"Have you ever wanted to kill any one with your bare hands?"
"Oh, Mr. Dale, you--you amaze me. No!... No!"
"I reckon I know your answer to my last question, but I"ll ask it, anyhow.... Have you ever been so madly in love with a man that you could not live without him?"
Bo fell off her seat with a high, trilling laugh. "Oh, you two are great!"
"Thank Heaven, I haven"t been," replied Helen, shortly.
"Then you don"t know anythin" about life," declared Dale, with finality.
Helen was not to be put down by that, dubious and troubled as it made her.
"Have you experienced all those things?" she queried, stubbornly.
"All but the last one. Love never came my way. How could it? I live alone. I seldom go to the villages where there are girls. No girl would ever care for me. I have nothin".... But, all the same, I understand love a little, just by comparison with strong feelin"s I"ve lived."
Helen watched the hunter and marveled at his simplicity. His sad and penetrating gaze was on the fire, as if in its white heart to read the secret denied him. He had said that no girl would ever love him. She imagined he might know considerably less about the nature of girls than of the forest.
"To come back to myself," said Helen, wanting to continue the argument.
"You declared I didn"t know myself. That I would have no self-control. I will!"
"I meant the big things of life," he said, patiently.
"What things?"
"I told you. By askin" what had never happened to you I learned what will happen."
"Those experiences to come to ME!" breathed Helen, incredulously.
"Never!"
"Sister Nell, they sure will--particularly the last-named one--the mad love," chimed in Bo, mischievously, yet believingly.
Neither Dale nor Helen appeared to hear her interruption.
"Let me put it simpler," began Dale, evidently racking his brain for a.n.a.logy. His perplexity appeared painful to him, because he had a great faith, a great conviction that he could not make clear. "Here I am, the natural physical man, livin" in the wilds. An" here you come, the complex, intellectual woman. Remember, for my argument"s sake, that you"re here. An" suppose circ.u.mstances forced you to stay here. You"d fight the elements with me an" work with me to sustain life. There must be a great change in either you or me, accordin" to the other"s influence. An" can"t you see that change must come in you, not because of anythin" superior in me--I"m really inferior to you--but because of our environment? You"d lose your complexity. An" in years to come you"d be a natural physical woman, because you"d live through an" by the physical."
"Oh dear, will not education be of help to the Western woman?" queried Helen, almost in despair.
"Sure it will," answered Dale, promptly. "What the West needs is women who can raise an" teach children. But you don"t understand me. You don"t get under your skin. I reckon I can"t make you see my argument as I feel it. You take my word for this, though. Sooner or later you WILL wake up an" forget yourself. Remember."
"Nell, I"ll bet you do, too," said Bo, seriously for her. "It may seem strange to you, but I understand Dale. I feel what he means. It"s a sort of shock. Nell, we"re not what we seem. We"re not what we fondly imagine we are. We"ve lived too long with people--too far away from the earth.
You know the Bible says something like this: "Dust thou art and to dust thou shalt return." Where DO we come from?"
CHAPTER XII
Days pa.s.sed.
Every morning Helen awoke with a wondering question as to what this day would bring forth, especially with regard to possible news from her uncle. It must come sometime and she was anxious for it. Something about this simple, wild camp life had begun to grip her. She found herself shirking daily attention to the clothes she had brought West. They needed it, but she had begun to see how superficial they really were.
On the other hand, camp-fire tasks had come to be a pleasure. She had learned a great deal more about them than had Bo. Worry and dread were always impinging upon the fringe of her thoughts--always vaguely present, though seldom annoying. They were like shadows in dreams. She wanted to get to her uncle"s ranch, to take up the duties of her new life. But she was not prepared to believe she would not regret this wild experience. She must get away from that in order to see it clearly, and she began to have doubts of herself.
Meanwhile the active and restful outdoor life went on. Bo leaned more and more toward utter reconciliation to it. Her eyes had a wonderful flash, like blue lightning; her cheeks were gold and brown; her hands tanned dark as an Indian"s.
She could vault upon the gray mustang, or, for that matter, clear over his back. She learned to shoot a rifle accurately enough to win Dale"s praise, and vowed she would like to draw a bead upon a grizzly bear or upon Snake Anson.
"Bo, if you met that grizzly Dale said has been prowling round camp lately you"d run right up a tree," declared Helen, one morning, when Bo seemed particularly boastful.
"Don"t fool yourself," retorted Bo.
"But I"ve seen you run from a mouse!"
"Sister, couldn"t I be afraid of a mouse and not a bear?"
"I don"t see how."
"Well, bears, lions, outlaws, and other wild beasts are to be met with here in the West, and my mind"s made up," said Bo, in slow-nodding deliberation.
They argued as they had always argued, Helen for reason and common sense and restraint, Bo on the principle that if she must fight it was better to get in the first blow.
The morning on which this argument took place Dale was a long time in catching the horses. When he did come in he shook his head seriously.
"Some varmint"s been chasin" the horses," he said, as he reached for his saddle. "Did you hear them snortin" an" runnin" last night?"
Neither of the girls had been awakened.
"I missed one of the colts," went on Dale, "an" I"m goin" to ride across the park."
Dale"s movements were quick and stern. It was significant that he chose his heavier rifle, and, mounting, with a sharp call to Pedro, he rode off without another word to the girls.
Bo watched him for a moment and then began to saddle the mustang.
"You won"t follow him?" asked Helen, quickly.
"I sure will," replied Bo. "He didn"t forbid it."
"But he certainly did not want us."
"He might not want you, but I"ll bet he wouldn"t object to me, whatever"s up," said Bo, shortly.
"Oh! So you think--" exclaimed Helen, keenly hurt. She bit her tongue to keep back a hot reply. And it was certain that a bursting gush of anger flooded over her. Was she, then, such a coward? Did Dale think this slip of a sister, so wild and wilful, was a stronger woman than she? A moment"s silent strife convinced her that no doubt he thought so and no doubt he was right. Then the anger centered upon herself, and Helen neither understood nor trusted herself.
The outcome proved an uncontrollable impulse. Helen began to saddle her horse. She had the task half accomplished when Bo"s call made her look up.
"Listen!"
Helen heard a ringing, wild bay of the hound.