Kokoro Connect

Chapter 6 - The Realisation of Inaba Himeko

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Chapter 6 - The Realisation of Inaba Himeko

——I want to die.

She kept wanting to say that.

No, I shouldn"t be saying that, not even as a joke, Inaba Himeko admonished herself.

She had been stuck in a spiral of negative train of thoughts yesterday, and those thoughts underwent "Sentiment Transmission", which brought both her and the others a lot of trouble (Taichi especially, after hearing her "Sentiment Transmission", ran straight to Inaba"s house, causing quite a bit of stir).

She jumped at the call with arrogance, a halfhearted resolution, plus a "things will work out" kind of self-indulging sense of duty, and earned herself a bitter taste of retribution in the end.

Inaba reminisced about what Iori said to her yesterday.

She thought she knew how irresponsible she had been herself.

She thought she was all prepared to carry the brand of her sin and move on forward.

Yet, she took this heavy of a blow from simply being reprimanded by Iori. She was not able to bear the consequences of her own actions after all.

She was naive; she thought she understood everything.

Because Iori had told her to do so before... No, she mustn"t put the blame on others.

Since she had fallen in love, she could not help it; it meant everything, so she could be forgiven——Things like those often seen in movies or dramas were all time favourite among girls. However, they simply do not work in reality.

Inaba reminisced about Iori"s delicate, yet expressionless, doll-like face.

——Imposing.

What had she imposed on Iori?

There was an enormous gap between the image of "Nagase Iori" she had drawn in her heart and that of Iori at the present.

What was the latent meaning behind this contrast?

Everything built up until now had fallen apart. What remained were...

"Inaba! Quit slacking! Club activities will be banned starting from tomorrow until three days before the exams, so we have to finish our presentation preparations today!"

"That"s right, Inaba-chan! I wanted to study too! If I flunked the finals it"d be all your fault, Inaba-chan!"

"...That would be your own fault wouldn"t it?"

"Taichi! Stop being so serious~ You"re supposed to say "It"s Sat.u.r.day yet we are out here working" after me~!"

"Er... It"s Sat.u.r.day yet we are out here working."

"Yup, that"s the spirit. Good job, good job!"

"Stop fooling around you two! Don"t forget there"s only four of us here, we"ll fall behind schedule if you keep this up!"

"Yes, Yui."

"My bad, Kiriyama."

"Good. By the way Aoki, even if you study hard for one night, your grades won"t improve."

"You don"t have to be so mean!"

"You reap what you sow."

"Taichi you don"t have to rub it against my face either!"

"Even if you ended up being my kouhai... Ahem."

"D-Don"t jinx me like that! Haha... Ha... AHHH~~ I"m scared now! I don"t wanna repeat year one again!"

...These guys are so noisy.

"You too, Inaba. Are you still s.p.a.cing out?"

"Oh, right... Sorry."

As Yui called her out, Inaba continued her suspended work.

"...No matter how stupid you are, if you repeat the year again, you would still be able to promote. So no need to fret."

"Inaba-chan is already treating my repeating the year as a given!? And besides, when Yui said "You too, Inaba," I didn"t think she meant to ask you to join up and open fire at me!"

After making fun of Aoki, Inaba managed to get herself back to her usual pace.

The preparation for their club presentation had entered the final stage. They had completed making the paper vellum for their oral report, and the amount of sheets easily exceeded ten. If they spread out the vellum sheets, they could easily take up the entire club room and have many left overs. Not to mention the vellum sheets weren"t only written with simple text. The t.i.tle text and colour were treated with extra care as well. The final product was so detailed, one couldn"t help but to gasp in awe. In addition to all of those, Yui, who became unusually finicky on the way, started adding all kinds of ill.u.s.trations. Thanks to these ill.u.s.trations, the paper vellum felt much more engaging to look at. Inaba was deeply impressed at their own progress.

With this quality, and the amount of information they had collected (they didn"t think they could finish introducing all of them under fifteen minutes), they should be able to leave an impression that could rival the Jazz Band"s. In fact, Inaba could even say that, since no other club would go that far to collect these information, the judges" evaluation would probably tip towards the CRC"s favour.

They had it in the bag, Inaba reckoned.

Her plan was devised for a guaranteed victory to begin with, but what was more important to her, was that they were able to work together.

For a concluding piece of their year-worth of club activities, this was an admirable feat.

Hereafter, they would be rehearsing their oral report individually, and then proceed to group rehearsing after the exams, and set foot on the stage at the end.

It was worth mentioning that their oral report was to be carried out by five person. Although Inaba resisted the idea, she also prepared a four-person version.

She isn"t here now, but when they go on stage, Iori will show up——as much as Inaba wanted to believe that, the presentation event would not allow them any leisure, hence she must be prepared for any situation.

...Wonder what Iori"s doing now.

"Inaba, it"ll be alright."

Taichi said to her in a volume that only she could hear.

Inaba was startled for a moment. She thought the "Sentiment Transmission" phenomenon had triggered, but it turned out not the case. Taichi merely guessed her feelings from observing her look.

"Thank you."

Inaba replied softly, and focused her eyes back on her work.

Ah, it feels warm. She thought.

It was so warm, she wanted to lean towards it.

But... would she be allowed to do such thing?

Iori could still be suffering at the moment.

Inaba thought she knew Iori better than anyone.

But now, she was not able to reach out to Iori"s feelings at all.

It was all because of Iori that she was able to come to where she was at the present. Without Iori, she would still be morose and shutting herself alone in the dark. It was also with Iori"s help, that Inaba was able to make many more friends in cla.s.s.

——They would continue to be friends, Iori had said that to her.

——Their friends.h.i.+p would not be destroyed just because they were competing for the same guy, Iori had said that to her.

Which part was right? Which part was wrong?

Or was it in fact, it used to be right but now it is wrong?

If this was the case, it would be too sad. Too, very sad.

Inaba realised how much Iori meant to her.

It was always when things were already too late, that she would realise her own feelings. It had always been like that for her.

As a result, she had hurt the very people and things she treasured.

She could never stop regretting. Was there any way for her to atone for her sins? Could things returned to where they were?

If she gave up Taichi, and returned to where she was when she watched over Iori and Taichi slowly coming together... Thoughts that must not be thought emerged in Inaba"s mind.

——Kacha. The club room door opened.

Inaba"s heart jumped for a moment.

Did she come?

Iori, the president of the CRC, came to help with the preparation of the——

"Yo~ You guys working hard?"

The face of Gotou Ryuuzen, the cla.s.s 1C homeroom teacher as well as the CRC"s club advisor, popped up form behind the door.

Inaba felt a chill for a moment for a certain other reason, but Gotou"s eyes were normal, and there were no sign of any absurd sluggishness. It was not the certain jerk who loved Gotou"s body, just the normal Gotou.

Even so, he was not the one Inaba hoped to see.

"Ah, ahh, it"s Go-san... Thank goodness."

Yui let out a sigh of relief.

"What, Kiriyama? Are you that happy to see me? You"re a cute one aren"t you."

"C-Cute... Hehe, you say cute, I"m not that... Weird. How come I don"t feel at all happy when Go-san compliments me? Is it because Go-san is bald?"

"Oi oi, no matter how you think of it, this has nothing to do with being bald! And besides, I am not bald. I just got a wider forehead than other people! You heard me!? Oi!"

It was her first time seeing Gotou flipping. It would seem that the word "bald" was a taboo for him. Inaba figured she would add it to her dictionary (Gotou only) should she need to bully him.

She find herself having the leisure to contemplate on pointless things like that now. Apparently she could relief some stress by watching idiots doing idiotic things; she had also switched back to her "outward mode".

"Oi, Inaba, you wouldn"t happen to be... thinking about treating me like an idiot right?"

"Get out."

"Why am I being told off just for trying to verify whether I"m being told off!?"

"Anyway, it"s kind of rare to see Go-san visiting the club room."

Taichi said, to which Yui and Aoki continued after:

"Wait, isn"t this the first time that"s ever happened!?"

"It"s a miracle!"

"For an advisor, this is a dereliction of duty."

Inaba muttered tiredly.

"What nonsense, I"m here for real now. Isn"t that amazing?"

"That"s nothing to be proud of!"

"In the end, what are you doing here, Go-san?" Aoki inquired.

"Oh, right right, here."

Gotou put a bag with five cans of soda on the table.

"You guys seem to be working very hard. This is for cheering you guys."

"Yay~~" Everyone cheered.

"But how should I say it... It"s gonna be tough if you guys want to beat the Jazz Club."

His tone was serious and very teacher-like. Gotou did seem to think it would be very difficult for the CRC to win.

"That being said, I have good faith on you. Believe it or not, bystanders will always feel the ones who are fighting hard, and will always reach out for them."

Bystanders will feel the ones who are fighting hard.

As long as you work hard, someone will reach out for you.

Inaba believed these two notions to be very important.

"Go-san, you... you really are a teacher!"

Yui said as though she was impressed.

"I guess this does happen sometimes..."

"This is probably the first time I"ve seen Go-san behaving like a teacher."

Taichi and Aoki gave their thought as well.

"What have you been seeing me as all these time!? Ahh, I see. Have you been seeing me a cool and admirable brother figure? This is embarra.s.sing~"

"Your optimism is really something ain"t it!"

Inaba jabbed. She was glad that she wasn"t alone, but together with everyone.

"Hm? I thought I felt something missing in here, turns out to be Nagase after all. Is she out to the bathroom or something?"

[ It"s cold today too. ]

It was Iori"s "Sentiment Transmission.

If only Iori was here too, it would"ve been perfect then.

The weekend pa.s.sed. The scene s.h.i.+fted to Monday in school. Inaba arrived at the cla.s.sroom earlier than usual.

The finals that spans from Wednesday to Friday were imminent.

The exam scope was wide. Inaba, too, knew she should get on seriously, yet she was not able to make any progress in her studies. Even though she wasn"t exactly going to get a horrible grade, she might run the risk of a drop in her rankings.

About two-thirds of the students had already arrived at their cla.s.srooms in school. Lively chattering unique to the morning could be heard around the place.

"How long did you study yesterday?" "...Zip. I"ve been busy with club activities all these time, it"s seldom that I get a break... It"s only making me wanna slack off and have fun you know..." "Eh~ Then you didn"t finish your practice questions? Didn"t you say you were gonna finish them yesterday?" "And who"s fault was that? You"re the one who called me and ended up chatting all day!"

Students were chatting about their studies everywhere. It was a common sight before exams.

However, exams weren"t the only thing being discussed in the cla.s.sroom.

"Watase, how did your "Even though you did not receive chocolate on Valentine"s Day, you"re still gonna gift something to Fujis.h.i.+ma-san, in order to invite her for a date" plan go?" "Shush, you"re too loud... Er, about that, Fujis.h.i.+ma-san seemed to be busy with this "Guys who received chocolate yet too wimpy to show their resolve should all be spanked" mission that day..."

There were stupid conversations.

"Lemme tell you~ I b.u.mped into Fujis.h.i.+ma-san walking her dog last night. Her dog is a bull dog, it"s super cute~" "Eh? I don"t think bull dogs are cute..." "I can"t pretend I didn"t hear that!" "F-Fujis.h.i.+ma-san!?"

And there were girly conversations. Got to say though, Fujis.h.i.+ma Maiko was certainly popular.

[ I"m gonna be late! Dash dash das.h.!.+ Ack, red light! Don"t das.h.!.+ ]

It was Aoki"s inner voice.

The fact that even these panicky sentiment of his were sent to her was extremely irritating. Inaba found it disruptive from the bottom of her gut.

And then, as she was listening to the chatters——

"I"ve always been wondering, is Iori really born like that? For a sweet person she does seem a little too perfect. It feels a little fake. I kept thinking that it was probably an act..."

"To be honest, a girl who"s cheerful and lively and a little nutty... I didn"t think such a person would exist..."

"The rumours about her deceiving guys... Judging by how she"s acting right now, maybe they"re true after all..."

Without realising, Inaba caught wind of such conversations.

Suddenly, she found her eyes meeting with one of the girls talking about Iori.

Inaba quickly averted her eyes forward and returned to her seat. She took out a dictionary. She wasn"t exactly looking up anything, but she pretended to be in order to continue listen to the conversations in the cla.s.s.

The criticism against Iori continued to spread throughout the cla.s.s.

It was not a dramatic s.h.i.+ft, but it was steadily spreading, like a dye would on a piece of cloth.

Is it too late for Iori to go back?

Inaba refused to believe that, but, she did not know what she could do.

She deeply realised how powerless she was.

She began to mock herself.

What did she mean by, her hobby was to collect and a.n.a.lyse data?

What did she mean by, her motto was to completely keep hold of the situation and——

"Everyone, listen to me!"

A familiar voice echoed in the cla.s.sroom. Inaba lifted her head and looked towards the source.

Yaegas.h.i.+ Taichi was standing before the podium.

His expression was resolute, as though saying he was about to march to the battlefield.

Inaba was familiar with that look. She had seen it several times before.

But why? Instead of antic.i.p.ation... she had this bad feeling stirring within her.

Now that she thought of it, Yui sent her a message in the morning which said "I"ve received one of Taichi"s "Sentiment Transmission, he seems to be up to something. Be careful." Should she have been more attentive?

There were still a few students who hadn"t arrived in cla.s.s yet. Taichi"s voice echoed loudly through out the cla.s.sroom.

Watase jeered "What"s with you today, Yaegas.h.i.+" at the start, but upon seeing Taichi"s unusually serious look, everyone in cla.s.s went silent.

"I was going to formally explain this to everyone afterwards, but I wanted to say this now."

What trouble is he trying to cause this time?

"I think everyone might have known this already, Nagase has been acting strangely lately, and there"s been odd rumours about Nagase spreading around."

I could have guessed, but is that what this is about in the end?

Inaba peered around the cla.s.sroom——Iori had not arrived at school yet.

"I think it"s more truth than rumours though! Is it not?"

A loud voice sounded from the centre of the room.

It was Setouchi Kaoru. She was a slightly-misbehaved delinquent, and seemed to be the one responsible for stirring the cla.s.s and spreading the negative rumours about Iori.

Taichi looked towards Setouchi.

They stared at each other, and created a few seconds of silence.

Then, Taichi looked away, peered around the cla.s.sroom and said:

"I haven"t really grasp the exact content of the rumours, so I have no idea what everyone have heard. But I want to say this first, I"d like to ask everyone not to blindly believe rumours."

"I think that"s personal freedom though, is it not?"

Setouchi questioned in a haughty tone.

"Yes, just as you said. Which is why I"d like to ask everyone to judge on their own whether those rumours are true or not."

Taichi replied without a shred of hesitation. Once he found his resolve, there would be nothing able to deter him, as expected from Taichi.

Discussion began to spread among the cla.s.s. Students who arrived after Taichi began his speech went "Eh, what"s going on?" and asked others for details.

The mood in the cla.s.s underwent an apparent change from Taichi"s words. After all, people had never disliked Iori to begin with, that and the fact they had been cla.s.smates the whole year, it was only natural that they would come to the conclusion that "Iori is a good person".

Inaba knew this very well.

In fact, she could be the one standing on the podium, and not Taichi.

Yet, she did not do so as such, and did not plan to do so.

Because she feared that should she fail, she would risk suffering from the backlash.

Inaba was known for her arrogant demeanour, as well as her blunt way of speech; on the other hand, she was extremely cautious, avoiding every situation that would risk making enemies.

Under certain circ.u.mstances, the school could become a merciless field. One small emotional dispute could be enough to turn everyone against her. This was why Inaba was afraid. Taichi probably knew this fact as well.

Even so, Taichi stood up at the podium.

Who was he doing it for?

He did it for Nagase Iori, the very person who rejected him.

"...Truth or not, just look at how Nagase"s acting now. Don"t you think the answer"s obvious?"

Setouchi"s words had turned the opinions in a different direction once more. Inaba could feel it easily from the air. "She has a point..." "That does seem a little..." "...The s.h.i.+ft in personality is too great," she could hear comments like that.

Indeed, that was the most definitive reason why Inaba was ultimately unable to make that step.

If Iori didn"t do anything yet rumours began to spread, Inaba would have refuted them right away.

However, Iori had been acting unusually cold towards everyone around her. She had shut herself out from everyone, as though nodding towards the negative rumours about her.

No matter what others might say, if she was acting like that to begin with, and showed no intention of denying, there was nothing Inaba could do at all.

"There is a reason for that."

Reason? Did Taichi find out the reason somewhere along the way?

"Oh? What is it?"

Setouchi asked in a grating tone.

"The truth is..."

Taichi did not continue, and bit his lips instead. The audience could feel his anxiety as well. The tension in the cla.s.s increased. What kind of shocking reason would Taichi give?

"I... I love Nagase!"

WHATISTHISGUYTALKINGABOUTALLOFTHESUDDEN?[1]

Everyone else in the cla.s.s froze.

But Taichi did not mind it, and continued:

"So I tried be forceful on Nagase... several times. Like... very forceful, indescribably forceful."

...Since when did that ever happen?

n.o.body stopped Taichi from continuing.

"And honestly... I went overboard, very overboard, extremely overboard."

Taichi clenched his fist, and said in a determined tone:

"It"s overboard to the point that... it was shocking!"

The girls around began to look wary towards Taichi, and some boy muttered "Where did this hero come from?" in the back.

"And then, because I went overboard... Nagase seemed to have lost her faith in humanity!"

Inabahimekohasalwaysbelievedthismantobeanidiotandtodayshesisabletoconfirmitoncemore.Thismanisanidiot.Afreakingidiot.f.u.c.kyou.[2]

...Ah. Her brain had deteriorated to a state of moronity from the shock. Astonis.h.i.+ng.

In front of the whole cla.s.s, with such a loud volume, with this open and aboveboard att.i.tude, this man, what on earth does he think he is talking about?

"In other words, the reason Nagase became like that, is all because of me. Nagase is not at fault!"

[ Even though it was a big fat lie! ]

[ It better be! ]

Inaba managed to reply Taichi"s "Sentiment Transmission" with her own "Sentiment Transmission." What was that about?

"In other words..." "If this is true..." "This doesn"t sound like a joke..."

The cla.s.s began to stir, and was gradually spreading. It was only natural.

"Could it be hara.s.s— ...Mmph!" "D—Don"t say it!"

The uproar was beginning to go out of control, like the surging wave on the sea.

"Th-That can"t be possible right, I mean, he wouldn"t go as far as hara.s.s..."

The wave of controversy developed into a raging wave in the storm. Taichi began to panic.

"Ah, h.e.l.lo Dad? Seems there"s a criminal in my cla.s.s, can you lend a couple people here?"

Fujis.h.i.+ma even called her father who was allegedly a high-ranked officer of the police force.

"Eh? I didn"t do anything illegal... Oh, what"s wrong, Inaba?"

Before she realised it herself, Inaba had already walked up to Taichi.

"At least be a little more mindful of the consequences before you act, you idiot!"

"Oomph!"

Inaba smashed her fist into Taichi"s stomach with every ounce of strength she could muster and dragged him out towards the club room.

Luckily, it was study period, so Inaba decided to skip the first cla.s.s. Needless to say, Taichi was coerced to do the same.

When the teacher came to take attendance before the cla.s.s starts, Inaba used "This guy"s having a stomach ache, I"m taking him to the nurse"s office" as an excuse (which wasn"t exactly a lie) and told the cla.s.s that "Most of what Yaegas.h.i.+ Taichi said just now were completely made up, please don"t believe him. I"ll explain the details later." She also convinced Fujis.h.i.+ma and averted the crisis of having Taichi arrested on spot.

"Inaba-san... the floor is cold."

"Shut up."

Inaba was sitting on the chair and looking down at Taichi, who was sitting in seiza on the club room floor.

"Well then, explain yourself. What was the meaning of that back there?"

Inaba inquired Taichi. Her voice was trembling in rage.

"..."

But Taichi remained still and silent.

"...Oi, what are you being so quiet for? Hurry up and answer me."

"Eh... That"s because Inaba told me to shut up..."

"Don"t give me that grade-schooler"s bull c.r.a.p! What are you, stupid!? You"re actually stupid aren"t you!?"

"N-No, I mean, if it were Inaba, she would probably render me powerless first and then start hurling an endless row of abuse at me or something like that..."

"I was NOT about to employ that kind of "play"!"

"...You weren"t?"

"What are you looking so disappointed for!?"

So that was your wish, was it!? I can give it to you you know! ...Oops, off topic!

Inaba sighed and paused briefly.

"Anyway, what you did back there, what on earth was that about?"

"...First things first, I was only feeling relieved just now. I was not feeling disappointed or anything, okay?"

"Okay I get it, hurry up and answer my question."

It"s alright, Taichi, I"ve already marked you as a m.a.s.o.c.h.i.s.t. I"ll make sure to do some research on being a s.a.d.i.s.t for——

——Ahem. Inaba cleared her throat and switched her brain back to serious mode.

"Uh, I was trying to mitigate those strange rumours about Nagase..."

"The first half of your speech was fine, and your point about "not to blindly believe rumours" was entirely correct... In fact, I should be the one to be criticized for turning a blind eye on the whole situation. But the problem lies within the latter half of your speech, what"s with that made up excuse at the end?"

"I wanted to clear up the misunderstanding towards Nagase, but I couldn"t find any way to deal with her att.i.tude at the moment."

"That I understand."

"So I thought, if Nagase became like that due to certain external factors, then people wouldn"t be too harsh on her."

"That too I understand."

"But sine we can"t mention anything about «Heartseed», I thought I would make up some sensible sort of external factor instead."

"Sounds logical."

"So the idea that came to me was that, I went overly aggressive on my pursue for Nagase which caused her to——"

"How on earth did it come to this from there? Why did you throw yourself into the pit like that?"

Taichi"s reputation in cla.s.s was cras.h.i.+ng in an incredible momentum. What on earth was he thinking?

"I can"t think of any other ideas though. It might be impolite to say it, but I did come up with something along the lines of family emergency... However, should Nagase deny it herself, then it"d be all in vain. But if I tell them that something like "I forced upon her", then even if Nagase denied it, people are less likely to buy into her."

I see, that does seem to make sense. But...

"That"s still too risky though... If you tell people that you hara.s.sed Iori, you would deeply hurt Iori too..."

"This you must allow me to object! I"ve never said anything like "I hara.s.sed her", I did not mean it that way!"

"Well, I can"t say it"s surprising coming from you. However, your execution is terrible; your words can easily be taken the wrong way you know."

"I had to emphasize the blame on me in order for everyone to believe me though...," Taichi muttered dejectedly.

Inaba understood well. This man before her did not feel dejected merely from of being mistaken. He was also deeply regretting that his action might have ended up hurting others. This "self-sacrificing spirit" of Taichi"s was something Inaba was madly fuming about all the time. But at the same time, it was also something she was madly in love for.

"That being said, even though the whole mistaking of "your hara.s.sing Iori" was an unexpected outcome, you were planning to divert all the criticism upon yourself to begin with, am I correct? Don"t you think that would merely change the subject of antagonism to a different person, and not solve the problem?"

Say something like you merely wanted to carry the pain for others, and I will beat you into a pulp.

"...Concerning Nagase being "like that" at the moment, while I"m sure "Sentiment Transmission" was a major part of the cause, I think the rumours and people"s harping on them added to it as well. If I remove one of these factors, then Nagase would be able to recover more quickly, right? Luckily for me, "Sentiment Transmission" did not affect me enough to be a concern, so I thought I would have enough leisure to absorb some of the blow for Nagase..."

...Sounded a bit flimsy, but reasonable enough for me to buy it I guess. Be glad that you"re still alive, Taichi.

"And besides, once it"s all over, we can just explain it to others. I"m sure things will turn out fine in the end."

Aren"t you a confident one. Oi.

For Inaba, who tended to worry a lot and not able to trust others completely, such confidence was something she would never have.

"...I"ll help clean up the mess with you after this. I must say though, I was thinking in relief earlier that you were restraining yourself for the right time to act, but I"d never expected that, as soon as you act, you"d charge right into the centre of the heat."

"Kiriyama told me that I"d normally be "more persevering," so I gave it a thought, and came to think that that feel to act is important too..."

Yui... that dolt. I"m going to have a little chat with her after this.

"Ki-Kiriyama didn"t do anything wrong."

"Hm? I didn"t trigger "Sentiment Transmission" just now, did I?"

I must have shown a vicious look on my face. Self-restrain, self-restrain.

"Anyway, from this point on, if you"re going to do something stupid like this again, talk to me first! Understood?! ...Really understood?!"

For the sake of the stupid man before her, Inaba insisted repeatedly.

"Yes ma"am..."

Taichi replied with an obedient look on his face. He seemed to be reflecting, Inaba figured she would let him off for now.

"By the way...," Inaba spoke again.

"What?"

"How long are you gonna keep up with that seiza on the icy floor? The weather"s freezing as h.e.l.l you know."

"You should have told me earlier if you didn"t need me to sit!"

Such an obedient guy, she thought. An unknown, strange fetish that stirred within her was awak— ...No no no, nothing was awaken, nothing was awaken!

"——That"s about it, this guy"s speech was to divert everyone"s negativity away from Iori, hence the bunch of nonsense he pulled."

Inaba said, while Taichi bowed and apologized next to her.

"I"m really sorry, I caused a commotion with my lies, I hope you can pretend it never happened."

The two were carrying out the plan Inaba suggested——sincerely explain to each of their cla.s.smates in order to earn their understanding.

"...Then, what"s the reason behind Iori looking so down or acting so coldly?"

One of the two girls inquired after both listening to Inaba and Taichi"s explanation.

"About that, I can"t explain it right now... This might sound selfish, but I hope you would believe that Iori is not a bad person at heart. You will understand it one day, so until then..."

Taichi continued after Inaba:

"She is someone I would defend even at the cost of what I did back there——she"s worth that much for us, I hope you can take this as part of your consideration."

As they finished, the two girls looked at each other briefly.

Then, they soften their expression:

"Mm~ I figured as much~ Yaegas.h.i.+-kun isn"t that type of person after all."

"So it was only a lie after all. Thank goodness. Our image of Yaegas.h.i.+-kun still lives!"

They did not take any dramatic measure, and merely used the most straightforward and honest approach, yet it was surprisingly effective and comforting.

"Hmm I still don"t quite understand what"s going on with Iori though... But I"m sure there"s a reason for that. We"ll just need to watch over her with a warm heart, is that right?"

"We have both Yaegas.h.i.+-kun and Inaba-san saying this to us after all... And besides, I know Iori isn"t a bad person at heart."

Upon seeing the their benignancy, Inaba felt her heart at ease.

After another brief moment of conversation, the two girls said "See ya," and left the cla.s.sroom.

Thus concluding Inaba and Taichi"s operation to explain to the cla.s.s. They didn"t think it would be a good idea to let Iori or Setouchi hear them, hence the two explained secretly and individually to the rest of the cla.s.s. They had to spend a lot of time for that, but they managed to complete their objective before the end of cla.s.ses.

Thanks to that Taichi"s ridiculous speech earlier plus Inaba and Taichi"s effort together in explaining, the atmosphere towards Iori in cla.s.s had shown an apparent improvement. They probably did not even need Taichi"s speech to begin with. Inaba figured their sincere request towards the cla.s.s would have sufficed.

It was so simple, Inaba was shocked at why she did not make the move at the beginning.

Truth to be told, she already knew the reason herself.

It takes courage to make the first step.

That was something that can be easily achieved once she made the first step. However, even though she was aware of such, if there was no guarantee in succeeding, and if it was accompanied by risk, it was difficult for her to make such a step.

Especially for someone like her, who would always end up thinking towards the worst yet unlikely outcome——in this case, being shunned by her cla.s.smates, it was made even more difficult for her to act.

However, this man had the courage to make that step.

Though whenever he decided to do so, it would always end up as a huge but thoughtless, reckless step. That was one little drawback of his.

"...Now that I think of it, we should have done this right at the beginning."

Taichi seemed to have realised it as well.

"Which is why you should remember to talk to me first next time."

"Yes ma"am... Sigh, I"m useless in the end after all... If Inaba you didn"t help me I would"ve been done for..."

His awe-inspiring momentum during his speech on the podium had disappeared without a trace.

"But it was all because of you taking the first step that I was able to follow suit. It"s because there was two of us..."

As she was speaking, Inaba realised.

Taichi"s impulsiveness and her own discreetness joint together and formed a combination.

It wasn"t so bad of a combination after all, she thought.

They complemented each other"s flaw and added to each other"s strength.

She felt she was able to do many more things.

Was this the meaning behind people"s connection with each other? This thought came up in Inaba"s mind.

"The two of you are getting along very nicely lately."

"Huh!?" "Whaa!?"

A voice sounded behind them and the two spun around in surprised, and found Fujis.h.i.+ma Maiko, the cla.s.s representative of cla.s.s 1C, standing there.

"Thanks for your hard work. I was going to fear for the worst earlier. But as expected from Inaba-san and Yaegas.h.i.+-kun, you handled it beautifully."

Fujis.h.i.+ma lifted her gla.s.ses with her finger and commended the two.

"Fujis.h.i.+ma... Now that you mention it, why didn"t you do anything? You must have noticed the mood centering around Iori worsening in the cla.s.s, right? Normally you would be the first one to act..."

Inaba asked. She had thought it was unusual since before.

"I was quite troubled too. I thought I shouldn"t meddle in too much, and would be better to watch over everyone"s growth as a cla.s.s rep."

"...Why are you perceiving it like a mother would watching over her children?"

Taichi jabbed under his breath.

"To lead everyone forward and not deprive the opportunity of individual growth... Such is an important lesson for me from now on."

"Just what kind of goal is that supposed to be?"

Inaba couldn"t help but to jab along.

"Though, I"d never expected things to turn out this bad. I know it might be too late to ask, but do you need my help?"

Upon hearing that question, Taichi peeked at Inaba"s face.

Inaba hesitated a little, and——

"Nah."

She answered that.

[ Is there anything the two of us can"t do? ]

"...I can think of quite a few."

Inaba kicked at the dense and awful-at-reading-atmosphere guy next to her and sent him flying.

Inaba and Taichi walked side by side on the field. Since club activities were banned before the finals, the field was s.p.a.cious and empty.

Inaba suddenly remembered something, and asked:

"By the way, didn"t you say before that you felt agonized because you were too sensitive of other"s pain? In that case, would taking the pain directly like this okay for you?"

"...It"s fine, because I understand the actual pain was merely that much. After all, I used to think that if I took up the pain myself, I would understand it better, which was how I ended up the "selfless freak" you guys keep talking about..."

Base on the meaning of that, the "Sentiment Transmission" phenomenon was probably a good thing for Taichi.

"Is that so. By the way, why did you add "used to" in your sentence on your own as if it was in the past? You"re still the same."

Do you mind not reviving Taichi"s crazy self-sacrificing spirit, «Heartseed»? Just as he was beginning to behave himself too.

"You really are hopeless without someone like me keeping an eye on you, aren"t you?"

"Haha, it"s possible. I"m gonna need to ask you to keep a good eye on me now, don"t I."

"Oh, sure."

Soon afterwards, Inaba blushed over what she said. She felt that the conversation just now... was like something between couples would have. She didn"t mean to build up that kind of atmosphere, so she was deeply embarra.s.sed.

And then Inaba realised one thing.

She could be mistaken. She could be illuding herself. She could be imagining things from her desire. She could be self-indulging and making false a.s.sumptions.

But, could it be that... Taichi needed her too?

Just as how she needed Taichi.

Inaba had this mild feeling.

She knew she loved Taichi, but Taichi had chosen Iori before, thus she did not know what to do, and felt distressed. But objectively speaking, having two people supporting each other was actually a good thing. And if the fact of the two of them being together does not only fulfil her desire, but also benefit Taichi——

[ What does it mean to "fall in love with a person"? What does it mean to "go out with a person"? ]

"Uhhhhh!?"

Taichi"s "Sentiment Transmission" caused Inaba to cry out in surprise; the strange gazes she attracted from around her made her feel very uneasy.

"Uh... That was... I was just thinking of something..."

Taichi explained in panic.

Inaba felt her heart pounding.

Her heart sped faster than usual.

It couldn"t be due to "Sentiment Transmission," that she was able to feel Taichi"s heartbeat, could it?

Taichi"s heartbeat, mixed together with her own feelings, Inaba began to lose track of what was going on.

[ I could equate myself to being told by Nagase that she doesn"t need me, but does Inaba need me? ]

"Ho-Hoh!?"

She made a weird shriek. Those gazes around, they stung. She wanted to dig a hole and hide in it.

"Guh... Again! Did we just enter "Sentiment Transmission"s" high frequency zone!?"

"I-I know right, haha..."

Inaba pretended to be calm and replied.

That being said, she figured she should answer Taichi"s question.

"I... need you very much, you know..."

It was a soft and timid tone.

"Eh... Ahh... Thank you."

As though embarra.s.sed, Taichi blushed and avoided her eyes.

...Do I look really embarra.s.sed right now? Inaba wondered.

I can"t believe I said words like "I need you very much"...

Words like that...

Words like that......

............It"s too embarra.s.sing!

Her cheeks were hot, as though boiling. Was her face completely red now? It was embarra.s.sing. Inaba tried to hide her face behind her scarf, but couldn"t. She wanted to cry.

She felt... Perhaps she was too embarra.s.sed, she seemed to going numb.

Her thoughts were becoming embarra.s.singly bold.

Stop. She could hear her composed self telling her that from far away. But she ignored it. Yes, ignore it. Listen. Listen to yourself. You want to listen now. So listen.

Inaba placed her fingers in her scarf.

She then pulled her scarf down a little, revealing her mouth so that she could speak clearly.

"Am I... Am I needed for you?"

As she said it, the entire world fell silent. Noises, chatters, and even the sounds of her own heartbeat, faded away without a trace.

Did she just asked a really astounding question?

Inaba wasn"t sure if this question was significant to others. But for her, it was extremely important.

Was the question necessary?

It seemed to weigh a lot heavier than "Do you love me".

If she was rejected, if she was told that she was "not needed", what should she do?

Taichi spoke:

"You are, of course... needed."

Her heart stopped.

Her mind went blank.

And then, Inaba finally understood what those words meant.

Ahh. Are you trying to make me die from joy? You jerk.

What on earth are we doing in the middle of the road——As the two came back to their senses, they hurried and parted their respective way home.

After confirmation, it seemed some of Taichi"s "Sentiment Transmission" were forwarded to Yui and Aoki as well. Thankfully none were forwarded to Iori.

Inaba contemplated.

——Nagase Iori.

She was her cla.s.smate, her club mate, and a friend whom she spent the most time with ever since entering high school, her most precious friend.

Inaba thought she knew Nagase Iori better than anyone else.

But it was really nothing more than "she thought".

Accept it, she told herself. Accept this undeniable truth with your heart.

And then, from there, think about how to make the next step.

Since she did not have that realisation before, she only managed to confront Iori half-heartedly. Hence, she was punished for her naivety in the end, hurting the others long the way. Inaba regretted this.

Also, as she watched Taichi"s every move, Inaba remembered.

She had received the others" benevolence many times, yet she had forgotten it. Inaba deeply regretted this.

No, was it only because she hadn"t found her resolve then?

Now that she thought of it, she had never reveal everything herself, yet she wanted the others to reveal everything. What insolence.

If she wished the others to dig out their heart, she must first dig out her own.

This is an unwritten truth.

But wasn"t this exactly the "self-sacrificing spirit" that she had been painstakingly reminding Taichi to be mindful of?

Actually, who cared.

Inaba felt the current her could do anything, nothing would be a problem for her.

Having been recognized by the one she loved, Inaba felt empowered. She found this feeling fascinating.

Who was Inaba Himeko?

——She will always take act whenever a decision is made. She will never give up no matter the odds. Arrogant, patronizing, willing to manipulative others for personal gain, and willing to do whatever it takes to achieve what she wants. That"s Inaba Himeko!

These were words that her most important friend had told her from a while back——the time when she hated every single inch of herself. Even until now, Inaba treasured those words deep in her heart.

What was she acting like a weakling for?

Back at that moment, back at that time, those words she said from her heart, were they all lies?

Not a chance.

What she could do now, was to stay true to herself, the very self that Iori told her about.

It would also mean that, she had faith in Nagase Iori.

She had been in her "girl in love" mode lately. This mode of hers, on the other hand, didn"t get much chance to s.h.i.+ne.

It was time for her to get back on track.

It was all thanks to Iori, that Inaba was able to make it to where she was today.

Nagase Iori was her important friend no matter how one would put it.

As for carrying out the plan... How about Friday, when the finals end?

She prayed that this thought wouldn"t be transmitted by "Sentiment Transmission."

Actually, no.

"I won"t let your "Sentiment Transmission" interfere, «Heartseed». Because it"ll be more interesting this way. ...What say you?"

Inaba declared towards her "observer" «Heartseed», a fearless smile brimmed on her face.

"Setouchi-san is here for you..."

My cla.s.smate, Nakayama Mariko, said to me.

"I see."

I replied and stood up from my seat.

Setouchi Kaoru and her two female friends from other cla.s.ses stood at the entrance. They were reknown delinquents.

"Are you gonna be alright?"

Nakayama inquired with concern.

"I"ll be fine."

"Erm... Iori?" Nakayama said nervously.

"I understand Iori is putting on this frightening look towards Setouchi-san because of the dispute between you two... but why are you acting so coldly towards us too?"

Why...? I knew it was wrong. But there was no going back for me.

"Nothing particular... it"s normal."

Normal? Really? ...But I was no longer normal anyway.

"Inaba-san told us that there"s a reason why you"re acting like this. I believe so too, but..."

"I see."

I avoided Nakayama"s eyes and headed towards the door.

"...I don"t understand this, Iori."

Me neither.

"Shouldn"t you be reflecting already?"

Setouchi said in a haughty manner.

You"re nothing but a chicken without those two behind your back, I cursed in my head. I was completely taken over by spite.

"I don"t recall doing anything worth reflecting about."

Honestly, all I did was rejecting the one Setouchi liked, s.h.i.+royama Shouto. And now she was nagging me because of that, I thought it was ridiculous... That being said, if I was a bit more tactful, things probably wouldn"t have come to this. Why did I keep making all these unnecessary moves?

I had this odd feeling that, there was something on Setouchi that reminded me of myself...

"You truly are a shameless one aren"t you?"

Setouchi stared at me angrily.

"You made Yaegas.h.i.+ pull all those nonsense. You tricked Yaegas.h.i.+ into doing that for you, didn"t you?"

"...What are you talking about?"

Now that I thought of it, Nakayama had said something like that as well. Did Taichi and the others do something? Why? I was not worth their trouble at all. I could not answer to their expectation.

"Ha!" Setouchi sneered. "Hmph, playing the fool now are we? Oh well, whatever. What happened to that mask of yours anyway? You"ve given up on playing sweet already?"

As though mocking, the two girls behind Setouchi started snickering.

That stirred me greatly, so I decided to provoke them.

"In the end, what are you trying to do? What are you after?"

I said it in a manner that hinted "Are you really that bored that you"d waste your time like this?" towards them.

Upon hearing my words, Setouchi retracted her smile (though the two behind her remained unfazed).

"...I have no need to answer you."

Setouchi answered straightforwardly. She did not have any particular goal in mind after all.

"By the way, the club you"re part of, Cultural Research... what again? The club you"re part of seem to be competing with the Jazz Band for a club advisor. I heard you"re going to decide the outcome on the club presentation event, are you?"

I was the club president, yet I had been ignoring the entire ordeal. What a terrible person I am. However, I decided to brush aside my conscience for the time being.

"So?"

"I want you to forfeit."

Oh, really now.

"Your club"s just a party club, is it not? Doing stuff like snooping out love affairs between teachers and publish a news article for it."

She was talking about Inaba"s article during the Cultural Festival.

"Why does a serious club like the Jazz Band have to be interfered by your kind of people?"

"You"re not one the Jazz Band anyway, Setouchi-san."

"Shut up!"

"Is it because s.h.i.+royama-san"s one of the Jazz Band?"

"...I said shut up!"

I was probably overdoing it. There must be better ways than provoking her like this. No normal people would do this.

Setouchi"s face turned red.

"Just stop interfering with them!"

She didn"t seem very used to threatening people. Her tone was a lot less intimidating than it could"ve been. Perhaps that was why I was able to remain so calm.

"There"s no point telling me that. The ones who"ve been working hard are everyone but me in the club."

"I want you to sabotage from the inside."

"What"s in it for me?"

"Do you know your position right now?"

"No I don"t."

"You...!"

I must say though——

[ I think I"ve figured it out... Setouchi Kaoru, she... Seems like my intuition weren"t as dull as I thought after all. ]

This seemingly cryptic "Sentiment Transmission" of mine was transmitted to Yui and Aoki. I doubt they would be able to understand it.

Meanwhile, one of those two girls behind Setouchi spoke:

"...She"s starting to get on my nerve. I say we teach her a lesson."

A wicked smile emerged on her face. The other girl followed: "I think so too~"

One of them whispered into Setouchi"s ear.

"Such as... let... do this... like that."

"Eh? That... isn"t that a little overboard..."

Setouchi seemed hesitant.

Ah, I knew it, Setouchi, she——

"It"s fine. Those guys... All we need to say... anything..."

"Y-You"re right, good idea... It"s your fault."

Setouchi said with a shady look on her face and walked away. The other two followed suit.

"What is she up to..."

I murmured to myself as I was left alone in the hallway.

I had a bad feeling about this.

My legs began to tremble.

I was afraid.

What I just did. What this situation was. Their continue antagonism. Should the situation escalate, should n.o.body believe me anymore——Were these all because of my current self?

They mentioned the CRC. If I brought trouble for everyone, what should I do? I figured I would need to keep an eye on Setouchi. I should check on the club room too.

What the h.e.l.l? Just what did I really want to do?

Shut up. Shut up. Shut up already.

Would it have been better the other way? ...Or would it"ve not? Which one was it?

...I did not know what to do anymore.

Translator"s NotesJump up↑ Translates: What is this guy talking about all of the sudden?Jump up↑ Translates: Inaba Himeko has always believed this man to be an idiot and today she is able to confirm it once more. This man is an idiot. A freaking idiot. f.u.c.k you.

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