your wife will expect you to return with furs and amber jewellery, I"ve no doubt."
"I"m afraid I don"t have a wife." Nico tried not to bristle. Why was everyone in the VOC so interested in his marital status?
"Oh, I beg your pardon, only I thought a man such as yourself would have been snapped up by some lucky lady a long time ago."
Nico tried to smile at the compliment. "No, not yet, but perhaps I"ll purchase some amber just in case."
"Good idea. Now here are the details of the journey ..."
As Nico was briefed, he tried his best not to think of the only woman he"d ever proposed to. Would she appreciate jewellery and furs? Should he have tried to woo her properly? He doubted it would have made any difference. She placed more value on honour and honesty, neither of which she believed he possessed.
If he ever wanted to win her hand in marriage, he"d have to prove her wrong. But since I don"t, there"s no point thinking about it! Why, then, wouldn"t his mind give him some peace?
The truth was he missed her. And he couldn"t stop thinking about the kisses they"d shared. His body ached at the mere thought of holding her close. He clenched his jaw.
She refused my proposal. She doesn"t want me and there"s an end to it.
He sincerely hoped going to the Baltic would keep him very busy indeed.
"Do stop dawdling, girl. I haven"t all day, you know."
"Coming, Aunt Hesketh." Midori followed her aunt into the house, weighed down by the load of produce they had been to buy at the market, while inwardly seething. She wasn"t used to being someone else"s beast of burden and the humid late September weather hadn"t made her task any easier. Not that she would receive any thanks for her efforts. Will anything I do ever find favour with this implacable aunt? The very sight of Midori seemed to anger the woman, and nothing could be done to change that state of affairs, apparently. So much for treating me well, as Nico asked her to do. Nico ... No, I mustn"t think of him, he"s gone. But for some reason her mind refused to follow this order.
"I"m going to lie down for a while. This heat is unbearable," Aunt Hesketh declared. Halfway up the stairs she turned back towards Midori. "Well, don"t just stand there, take our purchases to the kitchen before they, too, wilt."
Midori hurried to do her bidding, if only to get out of the woman"s sight. She shook her head. What reason could her aunt possibly have for treating her so badly?
The kitchen contained only her other aunt, and Midori realised that here was a rare opportunity to find out some answers.
"Aunt Marston, I wonder if I could have a word with you, please?" she said, while piling all the parcels on to the table.
"Yes, of course, my dear. What is it?" Aunt Marston looked a bit like a frightened rabbit, nervously twitching when flushed from its bolt-hole. She always seemed on edge, which was no wonder with a sister-in-law like Aunt Hesketh, Midori thought.
"Uncle Marston said Mr Hesketh was the man my mother was supposed to have married, the reason she ran away, in fact. Can you tell me what happened, please? Why did my aunt end up with him when she was supposed to have married another?"
"Er, well, all I know is Kate was forced to accept Hesketh. There were certain circ.u.mstances, and ... Your grandfather had already signed a marriage contract with him, and as the man was willing to take either daughter ... Well, your grandfather could be rather forceful when he chose to be." Aunt Marston shivered slightly, as if a memory of the old man scared her. She fiddled with her ap.r.o.n strings. "Was that all? I have a lot to attend to this morning, so if you"ll excuse me?"
"Just one more thing, if you please. I don"t quite understand the enmity Aunt Hesketh seems to harbour towards me. Nothing I do ever pleases her and I"m trying my hardest, really I am."
Aunt Marston blanched and gripped the edge of the kitchen table for support. Her eyes darted around as if seeking sanctuary from Midori"s questions. "Well, there was some friction between her and your mother, and perhaps you remind her of Hannah, sometimes. I"m sure that if she"s a little harsh, it"s just her way."
Midori could see Aunt Marston was extremely uncomfortable and since she liked her, she didn"t want to cause her pain.
"Very well. Thank you for answering my queries, Aunt. It"s very kind of you."
Aunt Marston fled without another word and Midori was left to wonder what exactly had happened between her mother and Aunt Hesketh.
I guess I"ll never know.
Nico stood by the railing of his ship as it slowly eased away from Amsterdam and headed northwards. The temptation to turn its bow in a southerly direction instead was great, but he knew it was pointless going back to Plymouth. Even if he went there, he wouldn"t be welcomed by anyone, least of all Midori.
"Argh!" He gritted his teeth and gripped the wooden railing hard. Why can"t I stop thinking about her? It wasn"t as if he"d wanted to marry anyone in any case. Marriage was a burden, it tied you down, gave you responsibilities. And he wanted to be free. Didn"t he?
He watched the city disappear, to be replaced by flat coastline, and felt a great relief wash over him. Whenever he went to sea, the sense of freedom released the tension he always felt on land. For the next couple of months he"d be too busy to think about anything other than sailing and trade. At least, he sincerely hoped so.
"And when I return, perhaps I"ll be sent on another journey to the Far East," he muttered to himself.
The thought should have filled him with joy, since he knew he"d stand to gain from it enormously, but somehow he couldn"t muster up much enthusiasm. It won"t be the same without Midori. All those long months at sea with no one to talk to. He swore softly and turned from the railing, walking abruptly towards the cabin.
"I"ve never been lonely before." He had to conquer those thoughts, once and for all, and accept that Midori was not for him. She"d refused his offer, and that was it.
You didn"t exactly pick the best way of asking her, a little voice inside his head needled. He had to acknowledge the truth of that. In fact, once he was back in Plymouth he"d reverted to his old self, almost as if he"d been transported to his teenage years once again. He"d been boorish and grumpy, not to mention presumptuous in trying to persuade her with that kiss. Was it any wonder Midori turned me down?
Most women wanted to be flattered and cajoled. He"d thought Midori was different, but perhaps not as different as all that, deep down? Either way, there was nothing he could do about it now.
He took a deep breath and picked up his compa.s.s, then went to find the first mate to check on their course.
October 1642 After two months in the Marston household, Midori was beginning to feel a sense of belonging. There were still many things that seemed strange to her, but apart from Aunt Hesketh, the others all made her feel welcome. This was exactly what she"d hoped for, which was why she wasn"t best pleased at the thought that her newfound clan might be threatened by the possibility of an impending war.
Although no one seemed to know for certain how serious the conflict was, there were rumours flying around each day. Midori kept her ears open and at the beginning of October she found that she wasn"t the only one.
"I heard today they were asking for volunteers to go with the army to Dorset." Daniel, who"d been picking at his food that day, pushed away his plate, giving up the pretence of eating.
Midori was surprised. Even at the age of eighteen, he was still fairly shy and rarely spoke, but she knew him to be sensible and intelligent. He"d obviously thought long and hard before raising this topic.
"What nonsense," her uncle growled. "There"s no need for any armies. This silly dispute will be settled soon."
"I believe you"re wrong, Father. I"ve been listening, and there"s definitely a war coming. Why else would they be recruiting men? Almost everyone here in Plymouth is opposed to King Charles and it"s our duty to stand against him, surely?"
"The argument between the King and Parliament will be resolved without any fighting, I tell you." Her uncle stared at his son, as if daring him to argue further.
Daniel"s mouth set in a mulish line. "War will come, I"m certain of it, and-"
"Enough!" Uncle Marston"s fist came crashing down on to the table, sending his knife spiralling to the floor with a clatter. An uneasy silence descended on the table while the two of them glared at each other for what seemed an age. Finally, Daniel averted his gaze, capitulating, and his father picked up his ale.
"There will be no war," was his final p.r.o.nunciation before he thumped down his tankard and declared the meal finished.
Midori hoped he was right.
But Uncle Marston was forced to eat his words, at least in part.
"Have you heard that the whole of Cornwall has been secured for the King by Sir Ralph Hopton?" Daniel ventured to ask a few days later. "It"s likely we"ll soon come under attack, too."
"I doubt it." Her uncle sent his son a quelling look, but Daniel ignored it, obviously too full of news to be stopped.
"Ten thousand Cornishmen have risen in support of the King, I was told," Daniel reported. "Just think on it! They"re bound to come our way."
"Rubbish!"
Her uncle was adamant, but as a stream of Cornish refugees, supporters of Parliament, started to cross the Tamar in their search for a safe haven, it became more and more difficult for him or anyone else to ignore the situation. The Corporation of the City of Plymouth began to raise money in order to construct fortifications around the northern part of the town.
"Proves that at least they take the threat of war seriously," Daniel murmured out of earshot of his father, who was incensed because a rate was levied and everyone had to pay their share.
The mayor of Plymouth, Philip Francis, was unequivocally on the side of Parliament, and any Royalists still remaining in the town were arrested. None of this helped in any way to sweeten her uncle"s temper, which had been simmering since Daniel had first raised the subject. He handed over his money to the Corporation very reluctantly. "The futility of all this effort, honestly," he grumbled.
Nonetheless, Midori noticed he kept an eye on all the various defensive activities going on in and around the town.
"Everyone has been asked to help if they can," he informed them. Grudgingly he had to spare first Daniel, then Midori and finally Temperance and two of the servants as well, to a.s.sist with the building of crude earthworks at strategic points. Even small children had to help to the best of their ability, fetching and carrying whatever they could manage.
"You don"t mind all this manual labour, Cousin?" Daniel asked Midori as they worked side by side, their breath emerging as puffs of steam in the cold autumn air. His cheeks had a slightly pink tinge to them, as if he wasn"t used to talking to girls, but Midori pretended she didn"t notice.
"No, quite the opposite, in fact." She paused to wipe her brow on her sleeve and smiled at him to put him at ease. "I like physical activity and to tell you the truth," she lowered her voice slightly, "it"s wonderful to have this freedom and be away from the house for a while." Daniel stopped shovelling and stared at her, so she quickly added, "I mean no disrespect, it"s just that I"m not really used to the life here yet."
"No, no, please don"t feel you have to apologise," Daniel cut in. "I can understand how difficult it must be for you, coming from such a different background. All the restrictions can become a bit wearisome for us, too," he admitted, "although please don"t ever tell Father I said that."
Midori laughed. "I"m glad you"re not offended. And of course I won"t tell him."
Digging dirt was infinitely preferable to the monotony of her days in the Marston household and the hard work dispersed some of her pent-up frustration. Labouring next to Daniel helped her to get to know him better, which was a bonus. It also kept her well away from Aunt Hesketh, who had stopped criticising everything Midori did, but instead glared darkly at her whenever they were in the same room.
"I don"t understand why she"s so hostile to me," she commented to her cousins.
"Oh, she"s just a grumpy old lady," Temperance replied, but Midori wasn"t convinced. It seemed more personal, somehow.
"Well, I find it very tedious."