VENABLES [blandly]. Not at all, Shand. The Government are very pleased.
JOHN. You don"t expect me to believe that?
VENABLES. I called here to give you the proof of it. You may know that we are to have a big meeting at Leeds on the 24th, when two Ministers are to speak. There is room for a third speaker, and I am authorised to offer that place to you.
JOHN. To me!
VENABLES. Yes.
JOHN [swelling]. It would be--the Government taking me up.
VENABLES. Don"t make too much of it; it would be an acknowledgment that they look upon you as one of their likely young men.
MAGGIE. John!
JOHN [not found wanting in a trying hour]. It"s a bribe. You are offering me this on condition that I don"t make my speech. How can you think so meanly of me as to believe that I would play the women"s cause false for the sake of my own advancement. I refuse your bribe.
VENABLES [liking him for the first time]. Good. But you are wrong.
There are no conditions, and we want you to make your speech. Now do you accept?
JOHN [still suspicious]. If you make me the same offer after you have read it. I insist on your reading it first.
VENABLES [sighing]. By all means.
[MAGGIE is in an agony as she sees JOHN hand the speech to his leader.
On the other hand, the COMTESSE thrills.]
But I a.s.sure you we look on the speech as a small matter. The important thing is your intention of going to a division; and we agree to that also.
JOHN [losing his head]. What"s that?
VENABLES. Yes, we agree.
JOHN. But--but--why, you have been threatening to excommunicate me if I dared.
VENABLES. All done to test you, Shand.
JOHN. To test me?
VENABLES. We know that a division on your Bill can have no serious significance; we shall see to that. And so the test was to be whether you had the pluck to divide the House. Had you been intending to talk big in this speech, and then hedge, through fear of the Government, they would have had no further use for you.
JOHN [heavily]. I understand. [But there is one thing he cannot understand, which is, why VENABLES should be so sure that he is not to hedge.]
VENABLES [turning over the pages carelessly]. Any of your good things in this, Shand?
JOHN [whose one desire is to get the pages back]. No, I--no--it isn"t necessary you should read it now.
VENABLES [from politeness only]. Merely for my own pleasure. I shall look through it this evening. [He rolls up the speech to put it in his pocket. JOHN turns despairingly to MAGGIE, though well aware that no help can come from her.]
MAGGIE. That"s the only copy there is, John. [To VENABLES] Let me make a fresh one, and send it to you in an hour or two.
VENABLES [good-naturedly]. I could not put you to that trouble, Mrs.
Shand. I will take good care of it.
MAGGIE. If anything were to happen to you on the way home, wouldn"t whatever is in your pocket be considered to be the property of your heirs?
VENABLES [laughing]. Now there is forethought! Shand, I think that after that--! [He returns the speech to JOHN, whose hand swallows it greedily.] She is Scotch too, Comtesse.
COMTESSE [delighted]. Yes, she is Scotch too.
VENABLES. Though the only persons likely to do for me in the street, Shand, are your ladies" committee. Ever since they took the horse out of my brougham, I can scent them a mile away.
COMTESSE. A mile? Charles, peep in there.
[He softly turns the handle of the dining-room door, and realises that his scent is not so good as he had thought it. He bids his hostess and the COMTESSE good-bye in a burlesque whisper and tiptoes off to safer places. JOHN having gone out with him, MAGGIE can no longer avoid the COMTESSE"s reproachful eye. That much injured lady advances upon her with accusing finger.]
COMTESSE. So, madam!
[MAGGIE is prepared for her.]
MAGGIE. I don"t know what you mean.
COMTESSE. Yes, you do. I mean that there IS some one who "helps" our Mr.
Shand.
MAGGIE. There"s not.
COMTESSE. And it IS a woman, and it"s you.
MAGGIE. I help in the little things.
COMTESSE. The little things! You are the Pin he picked up and that is to make his fortune. And now what I want to know is whether your John is aware that you help at all.
[JOHN returns, and at once provides the answer.]
JOHN. Maggie, Comtesse, I"ve done it again!
MAGGIE. I"m so glad, John.
[The COMTESSE is in an ecstasy.]
COMTESSE. And all because you were not to hedge, Mr. Shand.
[His appeal to her with the wistfulness of a schoolboy makes him rather attractive.]
JOHN. You won"t tell on me, Comtesse! [He thinks it out.] They had just guessed I would be firm because they know I"m a strong man. You little saw, Maggie, what a good turn you were doing me when you said you wanted to make another copy of the speech.
[She is dense.]