Watashi wa Teki ni Narimasen!

I had thought it was impossible.

Sometimes, I saw strange dreams.

It’s a dream about me watch this thing called a TV.

I don’t know if it was magic or not but in the box with a piece of gla.s.s attached, different people were reflected off from this product. From there, I saw many women who wear strange clothing other than dresses and their legs were exposed.

When I woke up, I was a little troubled whether I had wished to expose my legs since I saw such a dream.

It was a mystery how my brain imagined a TV which was an impossible article to have in reality.

And I also a person who wasn’t me, reflected in the mirror.

I did not wear a one-piece.  The me in the mirror who did not have undergarments (TL: As in layers of clothing under the one-piece) had straight black hair and dark colored eyes.

Right now, I have hair like Maron Glases and my eyes are grayish green. I wondered if I had wanted black hair and eyes and stared at my face reflected from the polished silverware.

But, I did not have such desires.

Rather, the person reflected from the mirror sells somewhat nostalgic. I wonder if it was because she resembles my deceased mother.

It was just that when I started having these dreams, my way of thinking changed.

It started when I was being avoided by my father’s second wife who had treated me coldly and the 3 servants who yielded to someone with more power.

I, Kiara Patorishiel, was 7 years old then.

Because it was only in my room where I always cry in, as I started dreaming ―― I perhaps felt bolder.

First, I stopped expecting that my father to save me.

Until now, I had done nothing except slowly cry but, my father was so absorbed into his young wife that he accepted the fact about how I was treated.

My heart felt lighter but something even more painful shook me.

When my father pa.s.sed away, I became a servant.。

She said that because I wasn’t her real child, she didn’t want to buy me clothes. I was thrown one dirt covers servant’s clothing which was not eye-catching and my things inside the room were taken.

On the other hand, the second wife bought silk clothing for her son who was born when my father was still alive. The servants who were afraid of the person with stronger power did not even try to comfort me.

Even so, it was still barely tolerable because of the memories of the kind “family” I saw in my dreams.

I endured, thinking that the second wife and my step-brother was not my family.

But, that way of living ended in 3 months.

I was adopted by an unfamiliar aristocrat.

The aristocrat who adopted me, Earl Patorishiel, wanted a daughter to be used as a chess piece to expand his influence.

Because it was required, there was never a time when I didn’t get a meal in my adopted host’s home.

I was given beautiful clothes and was also treated properly by the servants.

But, there was no love.

Even so, I was able to get in the dormitory of a Church School and for 3 years I was able to live like a normal n.o.ble lady. I lived there learning things like behaviors and manners. Subjects to become a proper bride.

I had thought that was enough.

I was pretty much relieved. The strange dreams became far away and so I thought it was because I had wanted to run away from reality.

“I might had taken it too lightly……”

In the dormitory of the Church School, I crouched and sighed.

In my dorm room, I say a letter from my adopted host and was so shocked that I almost shouted. As I was enduring it, I was struck with a tremendous feeling of hopelessness.

Written in the letter was the order to marry an Ojisan (TL: Uncle) two times her age.

Moreover, I had heard rumors about him having 3 or 4 mistresses and is hard to flatter him with his gray hair.

I had visited the adoptive family as an adopted daughter and had seen him at least once 3 years ago……his face was like a bullfrog.

Though I can’t brag about my face either, but I was only 14 years old. I can at least dream about my marriage partner, can’t I!?

My adoptive father, Earl Patorishiel, wrote that I will be married soon so I will be picked up soon.

I wonder if I was admirable since I didn’t shout “It’s a lie!” when I read that letter.