SCENE I. _A field near Frogmore._
_Enter SIR HUGH EVANS and SIMPLE._
_Evans._ I pray you now, good Master Slender"s serving-man, and friend Simple by your name, which way have you looked for Master Caius, that calls himself doctor of physic?
_Sim._ Marry, sir, the pittie-ward, the park-ward, every 5 way; old Windsor way, and every way but the town way.
_Evans._ I most fehemently desire you you will also look that way.
_Sim._ I will, sir. [_Exit._
_Evans._ Pless my soul, how full of chollors I am, and 10 trempling of mind!--I shall be glad if he have deceived me. --How melancholies I am!--I will knog his urinals about his knave"s costard when I have goot opportunities for the ork. --Pless my soul!-- [_Sings._
To shallow rivers, to whose falls 15 Melodious birds sings madrigals; There will we make our peds of roses, And a thousand fragrant posies.
To shallow--
Mercy on me! I have a great dispositions to cry. [_Sings._ 20
Melodious birds sing madrigals-- Whenas I sat in Pabylon-- And a thousand vagram posies.
To shallow &c.
_Re-enter SIMPLE._
_Sim._ Yonder he is coming, this way, Sir Hugh. 25
_Evans._ He"s welcome. -- [_Sings._
To shallow rivers, to whose falls--
Heaven prosper the right!--What weapons is he?
_Sim._ No weapons, sir. There comes my master, Master Shallow, and another gentleman, from Frogmore, 30 over the stile, this way.
_Evans._ Pray you, give me my gown; or else keep it in your arms.
_Enter PAGE, SHALLOW, and SLENDER._
_Shal._ How now, master parson! Good morrow, good Sir Hugh. Keep a gamester from the dice, and a good 35 student from his book, and it is wonderful.
_Slen._ [_Aside_] Ah, sweet Anne Page!
_Page._ Save you, good Sir Hugh!
_Evans._ Pless you from his mercy sake, all of you!
_Shal._ What, the sword and the word! do you study 40 them both, master parson?
_Page._ And youthful still! in your doublet and hose this raw rheumatic day!
_Evans._ There is reasons and causes for it.
_Page._ We are come to you to do a good office, master 45 parson.
_Evans._ Fery well: what is it?
_Page._ Yonder is a most reverend gentleman, who, belike having received wrong by some person, is at most odds with his own gravity and patience that ever you saw. 50
_Shal._ I have lived fourscore years and upward; I never heard a man of his place, gravity, and learning, so wide of his own respect.
_Evans._ What is he?
_Page._ I think you know him; Master Doctor Caius, 55 the renowned French physician.
_Evans._ Got"s will, and his pa.s.sion of my heart! I had as lief you would tell me of a mess of porridge.
_Page._ Why?
_Evans._ He has no more knowledge in Hibocrates and 60 Galen,--and he is a knave besides; a cowardly knave as you would desires to be acquainted withal.
_Page._ I warrant you, he"s the man should fight with him.
_Slen._ [_Aside_] O sweet Anne Page! 65
_Shal._ It appears so, by his weapons. Keep them asunder: here comes Doctor Caius.
_Enter HOST, CAIUS, and RUGBY._
_Page._ Nay, good master parson, keep in your weapon.
_Shal._ So do you, good master doctor.
_Host._ Disarm them, and let them question: let them 70 keep their limbs whole, and hack our English.
_Caius._ I pray you, let-a me speak a word with your ear. Verefore vill you not meet-a me?
_Evans._ [_Aside to Caius_] Pray you, use your patience: in good time. 75
_Caius._ By gar, you are de coward, de Jack dog, John ape.
_Evans._ [_Aside to Caius_] Pray you, let us not be laughing-stocks to other men"s humours; I desire you in friendship, and I will one way or other make you amends. 80 [_Aloud_] I will knog your urinals about your knave"s cogs...o...b..[for missing your meetings and appointments].
_Caius._ Diable!--Jack Rugby,--mine host de Jarteer,--have I not stay for him to kill him? have I not, at de place I did appoint? 85
_Evans._ As I am a Christians soul, now, look you, this is the place appointed: I"ll be judgement by mine host of the Garter.
_Host._ Peace, I say, Gallia and Gaul, French and Welsh, soul-curer and body-curer! 90
_Caius._ Ay, dat is very good; excellent.