What"s going on?Why can"t I see?
Come to think of it, I can"t even feel my body.
This feeling of emptiness is indescribably weird. It"s making me feel really itchy however I am unable to focus my concentration on the source of the itch. No wonder since I can"t even find my own body. Is this what a coma feels like?
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Only by forgetting the itchy feeling does it go away. That"s what I hope at least.
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It is impossible to forget THE ITCH in this land of NOTHING. Only by forgetting and ignoring can I forget. I know but I can"t. Why me?
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WHY IS THERE NOTHING BUT THIS ITCH. WHAT DID I DO WRONG? HAVE I SINNED AND THIS IS MY PUNISHMENT???
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At times I feel like the s.p.a.ce around has moved, almost as if it twisted.
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Welp, it seems like I"m dead. Just gonna do my thing in this empty s.p.a.ce. Although I seem to still posses the memories of my former life.
I can remember what the warm sun rays feel like.
I can remember the sound of birds.
I can remember the taste of a burger. But I can"t picture any humans. I know what they should look like with 2 legs, 2 arms, a @#%$#, and a head. Why can"t I picture anything to that description? My gut feeling tells me that I used to be a human but I"m just not certain. Should I trust my gut if I dont have a gut? Who"s gut is this? Was I ever even "alive"? Are these memories mine?
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Come to think of it I am unable to picture cats. What"s going on... I HATE CATS. IT HURTS SO BAD.
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Not just cats but mammals.
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Wow... I have an unbelievably huge amount of information in my brain but it"s all useless if I can"t apply it. Why can"t I just forget it? This useless info creates an empty void that messes with my mind. Knowing less would help me rest. My soul can"t handle this, it"s being torn apart piece by piece. Why is this continuing? In how many pieces can a soul be split? The soul becomes exponentially smaller with each split. Even the great evil wizard could only achieve 7 and he had to sacrifice his nose and hair. Am I an even greater evil wizard lord?
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Is this a rare form of amnesia? Did I just forget my 6 senses?
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Time has lost all meaning. The itch has evolved into a feeling of being devoured. Am I trapped and being consumed? What kind of a trap would be able to cause such a thing? A trap card? An illusion formation? One created by G.o.d himself? Now that"s just unbelievable. More like Satan created this just to torture me. I wish I could just eat him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate ...? Who do I hate? Why do I hate him? I hate myself?
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I"m still uncertain if I just can"t see or if everything is just one bland color that just appears to be nothing as my senses have adjusted to them. However everything is becoming fuzzy, almost disconnected and shattered. How can nothing feel shattered and incomplete? Is something changing? I can smell dangerous tables growing in the distance.
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I seem have started hearing things a while back. I decided to name him Jelly.
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Jelly seems to be growing louder. He"s starting to beat away at my soul. I would have long ripped off my ears if I had any.
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Jelly you"re the best. What a brilliant idea to stop THE ITCH with pain. This blindingly bright pain. It feels so relaxing and soothing. My soul feels fulfilled.
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Roses are red,
Voilets are blue,
MINE ARE ALL DEAD BECAUSE THEY WOULDN"T LISTEN TO MY ORDERS.
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WE ARE ONE,
WE ARE STRONG,
WE ARE UNITED,
TOGETHER WE LIVE,
TOGETHER WE DIE,
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but I dont want to die
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Do I want to die? huh.. Can I even die? Would I just end up back here if I did? Death would be too easy an answer. I wish I could meet Death. He seems pretty chill but smells really bad. How I do I do the do without the do?
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Everything is moving so fast, I"m being hit from every direction. I can SEE the @#%. It"s coming to save me. I AM ALIVE. I AM FREE.
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I"m not crazy. I promise Jelly, I would never hurt you no matter what happens. But will I in the future? I don"t know. I"ll kill them all. How could they. That was mine. But they took it. I will avenge you Jelly. I won"t let a single one go. Why should I care?
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Why is this happening?
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Why can"t I just die?
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What is pain?
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Why me?
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Who am I?