The Melting-Pot

Chapter 26

I vill not meet a Jew, I tell you.

PAPPELMEISTER But you vill vant to talk to your fader, and all _I_ vant is Mr.

Quixano"s address. De Irish maiden at de house says de bird is flown.

VERA [_Gravely_]

I don"t know if I ought to tell you where the new nest is----

PAPPELMEISTER [_Disappointed_]

_Ach!_

VERA [_Smiling_]

But I will produce the bird.

PAPPELMEISTER [_Looks round_]

You vill broduce Mr. Quixano?

VERA [_Merrily_]

By clapping my hands.

[_Mysteriously_]

I am a magician.

BARON [_Whose eyes have been glued on VERA_]

You are, indeed! I don"t know how you have bewitched me.

[_The BARONESS glares at him._]

VERA Dear little father!

[_She crosses to him and strokes his hair._]

Herr Pappelmeister, tell father about Mr. Quixano"s music.

PAPPELMEISTER [_Shaking his head_]

Music cannot be talked about.

VERA [_Smiling_]

That"s a nasty one for the critics. But tell father what a genius Da--Mr. Quixano is.

BARONESS [_Desperately intervening_]

Good-bye, Vera.

[_She thrusts out her hand, which VERA takes._]

I have a headache. You muz excuse me. Herr Pappelmeister, _au plaisir de vous revoir_.

[_PAPPELMEISTER hastens to the door, which he holds open. The BARONESS turns and glares at the BARON._]

BARON [_Agitated_]

Let me see you to the auto----

BARONESS You could see me to ze hotel almost as quick.

BARON [_To VERA_]

I won"t say good-bye, _Verotschka_--I shall be back.

[_He goes toward the hall, then turns._]

You will keep your Rubinstein waiting?

[_VERA smiles lovingly._]

BARONESS You are keeping _me_ vaiting.

[_He turns quickly. Exeunt BARON and BARONESS._]

PAPPELMEISTER And now broduce Mr. Quixano!

VERA Not so fast. What are you going to do with him?

PAPPELMEISTER Put him in my orchestra!

VERA [_Ecstatic_]

Oh, you dear!

[_Then her tone changes to disappointment._]

But he won"t go into Mr. Davenport"s orchestra.

PAPPELMEISTER It is no more Mr. Davenport"s orchestra. He fired me, don"t you remember? Now I boss--how say you in American?

VERA [_Smiling_]

Your own show.

PAPPELMEISTER _Ja_, my own band. Ven I left dat comic opera millionaire, dey all shtick to me almost to von man.

VERA How nice of them!

PAPPELMEISTER All egsept de Christian--he vas de von man. He shtick to de millionaire.

So I lose my brinc.i.p.al first violin.

VERA And Mr. Quixano is to--oh, how delightful!

[_She claps her hands girlishly._]

PAPPELMEISTER [_Looks round mischievously_]

_Ach_, de magic failed.

VERA [_Puzzled_]

Eh!

PAPPELMEISTER You do not broduce him. You clap de hands--but you do not broduce him.

Ha! Ha! Ha!

[_He breaks into a great roar of genial laughter._]

VERA [_Chiming in merrily_]

Ha! Ha! Ha! But I said I have to know everything first. Will he get a good salary?

PAPPELMEISTER Enough to keep a vife and eight children!

VERA [_Blushing_]

But he hasn"t a----

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