_Host._ Peace, I say! hear mine host of the Garter. Am I politic? am I subtle? am I a Machiavel? Shall I lose my doctor? no; he gives me the potions and the motions.
Shall I lose my parson, my priest, my Sir Hugh? no; he 95 gives me the proverbs and the no-verbs. [Give me thy hand, terrestrial; so.] Give me thy hand, celestial; so.
Boys of art, I have deceived you both; I have directed you to wrong places: your hearts are mighty, your skins are whole, and let burnt sack be the issue. Come, lay their 100 swords to p.a.w.n. Follow me, lads of peace; follow, follow, follow.
_Shal._ Trust me, a mad host. Follow, gentlemen, follow.
_Slen._ [_Aside_] O sweet Anne Page!
[_Exeunt Shal., Slen., Page, and Host._ 105
_Caius._ Ha, do I perceive dat? have you make-a de sot of us, ha, ha?
_Evans._ This is well; he has made us his vlouting-stog. --I desire you that we may be friends; and let us knog our prains together to be revenge on this same scall, scurvy, 110 cogging companion, the host of the Garter.
_Caius._ By gar, with all my heart. He promise to bring me where is Anne Page; by gar, he deceive me too.
_Evans._ Well, I will smite his noddles. Pray you, follow. [_Exeunt._ 115
NOTES: III, 1
5: _pittie-ward_] F1 Q3. _pitty-wary_ F2 F3 F4. _city-ward_ Capell.
_pit way_ Collier MS.
_the park-ward_] _the park way_ Collier MS.
7: _also_] om. Q3.
10: _chollors_] F1 Q3 F2. _chollars_ F3 F4.
14: _sings_] Ff. _sing_ Q3.
15, 19, 24, 27: _To shallow_] (Q1 Q2) Ff Q3. _By shallow_ Theobald.
18: _fragrant_] (Q1 Q2) Ff. _vagram_ Q3. _vragrant_ Hanmer.
_vagrant_ Johnson.
20: _dispositions_] F1 Q3. _disposition_ F2 F3 F4.
21: _madrigals_] _madrigall_ F2 F3 F4.
23: _vagram_] Ff Q3. _vagrant_ Pope. _vragant_ Hanmer. _vagrant_ Johnson.
27: _to whose_] _in whose_ Q3.
34: SCENE II. Pope.
36: _student_] F3 F4. _studient_ F1 Q3 F2.
37, 65, 105: [Aside] Edd.
62: _desires_] F1 Q3. _desire_ F2 F3 F4.
66: SCENE III. Pope.
68: _in_] om. Q3.
74: [Aside...] Edd. See note (VII).
78: [Aside...] Staunton.
_Pray you_] _I pray you_ Q3.
_laughing-stocks_] _laughing stogs_ J. rec. Edd.
81: [Aloud] Staunton.
_your_] _your your_ F4. _you your_ Rowe.
_urinals_] (Q1 Q2) Capell. _urinal_] Ff Q3.
82: [_for ... appointments_] Pope (from Q1 Q2). om. Ff Q3.
89: _Gallia and Gaul_] F3 F4. _Gallia and Gaule_ F1 Q3 F2.
_Gawle and Gawlia_ (Q1 Q2). _Gallia and Wallia_ Halliwell MS. Hanmer. _Guallia and Gaul_ Malone (Farmer conj.). _Gallia and Guallia_ Collier (Farmer MS. conj.).
95: _lose my parson, my priest_] _lose my Priest_ Pope.
96: [_Give me thy hand, terrestrial; so_] Theobald (from Q1 Q2).
om. Ff Q3. _Give me thy hands, celestial and terrestrial; so._ Collier MS.
101: _lads_] (Q1 Q2) Warburton. _lad_ Ff Q3.
108: _vlouting-stog_] _vlouting-stock_ Pope.
110: _scall_] _scald_ Pope. _Scal"_ Capell.
112: _with_] _vith_ Hanmer. _vit_ rec. Capell.
113: _where_] _vhere_ Pope. _ver_ Hanmer. _vere_ rec. Capell.
SCENE II. _The street, in Windsor._
_Enter MISTRESS PAGE and ROBIN._
_Mrs Page._ Nay, keep your way, little gallant; you were wont to be a follower, but now you are a leader. Whether had you rather lead mine eyes, or eye your master"s heels?
_Rob._ I had rather, forsooth, go before you like a man than follow him like a dwarf. 5
_Mrs Page._ O, you are a flattering boy: now I see you"ll be a courtier.
_Enter FORD._
_Ford._ Well met, Mistress Page. Whither go you?
_Mrs Page._ Truly, sir, to see your wife. Is she at home?
_Ford._ Ay; and as idle as she may hang together, for 10 want of company. I think, if your husbands were dead, you two would marry.
_Mrs Page._ Be sure of that,--two other husbands.
_Ford._ Where had you this pretty weatherc.o.c.k?
_Mrs Page._ I cannot tell what the d.i.c.kens his name is 15 husband had him of. --What do you call your knight"s name, sirrah?
_Rob._ Sir John Falstaff.
_Ford._ Sir John Falstaff!
_Mrs Page._ He, he; I can never hit on"s name. There 20 is such a league between my good man and he!--Is your wife at home indeed?
_Ford._ Indeed she is.
_Mrs Page._ By your leave, sir: I am sick till I see her.
[_Exeunt Mrs Page and Robin._
_Ford._ Has Page any brains? hath he any eyes? hath 25 he any thinking? Sure, they sleep; he hath no use of them.
Why, this boy will carry a letter twenty mile, as easy as a cannon will shoot point-blank twelve score. He pieces out his wife"s inclination; he gives her folly motion and advantage: and now she"s going to my wife, and Falstaff"s boy 30 with her. A man may hear this shower sing in the wind.
And Falstaff"s boy with her! Good plots, they are laid; and our revolted wives share d.a.m.nation together. Well; I will take him, then torture my wife, pluck the borrowed veil of modesty from the so seeming Mistress Page, divulge 35 Page himself for a secure and wilful Actaeon; and to these violent proceedings all my neighbours shall cry aim. [_Clock heard._] The clock gives me my cue, and my a.s.surance bids me search: there I shall find Falstaff: I shall be rather praised for this than mocked; for it is as positive as the 40 earth is firm that Falstaff is there: I will go.