Living to Suffer

NSFW

XV

Since he knew the exact date of his death, he used tolove to count the days when he was young. As he counted, he would wish for intangibletime to transform into a tangible almanac. That way he would be able to reachout and flip to that page while no one was looking and rip it out – there werea million, a gazillion pages; n.o.body would notice one missing page, would they?

But then as time pa.s.sed and he grew older, one day he no longer wanted tobe that time thief.

Even when someone told him there were two months left, and he knew thesewould be his last two months, he only grunted and went to sleep without seeinga single dream.

Unfortunately, his sound sleep was disturbed. Heblinked open his eyes to find Shen Liangsheng standing by the bed, a hazy,white figure in his sleepy vision.

“Ch’in Ching, I’m off,” the man said flatly as he bent over and gave alight pat on his cheek.

Rolled up in quilts with only his head showing, Ch’in Ching looked like abean sprout in a loosely tucked spring roll. With the gentle slap, his headfell to one side as his mouth went off on a clumsy rant, “Look at the time…whywon’t you let me sleep…”

After his mumbling, the man left the bedside and exited with a creak of thedoor. His eyelids then clashed in battle twice before calling truce andreuniting. This time he had a short, transient dream.

In the dream, the summer sun was dazzling white. Inthe light was a silhouette, washed pale by the light.

The figure kept retreating farther and farther, but he could still see iteven when it became as small as a needle point.

He did not know to whom that silhouette belonged but began to wonder if hewas to run after it.

But the next thing he knew, it was gone.

The sky was painted in twilight by the time he awokeagain. Ch’in Ching was actually glad that he managed to elude the first day ofthe year by sleeping. As for his dream, he didn’t recall a thing.

On the third day, he received the routine New Year’s letter from his shifu. In past years he would send himNew Year and springtime salutations through the elegantly paced characters ofpoetry, but this year not only was the letter dense, it was written in a codethat only the two of them understood. Ch’in Ching felt agony just looking atthe tightly packed chicken scratches.

It took all his effort to translate the page to comprehensible text. A largeportion was proper business: arrangements have been made in the imperial court,Huiming-tashi would give his aid, andhe hoped the plan of helpingthe boat along the current would work. Finally, the last sentence was a littlemore personal.

“Hengsu, my son, with you as company, your shifu’s lifetime was not so lonesomeafter all.”

Look atthis old geezer, Ch’in Ching ridiculed silently, calling me his son and then calling himself shifu. The fellow must besenile!

Then he sat before the chicken scratches for the entire night.

When dawn broke, he yawned and rubbed his raw eyes. Instead of going tobed, he packed a small bag, rented a carriage in town and headed off toShaolin.

Huiming-tashiwas a younger fellow disciple of Huisheng-tashi whoknew about the situation at hand, and when he saw Ch’in Ching he greeted, “Amitābha, you should nothave come, Ch’in-shichu.”

Despitebeing on holy ground, Ch’in Ching wore a playful grin. He replied that he knewhe should not have come, so he had not told his shifu and asked Tashi notto tattle.

Thetwo men then locked themselves in a praying room for nearly two hours. Ch’inChing had said he should not have come but still wanted to be a part of his shifu’s “helping the boat along” plan.

Huiming-tashi only listened quietly but in theend gave a nod of agreement. Reciting Amitābha’sname once more, he cast his eyes down with prayer beads in hand. “Ch’in-shichu, the world is filled withuncountable affinities, and ‘tis difficult to let go.” He looked back up, hiswords sharp, his eyes benevolent. “The world isfilled with uncountable affinities, but you have let go.”

Ch’inChing rose and replied solemnly, “The words ‘let go’ have weight in themselves,thus declaring them would become a burden. I only want to thank you for givingconsent.”

After lingering for several days, Ch’in Ching finallydescended the mountain after making all the arrangements.

Meanwhile,the Hsing Sect had long caught wind of Shaolin’s recent movements and itssubstantial increase in defence – suspicious indeed.

“Shen-hufa,what do you think about the idea that it’s in the Treasure PaG.o.da? Could itreally be?”

Thedate was approaching, and the deputy leader had gone into isolation for cultivation. Three of the fourt’angchu were away searching for thelost pages, leaving only Miao Jan and Shen Liangsheng to handle theadministration of the sect. Naturally, they had no time to think about otherthings, so even their references for each other changed.

“Thata tree hides in a forest is not far from impossible.”

“Well,I think it’s a ruse. I bet they want nothing more than for us to run circlesaround that crummy shrine of theirs and not go elsewhere.”

“Isthere news from elsewhere?”

“Well,no.”

“Onlyone month remains till the celestial date. Even if it is a ruse, it requires aninvestigation – and sooner rather than later.

“Doyou plan to depart today? Should I accompany you?”

“ElderFang and Elder Wu should accompany me. I ask that Miao-t’angchu stay and care for the sect.”

“Nokidding? So you’re actually not working alone this time?” Indeed, they agreedit would be business first, but she could not help but tease him. “I guess youknow that although your dear little doctor saved you once, he can’t always bethere to rescue you.”

“…”Shen Liangsheng shot her a look before rising and walking out of the hall. Onlyat the entrance did he reply. “I forgot to mention, Miao-t’angchu, we tried the balm. I pa.s.s on thanks from the missus.”

“…”Miao Jan still had a mouthful of tea, and she didn’t know whether to spit itout or swallow it. In the end, she shooed the man away smilingly.

Although the ancient, solemn monasteries of Shaolin certainly were not the crummy shrines thatMiao Jan described, the Treasure PaG.o.da, hidden behind numerous temples andhalls, was a two-storey wooden structure that appeared unremarkable. ShenLiangsheng and the two accompanying elders were extremely skilled, and underthe cover of night they advanced with the wind, their shadows blending into onewith the air. Not even the finest nets could catch the clear breeze, and thusnot a soul was disturbed during their entire journey.

No sign of martial monks near the Treasure PaG.o.da –perhaps security was only tight on the outside, or perhaps it was a trap.

Only when he had come within thirty feet of the paG.o.da did he reveal himself,his figure clearly halting in midair rather than touching the ground. This logic-defyingability to freeze in midair was truly supernatural.

The two elders were indeed skilled, but ultimately they did not have themantra that Shen Liangsheng had. Even had they sensed the danger, they would nothave been able to avoid alighting upon the ground. And once they did, the worldaround them immediately shifted. They couldn’t even see the dirt beneath theirfeet, let alone the wooden paG.o.da thirty feet away. Up, down, left, right, itwas a state of complete chaos, as though P’ankuhad never awoken, and the heaven and sky had never been separated. Everythingbefore them had become “empty.”

And even though Shen Liangsheng had not landed, he, too, was ensnared bythe formation. Calm and composed, he did not immediately search for an exit butinstead closed his eyes and felt the working of the formation in order to readits structure.

“One sp.a.w.ns two. Two sp.a.w.ns three. Three sp.a.w.nsall things and all beings…” Verysoon, Shen Liangsheng opened his eyes and walked three paces forth. As he expected,a barrage of what seemed like all the blades in the world came flying at him.He remarked unemotionally, “What a death trap.”

Since he was prepared, he had activated his neikung as protection. Once, Huisheng-tashi had broken through this shield of his and dealt him a deadlyblow, but that also sucked the monk dry of a century’s worth of cultivation.The storm of blades seemed boundless, but against his shield they became aslethal as feathers.

The creator of this formation evidently knew the intruders would not bethat easy to repel, and after the blade rain ceased, the next attack wastriggered. Metal sp.a.w.ns water, water sp.a.w.ns wood; in one moment, the worldseemed to be swallowed in tidal waves, and in the next, huge logs were tumblingtowards him. Man had limited power, and when it ran out, he would die in thetrap.

Unfortunately for the defenders, Shen Liangsheng was not a normal man.After the second round of fire element attacks, he had a fairly good grasp of the workings of theformation. Not only did he feel confident, he even found it familiar.

“Ch’in Ching…” Once he reached the appraisal, hissword left its sheath, and he leapt not away but straight for the centre of theformation. Even he was surprised at the lack of fury within himself. Insteadsomething unrelated came to mind – it appeared the man hadn’t been completely caughtup with that girl and really did learn that book well.

“I wonder what he would have to say this time.” Thecentre was the crux of the entire formation, and the dangers only multiplied ashe pressed forward, but he still had the luxury to ponder, “Will he let mestick a sword through him again like last time and then say ‘lesson learnt,’ orwill he find some silly excuse for himself?”

“Ch’in Ching, do you really think I’d let this one goas easily as last time? Or do you truly believe I couldn’t bear to take yourlife?” With that, he started to feel his anger rising, but the next moment herecalled what the man had once said – Let’s say a day comes when you and I must face eachother over life or death. Surely the one to die would be me while the one tolive would be you – and for some reason it died downjust as quickly as it had risen.

“If I knew he would get into such a mess, I would never have left him aloneat his medicine hut. I would’ve taken him back to the sect and entrusted him toMiao Jan, then there wouldn’t be any of this!”

Shen Liangsheng had not wanted to take Ch’in Ching back to the sect for hisown good – the Hsing Sect was a place easier to enter than to leave; the erstwhileherb retrieval was already a one-time occurrence – and now that regret hadtaken root, it meant he had subconsciously made his decision.

The man had predicted correctly. He couldn’t bear taking his life forsomething like this.

The centre wasusually the place of security for the creator, so naturally the defence aroundit would be even more deadly.

Ch’in Ching’s formation, however, was quite peculiar. The centre had nomore attacks; it was just a peaceful void.

Shen Liangsheng stepped into that tranquil s.p.a.ce. The void was notcompletely black but grey like dusk on an autumn evening. And it was a foggyevening, slightly cool and moist.

A faint silhouette stoodin the mist, and it became more defined with every step.

Eventually, it revealed its form.

In that moment, Shen Liangsheng was. .h.i.t with therealization that it was all written in fate.

And his entire life had been but a prelude to three things – asummer shower, a glimpse of inky reeds, and one man.

For that man’s earnest gaze to find him, for his hand to reach towards him,and for the wheels of destiny to fall into place.

“Ch’in Ching.” Shen Liangsheng knew his voiceharboured no temper or threat and did not expect to scare the man, but after along time he received no response

He took a few more steps, and only then did he see – Ch’in Ching had never manned the formationhimself. What he had seen were just false shapes and mirages.

“He sure disappeared quickly this time…” For once,Shen-hufa couldn’t tell if he wantedto frown or smile. He stopped in front of the figure and reached out his lefthand. Sure enough, his fingers went right through the shadows without a hint ofresistance.

Business was business, and he had to crack theformation. No more delays; he sliced through the figure with his sword.Channelling only a fraction of power through the blade, the mirage shatteredinto nothing.

With the centre destroyed, the formation was dissolved.The three saw each other again, naturally in a spot about thirty feet away fromthe paG.o.da. Shen Liangsheng did not appear very ruffled, but the two elders hada few scratches here and there.

“Greetings, Shen-shichu.”

The paG.o.da doors swung open, and Huisheng-tashi stepped out alone with a dozen orso monks at attention behind him in what must have been the infamous Eighteen Arhats Formation.

“I am forever indebted to Huisheng-tashifor the precious lesson last time.” A weapon of destruction in hand, ShenLiangsheng was still so very polite in a way that made the two elders’ jawshurt from clenching them. “It is my fortune in three lifetimes to be able toreceive more invaluable knowledge from you again today.”

“You are too humble, Shichu. Tobe honest with you, the thing you seek is certainly in my hands. Only this iteminvolves matters far greater, and I hope you will refrain from collecting moreb.l.o.o.d.y sins for the sake of the lives under the heaven.”

“You overstate your words, Tashi.I only wish to retrieve what had been lost, but since you will not permit it, Iwill have to beg your pardon.” As he raised his sword, an aura of death ama.s.sedabove, crushing the impending dawn. “Let us commence.”