"No, it"s not that," said Kit hesitating, "it"s something very different from that. I haven"t got much sense, I know, but if he could be brought to believe that I"d been a faithful servant to him, doing the best I could, and never meaning harm, perhaps he mightn"t--"
Here Kit faltered so long that the child entreated him to speak out, and quickly, for it was very late, and time to shut the window.
"Perhaps he mightn"t think it over venturesome of me to say--well then, to say this," cried Kit with sudden boldness. "This home is gone from you and him. Mother and I have got a poor one, but that"s better than this with all these people here; and why not come there, till he"s had time to look about, and find a better!"
The child did not speak. Kit, in the relief of having made his proposition, found his tongue loosened, and spoke out in its favour with his utmost eloquence.
"You think," said the boy, "that it"s very small and inconvenient. So it is, but it"s very clean. Perhaps you think it would be noisy, but there"s not a quieter court than ours in all the town. Don"t be afraid of the children; the baby hardly ever cries, and the other one is very good--besides, I"d mind "em. They wouldn"t vex you much, I"m sure. Do try, Miss Nell, do try. The little front room up stairs is very pleasant. You can see a piece of the church-clock, through the chimneys, and almost tell the time; mother says it would be just the thing for you, and so it would, and you"d have her to wait upon you both, and me to run of errands. We don"t mean money, bless you; you"re not to think of that! Will you try him, Miss Nell? Only say you"ll try him. Do try to make old master come, and ask him first what I have done. Will you only promise that, Miss Nell?"
Before the child could reply to this earnest solicitation, the street-door opened, and Mr Bra.s.s thrusting out his night-capped head called in a surly voice, "Who"s there!" Kit immediately glided away, and Nell, closing the window softly, drew back into the room.
Before Mr Bra.s.s had repeated his inquiry many times, Mr Quilp, also embellished with a night-cap, emerged from the same door and looked carefully up and down the street, and up at all the windows of the house, from the opposite side. Finding that there was n.o.body in sight, he presently returned into the house with his legal friend, protesting (as the child heard from the staircase), that there was a league and plot against him; that he was in danger of being robbed and plundered by a band of conspirators who prowled about the house at all seasons; and that he would delay no longer but take immediate steps for disposing of the property and returning to his own peaceful roof.
Having growled forth these, and a great many other threats of the same nature, he coiled himself once more in the child"s little bed, and Nell crept softly up the stairs.
It was natural enough that her short and unfinished dialogue with Kit should leave a strong impression on her mind, and influence her dreams that night and her recollections for a long, long time. Surrounded by unfeeling creditors, and mercenary attendants upon the sick, and meeting in the height of her anxiety and sorrow with little regard or sympathy even from the women about her, it is not surprising that the affectionate heart of the child should have been touched to the quick by one kind and generous spirit, however uncouth the temple in which it dwelt. Thank Heaven that the temples of such spirits are not made with hands, and that they may be even more worthily hung with poor patch-work than with purple and fine linen!
CHAPTER 12
At length, the crisis of the old man"s disorder was past, and he began to mend. By very slow and feeble degrees his consciousness came back; but the mind was weakened and its functions were impaired. He was patient, and quiet; often sat brooding, but not despondently, for a long s.p.a.ce; was easily amused, even by a sun-beam on the wall or ceiling; made no complaint that the days were long, or the nights tedious; and appeared indeed to have lost all count of time, and every sense of care or weariness. He would sit, for hours together, with Nell"s small hand in his, playing with the fingers and stopping sometimes to smooth her hair or kiss her brow; and, when he saw that tears were glistening in her eyes, would look, amazed, about him for the cause, and forget his wonder even while he looked.
The child and he rode out; the old man propped up with pillows, and the child beside him. They were hand in hand as usual. The noise and motion in the streets fatigued his brain at first, but he was not surprised, or curious, or pleased, or irritated. He was asked if he remembered this, or that. "O yes," he said, "quite well--why not?"
Sometimes he turned his head, and looked, with earnest gaze and outstretched neck, after some stranger in the crowd, until he disappeared from sight; but, to the question why he did this, he answered not a word.
He was sitting in his easy chair one day, and Nell upon a stool beside him, when a man outside the door inquired if he might enter. "Yes," he said without emotion, "it was Quilp, he knew. Quilp was master there.
Of course he might come in." And so he did.
"I"m glad to see you well again at last, neighbour," said the dwarf, sitting down opposite him. "You"re quite strong now?"
"Yes," said the old man feebly, "yes."
"I don"t want to hurry you, you know, neighbour," said the dwarf, raising his voice, for the old man"s senses were duller than they had been; "but, as soon as you can arrange your future proceedings, the better."
"Surely," said the old man. "The better for all parties."
"You see," pursued Quilp after a short pause, "the goods being once removed, this house would be uncomfortable; uninhabitable in fact."
"You say true," returned the old man. "Poor Nell too, what would she do?"
"Exactly," bawled the dwarf nodding his head; "that"s very well observed. Then will you consider about it, neighbour?"
"I will, certainly," replied the old man. "We shall not stop here."
"So I supposed," said the dwarf. "I have sold the things. They have not yielded quite as much as they might have done, but pretty well--pretty well. To-day"s Tuesday. When shall they be moved?
There"s no hurry--shall we say this afternoon?"
"Say Friday morning," returned the old man.
"Very good," said the dwarf. "So be it--with the understanding that I can"t go beyond that day, neighbour, on any account."
"Good," returned the old man. "I shall remember it."
Mr Quilp seemed rather puzzled by the strange, even spiritless way in which all this was said; but as the old man nodded his head and repeated "on Friday morning. I shall remember it," he had no excuse for dwelling on the subject any further, and so took a friendly leave with many expressions of good-will and many compliments to his friend on his looking so remarkably well; and went below stairs to report progress to Mr Bra.s.s.
All that day, and all the next, the old man remained in this state. He wandered up and down the house and into and out of the various rooms, as if with some vague intent of bidding them adieu, but he referred neither by direct allusions nor in any other manner to the interview of the morning or the necessity of finding some other shelter. An indistinct idea he had, that the child was desolate and in want of help; for he often drew her to his bosom and bade her be of good cheer, saying that they would not desert each other; but he seemed unable to contemplate their real position more distinctly, and was still the listless, pa.s.sionless creature that suffering of mind and body had left him.
We call this a state of childishness, but it is the same poor hollow mockery of it, that death is of sleep. Where, in the dull eyes of doating men, are the laughing light and life of childhood, the gaiety that has known no check, the frankness that has felt no chill, the hope that has never withered, the joys that fade in blossoming? Where, in the sharp lineaments of rigid and unsightly death, is the calm beauty of slumber, telling of rest for the waking hours that are past, and gentle hopes and loves for those which are to come? Lay death and sleep down, side by side, and say who shall find the two akin. Send forth the child and childish man together, and blush for the pride that libels our own old happy state, and gives its t.i.tle to an ugly and distorted image.
Thursday arrived, and there was no alteration in the old man. But a change came upon him that evening as he and the child sat silently together.
In a small dull yard below his window, there was a tree--green and flourishing enough, for such a place--and as the air stirred among its leaves, it threw a rippling shadow on the white wall. The old man sat watching the shadows as they trembled in this patch of light, until the sun went down; and when it was night, and the moon was slowly rising, he still sat in the same spot.
To one who had been tossing on a restless bed so long, even these few green leaves and this tranquil light, although it languished among chimneys and house-tops, were pleasant things. They suggested quiet places afar off, and rest, and peace. The child thought, more than once that he was moved: and had forborne to speak. But now he shed tears--tears that it lightened her aching heart to see--and making as though he would fall upon his knees, besought her to forgive him.
"Forgive you--what?" said Nell, interposing to prevent his purpose.
"Oh grandfather, what should I forgive?"
"All that is past, all that has come upon thee, Nell, all that was done in that uneasy dream," returned the old man.
"Do not talk so," said the child. "Pray do not. Let us speak of something else."
"Yes, yes, we will," he rejoined. "And it shall be of what we talked of long ago--many months--months is it, or weeks, or days? which is it Nell?"
"I do not understand you," said the child.
"It has come back upon me to-day, it has all come back since we have been sitting here. I bless thee for it, Nell!"
"For what, dear grandfather?"
"For what you said when we were first made beggars, Nell. Let us speak softly. Hush! for if they knew our purpose down stairs, they would cry that I was mad and take thee from me. We will not stop here another day. We will go far away from here."
"Yes, let us go," said the child earnestly. "Let us begone from this place, and never turn back or think of it again. Let us wander barefoot through the world, rather than linger here."
"We will," answered the old man, "we will travel afoot through the fields and woods, and by the side of rivers, and trust ourselves to G.o.d in the places where He dwells. It is far better to lie down at night beneath an open sky like that yonder--see how bright it is--than to rest in close rooms which are always full of care and weary dreams.
Thou and I together, Nell, may be cheerful and happy yet, and learn to forget this time, as if it had never been."
"We will be happy," cried the child. "We never can be here."
"No, we never can again--never again--that"s truly said," rejoined the old man. "Let us steal away to-morrow morning--early and softly, that we may not be seen or heard--and leave no trace or track for them to follow by. Poor Nell! Thy cheek is pale, and thy eyes are heavy with watching and weeping for me--I know--for me; but thou wilt be well again, and merry too, when we are far away. To-morrow morning, dear, we"ll turn our faces from this scene of sorrow, and be as free and happy as the birds."
And then the old man clasped his hands above her head, and said, in a few broken words, that from that time forth they would wander up and down together, and never part more until Death took one or other of the twain.
The child"s heart beat high with hope and confidence. She had no thought of hunger, or cold, or thirst, or suffering. She saw in this, but a return of the simple pleasures they had once enjoyed, a relief from the gloomy solitude in which she had lived, an escape from the heartless people by whom she had been surrounded in her late time of trial, the restoration of the old man"s health and peace, and a life of tranquil happiness. Sun, and stream, and meadow, and summer days, shone brightly in her view, and there was no dark tint in all the sparkling picture.
The old man had slept, for some hours, soundly in his bed, and she was yet busily engaged in preparing for their flight. There were a few articles of clothing for herself to carry, and a few for him; old garments, such as became their fallen fortunes, laid out to wear; and a staff to support his feeble steps, put ready for his use. But this was not all her task; for now she must visit the old rooms for the last time.