Eloise nearly choked on her bite of goose, then hurried to take a drink. "I"m sorry," she said, realizing that most of the table was watching her. "Did he say Mr. Burke is here?"
"I believe so," Mr. Franklin said, looking at her with concern. "You are acquainted with Mr. Burke, are you not?"
"Yes, I am," Eloise said, trying to gather her wits about her. Mr. Burke? Here? "I just understood that he"d left Hemberg, and I did not expect him to return so soon."
"Neither did I," Mr. Franklin said. "In all honesty, I thought Neville a bit relieved when Mr. Burke left last week, but then I make it a point not to interfere too much in my son"s affairs. He asked to have a place for Mr. Burke at the table before he left to fetch him yesterday, and that was enough for me."
Eloise forced a polite smile as her mind turned new thoughts, round and round enough to make her dizzy. She had asked after Mr. Burke yesterday during Neville"s visit and tried to remember what Neville had asked her-"You are missing him?" That"s what Neville had said, and she had a.s.sured him that she was not missing Mr. Burke. Yet he must have left shortly afterward to bring Mr. Burke back. Why on earth would he do such a thing?
Making sense of the situation was interrupted by the butler introducing Neville and Mr. Burke to the room. Eloise nodded a welcome but could not meet either man"s eye. Was there any way she could leave without being the rudest woman ever to dine at Franklin Farm?
Mr. Burke was seated at Eloise"s left while Neville sat directly across from her. She busied herself with cutting her portion of goose into tiny pieces.
Aunt Hannah picked up her presentation of the Christmas story while Eloise kept her attention trained upon her plate. She was well aware of Mr. Burke beside her but would elbow him in the ribs before she would pretend she was glad to see him. She felt sure she could feel him smirking-what was he about? He knew she didn"t want him here, so why had he come?
Dessert was Christmas pudding, and Aunt Hannah talked of the sweetness of life and the great blessing of redemption ushered in through Christ"s birth. Eloise barely tasted it and hoped G.o.d would forgive her for not giving ample attention to the symbolic meal.
Finally, it was time for the ladies to depart. Eloise was the first out of her chair. She would go into the drawing room and proclaim herself too fatigued to stay. What luck that Aunt Hannah had included the spiritual aspects of the day into dinner so that Eloise would not feel badly for missing the entertainment. Very little about this day, aside from Aunt Hannah"s tribute, had felt like Christmas, and now even the bit of holiday spirit she"d felt had departed. She wished nothing more than to return to her own home and hide beneath the covers.
Eloise had only just stepped back from the table when she noticed the men also preparing to exit the room. Apparently, the men were foregoing the usual round of port before they would join the rest of the company.
Once in the drawing room, the older children helped the younger children hang their stockings for St. Nicholas. Eloise was considering when best to make her excuses when she glanced at Mr. Burke and he winked at her. No, she would not be staying. Very likely she would be forever known as that rude girl in Hemberg who left Christmas dinner early, but she could not abide Mr. Burke"s company for anything.
"I am sorry to cut the evening," Eloise began, drawing her eyes downward to feign discomfort. "But I have not been well this last week, and I do believe it has caught up with me this evening. Thank you for-"
"You can"t leave," Mr. Burke said, raising his eyebrows at her from where he lounged in one of the chairs flanking the fireplace. "What about your Christmas gift?"
At the mention of a gift, the children looked up from their stockings, some hung, some awaiting. Eloise felt her face flush. Had she been used in another one of their games? A quick look at Neville, however, showed that she wasn"t the only one taken off guard by Mr. Burke"s words.
Neville stood, drawing every eye toward him. "Um, Mr. Burke, might I talk to you in private a moment? In the foyer, perhaps."
Mr. Burke waved his hand through the air. "Certainly not," he said as though it were a proclamation. "What you may do is confess your love to this woman once and for all so that I might return to Newport."
Aunt Hannah gasped, one of the children giggled, and Eloise closed her eyes as though she could pretend she were not here. The room fell silent as everyone seemed to wait for someone else to speak. In the silence, however, Mr. Burke"s words lingered-confess your love? Neville?
"Well, let"s get on with it," Mr. Burke said.
Eloise opened her eyes, finally, and looked only at Mr. Burke, wishing she could burn holes through him. She"d had enough embarra.s.sment at his hand and could think of nothing but preventing more. She stood and began toward the door, too humiliated to speak.
"Wait, Eloise."
It was Neville"s voice, but it was not his grip on her arm. She knew that grip and she knew from the placement of the room which man would have reached her soonest. She spun and slapped Mr. Burke as hard as she had hit him that day at Bramble Pond. The impact spurred her rage upward another degree, and when his grip slipped from her arm, she lifted both hands to push hard against his chest, sending him backward into a chair where he flipped heels over head. "I have had enough of you, Mr. Burke, and I will ask you to never set a hand on me again!"
Belatedly, Eloise remembered she was in a room full of people-many of whom were children. Her face flushed as hot as the soup they"d had for dinner, and she tried to sputter an apology when the sound of laughter drew her attention to Mr. Burke pushing himself to his feet. If not for the embarra.s.sment she felt at losing her temper in front of an audience, she"d have marched forward and kicked him in the side to send him down again.
"Oh, yes, Franklin, I think she will do just fine," Mr. Burke said as he got his feet beneath him.
"Shut your mouth, Burke," Neville said, stepping toward the other man with his hands in fists by his sides. "You have said quite enough already. You will apologize to Miss Hallstrom and then kindly remove yourself from this house. I should never have brought you back."
"Remove myself?" Mr. Burke made an exaggerated point of straightening his coat. "But you invited me to come. I am Eloise"s Christmas gift, am I not?"
"You?" Eloise spat and turned to look at Neville, who looked ready to run Mr. Burke through. The children were now gathered together, watching events unfold as though they had never seen anything like this-which they likely had not. What did Mr. Burke mean about being a Christmas gift? And what of Neville confessing his love? She felt small and vulnerable and furious.
"Yes, me," Mr. Burke said, still grinning like an idiot. No one else in the room was grinning. "Franklin told me how you were pining for me and begged me to come back and give you another chance."
Eloise turned shocked eyes to Neville.
"That is not what I said, and this is not how I expected things to come about. I thought . . . I thought he"d broken your heart when he left."
"More like answered my prayers," Eloise countered, yet something was settling into her chest. "Wait, but you thought I cared for Mr. Burke and so you fetched him for me?"
Neville held her eyes a moment, until one of the children said to another, "She loves Mr. Burke?"
Another child answered, "No, she loves Cousin Neville."
Aunt Hannah suddenly came to her feet. "Children, let"s go on to bed now. Come, come."
"But I want to see her hit Mr. Burke again, Mama," one of the children whined.
Aunt Hannah hurried them out of the room, despite their protests of wanting to stay.
"What about our stockings?" one of them said.
"Will St. Nicholas still come?" said another.
Once Aunt Hannah and her brood were gone, Mr. Franklin made up the fourth person in the room. After looking at the other three faces, he nodded slightly. "I think I might enjoy a bit of port, if you don"t mind, and leave you young people to sort this out." He made eye contact with Eloise, however, and smiled. "I shall be only a shout away if either of these men need to be taken to the ground. Are such terms acceptable to you?"
Mr. Franklin was leaving her here? The momentary shock quickly gave way to acceptance and even relief. She and Neville and Mr. Burke would settle things; she would convince them both that she had no interest in Mr. Burke and then she would go home and hope that one day she and Neville might forget any of this had ever happened. "Yes, Mr. Franklin. I shall call if I need you."
"Very good," Mr. Franklin said with a chuckle. "Have at it, you young bloods. Mind that you don"t get any blood on the carpet."
He left the room, and Neville, Eloise, and Mr. Burke looked between one another.
Mr. Burke turned his attention to Neville. "Have you nothing to say?"
Eloise looked at Neville, too, and remembered the accusation Mr. Burke had made earlier-that Neville was in love with her. It couldn"t be true. Mr. Burke was just acting on his broken sense of a joke. Wasn"t he?
"I believe I asked you to leave," Neville said to Mr. Burke. "I have not rescinded that invitation. You have done quite enough."
Mr. Burke shook his head. "If I leave, then this"-he gestured between Eloise and Neville-"might never be resolved. You see, I am this Christmas gift of which Neville promised, but not in the way he expected." The amus.e.m.e.nt had disappeared from his tone, and he looked sincerely at the two of them. "I have some confessions to make, and it is best you both hear it so that nothing gets confused in some future retelling."
Eloise narrowed her eyes at him. Mr. Burke had shown himself not the least bit trustworthy or admirable, and she was not prepared to give him any benefit of the doubt.
"Franklin," Mr. Burke began, turning toward Neville, who still stood with his clenched fists at his side. "I did get a kiss from Miss Hallstrom that day of our ride."
Eloise protested, "Only because-"
"Shh," Mr. Burke said, turning toward her and giving her a sharp look. "You"ll have your opportunity to speak your piece." He turned back to Neville. "I stole that kiss because I was determined to prove myself the better man in a compet.i.tion I knew I was losing."
"There was no wager," Neville said, holding Mr. Burke"s eyes.
Eloise stared at him. No wager?
"Perhaps not, but compet.i.tion all the same. Miss Hallstrom was not a willing partic.i.p.ant in that kiss, and she let me know, with a force quite unexpected, that she was not open to my attention in any way. Tonight was not the first time she has sent me heels over bottom, so I would warn you not to trifle with her in any way. Turns out, all those times I thought she was basking in my company, she did not want me at all. She wanted you."
After all the embarra.s.sment Eloise had suffered these last two weeks, she would have believed she was incapable of feeling more, but hearing her long-hidden feelings proclaimed with such stark rawness was excruciating. She felt Neville look at her and dropped her eyes to the ground she wished would swallow her whole.
"Me?" Neville said. "But you were so hurt that Burke had left Hemberg."
She would not look at him, but neither would she go mute and not speak in her own defense. "I only remarked that he had gone during a conversation that had turned awkward."
"And the wager," Mr. Burke interrupted, drawing both sets of eyes to him. "That is my next confession." He looked squarely at Eloise. "As Franklin said already, there was no wager. I made it up to preserve my pride when I realized you cared for Franklin above me." He shrugged. "Character has never been my strength."
"You made it up?" Eloise said.
"Well, I made that particular wager up," Mr. Burke amended, putting his hands in his pockets and rocking back on his heels. "It is a game we played in London, and I had wanted to resurrect it at the Websters" ball with you as the prize, but Neville wouldn"t have it. I believe his exact words were "No, not here. Not Eloise.""
"It was a childish game even when I partic.i.p.ated," Neville said, his voice quiet. "And I am as ashamed to have been a part of such a thing as I am for you to know it."
"There was no wager set upon me?" Eloise said again. That meant Neville hadn"t used her as a piece in a game.
"No," Neville said, shaking his head. "What you must have thought of me."
"Which leads us to the next topic of discussion," Mr. Burke said, though Eloise continued to hold Neville"s gaze. "Eloise, do you agree that the majority of your memories of Neville until these last few months were from your childhood?"
Eloise nodded, though she didn"t understand the importance of this question.
Mr. Burke nodded and turned his attention to Neville. "And Neville, do you agree that the majority of your memories of Eloise until these last few months were from your childhood?"
"Yes," Neville said, looking as confused as Eloise felt.
"And, generally, do you both agree that men can be thick, cotton-headed idiots, especially in regards to anything of an emotional breadth?"
Neither answered, but Mr. Burke nodded as though they had. "And so, what we have here is Miss Hallstrom, who has been rather besotted with our Mr. Franklin for some time, I believe, and Mr. Franklin, who missed every signal and misinterpreted every attempt she made to get his attention, only to bungle it completely when, in fact, he does find Miss Hallstrom a most entrancing woman-as good a woman as any sorry man could want, if said sorry man could make up for being a dunderhead and, in the process, make everything right."
Eloise was looking at the floor again, repeating in her mind what Mr. Burke said but not having the first clue how she might respond to it. Neville did have feelings for her? That is what Mr. Burke had said, but then Neville hadn"t agreed it was true and- "I think you have said enough, Burke," Neville said in a softened tone, causing Eloise to look up once again to find him watching her. "Might I now ask that you leave us to sort the rest of this out ourselves?"
Mr. Burke let out a dramatic breath. "Well, I suppose you might." He began moving toward the door but then paused. Eloise looked at him. He gave her perhaps the first sincere smile she"d ever seen on that man"s face. "I do hope, in time, that you might forgive me, as I should very much like your respect." He quit the room, and then there were just the two of them.
"Well," Neville said, attempting to put a laugh in his words, which did not translate well.
"Yes," Eloise said, trying to look anywhere but at him. Her gaze caught the fireplace, and she moved toward it, trying to figure out how they would sort out this mess. In the process, she turned her back on Neville and inhaled sharply when he came up behind her-apparently taking the awkwardness in hand directly. He touched her arm, sending a trembling wave of awareness throughout her body.
They stood there, silent but connected, for the s.p.a.ce of two breaths, then Eloise took a step backward, bringing her back against his chest. Hesitantly, he put his arms around her waist, paused, and then rested his chin on her shoulder until she finally relaxed into the embrace and wrapped her arms around his. It felt both strange and perfectly right to hold each other this way, and as the silence stretched on, she felt her fear and frustration and embarra.s.sment melt from her. It was her belief in this very rightness between them that had prompted the red dress she"d worn to the Websters" ball.
"I"m sorry, Eloise," he whispered, moving the soft tendrils of hair by her ear with his breath and causing her own breath to catch. "I"m sorry for being a stupid schoolboy and for bringing Burke back tonight and for not seeing what was right in front of me."
What could she say? And what if she chose the wrong words and broke this tenuous thread between them? She closed her eyes and relaxed into him even more.
"Can I ask you a question?" Neville asked after nearly a minute of silence pa.s.sed.
Eloise nodded, intimately aware of the scent of his cologne, the heat of his chest pressing against her back, and the way being close to him filled her up with light.
"Did you really wear that red dress for my notice?"
She nodded again.
He grunted and shook his head just enough for her to feel the movement against her shoulder. "And then I said what I said. Even now, I can"t fully explain what I felt when I saw you that night-so beautiful, so striking, so . . . different than I had ever seen you before. Can you understand that, Eloise? It was as though my mind had already made its decision about you as a playmate and a friend, and so I was blind to who you are now."
"I can understand that," she said, opening her eyes and staring into the fire.
"And can you forgive me for the things I said?"
Eloise turned in his arms then, but he kept them loose at her waist. "Of course I can forgive you, Neville."
"And can we start anew?" he asked.
"Isn"t that what Christmas is all about?" she asked, c.o.c.king her head to the side. "A season where our hearts are softer and our thoughts are higher?"
"G.o.d and sinners reconciled?" he asked, using the words of the familiar carol.
Eloise laughed, but when she met his eyes again, his face was serious. "I"ve kissed a lot of girls, Eloise, but it was always a game, a lark of young men who haven"t a reasonable thought in their heads. I"m ashamed of ever having been a part of it and a.s.sure you that I am trying very hard to be a better man than the boy I"ve been. Can you believe me when I say that my next kiss will mean more than all of those combined and then some?"
"I don"t know," Eloise said, finding no room for anything but love, adoration, and grat.i.tude in her heart, which felt freer than it ever had before. "Sometimes seeing is believing."
She saw just the first quirk of a smile before he lowered his face and she went up on her toes in response. Their lips met with tenderness. Her arms went around his neck, and his arms around her waist pulled her closer. There was something about this moment that transcended a man and a woman in a parlor on Christmas Eve to include a boy and a girl with muddy feet and smiling faces. They shared history and community, and now they shared something more than the past, more than the present. Now they shared a future, as rich and as beautiful as either could imagine. Full of promise. Br.i.m.m.i.n.g with hope.
When Neville pulled back, he looked at her with pleased surprise. Though she had limited experience, Eloise sensed that he had never been kissed like that before. She reached a hand up to trace the arch of his eyebrows, the bridge of his nose, and the line of his jaw. He was here. Close enough for her to touch and feel and hold. Throughout her inspection, he watched her, and when she smiled, he smiled.
"Happy Christmas, Eloise."
She rose up and kissed him lightly, already imagining a lifetime of Christmas Eve kisses between them. "Happy Christmas, Neville. The happiest, in fact."
Other Works by Josi S. Kilpack:.
Josi S. Kilpack is the author of more than twenty novels, which include women"s fiction, romance, mystery, and suspense. Wedding Cake, the final book in her Sadie Hoffmiller culinary mystery series, was released in December 2014, and her Regency romance novels A Heart Revealed and Lord Fenton"s Folly were released in 2015.
Josi and her husband, Lee, are the parents of four children and live in Northern Utah. In addition to writing, Josi loves to read, bake, and travel. She"s completed six half marathons to date, but may never run another because right now she hates running and does hot yoga instead.
Josi"s website: www.josiskilpack.com.
To my daughter, Sarah, who understands.
Chapter One.