Who Cares?

Chapter 30

"Take it and come right back."

"You disappoint me, Funny-face. Go to the piano and hit the notes.

That"s all you"re fit for."

It was a baby grand, much out of tune, but Howard, bulging over the stool, made it sound like an orchestra,--a cabaret orchestra, and ran from Grieg to Jerome Kern and back to Gounod, syncopating everything with the gusto and the sense of time that is almost peculiar to a colored professional. Then he suddenly burst into song and sang about a baby in the soft round high baritone of all men who run to fat and with the same quite charming sympathy. A useful, excellent fellow, amazingly unself-conscious and gifted.

Martin was infinitely content to listen and lie back in a deep straw chair with a pipe between his teeth, the memories of good evenings at Yale curling up in his smoke. And Tootles, thinking and thinking, sat, Puck-like, at his feet, with her warm shoulders against his knees. Not in her memory could she delve for pleasant things, not yet. Eh, but some day she might be among the lucky ones, if--if her plan went through--

Howard lit another cigarette at the end of the song, but before he could get his hands on the notes again Irene bounded to her feet and went over to the piano. "Say, can you play "Love"s Epitome"?" she p.r.o.nounced it "Eppy-tomy."

"Can a duck swim?" asked Howard, resisting a temptation to emit a howl of mirth. She was too good a sort to chaff about her frequent maltreatment of the language.

"Go ahead, then, and I"ll give you all a treat." He played the sentimental prelude of this characteristic product of the vaudeville stage, every note of which was plagiarized from a thousand plagiarisms and which imagined that eternity rhymed with serenity and mother with weather. With gestures that could belong to no other school than that of the twice-dailies and the shrill nasal voice that inevitably goes with them, Irene, with the utmost solemnity, went solidly through the whole appalling thing, making the frequent yous "yee-ooo" in the true "vawdville" manner.

To Tootles it was very moving, and she was proud of her friend. Martin almost died of it, and Howard was weak from suppressed laughter. It was the first time that Irene had shown the boys what she could do, and she was delighted at their enthusiastic applause. She would have rendered another of the same sort gladly enough,--she knew dozens of them, if Tootles had not given her a quick look and risen to her feet.

"Us for the downey," she said, and put the palm of her hand on Martin"s lips. He kissed it.

"Not yet," said Howard. "It"s early."

"Late enough for those who get up at dawn, old dear. Come on, Irene."

And Irene, remembering what her friend had said that morning, played the game loyally, although most reluctant to leave that pleasant atmosphere, and said "Good night." And she was in such good voice and Howard played her accompaniment like a streak. Well, well.

Tootles took her hand away gently, gave Martin a little disturbing smile, put her arm round the robust shoulders of her chum, opened the screen door and was gone.

Howard immediately left the piano. He had only played to keep things merry and bright. "Me for a drink," he said. "And I think I"ve earned it."

Martin"s teeth gleamed as he gave one of his silent laughs.

"How well you know me, old son," he said.

"Of course. But--why?"

"I like Tootles awfully. She"s one in a million. But somehow it"s--oh, I dunno,--mighty difficult to talk to her."

"Poor little devil," said Howard involuntarily.

"But she"s having a real good time--isn"t she?"

"Is she?" He helped himself to a mild highball in reluctant deference to his weight.

"I"ve never seen her look so well," said Martin.

Wondering whether to tell the truth about her state of mind, which his quick sophisticated eyes had very quickly mastered, Howard drank, and decided that he wouldn"t. It would only make things uncomfortable for Martin and be of no service to Tootles. If she loved him, poor little soul, and he was not made of the stuff to take advantage of it, well, there it was. He, himself, was different, but then he had no Joan as a silent third. No, he would let things alone. Poor old Tootles.

"Great weather," he said, wrenching the conversation into a harmless generality. "Are you sleeping on the yawl to-night?"

"Yes," replied Martin. "It"s wonderful on the water. So still. I can hear the stars whisper."

"Most of the stars I know get precious noisy at night," said Howard, characteristically unable to let such a chance go by. Then he grew suddenly grave and sat down. "Martin, I"m getting frightfully fed up with messing about in town. I"m going to turn a mental and physical somersault and get a bit of self-respect."

"Oh? How"s that, old man."

"It"s this d.a.m.n war, I think. I"ve been reading a book in bed by a man called Philip Gibbs. Martin, I"m going to Plattsburg this August to see if they can make something of me."

Martin got up. "I"m with you," he said. "If ever we get into this business I"m going to be among the first bunch to go. So we may as well know something. Well, how about turning in now? There"ll be a wind to-morrow. Hear the trees?" He filled his pocket with cigarettes and slung a white sweater over his shoulder.

"All right," said Howard. "I shall read down here a bit. I won"t forget to turn out and lock up." He had forgotten one night and Judson had reported him.

"Good night, old son."

"Good night, old man."

XII

He was not given much to reading, but when Martin left the cottage and stood out in the liquid silver of the moon under the vast dome which dazzled with stars, and he caught the flash of fireflies among the undergrowth that were like the lanterns of the fairies a line came into his mind that he liked and repeated several times, rather whimsically pleased with himself for having found it at exactly the right moment.

It was "the witching hour of night."

He remained on top of the incline for a little while, moved to that spirit of the realization of G.o.d which touches the souls of sensitive men when they are awed by the wonder and the beauty of the earth. He stood quite still, disembodied for the moment, uplifted, stirred, with all the scents and all the whisperings about him, humble, childlike, able, in that brief flight of ecstasy, to understand the language of another world.

And then the stillness was suddenly cut by a scream of vacuous laughter, probably that of an exuberant Irish maid-servant, to whom silences are made to break, carrying on, most likely, a rough flirtation with a chauffeur.

It brought Martin back to earth like the stick of a rocket. But he didn"t go down immediately to the water. He sat there and nursed his knees and began to think. Whether it was Howard"s unexpected talk of Plattsburg and of being made something of or not he didn"t know. What he did know was that he was suddenly filled with a sort of fright....

"Good G.o.d," he said to himself, "time"s rushing away, and I"m nearly twenty-six. I"m as old as some men who have done things and made things and are planted on their feet. What have I done? What am I fit to do?

Nearly twenty-six and I"m still playing games like a schoolboy!...

What"s my father saying? "We count it death to falter not to die" ...

I"ve been faltering--and before I know anything about it I shall be thirty--half-time.... This can"t go on. This waiting for Joan is faltering. If she"s not coming to me I must go to her. If it"s not coming right it must end and I must get mended and begin again. I can"t stand in father"s shoes with all he worked to make in my hands like ripe plums. It isn"t fair, or straight. I must push up a rung and carry things on for him. Could I look him in the face having slacked? My G.o.d, I wish I"d watched the time rush by! I"m nearly twenty-six ...

Joan--to-morrow. That"s the thing to do." He got up and strode quickly down to the water. "If she"s going to be my wife, that"s a good step on. And she can help me like no one but my father. And then I"ll make something of myself. If not ... if not,--no faltering, Gray,--then I"ll do it alone for both their sakes."

He chucked his sweater into the dingey, shoved it off the beach and sprang in and rowed strongly towards the yawl. Somehow he felt broader of back and harder of muscle for this summing up of things, this audit of his account. He was nearly twenty-six and nothing was done. That was the report he had to make to his conscience, that was what he had to say to the man who smiled down upon him from his place in the New York house.... Good Lord, it was about time that he pulled himself together.

The yawl was lying alone, aloof from the other small craft anch.o.r.ed near the pier. Her mast seemed taller and her lines more graceful silhouetted against the sky, silvered by the moon. It was indeed the witching hour of night.

He got aboard and tied up the dingey, cast a look round to see that everything was shipshape, took in a deep breath and went into the cabin. He was not tired and never felt less like sleep. His brain was clear as though a fog had risen from it, and energy beat in him like a running engine. He would light the lamp, get into his pajamas and think about to-morrow and Joan. He was mighty glad to have come to a decision.

Stooping, he lit the lamp, turned and gave a gasp of surprise.

There, curled up like a water sprite on the unmade bunk lay Tootles in bathing clothes, holding a rubber cap in her hand, her head, with its golden bobbed hair, dented into a cushion.

For a moment she pretended to be asleep, but anxiety to see how Martin was looking was too much for her. Also her clothes were wet and not very comfortable. She opened her eyes and sat up.

"My dear Tootles!" said Martin, "what"s the idea? You said you were going home to bed." She would rather that he had been angry than amused. "It was the night," she said, "and something in the air. I just had to bathe and swam out here. I didn"t think you"d be coming yet. I suppose you think I"m bug-house."

"No, I don"t. If I hadn"t taken my bathing suit to the cottage to be mended I"d have a dip myself. Cigarette?" He held one out.

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